Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[Darkness Ascendant he/him]

Granted. You get a horiiblereleerer burden of guilt

 

I wish to become a unicorn. A peasant one of course.

[Pathfinder]

Granted. You get a horiiblereleerer burden of guilt

 

I wish to become a unicorn. A peasant one of course.

Granted, you are a unicorn that has to work on a farm as a peasant

 

Guess someone doesn't want to see Sanderson become popular since that post got downvoted, but ah well.

 

I wish to have an elsecaller spren with all the powers it has, but can be fueled by electricty

[Bugsy he/him]

Granted, you are a unicorn that has to work on a farm as a peasant

 

Guess someone doesn't want to see Sanderson become popular since that post got downvoted, but ah well.

 

I wish to have an elsecaller spren with all the powers it has, but can be fueled by electricty

Granted, but it escapes and bonds with your least favorite person.

I wish that the snow in my yard would melt

[Cephandrius]

Granted.  But that's because they were melted by rainwater from the two highstorms and an everstorm colliding in your yard.  

 

I wish I were a voidspren.

[Farnsworth]

Granted, but it is your member reputation rating on 17th shard (-25 to -99).

 

I wish that I had unlimited access to delicious food.

Edited March 4, 2016 by Figberts

[Rasarr she/her]

Granted. You can see all the possible futures, and you don't know which one will come to pass.

 

I wish to be able to speak perfect Japanese, without losing the ability to speak any other language I already know.

Edited March 4, 2016 by Rasarr

[Brightness Enna she/her]

Granted. You speak all the languages perfectly now and cannot discern which language to speak to which person in which area of the world.

 

I wish for some good lunch right now.

[Observer]

Sure thing. You now have to eat that meal for the rest of your life. No other food will sustain you.

No other liquids either. You'll have to depend on the water inside of the meal you've chosen. 

You will eat.

You will eat until you are your hunger is SATED.

You will keep eating until your thirst is QUENCHED.

YOU. WILL. EAT.

 

On a related note, I wish that I didn't need to eat or drink and never felt the need.

[Farnsworth]

Granted. Without the wondrous miracle of delicious tasting food to sustain you and preserve you throughout life, you become extremely bored with everything.

 

I wish I could discover the meaning of life.

[AnikoliNightmareVision she/her]

Granted. You die 1 second after you find out.

I wish to live somewhere else.

[CarolaDavar she/her]

Granted. You now live on the SHattered Plains. You are forced to go on Bridge Runs every day.

I wish to have awesome drawing skills

[Jondesu he/him]

Granted. You die 1 second after you find out.

I wish to live somewhere else.

Granted. You now live in an alternate dimension where the deserts of Australia, where you've now been moved to, look and feel exactly like where you live currently, but no one there is willing to look at or talk to you. Ever.

I wish I could sing better.

[Observer]

Granted. But you will always sound horrible to yourself, one a level far surpassing nails on a chalkboard, depriving the enjoyment from the act.

 

I wish my novel was finished.

[CarolaDavar she/her]

Granted. But you will always sound horrible to yourself, one a level far surpassing nails on a chalkboard, depriving the enjoyment from the act.

 

I wish my novel was finished.

Granted. But, the ending is terrifying. The main character(s) die. So do most of the side characters.

I wish I had an infinite supply of cake

[AnikoliNightmareVision she/her]

Granted. But you got cookies instead of cake because nightwatcher thinks you deserve that. And you know what the cookies are like.

I wish I can bond a cryptospren.

[CarolaDavar she/her]

Granted. It doesn't givve you any powers, though, and your spren is SUPER annoying.

I wish i had a bead of Lerasium

[Observer]

Granted. But, the ending is terrifying. The main character(s) die. So do most of the side characters.

 

Oh, well, that was the plan already. Sweet, free wish.

 

"I wish I can bond a cryptospren."

Sure. This is only possible on Roshar, so now you're there too. Enjoy the life of a fantasy hero that is far more horrifying and dangerous than you imagined, risking your life every day on a foreign world saving people you don't even know with no hope of returning home.

 

i wish for technopathy.

[CarolaDavar she/her]

What about MY wish?

[AnikoliNightmareVision she/her]

Your wish is granted Carola. Hoid stoles that lerasium from you.

I wish to have an infinite library

[AnikoliNightmareVision she/her]

"I wish I can bond a cryptospren."

Sure. This is only possible on Roshar, so now you're there too. Enjoy the life of a fantasy hero that is far more horrifying and dangerous than you imagined, risking your life every day on a foreign world saving people you don't even know with no hope of returning home.

that was exacly what I wished, thank you!

[CarolaDavar she/her]

Granted. Non of the books are fiction, though.

I wish that i owned a Shardblade

Edited March 4, 2016 by CarolaDavar

[Jondesu he/him]

Granted. It doesn't givve you any powers, though, and your spren is SUPER annoying.

I wish i had a bead of Lerasium

Since you got skipped (due to double answers):

Granted, but you immediately lose it and can't remember where. You also are never again able to walk in a straight line.

For your other one, same answer (you wouldn't have had time the bond it, so no summoning it back). :-P

I wish I was permanently healthy.

Edited March 4, 2016 by Jondesu

[AnikoliNightmareVision she/her]

Granted. Non of the books are fiction, though.

I wish that i owned a Shardblade

oh, storms, you tricked me so well!

[Citadel16 he/him]

Granted. Non of the books are fiction, though.

I wish that i owned a Shardblade

granted. you are so unbalanced on your feet that swinging it would kill you.

 

Since you got skipped (due to double answers):

Granted, but you immediately lose it and can't remember where. You also are never again able to walk in a straight line.

For your other one, same answer (you wouldn't have had time the bond it, so no summoning it back). :-P

I wish I was permanently healthy.

granted. you die and are Returned and must live off of investiture for the rest of your long life (or short, because earth isn't cosmere)

 

 

I wish for unparalleled writing skills with no negative side effects in any way shape or form.

[AnikoliNightmareVision she/her]

I wish I was permanently healthy.

granted, you die healthy with the knife in your heart.

I wish to eat right now some spagetti carbonara