The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Just now, BringerofShadows said:

Tom Joebob got an hatchet to the chest. 

Ember grabbed the hatchet out of the air. It crumbed to ash in her hand. 

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

1 minute ago, Shard of Thought said:

Ember shook her head as the fog cleared. Then, she began walking following nothing but instinct. She had to find Tom Joebob.

But cheered. He had saved Tom Joebob before, and had been waiting patiently for him to return.

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Then the real hatchet hit Tom Joebob in the face. His soul was also sent to the 7th layer of Hell. 

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

Which was actually Threnody

[+Ark1002]

Not the Cosmere Threnody. No, the Epic named Threnody.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Just now, BringerofShadows said:

Then the real hatchet hit Tom Joebob in the face. His soul was also sent to the 7th layer of Hell. 

Ember ripped away the greenscreen. The "Seventh Layer of Hell" - including Threnody - was really just a Hollywood set. She disintegrated the once-hatchet and teleported Tom back to his ship. Ember looked at the man she had just saved.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

He was terrifying

edit: ninja’d

Edited June 3, 2019 by Truthless of Shinovar

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Just now, Truthless of Shinovar said:

He was terrifying

But so was Ember. And she didn't feel fear.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

2 minutes ago, BringerofShadows said:

Then the real hatchet hit Tom Joebob in the face. His soul was also sent to the 7th layer of Hell. 

Tom Joebob laughed even more maniacally as his body put itself back together.

Then he ran off, to do his own business.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

Oh, I was talking about Threnody the Epic

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Just now, xinoehp512 said:

Tom Joebob laughed even more maniacally as his body put itself back together.

Then he ran off, to do his own business.

Ember grabbed his neck before he could. Her touch didn't burn him. She pulled him back to her.

"I need you," she said tersely.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

2 minutes ago, xinoehp512 said:

Tom Joebob laughed even more maniacally as his body put itself back together.

Then he ran off, to do his own business.

But ran after him with a vial in hand

edit: gah!! Ninja’d again by Thought!!

Edited June 3, 2019 by Truthless of Shinovar

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Tom Joebob managed to jump off the boat and drown. (Possibly with some help from BoS)

Edited June 3, 2019 by BringerofShadows

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Just now, BringerofShadows said:

Tom Joebob managed to jump off the boat and drown. (Possibly with some help from BoS)

But it was a flying ship. Ember caught his wrist before he fell. 

[BringerofShadows she/her]

But his hands were covered in oil so it slipped right through. He fell to his death.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

2 minutes ago, BringerofShadows said:

Tom Joebob managed to jump off the boat and drown. (Possibly with some help from BoS)

 

Just now, Shard of Thought said:

But it was a flying ship. Ember caught his wrist before he fell. 

Hmmmm.... can one drown in air? Perhaps Tom Joebob is actually a fish...

[xinoehp512 he/him]

Or, at least, supposed death.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Just now, BringerofShadows said:

But his hands were covered in oil so it slipped right through. He fell to his death.

The ocean was turned into a trampoline. He bounced right back up into Ember's arms.

Just now, xinoehp512 said:

Or, at least, supposed death.

 

[BringerofShadows she/her]

He bounced past Ember, and a harpoon speared him through the face.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

Just now, BringerofShadows said:

He bounced past Ember, and a harpoon speared him through the face.

He promptly reformed. That was a nice feature.

[lillylyantha she/her]

I am back from the hole of reddit

 

and arizona

Edited June 3, 2019 by Dedspren

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

Welcome back!

And @BringerofShadows, with all due respect, may I ask why your Narrator is so bent on destroying everybody in the thread? The reason is probably stated back in the thread somewhere, but I’m lazy

 

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

1 minute ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Welcome back!

And @BringerofShadows, with all due respect, may I ask why your Narrator is so bent on destroying everybody in the thread? The reason is probably stated back in the thread somewhere, but I’m lazy

 

It didn't, she's just like that. 

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Because. That’s how I find joy. He reformed as a dead corpse.

Edited June 3, 2019 by BringerofShadows

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

1 minute ago, BringerofShadows said:

Because. That’s how I find joy. He reformed as a dead corpse.

He the First became the first zombie, but was immediately incinerated.

In other words, Tom was unharmed.

Edited June 3, 2019 by Shard of Thought