Kestrel

I'm looks-like-a-stale-slice-of-bread-and-can't-be-noticed-ever.

Denny's tumblr is the only good blog on that site, if I'm being completely honest. We're watching Star Wars in english. Wild. I love college literature.

Ah yes. Something I will never have. I love relationships.

A solid 24 hr mental breakdown. I swear I went through all five stages of grief except acceptance.

My day yesterday started with me leaving a touch late and not being able to find a parking spot at school. It only went downhill from there.

Avyra nudged her horse forward, the gentle gelding shaking his head in annoyance. The night made everyone in her party weary, it seemed. Kyella, hooded, rested on her gloved left hand, uneasy despite being unable to see. Avyra would be lying if she felt at ease. She didn't expect to find people here, but that was okay with her. All she needed was a trusty horse and her golden eagle. Horse for travel, eagle for food. It had worked for her so far. Stopping, she silenced her horse's hooves to listen, just to make sure her mind wasn't playing tricks on her. Were those voices? Curious, she made her way forward, close enough to see a group of shadowed figures around a fire. They appeared to have just met. How odd. She slid down from her horse, huffing to herself as such an action revealed her real height, and stalked forward, Kyella's huge talons tightning slightly on her fist. "What brings a large group like yourselves out here?" She asked, her voice even, non-confrontational, but not weak.

Apparently my mom has tried to get in touch with one but they've never responded. Also if I did it myself, I'd have to probably pay for it. And I work minimum wage. There is one at school but. Idk if she can help. I went to her once, she seemed okay but very busy. I just. No one will want me. Anywhere. I'm just a hazard. I'm a little slow and very negative. I'm easy to trip on. I don't have any real good skills for working.

Everything positive about me is a lie and I'm never gonna be good enough, is the problem.

Idk if i can actually do this because I haven't actually. Finished wot. But. I'll try.

I had a blood test six months or so ago but they didn't find anything wrong. I've been trying to see a therapist for a while now but nope. I worry its something else but. No way of knowing so. Oh well.

Thanks guys. I appreciate it. I just. Don't know the steps to making me feel better. And just.

I'm 18. Nothing about my personal appearance is gonna change. And yes, people do forget me. Nobody notices me. I'm treated like a child. People assume I'm a freshman in high school. Its insulting. I can't even get angry without being laughed at because its "cute." I just. Can't bring myself to believe its true because ultimately I feel like its not.

I don't know. But none of that "art talent" even matters. I'm not going into art because I'll never get the job. Ever. Unless I want to work at some silly little advertising studio in the middle of no where. I have no reason to continue, period. And honestly I'd kill for three more inches. Then I'd at least be average. And less likely to be pushed about and forgotten.

DUDE THAT SOUNDS GREAT

I hate myself. I truly hate myself so much and I know I need to practice "self love" or whatever to get rid of it but I can't because there's literally nothing to love. I'm ugly as all get out. Only 5'3 and will probably never grow anymore. My face is too round. I'm only "cute" and never actually "beautiful." I want to be taken seriously in life but that will never happen when I'm elbow height with everyone else. No one wants me, I'm just something to intimidate and kick around. I have no actual talents. I'm mediocre at everything. My grades are mediocre my art is mediocre my animation is mediocre... I can't focus on anything and learn really slow to the point where I just teach myself because listening to other people never helps because I can't wrap my head around what they're saying quite right. When I don't understand something I just shut down and don't do it because I know I will never be able to. I just. There's nothing here. I hate it and I hate it and. There's nothing I can do.

I think the place to post it is in the rp subforum.

Go for it. Seems fun.

Eagles are cool Harpy eagle and ornate hawk eagle

I am so tired. I need a new job because we aren't making labor and I haven't been getting good hours.

Lol! Anyway, does anyone have ideas to start this off? I'm bad at starters. Also what's our plot

I never was able to finish. So much filler. I might start where Sanderson finished it off.

I must say, Avyra is thankful that mostly everyone seems to be under 6', lol

What sort of plot do we want as well?

I woke up at 4 and have been unable to sleep. But now I'm getting sleepy again and its almost time to get up.

Av can go anywhere.