Wayne Trades!

[Retrac he/him]

Sweet that sounds like a great party gag. Have some candy eggs.

I have 9% milk anyone want it.

[Soulbinder she/her]

Meh, I’ll take it. Here’s a random person’s spoon in trade.

I have a homemade milkshake.

[Mat he/him]

Mmm, tasty!. Here, have a cookie.

I have 3.1415926535897932384626433 slices of blueberry pie.

Edited June 11, 2020 by Matrim's_Dice

[SirWolfe]

5 minutes ago, Matrim's_Dice said:

I have 3.1415926535897932384626433 slices of blueberry pie.

That seems to me like a mighty smart person thing, so I'll give you this glass flask I may or may not have found in an unattended laboratory.

I have a bottle of nitric acid (ask no questions...)

[+Doomstick he/him]

Oops! I just spilled my hydrochloric acid into it! 
i have a bottle of aqua regia

[Shard of Reading he/him]

I will give you some gold

I have a bar of solid uranium

[SirWolfe]

1 hour ago, Shard of Reading said:

I have a bar of solid uranium

Here's an FBI GPS tracker that may or may not still be active. 

I have a bucket of sand.

[first void]

Have a half eaten chouta.

I have Sanderson's  Language Arts report card.

[+Doomstick he/him]

Here’s my report card!

i have a folding chair

[Soulbinder she/her]

Hm... maybe it’s bendalloy. I’ll check. Have a folding table.

I have treatment for lead poisoning.

[Enter a username]

Thank you!

Have a folding house.

[Soulbinder she/her]

Why, thank you. You’ll need this tent. It does not fold, sadly.

I have annoyance at siblings.

[Enter a username]

Cool! Now I have two!

I have a book that everybody either LOVES or HATES. No in between. You either LOVE it or you HATE it.

[Shard of Reading he/him]

I will give you a blue nacho

I have a list of the unkown shards

[Mat he/him]

TAKE ALL MY MONEY! ALL OF IT! TAKE IT ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

I have an iPhone SE, 2020 version (that has been smashed with a sledgehammer)

[Shard of Reading he/him]

I have a old game boy with a missing battery

I have your nachos

[Soulbinder she/her]

Have my nachos.

I have an addiction to the 17th Shard

[Mat he/him]

Sorry. Already got one.

I have thirty-seven golden buddhas. Help.

[Soulbinder she/her]

Well... those are pretty awesome even if you aren’t Buddhist. I’ll trade you for thirty seven golden carrots.

I have a golden potato.

[+Doomstick he/him]

Now you have a mashed potato 

I have a gilded loaf of bread

[Soulbinder she/her]

I’ll give you gilded butter.

I have golden toast.

[BeaverBuster]

Great, I can give you some silver toast for that

I have a really terrible report card

[Mat he/him]

I'll turn you down (is that allowed?) 

I've got a Shardcast episode from July 5, 2019.

[Shard of Reading he/him]

I have a link to an obscure weird al song.

I have your nachos.

[Enter a username]

Thank you! Have my nachos! 

I have... let's see... My birthday, which was 4 days ago.