Elf

So my textbooks came in, but ive been feeling a bit bad and guilty for not feeling like studying recently, even though college is like a month away since all the registration work hasn't even finished. 

But, you know I've been having a really bad week and I think i realised that if im not feeling my best, stressing out over something not even here yet is a straight up recipe for worse mental health. 

I think, sometimes you have to realise that your mental peace is the most important thing. Its the thing you need to protect at all costs. 

And sometimes slowing down, taking a deep breath and giving yourself some TLC is the best thing you can do. 

Sometimes all you need is to paint your nails and watch youtube for a while. Or Netflix. Sometimes all you need is to listen to calming music and read for like six hours. Sometimes all you need is to take a walk and listen to a podcast.

And thats...thats okay.

It makes me wonder, why do we as a society put so much emphasis on "hustling"? On getting as much work done as possible; why do we get called lazy for not filling every second of every day with "productivity"? (What even is productivity anyway? Shouldn't it be subjective? It is defined as "how efficiently an individual completes his/ her goals". What if my goal is to binge watch the entirety of a Netflix show?) (I'm not saying that its all you do. But we shouldn't have set parameters for what productivity means)

And i mean, this is an excuse that at least my parents have used in the past, "If you're not well enough to do (insert work or chore) then you're not well enough to (insert thing you enjoy)" 

Which is absolute crem. Doing that work would be more physically and mentally taxing than the thing you enjoy. And i can guarantee you that doing something you enjoy while you're sick will help you get better that much quicker. It took me a long time to stop feeling guilty for being "well enough" to read even though i was too sick to study or do some chores. 

You don't have to just lie in bed like a log of wood. 

(Went on a slight tangent there but eh)

Thing is. This is your life. And you get only one shot at it. 

Isn't it your responsibility to make the absolute best of it? 

And sure. 

That means chasing your dream; it means getting work done; it means getting to a particular level in life. 

But if you're sacrificing your mental health and peace for it, then you aren't really making the best of your life. Because life is inherently meant to be lived. To have fun, to do things you enjoy and to be happy. 

This was way too long, and idk why i wrote it but I'll end with this. 

Quote

Are we living a life that is safe from harm?
Of course not. We never are. But that’s not the right question. The question is are we living a life that is worth the harm?

In short, its okay to chill out. Chase your dreams, don't get caught up in useless drama and enjoy life for what it is.