AltonicKeys

Granted. Turns out taking E doesn't really change you that much. You get a better color discrimination, and you're at greater risk of breast cancer now. The Nightwatcher feels bad and gives you a double jump ability. The bane is the risk of cancer. I wish to be able to beam motivation into everyone's brain at will

Granted. You get a rat that goes around petting things. It lightly pats things around your house, but it hates you and runs away from you as much as it can. Your neighbor eventually adopts it, and it loves them. You can see it running around their house, petting their things. I wish I had more time to do stuff I actually want to do

Granted. You now own every Way of Kings leatherbound book. The world economy collapses and it's all your fault. I wish Tyler blows up

Granted. and but which also means . , so . unfortunately. , . the , for turkey sandwich. I wish I get all the nutrition I need and I never have to worry about my food intake

Granted. You finish the book, and it's a pretty good book. However, some big company decides that you're an easy target, and sues you for copyright infringement over using the word "and," which they have exclusive rights over. You spend the rest of your life fighting in the court of law and never touch the pen again. I wish people would act like decent human beings

Granted. You don't make a wish and so the Nightwatcher blows you up into a billion smithereens. I wish I can enter and exit time loops at will

Granted. You understand it perfectly, no strings attached. So well in fact, that you decide to make a career out of it and go into accounting. This makes you a lot of money and you get kinda rich, but your life has been entirely devoted to math. Your hair has fallen out from the stress. Your soul has shriveled up and you've lost all meaning in life. I wish I can absorb the artistic talent of people around me

Granted. Falsch foirf garrubis et karrhim almuj detlas. Ploikel eid munarek qken The Tower of Babel lorbed mofos hu sa jiph ouen sthaeie wreacc de mmeit jod at pourle jaets of hevin reimbut grashel. I wish I was able to lock in at will

Granted. You communicate so well with everyone that you run out of things to communicate. Everyone knows exactly what's going on the moment they see you. Thus, you don't have to say anything ever. You fall out of practice of talking and your throat dries up. You eventually choke on your food and pass away. I wish to never work again in my life

Being on the surface of the sun

Granted. That happens. It's really disgusting and horrible, because the jaw was also made sideways. In order to keep the face symmetrical, I basically split the skull down the middle so that both halves are the jaws. Everyone's faces widen and contract when they speak or chew. I'm such a great bioengineer. I wish April Fools day was every day

Um... Ignoring all the discourse on whether this theory can be true or not... Could we argue that the reason Bondsmiths work the way they do is because the Bondsmith spren that we've seen so far are splinters of Shards, which would be closer to the SR? I refuse to believe that their abilities are purely a result of a resonance between surges, and having a lot of investiture. Following that logic, if you made a "normal" true spren for Bondsmiths, on the same level of investiture and "SR affinity" as an honorspren, would we see a less powerful set of abilities more on-par with the other orders? And an enlightened version of this Bondsmith spren would grant the powers we've seen? (Maybe to a lesser degree since they don't have the same investiture amount as the Stormfather or whatever)