Delightful Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 (edited) So in the college thread, maxal mentioned that life is better now than previously, while a few people on the Bad Day thread said that they're scared for the future. Whatever age you are, would you go back to being a (insert baby, kid, teen, student, YA, younger adult as appropriate)? Or do you like life better now? Do you think life improves as you go on, or is that a very personal situational thing? Edited June 3, 2015 by Delightful Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kestrel she/her Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 -starts laughing really hard then bursts into tears- Why can't I go back to middle school high school is awful. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Deleted- Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 I waited a very long time to be seen as an adult absolutely not. While I think it's crap that things children say aren't taken seriously, I'm glad to be at an age where being heard is at least a possibility. Not only that, but high school and middle school are crap. I did everything I can to get out of it and was thankful enough to spend what would have been a senior year, at a community college instead. i have never been more relieved than when I escaped "youth" and was finally able to start doing the things I actually wanted to do. Work, write, learn actual things, study the subjects that had peaked my interest for years but never had a chance to look into. Travel. No. I don't miss it. I resented it while I was there, and never once in these last few years have I looked back and hoped I could go back to those days. Middle school was awful, high school was dull. I was literally not allowed to work by law. And I had very little time to do the things that were important to me. There are so many things I want to do, and all my adolescent years did was prevent me from doing anything for the entire beginning of my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistrunner Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Well. Honestly, I have no idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Slowswift he/him Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 (edited) I'm a teenager. You do the math. ... And Actually, I don't mind it that much. Apparently I'm more mellow than most teens. Not so sure about the future.... The past? Torn between cringing away from the horror and wishing I could go back and redo it all. Really I think it all depends. Edited June 4, 2015 by Slowswift 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxal she/her Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Would I ever go back? NEVER. Never in a million years would I ever EVER go back to either teenage or young adult me. Never ever. Youth and a nicer stomach will not even lure me back to who I was back then, which was not all that terrible, but honestly being older do have its perks Let's see... Teenage years. By far the worst years ever Young teenagers on the forum, have you ever had an adult tell disillusioned you these were the best years of your life and should take heed while they last? Well that is by far the most utter crap anyone had ever said Perhaps there are people for whom this is true, but trust me in saying that is not the majority. Being a teenager often means not being comfortable with who you are and how you look. You've got these stupid hormones that gives you ridiculous pimples, greasy hair and whatever changes you go through during those years: they are not pleasant. You look awful, you feel awful. You are not at ease with your physical attributes, so either you hide them or you over-expose them. You don't know how to dress yourself, so either you wear whatever everyone else wears or you wear unflattering clothes or you become a fashion victim or a half-naked wanna be, but whatever you chose, you doubt. You hesitate. You look into the mirror and, if you are a girl, there is a very good chance you will find at least 1000 things going wrong with your body. If you are a guy, well, huh, probably the same thing. You have probably figure out by now the reason you are single was because you were an ugly uninteresting duckling and nobody would ever want to enter a relationship with you. You fail to see what you have to offer and the little flower that only wants to blossom inside you. Worst, you make the mistake in thinking you are old and you are desperate case. Peer pressure is at its maximum and you naively believe this imbecile survey that tells you how abnormal you are if you haven't got your first boyfriend/girlfriend by the time you are 16. Even worst, if you are not interested in finding one right now, you feel completely deflated and start to make assumption it must because you are incapable of love You have a hard time figuring out who you are and a harder time asserting it. You too often lack the self-confidence to take a stand, to make your voice heard, but at the same time you want to take part into the decision making. You want to be treated as an adult, but you aren't an adult, so each time you are being reminded of it: you explode or you brood or whatever, but you don't like it. You are still trying to assess your personal skill set. If you are lucky, you have found something you are good at, but it does not end there. No, no, no, it would too easy, now wouldn't it? Even if you are good at something, you will still find a way to depreciate yourself, to doubt your ability to shine through your particular skill and worst you have no idea what to do with your life. You have to make choices, but you lack the experience to do so. You stress out, you see the future as a continuity of present time. You have hard time figuring out that yes, things do evolve with time and no, nothing ever is permanent. So teenage years? Beurk. Sorry kids, but never ever again would I ever be a teenager and really I look at pictures and storm I looked plain awful Young adult years. Ah, youth. Surely these MUST be the greatest years of your life? Well, perhaps they are, for some people, but in truth you are still storming searching yourself. Oh you naively though all the doubting, self-confidence lack would magically disappeared because you have pass the magic age of 21? ERROR. It didn't. It is still there, but worst you now have to deal with the anxiety of being an adult. You wanted it? You've got it, but you also realize being an adult is not so great after all. You have to make decision, you have to do something with your life and it is not all that easy to figure it out. At least puberty is finally over or so you think but why do I still get stupid pimples? WHY? Why can't my skin acknowledge I am not 15 anymore? Oh well, because it will... sometimes in between 20 and 30... If you are a girl, you become increasingly more aware of publicity and public image. If you are over-weighted, you depreciate yourself or you go on foolish diets or you just give up. If you are skinny, you yearn for more mature curves. And if you are storming perfect, you still find SOMETHING you hate about yourself? Aren't you tights a little too big??? Honey, does this dress make me look fat???? Eurk. If you are a guy... well you saw the pictures... have you got the abs? The biceps? Do you like sports? So yeah even guys now think of these things. You thought it wouldn't be as bad because you are now an ADULT and not a TEENAGER? Nope. Not how it works. It get worst. Or maybe it doesn't, but truth is you are still not a 100% comfortable with yourself. You have about a thousand sharp edges and you are barely starting to see it. You want to improve yourself, but you do not know how. You often think you need to change your personality all together. Relationship wise, well perhaps it starts to settle down. You may have found a special someone or maybe you haven't. You thought you were a desperate case at 17. You are 21 and you still haven't manage to get into a relationship? Gee. Must be something wrong with you. You now have the living proof nobody will ever want you, so you give up. You resigned yourself to end your days alone. This is your fate. Work-wise, well perhaps you have integrated the work market which makes you realize something incredible: everyone else knows better than you and oups school did not taught you everything you needed. Work is brutal. You are inexperienced. Your colleagues are you parents age. Your parents! How lame You clash with the older generation or you don't, but you have to deal with it, that and the fact you can now appreciate how little you know about everything. Gee, you thought you knew everything. Money-wise, you finally have some, but oh surprise, gee life is expensive Your meager salary does not pay much and who is this government that steels half of your money? Retirement? Do you really need to think about it NOW? Well, huh, yes. You do. Sorry. So yeah, being a young adult is pretty much like being a teenage, with slightly more self-confidence, a great more dose of doubting and stress/anxiety that comes from having to carve your own life. Depressing? Does it ever get better? It does: sometimes between your late-twenties and your early thirties, it settles down. You gain experience. You start to make your proofs. You start to realize you are rather capable, worthy person. You burn all surveys and all magazines You look at yourself in the mirror and FINALLY you think: I am not so bad after all, but perhaps this new fashion is not for me. You are not afraid to affirm yourself anymore because you now know your worth. You play your assets and your skills more wisely. Your weaknesses? Gee, there are still there and you are still working on them, but you have stop turning everything into a storming mountain. You find your place. And you have kids... which makes everything else appear so insignificant and you look back and think: Was I really this person??? Yeah you were, but look how far you have gotten and look ahead: you can go so much farther. So whatever bad things you are feeling/thinking about yourself, it does not last. This is what we call growing up and truly becoming an adult. And it is really worth it Even the grey hair are worth it, I mean they invented hair dye for something, now haven't they? 15 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaymyth she/her Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Nope. Not going back. I have a good life; a job that I (mostly) enjoy, a husband that I adore, and several hobbies that I appear to have gained sufficient levels in to be good at. (There's a prestige class for costuming, right?) We have the added advantage of being a DINK household (Dual Income No Kids), so I can indulge in going to conventions and sewing all the things (usually not in that order). -starts laughing really hard then bursts into tears-Why can't I go back to middle school high school is awful. It gets better, I promise. I know you're afraid of college, but it is better. Given that you have an oft-difficult relationship for your parents, I think you'll find that your daily stress drops liek woah once you're living in a dorm and have a little space to figure yourself out. Yes, there's academic work, but you're not constantly in class all day like you are in high school. Budget your time wisely, and you may find that it's easier to keep up with the workload, even if the classes are more advanced. By far the worst years ever Young teenagers on the forum, have you ever had an adult tell disillusioned you these were the best years of your life and should take heed while they last? Well that is by far the most utter crap anyone had ever said Perhaps there are people for whom this is true, but trust me in saying that is not the majority. I sorrow for these people. I can't imagine what their lives are like that they look back on high school and think about how those were their glory days. Oh, and I'm 37, and I STILL have acne problems. Granted, it's not as bad as when I was a teen/young adult, but it never went away completely. Ugh. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThirdGen Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 "If I could go back and be a teenager again" always means "...but knowing everything I know now," doesn't it? And with the implication that you'd have the hard-won emotional stability of a later stage in life? Well, you wouldn't be a teenager. You'd be a made-up collage of the parts you'd like to assemble for this exercise. Maxal nails it, really, but every phase of your life is the way it is because of what has happened to you so far and what you still don't have yet. You could go back, drop out, and grab your GED, 'cause hey, you already went through real high school. And you could swing through and grab just the friends you were gonna keep and ignore everybody else. After all, when school ends, almost all your classmates go off in random other directions and live their own lives. So then what? Get a job probably at the entry level of whatever field you want to be in, be a prodigy at it, rise through the ranks - you basically Mary Sue your own life. I wouldn't say I'm fully happy, but I'm certainly better than I have been. And while I have no control over my past, I have at least a little control over my future. To the younger ones out there, I'd say this - subsistence money, autonomy, and a clear head. Those help more than anything. With those, you can start to build something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delightful Posted June 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Wow. Thanks guys. And so many times I've heard "enjoy these years, they're the best of your life". I wonder what's up with that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orlion Blight he/him Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Youth is a restrictive cage where one is poked and prodded and put on performance.... adulthood is open air and fending off the myriad eldritch horrors of the abysmal deep as they try to drag your life boat down into the Void... I actually much prefer the later. The struggle is my own, I am better able to define myself and break away from the chains imposed on me by family, society, and religion. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverblade5 he/him Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Wow. Thanks guys. And so many times I've heard "enjoy these years, they're the best of your life". I wonder what's up with that. Librarian myths. All of them. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erai Sedai he/him Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 i'd love to go back and do it all again. but i'm not sure my general feelings would change. i think no matter what you'' always have ups and downs.But that just literally depends on your path Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axies he/him Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Let me think...Wake up at 8:00 go to school/high school/whatever you call it... be there doing nothing with your friends until 14:00 go home, eat something someone cooked for you, go back to "school" from 15:00 to 17:00 be free until tomorrow... Friday school from 9 to 14 and free afternoon playing Pokémon with some friends... and yeah,,, weekends, holydays on summer from June 22th to September 15th.. Xmas from December 22th to January 8th.Vs.Wake up at 6:45 wake up your son, fight with him about eating breakfast/shower/get dressed instead of seeing TV, bring him to school at 9:00, bet at work at 9:45, work until 13:45, go home, make something to eat for you and your wife, eat, enjoy 10-20 mins, go back to work from 16:30 to 20:30 go home, get some dinner at 21:00-21:30... do some laundry, dishes, etc... go to sleep because, you know, you'll wake up at 6:45 again tomorrow... and repeat Mon-Sat... wake up at night because you had the nightmare that your son just died while sleeping... go see if he is ok (or if he is breathing)... go back to bed (not to sleep)... mmmm... Can I get back to where I had 0 responsabilities, free time, free home, free food, free clothing, free games, free everything? please? 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little wilson she/her Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 you naively believe this imbecile survey that tells you how abnormal you are if you haven't got your first boyfriend/girlfriend by the time you are 16. I'm 28, and I still haven't had that. Hurts a lot less now than it did 10 years ago. Funny how age changes your perspective on those things. Like maxal, I wouldn't ever go back to my teenage years. Not for all the money in the world. I got horribly depressed in 8th grade and it took about 10 years for it go away. High school was terrible. Early college wasn't much better. My first year at university was decent, and then I met two fantastic people who became my best friends for a couple years. Got to understand myself a bit better, and--surprise, surprise--the depression went away. My last two semesters at the university were my favorite semesters ever, even though I was taking 18 credits. It was a blast. All of my classes seemed to relate to each other, even though they were in entirely different fields (German, English, and Political Science). And then I graduated. Adult life isn't easy. Work can be exhausting, but at least you're getting paid. And really, 40 hours a week isn't so bad, when you think that it's just 40 hours a week. Unless you're the owner of a business or a workaholic (or a doctor on call, or a few other select professions), you don't take your work home with you. When you leave the office for the day, it's done. There's no homework or studying you have to do. You can use your time how you want. Sure, you have to do your laundry and clean and buy groceries and pay bills and other adult things that kind of suck, but no one's controlling you. Not that you can't still have insecurities. Those crop up. I think they always do, particularly if you've never really taken the time to get to know yourself and feel comfortable with the person you are. I know people in their 50's who are unhappy with life because they just don't know their purpose. But I know people in their early 20's who are so secure in the person they are it's insane. Not everyone has that skill of just understanding themselves though. A few people do. But most people tend to feel lost. And I personally feel that the best way to handle those insecurities is through therapy and counseling. Those tend to get a bad rep: people who need counseling are really broken, but I don't think that's the case at all. It's about recognizing that you're human and you need help because sometimes there are psychological and emotional things that you can't get over by yourself even if you know exactly what the problem is. I couldn't. And my year in counseling was the best decision I ever made. I can easily say now that yes, I'm happy exactly where I am and what I'm doing. And I'm looking forward to whatever else life throws at me because I know that I can handle it. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eerongal he/him Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 It depends; Do i get to take back all my current wisdom and knowledge to my younger self, then upon reaching my current age, get the choice again with the same conditions so that I can do so ad infinitum until i become a supreme being of infinite intelligence? If that's the case, then sign me up! Otherwise, probably not. I'm comfortable with who I am, and pretty much always have been. I learned when i was pretty young that I shouldn't care what other people thought of me, so it make highschool/college/grade school pretty easy for me. I wouldn't mind being younger because getting older sucks physically, but I don't have any desire to go back and repeat/undo my past. Not that I've never made mistakes, it's just that I'm happy with who I am, where i've been, and where i've gotten to. I've never really struggled with self-image issues or depression or anything, so going back to highschool wouldn't be like going into my "dark years" kind of thing, I just have no desire to undo my past, and highschool definitely wasn't my "glory days" by any means. However, I did actually enjoy going to school. I enjoyed learning new things, and now I just have to take it upon myself to learn new things, because i no longer have school there to guide me. Unfortunately, i've noticed this attitude (my attitude overall) isn't exactly common, though. Which is why I can understand why people would dread reliving certain parts of their life. Most people are afraid of adult life because they "don't know what to do", but I've found being an adult is made easier once you realize that EVERYONE is in the same boat. No one has any clue what they're doing. The whole "fake it until you make it" thing is more real than some people realize. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxal she/her Posted June 5, 2015 Report Share Posted June 5, 2015 "If I could go back and be a teenager again" always means "...but knowing everything I know now," doesn't it? And with the implication that you'd have the hard-won emotional stability of a later stage in life? Well, you wouldn't be a teenager. You'd be a made-up collage of the parts you'd like to assemble for this exercise. Maxal nails it, really, but every phase of your life is the way it is because of what has happened to you so far and what you still don't have yet. You could go back, drop out, and grab your GED, 'cause hey, you already went through real high school. And you could swing through and grab just the friends you were gonna keep and ignore everybody else. After all, when school ends, almost all your classmates go off in random other directions and live their own lives. We have a saying here... Assuming you live in North America, why would flight through Paris to go to New-York? Why indeed? Because something happened in Paris. You grew. You learned something. Life is an endless combination of experiences that slowly shapes you into well... you. One colleague once told 23 years old me he loved aging as he fancied growing wiser. I thought he was nuts. Turns out he was not so far of the truth... You do get wiser, but more importantly, you get more confident as you accumulate this amazing life experience. There is good, there is bad and there is ugly, but there is good. Wow. Thanks guys. And so many times I've heard "enjoy these years, they're the best of your life". I wonder what's up with that. I honestly do not know. My mom once told me this one and I raged mad: "What is so great in having to study all evening? You choose to spend your evening cleaning, but you do not have to". There. Life as grown-up is better the more you age, the better you feel inside your own skin and the stronger you get at asserting yourself. Wake up at 6:45 wake up your son, fight with him about eating breakfast/shower/get dressed instead of seeing TV, bring him to school at 9:00, bet at work at 9:45, work until 13:45, go home, make something to eat for you and your wife, eat, enjoy 10-20 mins, go back to work from 16:30 to 20:30 go home, get some dinner at 21:00-21:30... do some laundry, dishes, etc... go to sleep because, you know, you'll wake up at 6:45 again tomorrow... and repeat Mon-Sat... wake up at night because you had the nightmare that your son just died while sleeping... go see if he is ok (or if he is breathing)... go back to bed (not to sleep)... mmmm... Can I get back to where I had 0 responsabilities, free time, free home, free food, free clothing, free games, free everything? please? Sounds like my life 6:20 adults wake-up and get ready, 6:50 kids wake-up, fight with daughter to get her to 1) wake-up, 2) get dress, 3) come and eat breakfast, explains to baby boy that no he can't wear the shirt with a whale on it because it is a pajama, but he can have the crocodile. 7:10 make kids eat, 7:30 leave husband to drop kids a daycare and go to work, 8h15 to 16h00, work, coffee, work, coffee, work, 16h45, get kids at daycare, wait while a daughter finds the 50 drawings she has made today, for you, 17h00, home sweet home and blissful hour of the day where kids are allowed to watch TV so parents can enjoy some leisure time (yeah lazy us, you can judge all you want), 17h45, make supper, 18h30, eat super, 19h00, go play outside, socialize with neighbors, 20h00, baths, stories, bed, 21h00, peace, at last. Insert running a day out of two at 20h00 for me and Home Hardware trips for my husband Saturday morning is swimming class day, so yeah, here I am at 8h45 in the pool being splashed by my son who must have the DNA of either a fish or a frog Sunday morning is gymnastic class, so here I am, pushing, encouraging and helping baby boy to climb the little ladder and jump on the trampoline. Coffee never tasted better. Would never go back. I'm 28, and I still haven't had that. Hurts a lot less now than it did 10 years ago. Funny how age changes your perspective on those things. I have known people who found the perfect one only in their late thirties... All now have beautiful children, born on the late, but 40 is the new 25, so... Otherwise, probably not. I'm comfortable with who I am, and pretty much always have been. I learned when i was pretty young that I shouldn't care what other people thought of me, so it make highschool/college/grade school pretty easy for me. I wouldn't mind being younger because getting older sucks physically, but I don't have any desire to go back and repeat/undo my past. Not that I've never made mistakes, it's just that I'm happy with who I am, where i've been, and where i've gotten to. I've never really struggled with self-image issues or depression or anything, so going back to highschool wouldn't be like going into my "dark years" kind of thing, I just have no desire to undo my past, and highschool definitely wasn't my "glory days" by any means. That's another one I have heard quite often. You have more energy at 20 then at 30, if you wait too long to have kids, you won't be able to follow them. Oh yeah. Great. Another wonderful one. 30 years old isn't exactly old age... 20 years old me was winded when she tried climb stairs and got convinced she would die of muscle atrophy. Today me is in a much, much, much, much better physical shape, it is not even comparable. I have 1000 times more energy now then I did back in my early twenties when I fought against insomnia and ate nachos all day In fact, it gets better, young adult actually need a lot more sleep than older adults? Up until 25 years old, your body still needs long nights which few young adults actually get as many are busy partying somewhere, so they end up being wasted all day long... The worst is, it is actually true. I need less sleep per night than 10 years ago and this is frankly great. I suppose physically aging will suck at some point, but I am not there yet and I have no intention of getting there in the next few years. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonskin she/her Posted June 12, 2015 Report Share Posted June 12, 2015 Wow. Thanks guys. And so many times I've heard "enjoy these years, they're the best of your life". I wonder what's up with that. Same question here, I guess we don't all have the same childhood/teenagehood For my part, no, I would'nt want to go back to my teenage years, which was probably the worst time of my life, I feel way better now. I don’t like to say that wisdom comes with age because it is obviously not always true, but it is certain that I am more serene and happy today that I was twenty years ago. Maybe I’d like to go back to my thirties, because I didn’t have to dye this damnation greying hair, but that's pretty much everything that I regret from my younger years 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elsecaller3414 she/her Posted June 13, 2015 Report Share Posted June 13, 2015 well, I am a teen right now, and it is so stressful that I don't think I would want to go back if I had the choice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fatebreaker he/him Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 I would go, BACK TO THE FUTURE!!! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elsecaller3414 she/her Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 Yes! Hoverboards in 2015 all over again! even though it is 2015 right now, and we don't seem to be making that kind of technological advancement... hmm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Voidus Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 I'd go forward or back at this point, I'm in a city with insanely high unemployment with very little job history applying for literally any job I can only to have it go to someone 5 years younger because they only need to be paid half as much.I'd happily work for the same price if I could but sadly I can't. If however I could fastforward to when I already had a job I'd do that too.So yeah, basically any age that isn't this age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ljósmóður she/her Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 I'm happy where I am now. I didn't hate being a teenager. I was lucky - despite being somewhat unprepossessing and a bit of an oddity as a teenager, I had enough people around me who loved me and accepted me as I was so I didn't really feel my oddness! But now, I'm where I always wanted to be. I'm married to a really special man and I have beautiful children. I don't currently have a career but I was never very career minded so this doesn't feel like a void in my life at present! It hasn't been plain sailing to get here. Like most people, I've had some dark times along the way but, even those, I wouldn't swap because they've brought me to this place where I am very content. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxal she/her Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 I'm happy where I am now. I didn't hate being a teenager. I was lucky - despite being somewhat unprepossessing and a bit of an oddity as a teenager, I had enough people around me who loved me and accepted me as I was so I didn't really feel my oddness! But now, I'm where I always wanted to be. I'm married to a really special man and I have beautiful children. I don't currently have a career but I was never very career minded so this doesn't feel like a void in my life at present! It hasn't been plain sailing to get here. Like most people, I've had some dark times along the way but, even those, I wouldn't swap because they've brought me to this place where I am very content. Just to confirm my pet theory, may I inquire if you would be willing to share in which decade you are, age wise? My theory is people tend to reach a level of acceptance, blissfulness, happiness when they reach their thirties. I sure have reached a calmer, more serene, happier period of my life when I reached 30, which also marked the year I had my first child. So maybe it is not age, but children that makes us more fulfill. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ljósmóður she/her Posted June 17, 2015 Report Share Posted June 17, 2015 Just to confirm my pet theory, may I inquire if you would be willing to share in which decade you are, age wise? My theory is people tend to reach a level of acceptance, blissfulness, happiness when they reach their thirties. I sure have reached a calmer, more serene, happier period of my life when I reached 30, which also marked the year I had my first child. So maybe it is not age, but children that makes us more fulfill. I'm happy to share: I was the big 4-0 last month! So, just out of my thirties. I married when I was 23 and had my first child when I was 27 and my youngest when I was 34 so I've had a very long period of transitioning into adulthood! I know plenty of people who are very content at our age (I think you're similar but a little younger than me?) but who are child-free so I think age is definitely part of coming to feel secure in your own self. But for me, certainly, I always knew I wanted a family and so what I am doing now feels "right" to me. It's that sense of being in the right place, doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing that makes me happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxal she/her Posted June 18, 2015 Report Share Posted June 18, 2015 I'm happy to share: I was the big 4-0 last month! So, just out of my thirties. I married when I was 23 and had my first child when I was 27 and my youngest when I was 34 so I've had a very long period of transitioning into adulthood! I know plenty of people who are very content at our age (I think you're similar but a little younger than me?) but who are child-free so I think age is definitely part of coming to feel secure in your own self. But for me, certainly, I always knew I wanted a family and so what I am doing now feels "right" to me. It's that sense of being in the right place, doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing that makes me happy. I had my first child at 30 and my second one at 33. I just turned 35. I do not know many child free people my age... most of them either have a child or are trying to have one. I also know I was not as confident in myself just a few years ago. Things changed gradually since I reached 30. I never had a great life plan, but I am happy at seeing what I have been building up for years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts