Snakenaps

She and Virgil haven't met yet. That'll be a slow introduction that involves a spray bottle. Unfortunately, they'll have to meet today because Virgil needs a bedding change. I'd rather wait until I know how strong Junie's hunting instincts are, but when Virgil makes a mess of his tank, it's time to clean. My sister came up with the name!

In Reading Excuses News: After three weeks, I think I'm caught up on everyone's chapters, except for @shatteredsmooth's short story, which I'm halfway through. Whew! If I missed you, let me know. Mishaps Updates: My AC is still out and my sister purchased herself an SUV to replace her totaled car. In Happy News: On Monday, I adopted a kitty I have been looking at for a long time. I didn't want to say anything until I finalized her name, but meet Juniper (June, Junie, or June-bug for short): She's a three year old shelter cat, who is the darkest shade of brown but passes for black in all but the brightest of lighting. Has been in the shelter since February, overlooked because of her coloring. Junie is a complete lovebug who is currently laying against my leg as I type this. She's spent the last couple days of critiquing passed out next to me as I sit on the couch. Juniper has scared me to death by hiding inside the couch (I thought I somehow lost her in less than a week of owning her) and likes to lick me until my hand is drenched and raw when she wants to reward me for petting her. I've wanted a cat since I moved away for college, and I'm so happy I chose her. She's like the perfect mixture of all of my favorite cats growing up. I can't wait to see how she settles in. Thanks for listening

I'm always looking for something new to read, and it's been a long while since I've read any mysteries. Since you wrote it for fun, I assume you don't want LBL's? I'll critique it for you if you want, but I'm also more than happy to read it for simple pleasure. You just let me know.

Thoughts as I go: Pg 1, "A troll is a small creature." I usually think of trolls as massive hulking beasts, so I'm instantly curious on where you are taking this. Pg 1, " setting her magazine near the birthday cake" Reading a magazine during a birthday? Waiting for guests, bored, or simply doesn't care? I don't get the feeling of not caring, just the distracted aura of parenting. Pg 1, “He would have come,” Would have...so more likely Dad went out to buy some milk and never returned than went into the army. Either way, Dad is either dead or simply not around. Pg 1, "voice shocked" Hmm, doesn't tell me if Dad is missing or dead. Maybe I'll find out later? I feel like I need an answer, since it seems so important to S. Pg 1, "were big and held a green luminescence." I already love it. Pg 1, "Colours are nice." Awwww!!! Pg 2, "She ran and jumped." Initially pictured a flat, low boulder, now picturing a tall-ish boulder. Pg 2, "Yes. I see” So cuuuuuuute. Pg 2, "She got rid of him." Hopefully not by murder. Pg 3, "Because mum wouldn’t listen." Sounds like an official divorce rather than "I'm going to go buy milk" and never returning. Also, Mum should probably be capitalized, since S is referring to her as a proper noun. Pg 3, "We... breathe them out.” Does...it involve blowing in people's faces? I mean, he did sniff her breath earlier. Pg 3, "I…have to go,” Thief! Pg 4, "You never listen!” Echoes why Dad left. Nice. Pg 4, "Might get people knocking on your door," Rude! I do not trust mystery woman. To quote Monty Python and the Holy Grail: "We have found a witch, may we burn her?" Pg 5, "Give me the leaf." Troll hunter? Pg 5, "a bright and virulent green" I think this is our ol' friend, and not a new troll. Pg 6, "It was a good day for ice cream." Correction: all days are good for ice cream I liked how you switched the gender of our leaf gatherer and our witch, because I did not foresee them being one in the same. A delightful story! I had fun reading this. The only problem is...I want more!

I respect that, especially since my sister's parked car just got totalled by a drunk driver this week. I believe in everything in moderation. I've gotten drunk three times in my life, never bad enough to have a hangover, and definitely never enough to puke. Always in a safe place surrounded by people I firmly trust. Picking up my former roommate and watching her puke in my bucket on the drive home, and on a separate occasion, puke on the bath mat, and all of her other occasions, made me decide I never want to do that. Alcoholism also runs in my extended bloodline, so I'm hyperaware that I'm possibly genetically susceptible to it. I enjoy a glass of wine or a beer when having a good meal or hanging out with friends, but that's about it. A special occasion drink. I'm definitely the minority in this town for my age group. My sister's neighbors literally have a dedicated bathroom to drunk puking. College town, whoop whoop. There's nothing wrong with a little responsible drinking, but on the other hand, not drinking will save you a lot of money. Also, I'm taking over a non-Lounge thread again, sorry @kais it's a horrible habit of mine. At least this time I'm calling out myself. My long point was, everything that has so far occurred in this story regarding alcohol has echoed my own experiences or the experiences of those around me, including M's low tolerance.

I wish that was my excuse. I'm 5'5" (an inch above the national average) and I get pleasantly drunk off of two glasses of wine. Any more than a glass and my cheeks turn pink and my hands actually start getting circulation. My former 5 foot roommate could easily drink me under the table (not that it would be hard). Everyone has different tolerances, and a glass and a half for getting drunk isn't too far off from myself.

Thoughts as I go: Pg 1, "Her headache." Do you mean, her head ached? Pg 1, " they felt overturned and slimy, disconnected and disjointed." Ugh, this feels like the worst kind of violation. Gives me the heebie geebies. Pg 1, "Even if the radio worked" I have to wonder if the radio was broken by a Demon, or because this is a very old, definitely worn Jeep. Pg 1, " it lifted her damp hair" Just said damp a second ago in this sentence. Change one up? Pg 1, "it flew around and thrashed her face" What is it about this stinging feeling that feels so good? This makes me want to take a joyride. Pg 1, " two construction sites she hit where three lanes squeezed down to one" The literal bane of my existence. Pg 2, " the parking rates, forty-two dollars per day." Okay, I actually didn't believe this to be true. I mean, $42 per day??? So I Googled it. 350 Kendall Street Garage. $42 for 10-24 hours. Jeez!!! Parking here is 50 cents an hour, max $5 a day. I am so glad I don't live in a big city. Pg 2, " it would be worth parking for a night or two" On a college budget!? Pg 2, " her uncle had set aside a college fund" Okay, speaking from someone who recently graduated from college and has family and friends still in college, I'd reword this a little to make sure it doesn't sound like M is really well off, but only her uncle. I went to a state college that was very forgiving with financial aid, and neither my sister nor I ever qualified for a lick of it. My cousin is losing her Fafsa (federal student aid) because the government counted her stimulus check and her unemployment against her federal aid. I'm talking a difference of $6,000 cost her her entire financial aid and nearly cost her her semester of college had not her parents stepped in. My friend has to earn less than $12,000 a year, otherwise her savings plus her job knocks her out of the running for paid tuition and textbooks. There is a very tight line between receiving financial aid and not getting a dime. It sucks, because you have to live this line of barely paying rent but being able to afford college, or paying rent but being unable to pay for college without exterior support. I have no clue what financial aid is like for MIT or Massachusetts, only a bit for California. Pg 2, " his thoughts had been muddled with depression" Money doesn't equal happiness. Pg 2, " it was too late." Oh man, slapping that guilt on from a young age. Pg 2, " desperate for a distraction" This is, like, the opposite time the suite needs to be empty! This girl needs support! Pg 3, " which was off with the battery out," To keep Mi's enemies at bay, I assume, since they already sent false texts from her mother. Pg 3, "someone followed me" This isn't going to help Mi's paranoia at all. Pg 4, "Do you want me to hug you?" It's definitely what she needs. Pg 6, "the two pizza boxes" That is not enough pizza. M could eat that all by herself. Pg 7, " maybe have trust issues" Whaaaaat, noooooooo, she said in heavy sarcasm. Pg 8, "multiverse theory and mythology." Hmm...I wonder if he's the reason Mi got interested in the supernatural? Pg 8, “Is that what got you so interested in the paranormal?” Oh, well, took the words right out of my mouth. Pg 9, " I’ll make sure nothing eats you." I know she's buff, but does he believe she can really protect him from much? Or is he just glad to have help, and someone to talk to about this craziness? Pg 9, " he unlocked it" Read this at first as he unlocked her hand and I was momentarily confused. Pg 9, " It took her three tries to get the text coherent." Pg 10, "grabbed a fourth cider." Someone is not going to have a fun morning. Pg 11, "We set boundaries before you came here," Good lad. I like how this book emphasizes healthy relationships. I admit I feel like I got a little bit of emotional whiplash, since she went from sad, to joyride happy, to very sad, to okay at Mi's, to very drunk.

Thoughts as I go: Pg 1, "She almost said no." Nearly running away again. M is so strong and brave when it comes to fighting the supernatural, so I like how she is...definitely not that normal society. It is frustrating on how her running away affects other people, but at the same time...I'd love to run away from more of my social hiccups myself (although at least I'm not a part of a love square). Pg 1, "he’d hardly acknowledged her" In order for their relationship, these two awkward, slow dorks both need to learn to communicate. A and T know how to communicate (especially A), but our M&M's have no clue. Pg 1, "knee high boots that had sheaths built into them" Pg 1, "They made her feel like a pirate." *squints eye* Argh, me matey! Pg 2, "And I don’t live on campus." Kid, that ain't healthy. Pg 2, "I don’t want to talk about that," These two and their avoidance strategies. It's going to be a blast watching them both suffer when the straw breaks the camel's back (by blast I mean I better get a tummy ache from stress and a chest ache from the sads). Pg 2, "could just hook up with different people all the time or why she needed to sleep with someone every weekend" See, this is why A and T might work, but not A, T, and M. Pg 3, "He squeezed her hand tighter as they paused at a crosswalk." Ugh, I want to give this boy a hug. Pg 3, “Anxiety generally doesn’t make sense.” So true. Pg 3, "I had two bachelor’s degrees by the time I was nineteen." Dang. Pg 3, “Were you homeschooled?” This definitely sounds like a homeschool thing. Pg 4, “That sucks.” To put it simply, yes. Pg 4, " not the ghost hunters that just ghosted you?" Heh heh heh. Pg 5, “That is a terrible idea.” Agreed. It's a bad idea to go poking bears. Pg 5, "was more comfortable reading his mind," Pg 5, “Right now?” This is the story of how Mi began to live at a restaurant because he was too afraid to cross the street. Pg 6, "Still no reply." Trap? Pg 6, "Once she stepped through, time would all but stop for her." Dang, I thought only Demons could do that. Must be fairly unpredictable/dangerous because otherwise I'd be using it to teleport all the time. Pg 7, "she had strapped to one of her wheelchairs" That sounds awesome. Did I know her mother used a wheelchair? I can't remember... Pg 7, "What the hell are you doing here?" To quote Admiral Ackbar: "It's a trap!" Pg 8, "They were big, smelly, demons that loved munching on human bones." I wonder if there is a better way to put it, as the sudden exposition jars me out of my panic and worry. Pg 9, "singing it’s its back with flames and shrapnel. It’s Its back steamed as it roared." Pg 9, " It’s Its mind stretched out towards hers." I am assuming autocorrect is your enemy. Pg 9, "fancy LAllomantic tin banishing spells." Doesn't need to be fancy if it works! Pg 9, "was a worse shot than a Star Wars Storm Trooper" Ooooh, burn. Pg 11, "Alime turned to acid" Do you mean slime? Pg 11, "M locked it in a box of sunshine" Pg 12, " It’s Its voice was deep and smooth." Pg 13, " With Dad’s(period) I know Dad stopped by on Sunday" Pg 14, "She’d have to face the wreckage of her mind" M needs a big hug. So does Mi. My M&M's need a hug party. Thoroughly enjoyed the action of this chapter. I liked the metaphors of how M went in the Demon's mind. It made it easy to visualize without being confusing.

Thoughts as I go: Pg 1, " the amount of energy she’d regained over night" Hopefully enough to prevent dying? Pg 1, "it was already the single most awkward day" Oh no, what has happened since she fell asleep? Pg 2, "You weren’t drugged?" Good for A for checking. Pg 2, "Is he ace?” I mean...I feel like this is a kind of off presumption. When I think that two people slept by each other but didn't get it on, I assume that maybe one or both of them want to take the relationship slow, not that one or both of them is asexual. I completely agree with M that sleeping with someone doesn't equal sex, but on the other hand, I understand that A would jump to the conclusion of Mi being ace because A obviously puts a higher priority to sex. So it's off for me, not not necessarily off for A's character. Pg 3, "None of them were in any kind of exclusive relationship." While this is true, I think M needs to figure out what she wants, because right now her indecision is just hurting other people, and that's selfish. She shouldn't toy around with other people's feelings, especially T, who obviously really likes her. If M isn't 100% on board, I feel like then she should be the bigger person and let whomever is on the bottom rung down gently. I know relationships and attraction are never so simple, but I generally find love triangles (squares, this case?) to be hair pulling. Pg 4, "You already did, M thought." M hurt T first by ditching them for Mi. M continues to string T along, and, since I very much like T, it makes me mad at M. This isn't an exclusive relationship, but the lack of communication between them all is going to continue to lead to hurt feelings. Pg 5, "who do you actually have feelings for?" Good for T for asking. Lord, somebody needs to start a conversation and get the cards laid on the table. Pg 5, "gathered up her books and stuffed them in her backpack" Don't run, don't run... Pg 5, "slung her back over her shoulder and stormed away." Girl, sit your rump down and actually figure this out. Stop running away like you are having your first crush in middle or high school!!! Dang it!!! Not only do I feel like A and T are being strung along, but I feel like I am unfairly being strung along too. Pg 6, "Do I have America’s [sweet, sweet buttcheeks]" I understood that reference. Pg 6, “What else do you think is hot about me?” I feel like this is an unfair question for M to ask, because at this point, I don't necessarily trust her to respect T's attraction to her. I feel like this falls under stringing along. I like Mi and M as a couple due to the fact the M will hopefully tell Mi the truth and she'll be able to have a partner who knows and is interested in her secret identity. I like A and T as a couple because I feel like they are very much attracted to each other, and, more importantly, are on the same page of what they want out of a relationship, unlike M. I don't like the idea of M, T, and A in a poly relationship because I don't trust M to not run away from vital conversations that need to happen. She'd be a weak link in the relationship. Pg 7, "Can I kiss you?” First, +1 for consent. Second, I feel like this wasn't well led up to with the boxing, which felt more like having fun than flirty, even with M's question. Third, T deserves better. I don't trust M not to break T's heart with lies and doubt and indecision. Pg 7, "When the suit, no one else was there" *confusion* When the suit? (Honey, where is my super suit?) Pg 7, "subconsciously thinning thinking it as doubling" Pg 8, "she kissed her mouth, her neck, her shoulders." Hmmm, something about this scene isn't working for me. All of the words are right, I should feel something, but instead I feel like a casual observer. It isn't because it is f/f, I've read all kinds of relationships that aren't heterosexual, and I don't care as long as the romance/attraction/tension is good. I think it is because I, at this point, don't trust M is T's heart so much that I just want T out of there. I feel like T is only going to fall more for M, thinking M feels the same, and then is going to get burned again. The foundation isn't there for me. Pg 8, " A surge of hormones hit her head" I find this description odd. Pg 8, " she couldn’t breath" See? This is why I can't trust T with M. Because they want and need totally separate things. M isn't even capable of having an intense make out session without her powers betraying her. T wants to get hot and heavy immediately, and M was slow to even take her shirt off and needs to be asked to take each step. They aren't on the same level. Pg 9, "Maybe all three of us can fit in the shower." I can see T being down for that, but not M. Pg 9, " I can’t...talk right now." M just isn't ready for a green-lights-go, petal-to-the-floor relationship that A definitely seems to crave, and that T may be interested in. This is why I can see T and A working, but not M. I feel awful for T. Like, you get to kiss your crush, she's taken off her shirt, and then she panics, and flees. T deserves someone on her same level. Hmmm, this chapter felt off for me, mostly because I don't think a relationship with T or A can work. I can picture one working with Mi if M tells him about her abilities, but, as it stands, I don't think that M is mature enough for an intense relationship like T and A want, or has the magical shielding to be able to handle two people's thoughts at the same time, let alone one. Mi, with all of his past burdens, seems to need something slow, just like M.

Screen porches sound absolutely wonderful and relaxing. They aren't common here, but I wish they were for when the wasps and mosquitoes come out in full force.

After nearly three weeks, I dive back into these fantastic characters...what has occurred since attempted murder? Dun dun dun... Thoughts as I go: Pg 1, "The back of her arms felt like they were on fire" Can she resist the urge to heal in front of Mi? Pg 1, "whether or not someone had actually tried to kill him" The answer is probably not the one he wants :/ Pg 1, "His heart raced, and his breathing was labored." Boy's connecting the dots. She won't be able to keep herself secret from him much longer. Pg 1, "projecting the words into his head" Hmm, careful, he might recognize the physic push... Pg 1, " a sliver of skin on the small of her back" An oddly sexy image considering the blood. Pg 2, "Being invited into my room is just an invitation to the space." Setting boundaries is important. 1+ points for communication. Pg 2, "Are there ways in which I have permission to touch you?" *eyebrow wiggle* Pg 2, "I’m ace, I think" That makes life a little easier, in a way. At least from an awkwardness POV. Pg 2, " half full package of oreos" Oreos should be capitalized, also, $5 says that package is going to be completely empty by the end of the chapter. Pg 3, "she wasn’t going to get that" That will help her with not accidentally exposing her magical self. Pg 3, "your shirt has a cross section of the Millenium Falcon on it." Now that's sexy. Pg 4, " Humanity might bring on it’s its own destruction" Pg 4, " a slash on the man’s bicep was vivid." Hmm, wondering how this friend got so injured...playing around with something they shouldn't? Or in a situation they couldn't escape? Pg 4, "So where is this bacon ice cream of yours?" Mi asking the relevant questions here. Pg 5, "she had felt she was with A" I've felt A's attraction towards M, but not so much M's attraction towards A. I feel like M is a little attracted to A, but more attracted/invested in T. Pg 5, " Grief sucker punched him out of nowhere." Oh, my poor baby... Pg 6, "Do you always eat right out of the pint?" It's the only way to eat. Pg 6, " a place outside of time" Thanks for providing a definition. Pg 6, "him so we he wouldn’t panic" Pg 7, " some paranormal entity" So it probably won't identify M because she's a mutt. Pg 8, "Her energy levels were dangerously low." Girl, you need a vacation, pronto. Pg 8, "she’d die" Please don't. Pg 9, "a grayscale image of the campsite" Pg 10, "The other energy signatures and huddled around a fire" Pg 10, "information people didn’t want him to know" Hmmmm....what trouble has he gotten to in the past that has caused so much pain and grief? Pg 12, "Is Mi still there?" This is probably because I haven't hopped back into this story in a while, but how did A know Mi was there? Pg 12, "feelings for eachother" Space between "each" and "other" Pg 13, "She fell asleep." Awwww. What a nice breather chapter that held just enough tension and worry to keep the plot moving forwards. I'm enjoying their relationship, and as much as I enjoy T, I hope Mi wins this love...triangle, square maze.

Congratulations on your first submission! Thoughts as I go: Pg 1, " the engineers did try to keep everything comfortable" This sounds like literally the most uncomfortable room. Why are there no edges or corners? On the other hand, no edges or corners means dust bunnies are going to have a hard time collecting. Must be an easy room to clean. Plus, you can hose down steel. Why stainless? Is this a cage? An experimentation room? Pg 1, "dirty, sweaty uniform she hadn’t changed out of for weeks now" First of all, you already said weeks in the first sentence of the paragraph, second of all, if the room is steel, why not just hose her off? I feel like I'd probably go naked than sit in that several week old, bloody uniform. Engineers could deal with it. Pg 1, " though she never used it." Girl has a thing for steel floor beds? Pg 1, " At least, not anymore" Hold up...she's ignoring a dresser full of perfectly good clothes? Why? And if she's given a comfortable bed and a dresser, why not at least a wash basin? And she's been in here before, but before the...blood? Did she escape but get captured again? Pg 1, "She didn’t necessarily want to kill herself;" This room did not strike me as a psych ward, but that doesn't mean girl doesn't have issues. I mean, hell, she's covered in dried blood. Also, if she wanted to kill herself, there seems to be clothes and bed sheets for strangulation. Nothing to hang from, but that doesn't mean you can't get creative. Pg 1, "her looking up at from the floor" Herself or a new character? Pg 1, " that would never again express emotion" I think our MC killed someone, saw someone dead, but this also might be some weird prophecy where she sees herself dead and I'm confused. Pg 2, " she could see her insides as she stabbed and sliced and she stood there in shock" So there was another girl? But where is the body? Is there blood still on the floor? Why hasn't anyone allowed her to clean up? Hoping for answers, feeling lost. Pg 2, " tried to give her command of a couple ships." What? Why? She isn't a prisoner? Why would they give a promotion to a murderer? Pg 2, "almost slipped off the unprotected sides" This is a poor design. Are we in a spaceship? Pg 2, " worried he’d done something to offend a superior officer." Wouldn't most superior officers not be thankful and friendly, at least stereotype-wise? Pg 3, "thought her commanding officer was a bit of a buffoon." Whoa, name whiplash. At the same time, I am very relieved because I thought that this entire story was going to not say the name of the protagonist and I was very concerned. I'm hoping this next part will go much smoother, since I found the prologue frustrating and confusing, and not as mysterious as you may have been hoping for. Pg 3, " her highly classified mission" How did he become a commanding officer if he can't even follow basic protocol/common sense? What is the mission? Pg 3, "natural underground chasms" Not a spaceship, then. Pg 4, "She didn’t pack anything" So, she's leaving, but doesn't need her firearms? I'm so used to first person or third person limited that not knowing what is going on inside of a character's head is jarring. Is she excited for her mission? Worried? frustrated? Pg 4, "dropped it off with Colonel" Names that might not matter because she is leaving? Pg 4, " family matters seemed a ridiculous notion to her" That's pretty cold. With her bare room and this opinion, C seems to be very focused. Pg 4, "was one of the underground cities on Venus" Having this in parentheses throws me off and jars me out of the story. Pg 4, "conspicuous, heavy, and highly restrictive" Are we talking like a million layers for hot weather, or a million layers for fashion? Pg 5, "she heard her name" Her C name or her T name? Pg 5, " stood up to face her sister." Wait, N is her sister? Somehow that flew over my head earlier. Probably me just being tired. Pg 5, " ticked her questions off on her fingers," My questions as well. Pg 5, "fixed a cold gaze on her sister." Not sensing a lot of love between these two... Pg 5, "mom and dad" They're names should be capitalized. Pg 5, "a little too hard; she was dizzy for a second there" Past injury? Pg 6, " hug her little sister" From the way that they were talking, I thought N was the little sister as in a couple of years younger but still a teenager/adult. I wasn't picturing an actual child small enough to bend down for a hug for. Pg 6, "the chemistry teacher" Are they teaching chemistry to six year olds? Pg 6, " she mumbled to herself under her breath" I mean, I definitely have heard little kids curse like this but it is really shocking, rare, and very confusing. Especially since she obviously knows what it means and isn't parroting. I have no clue what age this kid is and it's causing me a lot of confusion. There's also a lot of missing description: are they in an underground crater, how are they flying ships if they are underground, what color is the rock? Is it smooth, bumpy, etc? Natural? Concrete? Pg 7, "especially after what happened" Which was...? Pg 8, "some kind of wrap around her head" Okay, cool, got that clothing description I wanted earlier! Pg 8, "what are you doing here?" I'm not invested in the characters, the world, or the story enough to relive the same scene again. The emotions of the other person should be strong enough that we don't need the same conversations from different POVs. The only time I'm okay reliving a scene is 1) it's a time travel book 2) it's a side book overlapping with a main book (ie,Mistborn: Secret History overlaps with the main Mistborn series, or in Anne McCaffery's Pern series, the Masterharper of Pern overlaps with Dragonflight). Hmmm, N seems like a fun nerd character, but I'm stuck on her exact age (high school), while C seems like a cold, military woman with strong goals. Strong animosity between the sisters, which could be interesting, but I'm curious to see how that is played out considering C has left. I wish I could see more of the world. I want to know who Murdering Lady is.

The family luck continues. My mother texted me this: "Now Dad started a fire on the back side of the property on accident trying to smoke out squirrels. Thankfully I was by the house spraying round up and I sprinted over (with 3 gallons of RoundUp which is HEAVY by the way) and was able to put it out before it got too big. Thankfully the squirrel hole was under a fairly green manzanita with little grass around. Now I can't breath though and who knows how much RoundUp smoke I breathed in. Ugh. I hate this day. I also lost $50 of RoundUp." I want to strangle my Dad because I know he knows better, and, come on, we just had two major fires a year and a half ago. In good news: My Mom has been accepted into the auditions for Shark Tank! Whether or not she makes it is questionable...they turn 40,000 yearly applicants into 250 show contestants. But she is excited!

So, my AC might be broken, but my sister wins. Underage drunk driver with expired insurance hit my sister's car at 3:30am last night. Pushed her car into their garage and shoved everything two feet to the back. Cracked the foundation of the apartment (you can see the lifted wall if you look closely at the front tire). My sister's roommate/best friend made a citizen's arrest because kid was trying to flee. My sister, with my family's usual resilience, has come to peace with losing her first car (frame is bent, car's totalled) and has decided to make the bumper into a light fixture. She's just relieved that the driver hit her car and not the neighbor's vintage muscle car.

This sounds like Kentucky, which was gorgeous and miserable. Going to an outdoor model horse convention in July was not one of my greatest ideas.

Yeah, peak of summer gets above 120° F/49°C, and I've definitely ridden horses in that. What makes it bearable is the fact that we have almost no humidity. If the humidity gets above 30% I sweat like a mule, no matter the temperature outside. I freeze when it gets below 60°F/15.5°C and have to wear gloves.

In my neverending string of mishaps... My AC just gave up the ghost. Thankfully, it'll only be around 95°F/35°C for the next couple of days, instead of 110°F/43°C like it was earlier this week. Hopefully that will get fixed sooner than later.

I'm highly opinionated, what can I say? I like babies like I like puppies: to play with then return to the parent. I am so much better with older children than parents.

Dude, dog products are awesome, and pride things are so colorful and joyful! You've definitely got better ads than me.

Huggies doesn't need my money. Also...why do I get Huggies commercials? I don't look up babies. I don't babysit. I am scared of babies because they look so fragile. They puke and poop everywhere and cry incessantly. Babies are like puppies, they are cute if owned by others. Is it because I'm woman and am young enough to pop out squealing prunes from between my legs? Cause it certainly isn't based off of my search history. Like, jeez, with the amount of time I look up horse stuff and model horses, come on, at least give me State Line Tack or Dover Saddlery ads.

Yay! I don't think I've ever seen my brownie recipe cut out so nice and neat! I'm a heathen who cuts out a chunk out of the pan with a knife whenever I want a piece. Ate 3/4 of a pan by myself last week. @Robinski TheDwaryOne can't email you a brownie, but I can give you the recipe: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1V6oTIO3VZTd4hKXmACiPdWOsYJ0NRo8NYWsFf7lp27A/edit?usp=drivesdk @TheDwarfyOne Are we talking real cookies, or computer cookies? Cause if you got a cookie recipe you're hiding from me, I want it, and if it is a computer cookie - why do all the websites bother me with them!!! So frustrating with the pop-ups!

Aw snap! That's so cool! Thanks for trying to get a photo!

Same. I have noticed that I start almost every single paragraph with the POV character's name, or some character's name, if it isn't a description paragraph. You know how when you look at a word too long it looks wrong? I get that, some I have a habit of overusing names because when I see "she" or "her" too much, it's, like, all I see and I become very self conscious and start using names more. Turns out that's a bad instinct. You all are horrible. It's like you guys keep waving this delicious brownie under my nose but not quiiiiiiiiite letting me have it. I feel like Lancelot in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, shouting, "Foul temptress!"

I would like this!

Since you want impressions, I'm going to ignore any grammar mistakes unless something is so bad I can't figure out what the sentence is saying (which I doubt will happen). Thoughts as I go: Pg 1, "using his curiously-headed staff as a traveling aid" I wonder what the top of the staff looks like? Pg 1, " single tail ending in a sharp blade," If someone doesn't get stabbed by a lizard tail, I may be disappointed. Pg 1, “Concern. Faith. Relief.” What does T's voice sound like? Is it smooth, silver-tongued, tempting? Or is it gravely and low? High pitched and squeaky? Pg 2, "The top had three equidistant bars jutting out," A description! I wonder if Z has ever used his staff for a coat rack? Pg 2, "flaring his wings to avoid getting tossed." Does T just sense emotions, or does he eat them? Pg 3, " a spear covered in silver-leaf" Hmmm...silver to fight the beasties? Pg 3, "we need every useful pair of hands we can get" Ouch. So Z's job isn't very useful after an attack. And apparently he doesn't count as a useful pair of hands. Boy can run, but I don't think he'd be very good at doing the carpentry this town seems to need. Pg 5, "were a dark red or a rusty brown" Blood? Pg 5, "she’s in no danger right now" Until that blade tail wraps around her throat...I wonder why T doesn't like witches? Do all of his kind hate witches, or does he have a personal grudge? Pg 6, " that doesn’t like witches" So T has a grudge. That answers my question. Pg 6, "don’t use moon’s light. Every set of hands helps, except for his." Interesting...I wonder exactly what they mean by moon's light? Pg 7, " he wants to be there" Why does T want to be there, then? Pg 7, "we don't have the supplies" I would have assumed that by supplies they meant food, except I know they have enough food to send him on his way. Clean water is probably not a concern from the fords. Don't have bed space? Pg 9, " I was some insane maniac who preferred it when people died." Ouch. Witches sure do have a reputation. Pg 9, "I am one of the good ones." Interesting...so the good Witches are all a part of one singular group? Or is it more of a title a Witch can earn? Obviously there are few if Z can pick out her name. Pg 10, " right next to the riverbend" Beasties don't like water, or running water? That explains why a village would be built between two fords. Pg 11, "She glowed faintly from her use of moon’s light" I wonder what powers the moon can grant? Pg 11, "He inclined his head to show respect" Since Z is showing respect, I am going to revise my earlier assumption that she was also a Witch. Magical bard, maybe? Pg 11, "I can play you a song that will let you work far longer than you should." Okay, so the light can be used to affect others. Can be used on oneself? Pg 12, "Their songs were both versatile and powerful" Hold up, is K then a part of a guild? How many different types of light weaving are there? How long do the effects last? Pg 16, "there’s barely a moon in the sky" Page one said that the moon is almost full. Whoops. Pg 17, " don’t use the power of moon’s light." Can anyone? It doesn't seem so... Pg 20, "Please don’t tell me that you encountered any other kind?" I wonder how many kinds there are... Pg 22, "already knows who it is." Nice cliffhanger! I want to keep reading! I haven't read your other Z&T story, but I enjoyed this. I don't need a lot of action to get me into a story, as enough interesting worldbuilding is enough to keep me reading for at least a couple of chapters into a new book. I'm currently into Chapter 7 in a new book I'm reading and barely anything has happened, but I'm enjoying the world and characters and there's just enough questions and answers to keep me around. So, for me, was this a slower beginning? Yes. Would I have read the next chapter? Yes. I have questions (How did Z meet T? What exactly is a S----r? What exactly is R? Who is H? What do the guilds do? What else can the light do? What are the beasties? Do people become blinded in the light of day? Is there something special about the staff? Why can't Z use the light? Can anyone use the light?) and if I didn't start receiving some answers by Chapter 2 or 3, that's when I might get frustrated. My favorite character was T, and I felt I needed to get to know Z a little more before I decide whether or not I like him. I'm unclear on both his profession and his motivations, and he doesn't have as strong as a personality as, say, H, who whams you with personality straight out the gate. I'm not great at picking out themes (I BSed my way through themes in English class, much like finding meaning in art), so I'm just going to nod along with what the others say.