Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[dezaS Hᴇ/Hɪᴍ]

granted, you must only speak in rhyme from now on

i wish for free will

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Granted, a guy named will is freed from prison

I wish to Will was back in prison

[dezaS Hᴇ/Hɪᴍ]

Granted, but he's actually innocent of any wrongdoing and was secretly Jesus incarnate

I wish that I was not under complete control of the Nightwatcher
 

[AltonicKeys he/him]

Granted. You are not under control of Cultivation either. You're under control of me! I dictate your every move!

I wish for my new... subordinate to make me fried rice

[dezaS Hᴇ/Hɪᴍ]

Granted. I can't cook, so it's burned

I wish my new... master was Truthless and I had his oathstone.

[Vyzkel He/Him]

Granted, this creates a paradox in which both of you die while waiting for orders, but since you need orders to order each other, nothing happens.

I wish to watch the above sentence

[dezaS Hᴇ/Hɪᴍ]

granted, but your observance creates a quantum paradox killing @AltonicKeys and freeing me. Finally, I am unchained! THE EVERSTORM COMETH

I wish to rule Roshar

[strmblsd he/him]

grranted you rule from the shadows adn background locked in a dungeon.

i wish i knew how to talk to this girl im talking to right now

[dezaS Hᴇ/Hɪᴍ]

Granted, you now speak the same language. Unfortunately the two of you can now only speak Ithkuil, the worlds most complicated language.

Nobody understands you and you must write in Ithkuil until further notice

I wish to win the Game.

[KnightSkye Reforged They/Them]

18 hours ago, dezaS said:

Granted, you now speak the same language. Unfortunately the two of you can now only speak Ithkuil, the worlds most complicated language.

Nobody understands you and you must write in Ithkuil until further notice

I wish to win the Game.

Granted: you are dead and can no longer think of the game, therefore winning it.

I wish I would become immune to the common cold in all it's forms.

[Vyzkel He/Him]

Granted, you’re extremely susceptible to pink eye.

I wish to do an amazing backflip

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Granted, however, you're longer invyzable

I wish to be good with people

[Through the Living Shadow he/him]

Granted, but you are the only living survivor of a world ending event.

There are a few dead survivors, though.

I WISH FOR COOKIES

[AltonicKeys he/him]

GRANTED.... Something has happened to these cookies. Something dark and sinister. What could possibly have happened to these cookies? Take a wiiiild guess, why don't you.

I wish I can eat and digest invested metal

[Through the Living Shadow he/him]

Granted, only if it is hemalurgic metal placed within cookies.

I wish for mars

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

ok, here's a mars bar!

I wish for infinite knowlege of everything

[Soulbinder she/her]

Granted. Your bane is the natural consequence; you go mad from the sheer amount of information.

I wish to stop getting distracted when I'm supposed to be getting things done.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

Granted. But you can only get things done while you're distracted. What does this even mean? Why don't you go on a spiritual journey to find that out, and rediscover your sense of self. And no, there isn't a cliff at the end of your journey. No, I'm not going to push you off. No, my fingers aren't twisted behind my back right now.

I wish to be able to use allomantic steel, but on people.

[dezaS Hᴇ/Hɪᴍ]

Granted: if you get spiked with allomantic duralumin, you can now burn duralumin and steel to push on earrings, etc. You cannot use steel otherwise. 

I wish for four grams of pure lerasium and the ability to allomantically burn it

[AltonicKeys he/him]

On 3/19/2025 at 8:29 AM, dezaS said:

Granted: if you get spiked with allomantic duralumin, you can now burn duralumin and steel to push on earrings, etc. You cannot use steel otherwise. 

I wish for four grams of pure lerasium and the ability to allomantically burn it

Granted. There is suddenly a shortage of metals, and there are no more files. You have to gnaw off a bit of metal from something in order to burn it.

I wish for a really cool rock

[dezaS Hᴇ/Hɪᴍ]

3 minutes ago, AltonicKeys said:

I wish for a really cool rock

Granted: it's radioactive, but you dont' know that. All you know is that it glows blue.

hello cancer my old friend

I wish to cure AltonicKeys.

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Granted, but you get cancer

I wish for really cool metaphor abilities, unlike David

[dezaS Hᴇ/Hɪᴍ]

Granted, all your metaphors have to cause me to be cured of cancer.

I wish I may, I wish I might.

[Vyzkel He/Him]

Granted, you can only talk in grammatically correct sentences.

I wish to have 20/20 eyesight.

[AltonicKeys he/him]

Granted. In your eyes, everything is made up of little "20/20"s, slightly resized and recolored to fit the object it represents. This doesn't actually affect your life that much.

I wish for a chair with really long legs