TwiLyghtSansSparkles

I can do that. Any objections, Voidus?

He hurt someone Funtimes likes. Once she processes the fact that he mined the museum and isn't blaming her for taking control of him, she won't be happy with Lightwards.

That's fine. And yes, they are indeed the resident experts.

"YOU TOOK CONTROL OF MY BODY?" Silence blanketed the alley. Nathan could only stare. Even the unicycle man had stopped circling, and the other two servants watched nervously. Only Remington seemed capable of movement: He chuckled, shook his head, and gave a low whistle. Several looks flitted across Funtimes' face: confusion, horror, amusement, and finally worry. "I didn't do that," she said at last.

Post 433: Nathan, his confidence bolstered by an unlikely friendship with Remington, stands up on the coffee table and shouts "I'M NOT AN EPIC! SUCK ON THAT, LIGHTWARDS!" before introducing him to his little friend the machine gun. In all seriousness, I expect the other Epics to grow increasingly suspicious of a teleporter who doesn't go anywhere without his girlfriend (who, in fairness, is not someone I'd want to explore war-torn Portland without) and doesn't amuse himself by tormenting his servants. I for one welcome this legal defense.

The logic isn't bad, it just led him to the wrong conclusion. And if it weren't for the fact that Epics are extremely arrogant folk, I'd wonder why more didn't do exactly that.

Yeah, Lightwards. That's his secret. And Doctor Funtimes is a resurrected, cross-dressing Napoleon Bonaparte who acts insane to disguise his military genius. Good detective work there.

Your proposal is acceptable. FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT!!!!!

GM's orders: If that beard dies, it must be in a tragic scene, preferably a heroic sacrifice that leaves even Steelheart in tears. How can he cry if he's in Newcago and doesn't know what's going on in Portland? He will sense a great tragedy and be moved to tears. The guy wearing the beard, on the other hand.....

I think so.

So are we going with happy chatter about PP's hat, or a violent introduction to the raptors?

She has not yet found an enemy worthy of the hamster ball. Any candidates?

Eh, if it falls from the sky Funtimes can just turn it into a giant hamster ball and use it to literally crush the other factions.

I don't know. Fortuity strikes me as an easily distracted guy. Like, he'd drive his motorbike into a wall because a pretty girl walked by. And then blame Wall-E for putting that wall there.

I haven't looked at the label for their [REDACTED], but I got some frozen macaroni once. Sugar. Bowl of chicken wonton soup? Sugar. I think the only things they don't put sugar in are non-edible things like toilet paper (because that's just weird), herbal tea, plain chips, and meat. So it wouldn't surprise me at all if they added sugar to their [REDACTED]. Come to think of it, would that make our dear Mobius sweet? Also, I'm not sure where the Nathan-as-a-ginger idea got started, but….I like it. Especially since he's traveling with someone he calls Doctor. He is officially a ginger.

While chanting a rhyme about its [REDACTED] from a series called [REDACTED]. I knew it was the fakest, cheapest [REDACTED] I could find because TJ's puts sugar in EVERYTHING. And I mean EVERYTHING. Even wontons. Who DOES that?

I saw this on a car outside Trader Joe's today. SO IT BEGINS.

Good question. If Funtimes sees him, she'll just run over and hug him, chattering about his hat while Nathan tries to distract their servants by asking if any of them know any useful skills. The other two, anyway. The usefulness of Remington and Unicycle Guy has already been established.

Am I next?

Because the hat is so awesome, it has yet to find someone truly worthy of being its OTP.

Would that make it technically a dialogue?

And yet becomes a complete fan favorite because even if she can't build a proper stage, she's still awesome.