The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[Voidspawn he/him]

But the cupcakes were safe with the Fellowship. While Nameless might have stopped, the cupcakes worked tirelessly to destroy him.

[NameIess]

Meanwhile, Nameless had entered into heated negotiations with the inter-dimensional society of cupcake bakers regarding their ridiculous recipe requirements.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

They refused to budge. Forty six cups of flour, one milligram of sugar, three point zero zero seven two zero four eggs, and a candy cane was how they'd been making cupcake batches for generations, no, EONS.

[NameIess]

Nameless pointed out that unless they allowed variation in the baking of cupcakes, someone would eventually decide to start making “super-cupcakes” that were basically just cupcakes with a slightly different recipe.

[Voidspawn he/him]

The bakers pointed out that Nameless, without having a Name, must therefore not exist and ignored his comment altogether.

Edited January 5, 2022 by Voidspawn

[NameIess]

Nameless was foiled by this logic and decided to try a new strategy. Hiring an avatar. He put up posters around all seven of the seas, advertising the need for an avatar that had a name.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Nobody answered Nameless's pleas. Except a rather hungry swordfish, who attempted to eat the flyers with a side of eggs and bacon.

[NameIess]

Nameless decided to make an avatar instead of hiring one. First he needed a name.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

A piece of paper with the word, "Potato" blew by in the wind.

[NameIess]

Nameless decided to name his new avatar "Moni" short for "Moniker".

[Voidspawn he/him]

'Moniker' was killed in the first 10 seconds of existing.

[NameIess]

A few hundred deaths gave avatars a nice sense of mortality.

[Voidspawn he/him]

But all computer-simulated things aren't mortal. They will live on for eternity.

[NameIess]

Which would be relevant if Moni was computer-simulated. Fortunately, Moni was forged by the mind of a narrator, and was thus only conditionally immortal.

[Voidspawn he/him]

But minds are but more advanced computers. There is no escaping immortality, Moni.

[NameIess]

Nameless glared at Void, then erased Moni's memories of the conversation and continued on with his preparations.

[Voidspawn he/him]

Void wouldn't be defeated so easily. He spoke the magic words ("Dormammu! I've come to bargain!") and turned back time to stop Nameless from erasing Moni's memories,

[NameIess]

Nameless grabbed the time stone from Void, crushed it into dust, and used the dust to wipe Void from the timeline.

[Voidspawn he/him]

But (Loki Spoilers) 

Spoiler

that made Nameless a Variant and the TVA came to arrest him and brought back Void.

 

[NameIess]

Nameless ignored the so called "interdimensional time police" and finished up imbuing Moni with an unbreakable sense of mortality.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

The other narrators watched this strange cognitive battle while eating popcorn that Sequence had soulcast out of potato bugs.

[NameIess]

Nameless grabbed Sequence and Moni and handcuffed them together so that Moni could get an important life lesson from a narrator besides Nameless.

Edited January 6, 2022 by Nameless

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Sequence stared at moni, and started screaming at the top of their lungs.

[Robin Sedai she/her]

Robin applauded. "Very important life lesson."

[NameIess]

Nameless watched apprehensively.