Lunamor

Ok, thank you for the feedback! This dude is a random guy who won't be showing up again, so I think he's ok without a name. I'll definitely consider reducing the amount of directions, that's helpful to know. Thanks for the feedback!

I've started to try and write a novel (and hopefully not ditch it this time!). So far, I've completed the prologue, and would really appreciate some feedback on how it could be improved. I'm not sure if it is too short or not. It's meant to serve as a hook that will later be explained by the mystery surrounding a core element of the plot being solved. (Spoilered for length)

Sounds great! So long as Eza doesn't think she is hurting anyone (to her, stealing doesn't really count unless she deems it mean), she could definitely be won over. She'd need to be paid in something other than money since she doesn't really care about it, but I've come up with an idea to circumnavigate that pretty easily. In what area would Asylum be?

Does anyone have any recommendations on where my character, Eza, can start off? I'd like to make sure she is somewhere where she will soon end up interacting with other characters. She is currently in the Mistwarrens, but I can justify her being other places because she likes to go "find" (steal) shiny things. She'd be willing to help anyone who seems nice and can also be tempted/won over with shiny things or the opportunity to get/steal some. She also is new to the Alleycity, so she basically has no idea what is going on (as do I). @Ookla of whimsy mentioned that Eza could fit in with their character Asylum. Here's her character sheet if it helps for reference:

Thank you!

My namesake is tall, proving that I am deserving of the win!

I would like to submit my character Eza for approval.

I can’t hear you over the sound of me winning!

Now your record is ten minutes!

Unhappy

Thank you! I mostly wanted to make sure that it would make sense for someone to randomly wander into Alleycity and that the merits/flaws are balanced. Ok, thanks!

You almost won for five minutes!

Granted. You are now retaking elementary school. I wish for all pants to have pockets.

The Inquisitor- Only made up of stolen content from the other websites

Lunamor stepped outside of the kitchen and watched this interaction intently. He couldn’t afford a major slip-up immediately after being threatened by that storming health inspector.

Lunamor had no idea what the powder was. Dreamsmith had been proven reliable so far, though… ”This stew, I think he is good. Thank you for preparing him.”

Lunamor nodded, dumping some cremlings on the counter. He stepped back, but not very far. Lunamor wanted to make sure the stew was of the highest quality.

“…no.” Lunamor rooted around in the kitchen for a moment. ”Would cremlings work?”

I am making a character, and would please like some feedback. Advice on how to ensure my character fits within the Alleyverse setting would be especially helpful.

“I… have never heard of Roughs stew. Is he a stew with extra shells?” Lunamor was a bit embarrassed by not knowing what a certain type of stew was.

Granted. Every time you hit your funny bone you start laughing uncontrollably and it doesn’t stop until you stub your toe. I wish for the ability to jump twice as high.

I logged into the Shard from a computer for the first time in a while, and just now saw that I have posted in this thread 3101 times. Yeesh.