Random Stuff VIII: The Admin Special

[Edgedancer he/him]

Nope. 

 

And now she's on maternity leave and apparently is legally obligated not to talk to me anymore. 

...Which country do you live in again?

[Delightful]

Note to self: do not watch Supernatural late at night, alone, in the dark.

........

I'm only on episode five guys!

[Oversleep]

I just found out another job for Steelrunners in pre-industrial era:

Edited April 25, 2016 by Oversleep

[+Slowswift he/him]

[DanTheSeamonster he/him]

@delightful and edgedancer; I live in the U.S. I'm not sure if that's a federal law or just my college's policy, but we do have some other funky rules around campus so it wouldn't surprise me if that's just a part of her contract with the school itself.

[Mistrunner]

Ah, creating résumés: the perfect time to reflect on how little you've done with your life.

Let's see... Experience:

• organized sock drawer in '08

• reorganized sock drawer in '11

• was paid $5 to wash cars

• wrote cheesy physical fitness article for local newspaper to earn extra credit in PE

Skills:

• binge-watching Netflix

• sleeping

• making toast

• balancing spoon on nose

And one I have stolen from the guy next to me:

• creating humorous internet "memes"

Accomplishments:

• read Words of Radiance in two days

• ate 20 cookies in one sitting- several times

• received participation trophies for first-grade soccer

Hire plz? :/)

[Orlion Blight he/him]

Just remember: almost all advice you hear about resumes becomes outdated when it is time for you to submit some.

[Mistrunner]

Just remember: almost all advice you hear about resumes becomes outdated when it is time for you to submit some.

It all just reminds me of that SNL sketch. "You're going to end up living in a van down by the river!"

[Sunbird she/her]

Don't feel bad, Mistrunner... I had like no work experience when I graduated high school.

[Zathoth]

Ah, creating résumés: the perfect time to reflect on how little you've done with your life.

Let's see... Experience:

• organized sock drawer in '08

• reorganized sock drawer in '11

• was paid $5 to wash cars

• wrote cheesy physical fitness article for local newspaper to earn extra credit in PE

Skills:

• binge-watching Netflix

• sleeping

• making toast

• balancing spoon on nose

And one I have stolen from the guy next to me:

• creating humorous internet "memes"

Accomplishments:

• read Words of Radiance in two days

• ate 20 cookies in one sitting- several times

• received participation trophies for first-grade soccer

Hire plz? :/)

You know that should at least amount to something. That is impressive.

[Haelbarde he/him]

Ah, creating résumés: the perfect time to reflect on how little you've done with your life.

Let's see... Experience:

• organized sock drawer in '08

• reorganized sock drawer in '11

• was paid $5 to wash cars

• wrote cheesy physical fitness article for local newspaper to earn extra credit in PE

Skills:

• binge-watching Netflix

• sleeping

• making toast

• balancing spoon on nose

And one I have stolen from the guy next to me:

• creating humorous internet "memes"

Accomplishments:

• read Words of Radiance in two days

• ate 20 cookies in one sitting- several times

• received participation trophies for first-grade soccer

Hire plz? :/)

Volunteer! Even if it's not necessarily relevant, it's real word experience to put on the resume, along with a referee. 

[Voidus]

Ah, creating résumés: the perfect time to reflect on how little you've done with your life.

Let's see... Experience:

• organized sock drawer in '08

• reorganized sock drawer in '11

• was paid $5 to wash cars

• wrote cheesy physical fitness article for local newspaper to earn extra credit in PE

Skills:

• binge-watching Netflix

• sleeping

• making toast

• balancing spoon on nose

And one I have stolen from the guy next to me:

• creating humorous internet "memes"

Accomplishments:

• read Words of Radiance in two days

• ate 20 cookies in one sitting- several times

• received participation trophies for first-grade soccer

Hire plz? :/)

Ah, then we might be responsible for something here. On the plus side one of those cookies probably gave you the ability to balance a spoon on your nose, so it's not all bad if you don't mind loosing your chance at salvation and an eternal soul.

[Edgedancer he/him]

Ah, creating résumés: the perfect time to reflect on how little you've done with your life.

Let's see... Experience:

• organized sock drawer in '08

• reorganized sock drawer in '11

• was paid $5 to wash cars

• wrote cheesy physical fitness article for local newspaper to earn extra credit in PE

Skills:

• binge-watching Netflix

• sleeping

• making toast

• balancing spoon on nose

And one I have stolen from the guy next to me:

• creating humorous internet "memes"

Accomplishments:

• read Words of Radiance in two days

• ate 20 cookies in one sitting- several times

• received participation trophies for first-grade soccer

Hire plz? :/)

I never managed to balance a spoon on my nose, so color me impressed.

[Curious Anamaximder he/him]

Ah, creating résumés: the perfect time to reflect on how little you've done with your life.

Let's see... Experience:

• organized sock drawer in '08

• reorganized sock drawer in '11

• was paid $5 to wash cars

• wrote cheesy physical fitness article for local newspaper to earn extra credit in PE

Skills:

• binge-watching Netflix

• sleeping

• making toast

• balancing spoon on nose

And one I have stolen from the guy next to me:

• creating humorous internet "memes"

Accomplishments:

• read Words of Radiance in two days

• ate 20 cookies in one sitting- several times

• received participation trophies for first-grade soccer

Hire plz? :/)

You might want to add being a totally wonderful, creative, kind and supportive person to that list.

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her]

Ah, creating résumés: the perfect time to reflect on how little you've done with your life.

Let's see... Experience:

• organized sock drawer in '08

• reorganized sock drawer in '11

• was paid $5 to wash cars

• wrote cheesy physical fitness article for local newspaper to earn extra credit in PE

Skills:

• binge-watching Netflix

• sleeping

• making toast

• balancing spoon on nose

And one I have stolen from the guy next to me:

• creating humorous internet "memes"

Accomplishments:

• read Words of Radiance in two days

• ate 20 cookies in one sitting- several times

• received participation trophies for first-grade soccer

Hire plz? :/)

 

Let's apply the power of spin to this resume, shall we?  

 

Experience: 

• Directed and initiated multiple organization projects with practical benefits
• Participated in paid customer service initiatives 
• Wrote piece encouraging fellow students to attain personal fitness goals 

Skills 

• Evaluating entertainment choices in real time 
• Effectively using downtime to improve personal health 
• Time-effective cooking 
• Low-cost, high-yield entertainment 

Accomplishments 

• Assimilated long and complex schematic of cause and effect in extremely short period of time, with 90% retention rate
• Performed quality test on popular items in a time-effective manner 
• Participated in community- and team-building activities at a young age 

 

You're welcome.  

[Left he/him]

Let's apply the power of spin to this resume, shall we?

Experience:

• Directed and initiated multiple organization projects with practical benefits
• Participated in paid customer service initiatives
• Wrote piece encouraging fellow students to attain personal fitness goals

Skills

• Evaluating entertainment choices in real time
• Effectively using downtime to improve personal health
• Time-effective cooking
• Low-cost, high-yield entertainment

Accomplishments

• Assimilated long and complex schematic of cause and effect in extremely short period of time, with 90% retention rate
• Performed quality test on popular items in a time-effective manner
• Participated in community- and team-building activities at a young age

You're welcome.

All humor aside, this is EXACTLY what you should try to do with your resume when you're just getting started. Once you get in the door and are able to add job experience and stuff, the resume will feel less fluffy. Even then you're still going to be spinning your resumes for a looong time

[TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her]

Walgreens logic:

"Our restrooms are our most precious resource. We must protect them with a storming combination lock that can only be opened by the worthy--that is, people who buy one of our overpriced, piece-of-crem products first."

That's the last time I set foot in one of those stores.

[The Sovereign he/him]

Ah, then we might be responsible for something here. On the plus side one of those cookies probably gave you the ability to balance a spoon on your nose, so it's not all bad if you don't mind loosing your chance at salvation and an eternal soul.

 

Voidus, I feel the need to ask; Who did you take the spoon balancing ability from?

[Quiver he/him]

I... I just realized my school never taught us about World War II.

 

How did they manage to cover the entire 20th century without going into details of World War II?

[Delightful]

Mistrunner, every babysit? Respnsibility.

Team sports? Teamwork skills.

Had a school leadership position/title/anything? Leadership skills!

You can also write things like good interpersonal skills (you're friends with all of us just through the power of text!)

You could also write that you read a lot - if you want a job at a library or bookstore or something it might help.

Quiver: oh my what seriously. Like literally nothing?? How even. What.

[Blaze1616 he/him]

I... I just realized my school never taught us about World War II.

 

How did they manage to cover the entire 20th century without going into details of World War II?

 

...Are you sure? That was a fairly important time for the UK, plus they won, so I don't see why they'd bother hiding it. Maybe you forgot? Because the notion that the UK wouldn't bother teaching you of Winston Churchill is...well it would blow my mind.

[Quiver he/him]

...Are you sure? That was a fairly important time for the UK, plus they won, so I don't see why they'd bother hiding it. Maybe you forgot? Because the notion that the UK wouldn't bother teaching you of Winston Churchill is...well it would blow my mind.

 

They didn't hide it or anything. I just suddenly sorta realized that they never really covered it as it's own seperate subject.

 

Too put in context for my "20th Century history" realisation, we covered the following:

-World War I (albeit very basically in first year, with a major emphasis on the Somme)

-The Roaring 20's

-The Great Depression

-The Rise of Facism in Italy and Germany

-The Bolshevik Revoltion as a starting point to get into the Cold War

-The irish Civil Right Movement

-The Troubles

 

We didn't not know about World War II or anything, but it just dawned on me that we mostly covered it either in terms of how it impacted domestic policy (during the war) or International Policy afterward. Actual, World War II itself? Nope.

Also, it might be a major point that I'm Irish, so we focused more on Irelands history than England's. But still. 

 

I feel very self-concious and ashamed right now. 

Edited April 26, 2016 by Quiver

[Delightful]

They didn't hide it or anything. I just suddenly sorta realized that they never really covered it as it's own seperate subject.

Too put in context for my "20th Century history" realisation, we covered the following:

-World War I (albeit very basically in first year, with a major emphasis on the Somme)

-The Roaring 20's

-The Great Depression

-The Rise of Facism in Italy and Germany

-The Bolshevik Revoltion as a starting point to get into the Cold War

-The irish Civil Right Movement

-The Troubles

We didn't not know about World War II or anything, but it just dawned on me that we mostly covered it either in terms of how it impacted domestic policy (during the war) or International Policy afterward. Actual, World War II itself? Nope.

I feel very self-concious and ashamed right now.

It's hardly your fault! It's also easily remedied. There are plenty online resources for history.

[Quiver he/him]

It's hardly your fault! It's also easily remedied. There are plenty online resources for history.

 

True. It just... sorta floored me as a revelation. 

 

(Also, if anyone can recommend ways to research history, I'm all ears. I tend to assume all information online is misinformation)

[Edgedancer he/him]

I... I just realized my school never taught us about World War II.

 

How did they manage to cover the entire 20th century without going into details of World War II?

By being incredibly bad at it?