Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[Magestar he/him]

Granted, Brandon asks you, personally, to be a beta reader.  Your bane;  You forget how to read, and must relearn this.  By the time you learn it again, everyone has a copy of the book. (Or so many people that being a beta tester no longer matters.  Accept for the prestige, of course.)

 

I wish to have a secret, giant library, so big, that it warps L-Space.  (Someone who has read Discworld had better answer this, or it will make no sense.)

[Renoux she/her]

Your wish is granted. I don't know exactly what it means... but, sure knock yourself out with your giant, secret, L-space warping library.

 

Your bane is that your library cannot contain any books by Brandon Sanderson.

 

I wish that I could own all books written by Brandon Sanderson, purchased my an anonymous donor, (legally), who also payed to get me out of jail and the insane asylum. 

[Straw he/him]

Wish granted. You lose all of your senses.

I wish to be a member of a suspiciously suspicious conspiracy.

[Magestar he/him]

Your wish is granted. I don't know exactly what it means... but, sure knock yourself out with your giant, secret, L-space warping library.

 

Your bane is that your library cannot contain any books by Brandon Sanderson.

You obviously do not understand L-Space...  Why me?  

 

Eh-Hem. Anyway...

 

I wish to be a member of a suspiciously suspicious conspiracy.

 

 

Done.  Not sure why you would ask for that.  But there, you are now a member of a suspiciously suspicous conspiracy.

 

Your bane;  You have an extremely difficult time keeping a secret.  Good luck with that.

 

I wish to have a life-long supply of Bananas, just in case.

[Rasarr she/her]

Granted. Every day, ten bananas will spontaneously manifest behind you at exactly 10:03 AM, London time. As your bane, every time you see colour yellow, you start to hear voices of Despicable Me's Minions chattering incessantly into your ear. 

 

I wish for a pair of sunglasses.

[WayneSpren he/him]

The nightwatcher grants your request. The sun now has glasses. He thanks you for your generosity.

 

I wish to be a stick.

[KnightRadiant she/her]

Granted, only now you cannot change back. In fact, you can only change into fire, and that only very reluctantly.

 

I wish to be able to speak and understand all known languages. 

 

 

(Whoops, grammar accidents)

Edited June 1, 2016 by KnightRadiant

[hoidhunter he/him]

You obviously do not understand L-Space...  Why me?  

 

Eh-Hem. Anyway...

 

 

 

Done.  Not sure why you would ask for that.  But there, you are now a member of a suspiciously suspicous conspiracy.

 

Your bane;  You have an extremely difficult time keeping a secret.  Good luck with that.

 

I wish to have a life-long supply of Bananas, just in case.

I know this one was already done...but...I really want to address this...

 

Granted, There are now 16 tons of perfectly fresh bananas on your lawn...they will be bad within days...

[Renoux she/her]

You had no wish! As punishment,  you get 16 tons of perfectly fresh bananas on your lawn!

 

Good luck explaining it to the authorities, who are utterly baffled as to how 16 tons of bananas disappeared from the I.I.O.B. ,(International Institute Of Bananas), and ended up on your lawn.

 

 

My wish is for a iTunes giftcard worth 30 United States dollars. (Notice how I said United States dollars, not just US or dollars, and how my wish is not earth shattering or potentally criminal. Being careful here.)

Edited June 2, 2016 by Renoux

[Magestar he/him]

I wish to be able to speak and understand all known languages. 

Guys, be more careful.  We skipped this guy!  

 

Your wish is granted.  You now speak all known languages.  At the same time.  You also understand all known languages.  Your bane?  The night watcher decides to go easy on you, considering the poor phrasing of your request.  You now smell like very ripe bananas.  This is not always bad, as some people like how bananas smell.  I suppose.

 

 

My wish is for a iTunes giftcard worth 30 United States dollars. (Notice how I said United States dollars, not just US or dollars, and how my wish is not earth shattering or potentally criminal. Being careful here.)

You get it.  Your bane is that you are transported to Moscow, Russia, and have ONLY that gift card.  You have a vague air of untrustworthiness about you, as well.  Have fun getting back.

 

My Extra-Large wish, for granting to wishes, is that I am named heir of Warren Buffet, and gain Allomantic Zinc, and Feruchemical Zinc and Copper.

[kenod]

Guys, be more careful.  We skipped this guy!  

 

Your wish is granted.  You now speak all known languages.  At the same time.  You also understand all known languages.  Your bane?  The night watcher decides to go easy on you, considering the poor phrasing of your request.  You now smell like very ripe bananas.  This is not always bad, as some people like how bananas smell.  I suppose.

 

 

You get it.  Your bane is that you are transported to Moscow, Russia, and have ONLY that gift card.  You have a vague air of untrustworthiness about you, as well.  Have fun getting back.

 

My Extra-Large wish, for granting to wishes, is that I am named heir of Warren Buffet, and gain Allomantic Zinc, and Feruchemical Zinc and Copper.

 

Your wish is granted, but to get the powers the Nightwatcher had to Hemalurgically spike you, so now you have weird piercings. Your bane is that the government knows about how Hemalurgy works and that your spikes are Hemalurgic, so they are charging you with murder. They don't know about the Nightwatcher however, so have fun explaining it.

 

My wish is that it no longer rains in our country while it is daytime in our country. All the rain that should have fallen in the day should fall at night. Clouds are no problem, however.

[KnightGradient]

Your wish is granted, but to get the powers the Nightwatcher had to Hemalurgically spike you, so now you have weird piercings. Your bane is that the government knows about how Hemalurgy works and that your spikes are Hemalurgic, so they are charging you with murder. They don't know about the Nightwatcher however, so have fun explaining it.

 

My wish is that it no longer rains in our country while it is daytime in our country. All the rain that should have fallen in the day should fall at night. Clouds are no problem, however.

Granted. Everyone in your country now sunburns really easily.

 

I wish for highstorms to have been part of Earths' climate for the last billion years, and humans to still exist.

[WayneSpren he/him]

Your request is granted, but the human population has to adapted to slug-like invertebrates.

 

I wish to be a Pokemon master!

[KaIadin he/him]

Your request is granted, but the human population has to adapted to slug-like invertebrates.

 

I wish to be a Pokemon master!

Granted, but every time one of your pokemon starts evolving, you press b. Oh and you only have magikarps.

 

I want to be the very best.

[Sunbird she/her]

Granted. You are the very best... at hotdog-eating contests. Your bane is that everyone knows you as "that hotdog-eating champion" and you get mobbed by paparazzi everywhere you go.

 

I wish everywhere on Earth had free, fast wifi.

[Brightness Enna she/her]

Granted. You get free, fast wifi everywhere you go. That'll be nice for a few years, at least until wifi tech becomes obsolete.

 

Anytime you use a keyboard (pianos count, too), their keys turn neon orange. And start to smell like space oranges. That's like oranges only more sour and... not as good.

 

I wish for $90,000. (Money's a sadly common wish, but oh so useful.)

[KnightRadiant she/her]

Guys, be more careful.  We skipped this guy!  

 

Your wish is granted.  You now speak all known languages.  At the same time.  You also understand all known languages.  Your bane?  The night watcher decides to go easy on you, considering the poor phrasing of your request.  You now smell like very ripe bananas.  This is not always bad, as some people like how bananas smell.  I suppose.

 

 

You get it.  Your bane is that you are transported to Moscow, Russia, and have ONLY that gift card.  You have a vague air of untrustworthiness about you, as well.  Have fun getting back.

 

My Extra-Large wish, for granting to wishes, is that I am named heir of Warren Buffet, and gain Allomantic Zinc, and Feruchemical Zinc and Copper.

Thanks by the way. I was like:no! I must be invisible or something!So thanks for both proving to me that I am, in fact, not invisible, and making me smell like bananas. I need to thank you for that last one again, just because it's so great.

Anyway, to Brightness Enna, it won't let me quote again on this device, but your wish is granted. You now have $90,000, but your bane is that you are instantly transported to Scadrial during the Final Empire as a skaa worker. Good luck.

My wish is to have a cat.

[Magestar he/him]

Your bane is that the government knows about how Hemalurgy works and that your spikes are Hemalurgic, so they are charging you with murder. They don't know about the Nightwatcher however, so have fun explaining it.

 

Hey, my wish was to be made Warren Buffet's heir.  I'll pay my way out of this one.

 

My wish is to have a cat.

Your Wish is granted, you now not only have a cat, but you have the perfect cat, due to the nightwatcher being a perfectionist.  Your bane is that the Cat is a Catquisitor.  With spikes.

 

I wish for some ham.

[Renoux she/her]

You get some ham. Since your wish for "some" ham was slightly vague, you get 20 pounds of ham.

But that was not your bane, that was just your wish being granted.

 

Your bane is that it's all canned spam. (Which is ham, just dead ham).

 

 

I wish to be a Bendalloy Misting.

[Dracnor he/him]

I wish to be a Bendalloy Misting.

Granted. You now are a  Bendalloy Misting. As your bane, you developp a severe allergy against Bendalloy, a fatal one to be clear.

I wish for an canon lovestry between Hoid and Kelsier!

[Sunbird she/her]

Granted. However, Brandon likes to torture his readers, so he kills them both off (for good this time) shortly after they declare their love for each other.

 

I wish for the opportunity to meet the author Rick Riordan and get all my copies of his books signed.

[Arcoss]

Granted. However, Brandon likes to torture his readers, so he kills them both off (for good this time) shortly after they declare their love for each other.

 

I wish for the opportunity to meet the author Rick Riordan and get all my copies of his books signed.

Granted, Rick Riordan signs your books, then he kidnaps you and locks you in his basement with them

 

I wish the Nightwatcher to change her name to Daywatcher

[KnightRadiant she/her]

Granted. Anyway, the Nightwatcher changes her name to Day Watcher, but makes her middle name Night, and goes by that.

 

I ask for twenty, 100 gram, milk chocolate bars.

[KnightGradient]

Granted. Anyway, the Nightwatcher changes her name to Day Watcher, but makes her middle name Night, and goes by that.

 

I ask for twenty, 100 gram, milk chocolate bars.

Granted. The chocpocalypse starts immediately, and 90% of the world is transformed into a chocolate starved Marasi. Good Luck.

 

I wish for any phone I own to never run out of battery.

[ChullRider he/him]

Granted. The chocpocalypse starts immediately, and 90% of the world is transformed into a chocolate starved Marasi. Good Luck.

 

I wish for any phone I own to never run out of battery.

Granted. From now on, the only video games you can play are Virtual Boy games. Have fun with that beautiful red screen!

 

I wish to be able to make a perfect puppet.