I'm grateful for many things. You'd think that with all the wonderful things I have I'd be happier. I guess that demonstrates stupidity and selfishness on my part. Oh well, anyway...
I'm grateful for cello. It helps calm me down, and it's something that I've actually been able to get decently good at through hard work. It's very rewarding for me to play, and I think that the times I'm playing my instrument are some of the best. It helps me feel peaceful, and I get distracted from everything else, and since that's really all I can do, playing the cello helps me escape.
I'm thankful for books. They've been my companions for many years. I remember staring at my bookshelf for hours because I wanted to read something but I'd already read it all. Now, I don't read as much as I used to. I'm simply worn out, and I have a hard time finding books to read. I also have a hard time wanting to do things that I used to find interesting. But books help me to remove my mental presence from wherever my body may be physically, and I am so thankful for that.
I'm extraordinarily thankful for my friends. I don't typically have a lot of friends. In fact, now is the first time I can remember having more than one friend at once in my entire life. I'd do anything, give anything for them, no matter how much it hurts. Sometimes I care so much I feel like it's going to rip me apart. And other times I'm just being plain stupid. But I wouldn't go back for anything no matter what. Even though everything will be gone soon, I'm glad that I've had this short time to be with them. No matter how scared I am of being alone. They mean so very much to me. I don't know what I would do or where I would be without them.
I'm so, so, thankful for music. I feel through it. Music helps me to process my emotions and let them out instead of being overwhelmed by them, which even still I am. Music helps make things bearable because it helps me to think through things, and it helps me to feel. It helps me to understand. With music, I am everything and nothing all at once. It helps me to understand me.