Mental health club!

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

6 minutes ago, Hawks said:

Ope

chelly!!!!

*hugs* 

I recommend getting some

Sometimes it’s an about finding the right one. There are a lot of crap therapist out there

 

ok here to rant abt something

tw suicide 

 

 

  Hide contents

well…. Last night was rough. But to sum it up. Talking with dad about lgbtq stuff, turned into an argument turned into be running out of my house literally having a mental breakdown. And the rough part was some of the bs things he said like how it’s satans way of tearing the family apart. I think he forgot we are literally going through a divorce. Yes dad tell me my identity is tearing family’s apart as this is happening. Anyways i started crying he continued bringing up sewerslide rates among trans and guys and like i was swerlisdal as a girl i will be as a boy storm off slontze. And it spiraled and i almost didnt go home but i had to bc i was tired. Eventually i fell asleep and now im so tired i actually fell asleep in class somehow. Five times.

later he apologized and said when i can find it in my heart i  can forgive him for being a [redacted] dad my whole life then i can. 

Tbh i dont think i can. Him and my mom stormed everything up for me and regardless if they changed or not the past is still written deep in my bones. I just wanna sleep and not wake up bro

special thanks to @whirte (still cant tag grr) for helping me a little and @Through The Living Glass abd @Dabi for staying on the phone with me half the night. You’re all the bestest ever. And I couldn’t be more happy to have you as friends 

I could use hugs please

*HUGS*

[Keke They/he]

3 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*squeezes*

I couldn't be more happy to have you as a friend, either

Love you, dude

I wuv uuuu

Can u adopt me? I require more mothers 

I have

1

2

3

4

but i need more. 

2 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

*Huuuuge hugs*

I may not agree with your choice, but your dad is not handling this the right way. You can disapprove but still be respectful.

*hugs*

1 minute ago, Mag said:

Alright, I hope you find something that works. At the very least, we're here for you 

*huuuug*

I'm so sorry, that's awful.

*huggs* *sigh*

Just now, Kaladin Stormcursed said:

*HUGS*

*hugs*

[That1Cellist he/him]

4 minutes ago, Hawks said:

Ope

chelly!!!!

*hugs* 

I recommend getting some

Sometimes it’s an about finding the right one. There are a lot of crap therapist out there

 

ok here to rant abt something

tw suicide 

 

 

  Reveal hidden contents

well…. Last night was rough. But to sum it up. Talking with dad about lgbtq stuff, turned into an argument turned into be running out of my house literally having a mental breakdown. And the rough part was some of the bs things he said like how it’s satans way of tearing the family apart. I think he forgot we are literally going through a divorce. Yes dad tell me my identity is tearing family’s apart as this is happening. Anyways i started crying he continued bringing up sewerslide rates among trans and guys and like i was swerlisdal as a girl i will be as a boy storm off slontze. And it spiraled and i almost didnt go home but i had to bc i was tired. Eventually i fell asleep and now im so tired i actually fell asleep in class somehow. Five times.

later he apologized and said when i can find it in my heart i  can forgive him for being a [redacted] dad my whole life then i can. 

Tbh i dont think i can. Him and my mom stormed everything up for me and regardless if they changed or not the past is still written deep in my bones. I just wanna sleep and not wake up bro

special thanks to @whirte (still cant tag grr) for helping me a little and @Through The Living Glass abd @Dabi for staying on the phone with me half the night. You’re all the bestest ever. And I couldn’t be more happy to have you as friends 

I could use hugs please

Dang, that's a lot.

* hugs for thee * 

Being alive is definitely an experience, isn't it? Or I guess it's that the only experience is being alive. Either way, it is most peculiar.

Spoiler

On a little bit more serious of a note, do you listen to music a lot? When I'm really having a tough time, I use music as an outlet for my emotions, whether it's playing or listening to it. It's really helpful for me.

Another thing that I do is just lay on the ground and stare at the ceiling. I know it sounds stupid, but it's actually very calming if you do it in a quiet place where you can just sit and think. Bonus points for playing music at the same time, and even more for doing it outside while looking at the stars. I find it very calming, or at the very least a good time to reflect and think through things.

 

[Keke They/he]

Just now, That1Cellist said:

Dang, that's a lot.

* hugs for thee * 

Being alive is definitely an experience, isn't it? Or I guess it's that the only experience is being alive. Either way, it is most peculiar.

  Hide contents

On a little bit more serious of a note, do you listen to music a lot? When I'm really having a tough time, I use music as an outlet for my emotions, whether it's playing or listening to it. It's really helpful for me.

Another thing that I do is just lay on the ground and stare at the ceiling. I know it sounds stupid, but it's actually very calming if you do it in a quiet place where you can just sit and think. Bonus points for playing music at the same time, and even more for doing it outside while looking at the stars. I find it very calming, or at the very least a good time to reflect and think through things.

 

YESS SPEECH YES YES 

*hugs*

I do the same thing. I love the stars. And music. And both at the same time.

I like to pretend im flying around in the sky and nothing matters except me and the sky. Or do my mind movies

[Mags she/they]

2 minutes ago, That1Cellist said:

Dang, that's a lot.

* hugs for thee * 

Being alive is definitely an experience, isn't it? Or I guess it's that the only experience is being alive. Either way, it is most peculiar.

  Hide contents

On a little bit more serious of a note, do you listen to music a lot? When I'm really having a tough time, I use music as an outlet for my emotions, whether it's playing or listening to it. It's really helpful for me.

Another thing that I do is just lay on the ground and stare at the ceiling. I know it sounds stupid, but it's actually very calming if you do it in a quiet place where you can just sit and think. Bonus points for playing music at the same time, and even more for doing it outside while looking at the stars. I find it very calming, or at the very least a good time to reflect and think through things.

 

Spoiler

I also highly recommend laying on the ground, it's a legitimate yoga/meditation practice and it really helps. I recommend putting calm meditation music on at the same time.

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

1 hour ago, Hawks said:

Ope

chelly!!!!

*hugs* 

I recommend getting some

Sometimes it’s an about finding the right one. There are a lot of crap therapist out there

 

ok here to rant abt something

tw suicide 

 

 

  Hide contents

well…. Last night was rough. But to sum it up. Talking with dad about lgbtq stuff, turned into an argument turned into be running out of my house literally having a mental breakdown. And the rough part was some of the bs things he said like how it’s satans way of tearing the family apart. I think he forgot we are literally going through a divorce. Yes dad tell me my identity is tearing family’s apart as this is happening. Anyways i started crying he continued bringing up sewerslide rates among trans and guys and like i was swerlisdal as a girl i will be as a boy storm off slontze. And it spiraled and i almost didnt go home but i had to bc i was tired. Eventually i fell asleep and now im so tired i actually fell asleep in class somehow. Five times.

later he apologized and said when i can find it in my heart i  can forgive him for being a [redacted] dad my whole life then i can. 

Tbh i dont think i can. Him and my mom stormed everything up for me and regardless if they changed or not the past is still written deep in my bones. I just wanna sleep and not wake up bro

special thanks to @whirte (still cant tag grr) for helping me a little and @Through The Living Glass abd @Dabi for staying on the phone with me half the night. You’re all the bestest ever. And I couldn’t be more happy to have you as friends 

I could use hugs please

*hugs* I’m sorry *hugs* we love you forever and always no matter what

[𝖂𝖍𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖊]

3 hours ago, Mag said:

I was actually kinda thinking about this yesterday, because I also feel really ugly even though most people tell me I look fine. Just saying 'oh you look fine!' doesn't really mean much, because people will say that either way in my experience (and no hate to them, they're just being polite). 

That's not to say you are ugly, beauty is subjective and different for everyone. I personally think you look great, you like kind and healthy.

I think the thing that has helped me most was trying to shift my focus on what I can't do to what I can. I can't fix some of the facial features I'm insecure about, but I can grow out my hair so I like it more. I can't change how tall I am, but I can work for a healthier body that I feel more comfortable in. I can't get rid of my eczema, but I can wear clothes that fit me and that I like. Obviously, that's easier said then done, and I suck at it, but it does help.

And of course I could go on a rant about how beauty isn't everything, but I'm sure you've heard it somewhere before. Just remember that you're worth as a human has nothing to do with what you look like--that and being a kind, friendly person can often override how you look.

Also this might just be me, so take it with a grain of salt, but I don't really look at peoples faces that much? I have a hard time doing eye contact about half of the time (suspected autism yayyy)  so peoples faces are mostly just a blend of their strongest features and usual expression in my memory. I don't really look closely enough to notice flaws, certainly not as close as I look at my own face in the mirror.

I know you mentioned the acne, so I'll be honest and say that most of the time I don't notice it on people. Maybe it's because I'm a teenager, so I just see it a lot, but I don't really register it as something separate from someones skin. They're just like freckles, y'know? They just sort of blend in to people. We always overestimate how much people are looking at us, and judging how we look. Most of the time, people are focusing on the way your face is moving so they can read your expression and body language, then focusing on what your face actually looks like. Maybe that's just me?

At the very least, if someone does focus on your appearance more then your actions, then they're a weirdo who doesn't deserve your time.

That's it for my half awake ramblings  I hope you have a great day *hugs*

Me  Cellist, dreading our summer jobs

Honestly, the state of the future sucks and I don't know what to say that will help you feel more hope. I guess, I'm trying not to dread this summer by focusing in the stuff I will get to do in my free time. I have a ton of hobbies I want to work on, and having a job to fund them is gonna be great, even if the actual job sucks.

The world is really awful right now, but the sun still shines in the morning and that's pretty cool. I like making little things with my hands to hang around my room because they help cheer me up.

Also this is gonna sound weird, but I know vague advice is less then helpful, so here's a stupid tip: watching shows meant for kids in your free time is awesome. It gives your brain a nice break from the complicated dark stuff, and it takes you back to a time when you were less stressed. I've been watching a minecraft smp (an unproblematic one don't worry) and it really helps me. Do with that what you will, I don't pretend to know what I'm doing lol 

*hugs*

This is one of the most mature and insightful posts I have seen on the shard. I can't agree more.

Also.

Welcome to the autism club! *spins on barstool for 2 straight hours*

[That1Cellist he/him]

17 minutes ago, 𝖂𝖍𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖊 said:

This is one of the most mature and insightful posts I have seen on the shard. I can't agree more.

Also.

Welcome to the autism club! *spins on barstool for 2 straight hours*

Nah bro I'm neurotypical trust.

No autism or other neurodiversity here.

I am normal

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

hey

yeah i'm here

xuvoicyxbviuweasfkdjhgaa;ljsdfeq 

i'm very useless

stayed up until 12 am mostly to punish myself for not doing important things all day and wrote 1000 words and finished the rough draft but I feel bad because one of my sons stayed up with me but I feel awful about that because what kind of fake mother lets her son do that when he has to wake up super early to go to work 

;adfsioj and then I always tell everyone I'd never actually commit but I find myself angry at that fact and I try and hold my breath until I black out and then I'm mad when I don't have the willpower and I also find myself at twelve with a headache having eaten or drank nothing and I wonder how long I could go before I eat something but I guess i'm not close enough because I always end up eating something 

I'm just tired

I've done nothing today

I freaking hate myself 

I want a speeding semi truck for my birthday 

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

3 minutes ago, Bird Furious said:

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

hey

yeah i'm here

xuvoicyxbviuweasfkdjhgaa;ljsdfeq 

i'm very useless

stayed up until 12 am mostly to punish myself for not doing important things all day and wrote 1000 words and finished the rough draft but I feel bad because one of my sons stayed up with me but I feel awful about that because what kind of fake mother lets her son do that when he has to wake up super early to go to work 

;adfsioj and then I always tell everyone I'd never actually commit but I find myself angry at that fact and I try and hold my breath until I black out and then I'm mad when I don't have the willpower and I also find myself at twelve with a headache having eaten or drank nothing and I wonder how long I could go before I eat something but I guess i'm not close enough because I always end up eating something 

I'm just tired

I've done nothing today

I freaking hate myself 

I want a speeding semi truck for my birthday 

*HUGS*

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

5 minutes ago, Bird Furious said:

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

hey

yeah i'm here

xuvoicyxbviuweasfkdjhgaa;ljsdfeq 

i'm very useless

stayed up until 12 am mostly to punish myself for not doing important things all day and wrote 1000 words and finished the rough draft but I feel bad because one of my sons stayed up with me but I feel awful about that because what kind of fake mother lets her son do that when he has to wake up super early to go to work 

;adfsioj and then I always tell everyone I'd never actually commit but I find myself angry at that fact and I try and hold my breath until I black out and then I'm mad when I don't have the willpower and I also find myself at twelve with a headache having eaten or drank nothing and I wonder how long I could go before I eat something but I guess i'm not close enough because I always end up eating something 

I'm just tired

I've done nothing today

I freaking hate myself 

I want a speeding semi truck for my birthday 

*hug*

haly

[Through the Living Hope]

9 minutes ago, Bird Furious said:

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

hey

yeah i'm here

xuvoicyxbviuweasfkdjhgaa;ljsdfeq 

i'm very useless

stayed up until 12 am mostly to punish myself for not doing important things all day and wrote 1000 words and finished the rough draft but I feel bad because one of my sons stayed up with me but I feel awful about that because what kind of fake mother lets her son do that when he has to wake up super early to go to work 

;adfsioj and then I always tell everyone I'd never actually commit but I find myself angry at that fact and I try and hold my breath until I black out and then I'm mad when I don't have the willpower and I also find myself at twelve with a headache having eaten or drank nothing and I wonder how long I could go before I eat something but I guess i'm not close enough because I always end up eating something 

I'm just tired

I've done nothing today

I freaking hate myself 

I want a speeding semi truck for my birthday 

*hug*  

[Mags she/they]

1 hour ago, 𝖂𝖍𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖊 said:

This is one of the most mature and insightful posts I have seen on the shard. I can't agree more.

Also.

Welcome to the autism club! *spins on barstool for 2 straight hours*

thanks!

Spoiler

DOn't welcome me I'm not diagnosed . . . it might just be the (also undiagnosed) mental illness . . .

Edited May 13, 2025 by Mag

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

2 hours ago, Bird Furious said:

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

hey

yeah i'm here

xuvoicyxbviuweasfkdjhgaa;ljsdfeq 

i'm very useless

stayed up until 12 am mostly to punish myself for not doing important things all day and wrote 1000 words and finished the rough draft but I feel bad because one of my sons stayed up with me but I feel awful about that because what kind of fake mother lets her son do that when he has to wake up super early to go to work 

;adfsioj and then I always tell everyone I'd never actually commit but I find myself angry at that fact and I try and hold my breath until I black out and then I'm mad when I don't have the willpower and I also find myself at twelve with a headache having eaten or drank nothing and I wonder how long I could go before I eat something but I guess i'm not close enough because I always end up eating something 

I'm just tired

I've done nothing today

I freaking hate myself 

I want a speeding semi truck for my birthday 

I’m sure your not useless 

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

26 minutes ago, Heřãłðøfľõvê said:

I’m sure your not useless 

I’m very useless

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

6 minutes ago, Bird Furious said:

I’m very useless

No, you're not. Herald is right. Listen to him.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

9 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

No, you're not. Herald is right. Listen to him.

He’s not, though. And neither are you. 

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

Just now, Bird Furious said:

He’s not, though. And neither are you. 

Examples what are some examples of you being useless

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

4 minutes ago, Bird Furious said:

He’s not, though. And neither are you. 

Haly, we are. We're not lying.

Have I ever lied to you before? I'm not just saying that

[Through the Living Hope]

6 minutes ago, Bird Furious said:

He’s not, though. And neither are you. 

Haly, you’re not useless you bring so much joy to people’s lives 

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

2 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

Haly, you’re not useless you bring so much joy to people’s lives 

This true

[Hoid Slayer He/Him]

17 hours ago, That1Cellist said:

Depression has really been going at it lately. To be fair, I suppose that's mostly my own fault, since I'm having trouble keeping up on schoolwork, I waste too much, time, and I stay up to late.

My eyes hurt. It's not pleasant.

Also not looking forward to getting a summer job. I mean, making money is nice, but having commitments and having to go places, even if it isn't that long, is still rather uncomfortable, especially since I'll be taking precious time out of my summer to do it.

Oh well, it's supposedly and most likely good for me, I guess. Plus, my whole life will be like that in the future, except it will be all day instead of a couple hours. I might as well try to get used to it.

huzzah

doesn't it seem like so much fun to live?

*hugs*

6 hours ago, Mag said:

I was actually kinda thinking about this yesterday, because I also feel really ugly even though most people tell me I look fine. Just saying 'oh you look fine!' doesn't really mean much, because people will say that either way in my experience (and no hate to them, they're just being polite). 

That's not to say you are ugly, beauty is subjective and different for everyone. I personally think you look great, you like kind and healthy.

I think the thing that has helped me most was trying to shift my focus on what I can't do to what I can. I can't fix some of the facial features I'm insecure about, but I can grow out my hair so I like it more. I can't change how tall I am, but I can work for a healthier body that I feel more comfortable in. I can't get rid of my eczema, but I can wear clothes that fit me and that I like. Obviously, that's easier said then done, and I suck at it, but it does help.

And of course I could go on a rant about how beauty isn't everything, but I'm sure you've heard it somewhere before. Just remember that you're worth as a human has nothing to do with what you look like--that and being a kind, friendly person can often override how you look.

Also this might just be me, so take it with a grain of salt, but I don't really look at peoples faces that much? I have a hard time doing eye contact about half of the time (suspected autism yayyy)  so peoples faces are mostly just a blend of their strongest features and usual expression in my memory. I don't really look closely enough to notice flaws, certainly not as close as I look at my own face in the mirror.

I know you mentioned the acne, so I'll be honest and say that most of the time I don't notice it on people. Maybe it's because I'm a teenager, so I just see it a lot, but I don't really register it as something separate from someones skin. They're just like freckles, y'know? They just sort of blend in to people. We always overestimate how much people are looking at us, and judging how we look. Most of the time, people are focusing on the way your face is moving so they can read your expression and body language, then focusing on what your face actually looks like. Maybe that's just me?

At the very least, if someone does focus on your appearance more then your actions, then they're a weirdo who doesn't deserve your time.

That's it for my half awake ramblings  I hope you have a great day *hugs*

Me  Cellist, dreading our summer jobs

Honestly, the state of the future sucks and I don't know what to say that will help you feel more hope. I guess, I'm trying not to dread this summer by focusing in the stuff I will get to do in my free time. I have a ton of hobbies I want to work on, and having a job to fund them is gonna be great, even if the actual job sucks.

The world is really awful right now, but the sun still shines in the morning and that's pretty cool. I like making little things with my hands to hang around my room because they help cheer me up.

Also this is gonna sound weird, but I know vague advice is less then helpful, so here's a stupid tip: watching shows meant for kids in your free time is awesome. It gives your brain a nice break from the complicated dark stuff, and it takes you back to a time when you were less stressed. I've been watching a minecraft smp (an unproblematic one don't worry) and it really helps me. Do with that what you will, I don't pretend to know what I'm doing lol 

*hugs*

*more hugs*

5 hours ago, That1Cellist said:

Dang, that's a lot.

* hugs for thee * 

Being alive is definitely an experience, isn't it? Or I guess it's that the only experience is being alive. Either way, it is most peculiar.

  Hide contents

On a little bit more serious of a note, do you listen to music a lot? When I'm really having a tough time, I use music as an outlet for my emotions, whether it's playing or listening to it. It's really helpful for me.

Another thing that I do is just lay on the ground and stare at the ceiling. I know it sounds stupid, but it's actually very calming if you do it in a quiet place where you can just sit and think. Bonus points for playing music at the same time, and even more for doing it outside while looking at the stars. I find it very calming, or at the very least a good time to reflect and think through things.

 

YES. MUSIC.

Afterwards, though, it feels like reality hits you like a punch to the gut.

3 hours ago, Bird Furious said:

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

hey

yeah i'm here

xuvoicyxbviuweasfkdjhgaa;ljsdfeq 

i'm very useless

stayed up until 12 am mostly to punish myself for not doing important things all day and wrote 1000 words and finished the rough draft but I feel bad because one of my sons stayed up with me but I feel awful about that because what kind of fake mother lets her son do that when he has to wake up super early to go to work 

;adfsioj and then I always tell everyone I'd never actually commit but I find myself angry at that fact and I try and hold my breath until I black out and then I'm mad when I don't have the willpower and I also find myself at twelve with a headache having eaten or drank nothing and I wonder how long I could go before I eat something but I guess i'm not close enough because I always end up eating something 

I'm just tired

I've done nothing today

I freaking hate myself 

I want a speeding semi truck for my birthday 

Hey

*infinite hugs*

I can't offer much advice right now.

But you are not useless.

You are awesome.

You're wonderful.

I hate myself too. All the time. But I know other people don't. So stick around for them. And for who you could be.

 

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

1 minute ago, Hoid Slayer said:

*hugs*

*more hugs*

YES. MUSIC.

Afterwards, though, it feels like reality hits you like a punch to the gut.

Hey

*infinite hugs*

I can't offer much advice right now.

But you are not useless.

You are awesome.

You're wonderful.

I hate myself too. All the time. But I know other people don't. So stick around for them. And for who you could be.

 

Goodness yah I don’t think I’ve ever heard anything worded that well in times where it sucks and you hate who you are remind yourself of the people who love you and of al that you do for them

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

13 minutes ago, Heřãłðøfľõvê said:

Examples what are some examples of you being useless

I’ve gotten nothing done today

9 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

Haly, we are. We're not lying.

Have I ever lied to you before? I'm not just saying that

Not that I know of 

7 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

Haly, you’re not useless you bring so much joy to people’s lives 

4 minutes ago, Hoid Slayer said:

*hugs*

*more hugs*

YES. MUSIC.

Afterwards, though, it feels like reality hits you like a punch to the gut.

Hey

*infinite hugs*

I can't offer much advice right now.

But you are not useless.

You are awesome.

You're wonderful.

I hate myself too. All the time. But I know other people don't. So stick around for them. And for who you could be.

 

You’re telling me to keep putting myself through hell just for the people around me

you realize that, right?

[Through the Living Hope]

1 minute ago, Bird Furious said:

I’ve gotten nothing done today

Not that I know of 

You’re telling me to keep putting myself through hell just for the people around me

you realize that, right?

Haly, you are strong, and things will get better. Just because a puzzle piece can’t find its place on its own doesn’t make it useless. Missing one piece makes the whole puzzle so much worse