The Battle for the Sandwich

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I share my fried chicken with you. You get the fries.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

Excellent. I-

WHO JUST VOTED FOR FRENCH??

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I ask you very politely why that is bolded.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

27 minutes ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

I ask you very politely why that is bolded.

And I respond, equally politely, that it was in-character. Tends to be how bolding works. 

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I give you the last piece of chicken for that wisdom.

BUT

When you grab the chicken, your hand passes right through it, revealing that it was a Lightweaving. You fall backward in surprise, perfectly going through a conveniently placed tunnel lined with knives, paper shredders, stun guns,  and cheese graters. at the end of the tunnel, you are sucked into a mini-black hole, and you, paralyzed beyond any paralysis ever to happen, are transported directly in front of a exploding star, getting caught in the blast and disintegrating. I put the sandwich on the next hill over- or do I?

Edited February 10 by Kaladist The Ketek Writer

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

6 minutes ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

I give you the last piece of chicken for that wisdom.

BUT

When you grab the chicken, your hand passes right through it, revealing that it was a Lightweaving. You fall backward in surprise, perfectly going through a conveniently placed tunnel lined with knives, paper shredders, stun guns,  and cheese graters. at the end of the tunnel, you are sucked into a mini-black hole, and you, paralyzed beyond any paralysis ever to happen, are transported directly in front of a exploding star, getting caught in the blast and disintegrating. I put the sandwich on the next hill over- or do I?

I appear behind you and tap you on the shoulder. I frown, sweeping an arm out to gesture at the scattered remains of my other body. “That was slightly overkill. You could’ve just started with the disintegration.”

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

"Well," I say, "I wanted to give the camera crew some drama." I gesture to the camera crew.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

14 minutes ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

"Well," I say, "I wanted to give the camera crew some drama." I gesture to the camera crew.

I tell the camera crew to roll the clips, then spend the next hour enjoying watching myself be cheese grated and exploded. 

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I repair your hill with the utility guy

I eat the last fry.

I accidentally rhyme. I get a power boost.

[Bones He/Him]

10 minutes ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

I accidentally rhyme. I get a power boost.

This line destroys the rhyme and you get a negative boost. I destroy the hill then throw you into the cheese grater and I fly off with the sandwich.

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

Didn't what happened to Ashkaloda teach you anything? When you grab the sandwich, your hand passes right through it, revealing that it was a Lightweaving. You fall backward in surprise, perfectly going through another conveniently placed tunnel lined with knives, paper shredders, stun guns,  and cheese graters. at the end of the tunnel, you are sucked into a mini-black hole, and you, paralyzed beyond any paralysis ever to happen, are transported directly in front of another exploding star, getting caught in the blast and disintegrating. I do not come to your funeral. I steal the real Sandwich and escape to the Spiritual realm

[Bones He/Him]

As you enter the spiritual realm, my real self steals the sandwich and puts you into a mandatory vision that does not end.

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

I say cool keteks, freeing myself, I get Sandwich get I, myself freed, Keteks cool say I

I run off while you stand the bedazzled by the pure amazingness of my Ketek. you are paralyzed by my Pikachu as well.

congrats bones you've ranked up in reputation

[Bones He/Him]

Your Keteks make no sense, but no matter. The sandwich you had was fake. The real one was in the vision. I go into the vision, take the sandwich, and hide in another vision.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

3 hours ago, Bones said:

Your Keteks make no sense, but no matter. The sandwich you had was fake. The real one was in the vision. I go into the vision, take the sandwich, and hide in another vision.

I wake you up and you are now out of the vision, but the Sandwich is in the vision. I travel there, grab it, wake up, and then shove you back into the vision.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

6 hours ago, Unintelligenius said:

I wake you up and you are now out of the vision, but the Sandwich is in the vision. I travel there, grab it, wake up, and then shove you back into the vision.

Upon which you are promptly jumped by four fish with legs. 

[NerdSandwich she/her]

13 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

Excellent. I-

WHO JUST VOTED FOR FRENCH??

I AM MAD

MUST DIEEE
I STEAL THE SANDWICH AND STASH IT IN A MICROWAVE

 

[Unintelligenius he/him]

4 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

Upon which you are promptly jumped by four fish with legs. 

The fish jump on me, but are unfortunately only minnows so they bounce off and I keep walking as if nothing happened.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

5 minutes ago, Unintelligenius said:

The fish jump on me, but are unfortunately only minnows so they bounce off and I keep walking as if nothing happened.

The minnows are seven feet tall and rather heavy. 

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

The minnows fall on your signature and accidentally are sucked into TLT, never to be seen again.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

Well everyone is dumbfounded by the disappearance of the minnows I grab the Sandwich from @NerdSandwich and make a walk for it.

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

6 minutes ago, Unintelligenius said:

Well everyone is dumbfounded by the disappearance of the minnows I grab the Sandwich from @NerdSandwich and make a walk for it.

I speedway up to you, grab the Sandwich from your hand, and continue to speedwalk away ahead of you. 

[NerdSandwich she/her]

I sprint to you, steal the Sandwich, and sprint away.

[Through The Living Ash he/him]

53 minutes ago, Kaladist The Ketek Writer said:

The minnows fall on your signature and accidentally are sucked into TLT, never to be seen again.

They reappeared moments later, due to Authorial intervention on my part preventing them from showing up in TLT unplanned. 

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

Not have learned their lesson, the minnows fall once again on your signature and accidentally are sucked into the cult of the WIZBIRBS this time, never to be seen again.