trash superpowers garbage superpowers

[Just_a_Fan he/him]

a thread for bad, horrid, and otherwise annoying superpowers.

 

Edited September 17, 2023 by Just_a_Fan_YT

[The Sibling she/her]

A horrible superpower could be that you get a dollar for every time you look at your phone in a day, but if you go over ten then you start to loose money. 

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

I think it would suck to be able to fly but only being able to go slower than walking speed.

[Wittles he/him]

How about having the power of unlimited creation. Literally no bounds. You can reshape reality and time itself.

but only for a single second on thursday the 12 on a leap year .

You also don't automatically know you even have this power

Edited May 15, 2023 by Wittles of Shinovar

[Quantus he/him]

The Ability to make your urine smell of asparagus at will.

The Ability to digest sugars directly into alcohol in your bowels

The Ability to burn in the presence of visible spectrum light as if it were UV.  

 

[Just_a_Fan he/him]

the ability to believe its not butter.

the ability to make wonderful masterpieces, but on ludicrously outdated media. (like, vinyl or the nes.)

[alder24]

Invisibility but only when nobody can see you.

Bulletproof skin but every 10th bullet.

Turning gold into lead.

Breathing under lava.

Time travel but only 1 second into the future.

Teleportation but it doesn't take into account Earth's rotation nor its movement around the Sun, nor the Solar System movement around the center of Milky Way, nor Milky Way's movement in the Local Group, nor its movement in any other bigger structure in the Universe.

Laser eyes that will burn out your own eyes.

Super hearing but you can't hear in normal human frequency range anymore.

Shapeshifting but it works only once and you don't know that.

[Argenti he/him]

39 minutes ago, alder24 said:

Shapeshifting but it works only once and you don't know that.

This is why if you ever use a shapshifting spell, make minor changes the first time

[The Sibling she/her]

3 hours ago, alder24 said:

Teleportation but it doesn't take into account Earth's rotation nor its movement around the Sun, nor the Solar System movement around the center of Milky Way, nor Milky Way's movement in the Local Group, nor its movement in any other bigger structure in the Universe.

 

I mean.. this is still pretty good.

[The Paradoxical Phenomenon he/him]

29 minutes ago, The Sibling said:

I mean.. this is still pretty good.

-_^ huh? This is terrible!

[Wittles he/him]

39 minutes ago, The Sibling said:

I mean.. this is still pretty good.

9 minutes ago, TheAlpha929 said:

-_^ huh? This is terrible!

It's not that bad. You would still be able to teleport, just smaller distances lest you get thrown out into space

 

Time travel, but you go forwards in backwards in the exact position you started in.

Edited May 15, 2023 by Wittles of Shinovar

[alder24]

10 hours ago, The Sibling said:

I mean.. this is still pretty good.

9 hours ago, Wittles of Shinovar said:

It's not that bad. You would still be able to teleport, just smaller distances lest you get thrown out into space

Earth spin - 0.5 km/s, orbital speed of Earth - 30 km/s, orbital speed of the Solar System around the center of Milky Way - 220 km/s, speed of Milky Way across the Universe - 580 km/s relative to CBR. You are guaranteed to teleport either into the middle of Earth, or far away into space. IF you're lucky, you teleport somewhere high in the air and you will not only drop to the ground and get killed, but also get smashed by the air, because you landed on a different latitude and your rotational speed is different that the air's rotational speed (at equator it's 1600 km/h, while at London it's 1000 km/h). Either way you're dead.

[The Sibling she/her]

3 hours ago, alder24 said:

Earth spin - 0.5 km/s, orbital speed of Earth - 30 km/s, orbital speed of the Solar System around the center of Milky Way - 220 km/s, speed of Milky Way across the Universe - 580 km/s relative to CBR. You are guaranteed to teleport either into the middle of Earth, or far away into space. IF you're lucky, you teleport somewhere high in the air and you will not only drop to the ground and get killed, but also get smashed by the air, because you landed on a different latitude and your rotational speed is different that the air's rotational speed (at equator it's 1600 km/h, while at London it's 1000 km/h). Either way you're dead.

But what if you did all the math and then teleported. I'm just saying even you it worked one time in your life it would be pretty dang awesome

[The Bookwyrm he/him]

13 hours ago, Wittles of Shinovar said:

Time travel, but you go forwards in backwards in the exact position you started in.

Here's the thing; we're all already time travelers.

We travel through time at about one second per second.

[alder24]

5 minutes ago, The Sibling said:

But what if you did all the math and then teleported. I'm just saying even you it worked one time in your life it would be pretty dang awesome

Because of the chaotic movement of everything, you just can't do math. You not only need to include those speeds, but also how Sun moves in local region influenced by neighboring stars, how Sun moves up and down the Milky Way disc, how our galaxy moves in relation to Andromeda and 50 dwarf galaxies, how our Local Group moves within the Virgo Supercluster and so on and so on. That's basically impossible to calculate, as everything is moving as well.

 

[The Sibling she/her]

Just now, alder24 said:

Because of the chaotic movement of everything, you just can't do math. You not only need to include those speeds, but also how Sun moves in local region influenced by neighboring stars, how Sun moves up and down the Milky Way disc, how our galaxy moves in relation to Andromeda and 50 dwarf galaxies, how our Local Group moves within the Virgo Supercluster and so on and so on. That's basically impossible to calculate, as everything is moving as well.

 

Okay never mind. That's a good point.

[alder24]

New powers!

Human torch who isn't fireproof.

Ability to sweat with butter.

Gills that allow you to breathe underwater, but you still have normal lungs, which will be filled with water, giving you a constant feeling of drowning, the opposite on the land, you gills, now filled with air, can't breathe giving you constant feeling of drowning.

Sticky hands, like Spiderman has, but once something sticks to them, it can't be unstuck.

Everyone you touch turns into you.

Dolittle - you can talk with animals but can't understand and talk with humans (that's not that bad tbf).

You can detect poison but only when it's in your bloodstream.

Aquaman but with thalassophobia.

Super strength but you don't know how to touch delicately.

[The Paradoxical Phenomenon he/him]

On 5/16/2023 at 9:28 AM, alder24 said:

Everyone you touch turns into you.

If I ever get that power, y’all better prepare for a world full of ugly people

[InfiniteInsanity she/her]

32 minutes ago, TheAlpha929 said:

If I ever get that power, y’all better prepare for a world full of ugly people

...don't be mean to yourself....

[The Paradoxical Phenomenon he/him]

12 minutes ago, InfiniteInsanity said:

...don't be mean to yourself....

I’m actually excited, don’t worry!

[Just_a_Fan he/him]

you can create a portal to the pokemon world.

but only to the world of twitch dates pokemon, or mystery dungeon.

in other words, there are no other humans in the world, and the pokemon have an equally advanced civilisation.

chances are, something's going to be poisonous.

on top of that, it takes a week to recharge.

@The Bookwyrm

Edited May 24, 2023 by Just_a_Fan_YT

[The Stick]

To be able to access any Sanderson novel in a finished version before it is finished, but you forget every chapter of the Cosmere besides the one you are currently reading.

[Scars of Hathsin he/him]

Time Travelling only backwards in time but you cant go forward at all, not even to get where you were. 

Being able to understand every language on the planet, but no talking, and you don't know how to write in the language.

Being immortal, but your body still ages as time goes on.

[Argenti he/him]

12 hours ago, Scars of Hathsin said:

Being immortal, but your body still ages as time goes on.

THE LORD RULER!?!?!

[Just_a_Fan he/him]

You can speak in Halo CE elite

Edited September 17, 2023 by Just_a_Fan_YT