AltonicKeys

iiiiiinteresting. The Flame, you say? Sounds familiar.....

GRANTED.... Something has happened to these cookies. Something dark and sinister. What could possibly have happened to these cookies? Take a wiiiild guess, why don't you. I wish I can eat and digest invested metal

Granted. You are not under control of Cultivation either. You're under control of me! I dictate your every move! I wish for my new... subordinate to make me fried rice

As he wiped down another table, Gerald spotted someone outside the shop. Stepping outside, he called out, "Hey there pal, you don't seem too gleeful right now. Are you doing alright?" And while he was indeed concerned for this newcomer, Gerald also saw something to be achieved with his arrival. "Come inside, why don't ya? Better than sulking around in the cold."

Granted. Your house gets flooded with oil. You can do nothing about it. Well, you couldn't have done anything before the wish either. I wish I had ever-lasting batteries

Granted. You fall in love. She does not. She takes all your money instead. I wish for a life-sized cardboard cutout of Tom Jones

Granted. You're too dangerous. They've locked you away forever. I wish for a really cool burger with NO weird deformities

I bypass your defense system with one simple trick: 25 cubic meters of plutonium! The radiation blasts you from inside. The mutations it forces in your body causes muscle spasms that coincidentally cause you to somehow deactivate the weapon systems, coincidentally kill the spores with your emergency silver dust, use your backup Dragonsteel shell cutter to open a hole in the wall and through the terken silver. By chance. Somehow. Unfortunately Doomslug then deletes the bunker, and all my efforts have been in vain. I hit you with a lead pipe to cure you of the radiation poisoning.

(give us a wiiiiiish and we will fulfiiiiiill it)

What does this even meeaaannnn??? why would you do that!! That's so mean of you! I will not be granting your wish. Instead, you get r/broamposting, where they only post really good content, and you become spiritually satisfied and enlightened. Take that. I wish to not need to blink

Granted. You sell the penny, though this greatly damages the economy. You get 2.5 million dollars, but that amount is equal to how much a penny was 10 minutes ago. You can't even buy a decent burger with 100 million dollars. I wish for a decent burger

Gerald coughed. "Um. No. What? That's crazy." Each word shook a bit of dust off his clothes. "Anyways, enjoy your 'drink'. I don't see how you can, but I do appreciate your patronage."

"Miss Lark, sorry for the wait, but here's your extra extra large Flame, extra hot, extra spicy, extra mystery ingredient! Ah, don't drink it in one go. That might be bad," Gerald advised. He was covered in burn marks and red powder, and his eyes seemed to water. The cat sat as far away from the counter as it could. "Or just don't drink it. But who am I to judge?"

Kiss sphere, marry Great stellated dodecahedron, kill square antiprism. We hate square antiprism. Rock, paper, scissors

Granted. Uh oh! Half the pieces are misprinted and don't fit? Uh oh! Every Lego store and reseller have suddenly closed? Uh oh! The set was actually a front for a top secret weapon capable of killing an ancient deity? Uh oh! Despite giving it away, due to your past connection to it, you now have a target on your back and are now being hunted by the Fight Brigade? I wish to be able to juggle

Granted. They're dry and withered and hollow and soggy and too thick and too salty and too long and too bland and too thin and too hot and deformed and unthawed and refried and deflated and too wet and too stale and too gray and too chewy and too crumbly and too unripe and too seasoned and too mushy and too ripe and I wish to have all the knowledge on music theory ever conceived

Gerald slid a card to Jectree as he mixed brandy into a Flame, silently serving it to Taylor.

"Another Flame right away, my friend." Based on his demeanor, Gerald sensed a potential regular. "Want a punch card with that? Get a free drink every ten purchases. Pretty good deal, I think." He waved at the cop. Though his more enthusiastic patrons didn't seem to like law enforcement very much, he wasn't one to shoo away money. "Good day, officer. What can I do you for?"

"One Flame on the way!" The special in question was essentially just really hot and strong coffee which was also somewhat spicy. For whatever reason. He plated the respective drinks for Jac and Herald. "Need anything else with that?"

"Mocha coming right up!" Gerald F. Lane produced a Flame of his own - His sweet brewing skills. Though it didn't have as much pizzaz as an expensive bartender, he knew countless different styles of the drink. As he worked, he waved Herald and the big guy with the cigar in. "Howdy howdy, what can I do for you two fine gentlemen?" The cat brushed against Herald familiarly in its own greeting.

Gerald again smiled at another newcomer, the orange cat again pacing by their feet. "Well hey there! Good amount of people coming in, that announcement must have left every one drained, huh? I'll admit, His Majesty makes me quite thirsty when he does his spiel, haha. Anyways, what can I do for ya today?"

Gerald, miraculously behind the counter again, waves her in, and does the same for the man standing outside. "Welcome to The Flame, what can I get you?" An orange cat jumps off a shelf and paces around Lark.

Gerald turned to face the newcomer with a grin on his face. "A fellow enjoyer of the brew, huh? Here, take this advertisement card with our address on it." He points out the general direction of the shop, and rambles off a few marketing phrases to ensure his catch. Boy, he's gathering quite a few potential customers today. Soon he'll gain almost a cult following. Maybe he'll call them The Flame.