[OB] Funny moments in Oathbringer

[Alfa he/him]

8 hours ago, lonelymagician said:

......you take your upvote and get out, you terrible person.

I'm not only getting out, I'm running out.

[SmurfAquamarineBodies he/him]

On 11/19/2017 at 7:57 PM, signspace13 said:

To Me one of the funniest moments is When the Stormfather gets genuinely angry at the Night Watcher/Cultivation for what she did in making Lift, he seems Mad that she isn't restricted by the storms and the "She goes to Far!" line had me laughing, as well as Dalinar's downright confusion as too why his spren was suddenly sulking.

 

That entire exchange makes me ship the Stormfather and Night watcher.

2 hours ago, Alfa said:

I'm not only getting out, I'm running out.

No.

[Necessary Eagle she/her]

There's something darkly humorous about when Dalinar is shouting his sins to the sky, immediately after "YOU CANNOT HAVE MY PAIN!" Odium can't get a word in sideways, Dalinar just keeps talking right over him.

[Leyrann]

1 hour ago, SmurfAquamarineBodies said:

That entire exchange makes me ship the Stormfather and Night watcher.

We're shipping spren now, as well?

[bo.montier]

6 hours ago, Alfa said:

I'm not only getting out, I'm running out.

Should've gone with "Don't give me the boot"

Edited November 20, 2017 by bo.montier
Spelling

[StormingTexan he/him]

Quote

 

“The evil force that rules the palace did not think highly of someone coming with a letter from the king.” She smiled at him. “You could say, um, it made that point quite clear.” Smile. I need you to smile. I need what happened to be all right. Something that can simply roll off me. Please. “Well…” Kaladin said. “I’m glad we … took a stab at this anyway.”

Sanderson, Brandon. Oathbringer: Book Three of the Stormlight Archive (p. 636). Tom Doherty Associates. Kindle Edition. 

 

R.I.P. Shalladin.. 

 

[Bacon]

Something about the offhandedly dismissive way that Taravangian said:

"And someone kill those children"

[Awesomness]

Shallan and her safehand (and safehands in general) should be mentioned here. 

[christianlathaire]

Adolin: We certainly are an odd bunch.

Pattern: Yes. Seven People. Odd.

Nothing goes over these guys' heads. Their reflexes are too fast. They would catch it.

[AbsentKeeper he/him]

Bridge Four:

Quote

“Yeah,” Lopen added. “Drehy likes other guys. That’s like … he wants to be even less around women than the rest of us. It’s the opposite of feminine. He is, you could say, extra manly.”

Quote

“See, Brightness?” Leyten said. “New recruits might get bored by guard duty, but you’ll never find a veteran complaining about a nice quiet afternoon full of not being stabbed.”

Lift:

Quote

It didn’t have any Stormlight, which was good, since one that big would have been bright. Like, redder and brighter than Gawx’s face when Lift told him about how babies was made. He should know stuff like that already. He’d been a starvin’ thief! Hadn’t he known any whores or anything?

 

Quote

Wyndle—who she knew by now was almost certainly not a Voidbringer

(Finally!)

Nightblood:

Quote

“And what is evil, sword-nimi?”

I’m sure you can spot it. You seem smart. If increasingly kind of boring.

Also everything Pattern says, I think all of those have already been posted though 

Edited November 20, 2017 by Cowmanthethird
I accidentally made one of those quote boxes a spoiler box instead.

[SmurfAquamarineBodies he/him]

9 hours ago, Leyrann said:

We're shipping spren now, as well?

Oh yea. It got out of hand last time, oops.

[gbazz4 he/him]

Been said before, but i like the whole sequence in Chapter 13:

“Oh!” Pattern said suddenly, bursting up from the bowl to hover in the air. “You were talking about mating! I’m to make sure you don’t accidentally mate, as mating is forbidden by human society until you have first performed appropriate rituals! Yes, yes. Mmmm. Dictates of custom require following certain patterns before you copulate. I’ve been studying this!”

“Oh, Stormfather,” Shallan said, covering her eyes with her freehand. A few shamespren even peeked in for a glimpse before vanishing. Twice in one week.

“Very well, you two,” Pattern said. “No mating. NO MATING.” He hummed to himself, as if pleased, then sank down onto a plate.

....

He leaned down. His breath smelled of spices, his uniform of the crisp, clean starch Dalinar required. His lips touched hers, and her heart fluttered. So warm.

“No mating!”

She started, pulling out of the kiss to find Pattern hovering beside them, pulsing quickly through shapes.

[IntentAwesome]

Kaladin, scariest of monsters:

Quote

Even surrounded by monsters, the bridgeman could still look intimidating. 

 

[+robardin he/him]

On 11/15/2017 at 1:58 PM, Leyrann said:

"What? Now? I was saving that for a dramatic moment!"

"Why didn't you listen earlier? We were, sure, all about to die and things!" 

YOU WEREN'T QUITE READY.

 

[+robardin he/him]

15 hours ago, Alfa said:

I'm not only getting out, I'm running out.

Don't fool yourself. Clearly you were BOOTED out.

[Stairdweller he/him]

Rock introducing his children.

"This is Rock jr., different kind of rock, small rock..."

[shawnhargreaves he/him]

I'm amazed nobody has brought up Szeth playing paintball yet.

I loved Lift.  Meet Dalinar for the first time, and comment on him having a tight arse.  And, when asked if she brought a weapon, “Nope. Can’t read.”

[summers]

On 11/20/2017 at 9:39 PM, robardin said:

Don't fool yourself. Clearly you were BOOTED out.

This needs to stop.

[Alfa he/him]

2 hours ago, summers said:

This needs to stop.

Or you will stomp down with your boot leg?

[Podman]

No. I’m putting my boot down on this. No more. 

[+robardin he/him]

40 minutes ago, Ookla the Conflusled said:

No. I’m putting my boot down on this. No more. 

I'll try, but it's a hard habit to kick.

[GoddessIMHO]

The scene on the wall when the hole is letting in the troops. Adolin is giving orders about what everyone needs to do to prevent this. Suddenly there is a big noise and Jasnah completely repairs the wall in one swoop of her hand.

Adolin looks at the wall, then "OK, new plan".

[Ammanas]

When Jasnah is pontificating to her mother and Navani thinks to herself

Here we go.

Lectured by my own daughter again.

 

I think you have to be a parent to see the humor in it

 

Edited December 1, 2017 by Ammanas

[Lord Spiral]

Quote

“Storms, boy. What did you do? Hit a lighteyes?”

“Yes,” Kaladin said. Then punched him.

He bashed Roshone right in the face. A solid hit, exactly like Hav had taught him. Thumb outside of his fist, he connected with the first two knuckles of his hand across Roshone’s cheekbone, then followed through to slide across the front of the face. Rarely had he delivered such a perfect punch. It barely even hurt his fist.

I let out a whoop when reading/ hearing that (audiobook). It was just so deserved. And delivered in slow motion too.

[Subvisual Haze]

On 12/1/2017 at 1:28 PM, Ammanas said:

When Jasnah is pontificating to her mother and Navani thinks to herself

Here we go.

Lectured by my own daughter again.

 

I think you have to be a parent to see the humor in it

 

One thing I really like about Jasnah is that she's an advanced enough know-it-all nerd to realize that she's doing this, but she still can't stop herself completely.  (This from someone who still keeps a running tally in his head about how many questions he has answered in any class or meeting with a strictly self-enforced STOP TALKING cutoff).

Here's a goofy one I somehow missed the first time through, when the Shadesmar crew is hiking to Thaylen City and Shallan is lagging behind the extremely in-shape soldier guys:

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Without Stormlight, Shallan trailed farthest behind, Pattern at her side.  Exhaustionspren circled in the air above, like large chickens.

Large chickens circling exhausted people.... Shallan literally has vultures flying in circles above her head like a cartoon character