Mental health club!

[Hoid Slayer He/Him]

1 hour ago, Kaladin Stormcursed said:

Why are friends so storming hard? Why are they so helpful and still have such ability to hurt? Why do I get snapped at when I talk about my problems, but they expect me to understand theirs? Why do I always have to wonder which friends are actually my friends and which are using me? Why can't I help my friends? Why won't they tell me what's going on so I can help? Why can't they tell me so I can be there for them more or in the right way? Why can't I be good with words? Why do I always mess up everything I try to say? Why do so many people look up to me, when I can't even go a week without hating myself? Why am I like an addict for self-punishment? Why can't I even be there for myself? Why can't I have the answers? Why am I so messed up?

*hugs*

I don’t know.

But it isn’t your fault.

It isn’t really anyone’s.

I know how friends can be hard. But maybe, just maybe, they face similar dilemmas.

Or maybe they don’t, and you need to stop holding yourself to their unfair standards.

Cause you’re awesome the way you are.

[#1 Taln Fan he/him]

Mental health adjacent but also kinda long and rambly, so check out my blog post if you wanna read my recent ramble about stuff 

[Through the Living Hope]

So

Yeah

Not taking the AP test

Oh well

[Keke They/he]

29 minutes ago, #1 Taln Fan said:

Mental health adjacent but also kinda long and rambly, so check out my blog post if you wanna read my recent ramble about stuff 

Yeah people dont see those to much xD but I read it 

13 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

So

Yeah

Not taking the AP test

Oh well

Awww *hugs*

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

12 hours ago, Kaladin Stormcursed said:

Why are friends so storming hard? Why are they so helpful and still have such ability to hurt? Why do I get snapped at when I talk about my problems, but they expect me to understand theirs? Why do I always have to wonder which friends are actually my friends and which are using me? Why can't I help my friends? Why won't they tell me what's going on so I can help? Why can't they tell me so I can be there for them more or in the right way? Why can't I be good with words? Why do I always mess up everything I try to say? Why do so many people look up to me, when I can't even go a week without hating myself? Why am I like an addict for self-punishment? Why can't I even be there for myself? Why can't I have the answers? Why am I so messed up?

12 hours ago, Kaladin Stormcursed said:

No, it has to be.my fault. It doesn't make sense otherwise

It's not your fault. Are you perfect? No. But you don't owe them anything, k? It's not your fault if they decide you owe them something you can't give, or if they don't owe you anything despite everything you try to do for them. You should get new friends, I think. 

I agree with the others. You do need new friends. 

[Shatter He/Him]

28 minutes ago, Bird Furious said:

You do need new friends. 

@Kaladin Stormcursed We can be your friends online but you need to find people who see you for who you are

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

4 hours ago, #1 Taln Fan said:

Mental health adjacent but also kinda long and rambly, so check out my blog post if you wanna read my recent ramble about stuff 

*random hugs for no reason*

3 hours ago, Spark of Hope said:

So

Yeah

Not taking the AP test

Oh well

oh girl

*squeeze*

I'm so sorry

2 hours ago, The Shattered Cosmere said:

@Kaladin Stormcursed We can be your friends online but you need to find people who see you for who you are

I strongly second this

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

3 hours ago, Spark of Hope said:

So

Yeah

Not taking the AP test

Oh well

Gosh I’m rly sorry *huggss*

[Through the Living Hope]

7 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*random hugs for no reason*

oh girl

*squeeze*

I'm so sorry

I strongly second this

 

4 minutes ago, Heřãłðøfľõvê said:

Gosh I’m rly sorry *huggss*

Thanks guys

[Cash67]

4 hours ago, #1 Taln Fan said:

Mental health adjacent but also kinda long and rambly, so check out my blog post if you wanna read my recent ramble about stuff 

Yeah I agree with a lot of that. Good work and keep it up!

4 hours ago, Spark of Hope said:

So

Yeah

Not taking the AP test

Oh well

ummm... dumb question but you OK?

[Through the Living Hope]

Just now, Cash67 said:

Yeah I agree with a lot of that. Good work and keep it up!

ummm... dumb question but you OK?

Yeah

It's just government and politics is kinda boring and I don't want to have to take it again to get credit for it lol

[Keke They/he]

Good news 

Spoiler

im not gonna be left!!!

[Through the Living Hope]

1 minute ago, Hawks said:

Good news 

  Reveal hidden contents

im not gonna be left!!!

YAY!

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

37 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

 

Thanks guys

33 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

Yeah

It's just government and politics is kinda boring and I don't want to have to take it again to get credit for it lol

*squeezes so tightly*

28 minutes ago, Hawks said:

Good news 

  Hide contents

im not gonna be left!!!

AWESOME!

[Keke They/he]

43 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

YAY!

 

15 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*squeezes so tightly*

AWESOME!

*squeel and jumps*

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

50 minutes ago, Hawks said:

Good news 

  Reveal hidden contents

im not gonna be left!!!

Yay!

[Hoid Slayer He/Him]

5 hours ago, Spark of Hope said:

So

Yeah

Not taking the AP test

Oh well

Just saw this

*hugs*

sorry

57 minutes ago, Hawks said:

Good news 

  Hide contents

im not gonna be left!!!

AWESOME!

[Shatter He/Him]

For everyone wh hasn't seen my SU:

Quote

Ok. I'm back. Still banned from the computer at home, so... yeah.

Okay. Let's get into it.

Extended Needs Service

Spoiler

Ok. It's like a governmental program for minors with special needs. Here's what it says on its website:

“The Extensive Needs Service is a program that provides vital wrap-around services for children and youth with urgent and extensive needs in Ontario who have co-occurring urgent medical, physical and developmental complexities and/or social vulnerabilities. This integrated pathway helps streamline the process for children and families to access help in support of optimal health outcomes. The service is designed to reduce barriers to accessing timely, evidence-based, and trauma-informed treatment for some of the most vulnerable children in Ontario. This program is funded by Ontario’s Ministry of Health and the Ministry of Children, Community, and Social Services.”

Thing is, I'm almost 17 and a half. I'm gonna age out soon. I'm going to get transferred to a program for adults. I had my first meeting and I think it went well and was productive. 

I think I'm going to be transferred to Developmental Services Ontario, which does the same thing but for adults. I hate being treated like a child. I have very high-functioning autism and ADHD, but I'm too high functioning. I slip through the cracks in the Canadian healthcare system.

Mental Breakdown

Warning: Suicidal Thoughts

Spoiler

I had a really, really bad mental breakdown two nights ago. Just thinking, y'know, the usual. I'm useless. Nobody cares. I have nothing. No place. I am worthless. Somehow, I went to sleep but I'm still in that frame of mind, so yeah…

SH

Warning: Sh

Spoiler

I've learned that I do do self harm. I hit myself and pull my hair and hurt myself. I just hate this. Why?

I'm breaking down quickly. I'm calling 988.

 

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

5 minutes ago, The Shattered Cosmere said:

For everyone wh hasn't seen my SU:

 

*squeezes so hard*

How'd the call go?

[Hoid Slayer He/Him]

6 minutes ago, The Shattered Cosmere said:

For everyone wh hasn't seen my SU:

 

*hugs*

I don't know how to help you out.

But you ARE worth something.

And you shouldn't be afraid to get help.

[Existential]

7 minutes ago, The Shattered Cosmere said:

For everyone wh hasn't seen my SU:

 

*hugs*

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

2 hours ago, The Shattered Cosmere said:

For everyone wh hasn't seen my SU:

 

*hugs*

I'll say this again here: PM's are always open to anyone for ANYTHING

[KnightSkye Reforged They/Them]

On 4/26/2025 at 6:29 PM, Bird Furious said:

*sigh*

when you're at your lowest and really need to talk to someone, suddenly everything goes silent 

and everyone's either got their own issues or they're away at their prom or whatever else

I hate needing people. I hate people. Why can't I just be a feelingless, emotionless rock? 

*hugs*

I know it's not the same as in person, but we were here. This group. We care.

The emotions hurt. And you will hate them sometimes. But life is better with them than without. I promise.

On 4/26/2025 at 11:16 PM, Bird Furious said:

It's a net negative

so

I love that whole album

Listened to it twice today

Still wish I were a rock 

The good times honestly just aren't worth it 

I feel that a lot 

a lot 

Honestly, I live for three things 

1. I'm religious, so I live because if I don't God would be mad at me 

2. If I were to die, I'd probably traumatize a lot of people. Wish I didn't know so many people 

3. The thin, threadbare, ever wanting hope that I'll be happy someday 

I used to live for people, before I realized that everyone abandons you

However ardently they promise to stick by you, ultimately they always have other things to look after because they're tryna live their lives and you just don't fit into that anymore 

as it should be

but living for people hurts every time you move or when they cut ties with you 

I've been subconsciously looking for something else to live for ever since while also creating emotional distance between everyone I know

but every so often, somebody closes the gap somehow 

every so often, I get burned again

so, yeah, I don't know 

Oh Haly *HUGS* I know these feelings so well. Living your life for the people around you cause you can't really see a point to living otherwise, just to have person after person abandon you, attack you, and leave you burned and broken. And you feel pathetic lying there, and more pathetic when you find someone new, cause of course it's just going to happen again, and you know, know, that people are all just as worthless as you and no one cares about anyone else, and they will all leave you in the end, broken and bleeding, and they won't care. 

So you try to keep yourself safe. You push others away, burn them before they can burn you. You know they will leave, so you make damn sure they leave on your terms. So you know why they are leaving.

That was my life for years. Just barely not dying cause there were a few people who I cared about, who I didn't want to make cry.

*hug*

There will be people worth knowing. There will be people who stay. There are people out there who value their friends more than their lives. 

I know. I met someone like that, and she helped save me. And I want there to be more people like that in the world, so I became someone like that. 

I know most people are hard to be around. I know so many of them don't actually mean what they say.

Haly, I have promised to stay. I have said I am your friend. So I will and I am. Not just, "I'm your friend until it gets inconvenient" not, "I will stay till it gets to hard."

I will not leave. I promise. 

*hugs*

I'm sorry it hurts so much right now.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

35 minutes ago, KnightSkye said:

*hugs*

I know it's not the same as in person, but we were here. This group. We care.

The emotions hurt. And you will hate them sometimes. But life is better with them than without. I promise.

Oh Haly *HUGS* I know these feelings so well. Living your life for the people around you cause you can't really see a point to living otherwise, just to have person after person abandon you, attack you, and leave you burned and broken. And you feel pathetic lying there, and more pathetic when you find someone new, cause of course it's just going to happen again, and you know, know, that people are all just as worthless as you and no one cares about anyone else, and they will all leave you in the end, broken and bleeding, and they won't care. 

So you try to keep yourself safe. You push others away, burn them before they can burn you. You know they will leave, so you make damn sure they leave on your terms. So you know why they are leaving.

That was my life for years. Just barely not dying cause there were a few people who I cared about, who I didn't want to make cry.

*hug*

There will be people worth knowing. There will be people who stay. There are people out there who value their friends more than their lives. 

I know. I met someone like that, and she helped save me. And I want there to be more people like that in the world, so I became someone like that. 

I know most people are hard to be around. I know so many of them don't actually mean what they say.

Haly, I have promised to stay. I have said I am your friend. So I will and I am. Not just, "I'm your friend until it gets inconvenient" not, "I will stay till it gets to hard."

I will not leave. I promise. 

*hugs*

I'm sorry it hurts so much right now.

Thank you.  

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

3 hours ago, The Shattered Cosmere said:

For everyone wh hasn't seen my SU:

 

*hugs*

Hey! U! U are awesome. Completely awesome. See here it says so.
*You are awesome*
I mean it - you’ve been cool to interact with.

*hugs*

4 hours ago, Hawks said:

Good news 

  Reveal hidden contents

im not gonna be left!!!

*claps*
Happy!

*claps!*