Silverblade5 he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Also, after the glass is drunk, the milk explodes. If you do come up against anyone trying to make fun of you for it, you might try tilting your head thoughtfully, tapping your chin like you're pondering something, and then tell them that you're sorry, but they're going to have to be at least 20% cooler before they can effectively mock you. I've gotta say, this one really made my day. You really are the forum mom Kaymyth.
Kestrel she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Nah actually don't do that If someone harasses you, don't do any of that fru-fru motions or wordplay. Straight up say "its my life, my choice, you don't have to like it." and leave. 3
Kaymyth she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 I've gotta say, this one really made my day. You really are the forum mom Kaymyth. I lived the life of the awkward nerdy kid in the first half of the 90s. It's been 20 years, but I still remember how miserable high school was. I'm just glad that we have the internet now, and the next generation of awkward nerdy kids have the rest of us for support. 1
Orlion Blight he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Nah actually don't do that If someone harasses you, don't do any of that fru-fru motions or wordplay. Straight up say "its my life, my choice, you don't have to like it." and leave. Correct. It's a cartoon preference, not a battle to preserve the Holy Land. If some people give you guff, it is to get a reaction from you and score points with other people than you. Wordplay or otherwise does not change that dynamic and gives your erstwhile bullies exactly what they want.
Kaymyth she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Correct. It's a cartoon preference, not a battle to preserve the Holy Land. If some people give you guff, it is to get a reaction from you and score points with other people than you. Wordplay or otherwise does not change that dynamic and gives your erstwhile bullies exactly what they want. I respectfully disagree, at least slightly. Ignoring bullies does NOT make them go away. It only makes them more determined to poke you until you explode. Though granted, I'm not sure that witticisms are the answer, either; a lot depends on the social dynamics of the individual people involved. But there's something about the ignoring tactic that actually makes it worse; the attempt to not react actually projects an air of weakness - after all, if you had the strength to defend yourself, you'd be doing it, right?
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 I respectfully disagree, at least slightly. Ignoring bullies does NOT make them go away. It only makes them more determined to poke you until you explode. Though granted, I'm not sure that witticisms are the answer, either; a lot depends on the social dynamics of the individual people involved. But there's something about the ignoring tactic that actually makes it worse; the attempt to not react actually projects an air of weakness - after all, if you had the strength to defend yourself, you'd be doing it, right? One way to combat this? Show them you don't care. Wear pony shirts to school. Watch episodes on your phone. Make the theme song your ringtone. Like Dalinar said in WoR, scorn has only the bite you give it. 2
Kaymyth she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Thank you, Twi! Double-posting is bad, mmkay, and this deserved its own piece. Things That Are True: 1 - We tore out all of the carpet in the old house over the weekend. Ugh, that was a job. 2 - Went to Ikea on Sunday for the first time. That place isn't nearly as confusing as I was led to believe. We bought a bed! 3 - I am le tired. 4 - I am getting a haircut tomorrow. I do not intend to lose much overall length (my hair is just about down to my waist), but I do want layers. That'll lighten up the hair weight and give my thick, fine-textured hair a little life at the top. 5 - Babylon 5 is awesome. 6 - I got told today, "You know, Ivanova sounds like you sometimes." I'm pretty sure that should've been said the other way around. But still, best. compliment. ever. 1
Orlion Blight he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 One way to combat this? Show them you don't care. Wear pony shirts to school. Watch episodes on your phone. Make the theme song your ringtone. Like Dalinar said in WoR, scorn has only the bite you give it. This is pretty much where I stand. "Ignoring" is not showing weakness, it's showing it does not matter. I feel that once you enter a combative situation, you create an enemy, a focus for hate... and as James Baldwin said: “Hatred, which could destroy so much, never failed to destroy the man who hated, and this was an immutable law.”
Silverblade5 he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Thanks for the advice everyone. TBH, I was kind of scared that if and when it ended up starting, I'd end up pulling a Fluttershy from Putting Your Hoof Down simply because that's happened pretty often in the past.
Kaymyth she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 This is pretty much where I stand. "Ignoring" is not showing weakness, it's showing it does not matter. I feel that once you enter a combative situation, you create an enemy, a focus for hate... and as James Baldwin said: “Hatred, which could destroy so much, never failed to destroy the man who hated, and this was an immutable law.” But what Twi suggested isn't actually ignoring - it's something else. When I was a kid, everyone always told me to ignore the teasers. Only I couldn't, because I couldn't convince them that I truly didn't care, not really. I couldn't stop the emotional reaction, and it would show - my face would flush, my jaw would clench, and they knew they had me. Trying to tell a teenager to not have an emotional reaction is sort of like telling a mountain to not be so vertical. But all that? Wearing the fandom on your sleeve outright and shoving it in their faces? That's something completely different. That's saying, "You see this thing you think is dumb? Yeah, here it is. Right here. Come and get it." It's a challenge. It's a war cry. Instead of trying to quietly tiptoe past them, you're trumpeting your arrival and daring them to cross the line. It creates an entirely different psychological dynamic. 2
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 But what Twi suggested isn't actually ignoring - it's something else. When I was a kid, everyone always told me to ignore the teasers. Only I couldn't, because I couldn't convince them that I truly didn't care, not really. I couldn't stop the emotional reaction, and it would show - my face would flush, my jaw would clench, and they knew they had me. Trying to tell a teenager to not have an emotional reaction is sort of like telling a mountain to not be so vertical. But all that? Wearing the fandom on your sleeve outright and shoving it in their faces? That's something completely different. That's saying, "You see this thing you think is dumb? Yeah, here it is. Right here. Come and get it." It's a challenge. It's a war cry. Instead of trying to quietly tiptoe past them, you're trumpeting your arrival and daring them to cross the line. It creates an entirely different psychological dynamic. The same thing happened to me when I was a teen, except instead of getting angry, I'd start to cry, which is even worse. But when I stopped being shy about what I liked? They shut up about it. Because their one weapon—the shame I would've felt at being exposed—was gone. Just like that.
mail-mi he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 The Emerald City: The cities are always greener on the other side.
Kestrel she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 (edited) I respectfully disagree, at least slightly. Ignoring bullies does NOT make them go away. It only makes them more determined to poke you until you explode. Though granted, I'm not sure that witticisms are the answer, either; a lot depends on the social dynamics of the individual people involved. But there's something about the ignoring tactic that actually makes it worse; the attempt to not react actually projects an air of weakness - after all, if you had the strength to defend yourself, you'd be doing it, right?No, you don't ignore it, you defend yourself, and do it right so they'll leave you alone. If you try to be cute and smart, you'll just trip over yourself and act even more flustered, giving them what they want: more material to tease you more. Flat out tell them to stop. If you don't give them any content they want they'll eventually leave you alone.Edit: (forgot to add) but really though, I've found that bullying at the high school level is not as big as they make it to be. Its bullying in middle school that's bad. Because everyone is getting out of elementary and are confused, trying to climb their way to the top of the social ladder, and some of the kids decide "wow! Maybe if I pick on this kid who is different than the normal crowd, I'll get more popular!" They do it for insecurity. In high school, once the groups are "laid out," I rarely see it happen. Now, I might not be at the right place, but this is just an observation of mine. Now fights, fights happen at my school a lot. Edited August 11, 2015 by LarkoftheRiver
Kobold King he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Author Posted August 11, 2015 I am a world class con artist. I trick convenience store clerks into giving me tasty snack foods in exchange for worthless green pieces of paper. Sometimes, if the numbers printed on the paper are big enough, they'll even give me some shiny coins to play with while I have my snack! Oh yeah. I'm such a badchull. 6
The Honor Spren she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 But really though, I've found that bullying at the high school level is not as big as they make it to be. Its bullying in middle school that's bad. Because everyone is getting out of elementary and are confused, trying to climb their way to the top of the social ladder, and some of the kids decide "wow! Maybe if I pick on this kid who is different than the normal crowd, I'll get more popular!" They do it for insecurity. In high school, once the groups are "laid out," I rarely see it happen. Now, I might not be at the right place, but this is just an observation of mine. Now fights, fights happen at my school a lot. I'm starting high school tomorrow, and I am so glad I never had to go through this stuff. I have been homeschooled for almost 7 years now, and will hopefully stay that way through high school, thank you very much. (Even though I still will have early morning seminary. . . )Possibly a new discussion topic: Have you ever eaten peanut butter with a spoon? 1
Blaze1616 he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 (edited) Possibly a new discussion topic: Have you ever eaten peanut butter with a spoon? Heck yes! You know what goes great with that? Some maple syrup. Yum! Just be sure to keep the ratio of syrup to peanut butter in favor of the peanut butter. Edited August 11, 2015 by Blaze1616 1
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Heck yes! You know what goes great with that? Some maple syrup. Yum! Just be sure to keep the ratio of syrup to peanut butter in favor of the peanut butter. *dons hipster glasses* My snack of choice happens to be dry-roasted and salted pumpkin seeds, mixed with a handful of dried cherries. 3
The Honor Spren she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Heck yes! You know what goes great with that? Some maple syrup. Yum! Just be sure to keep the ratio of syrup to peanut butter in favor of the peanut butter.When I was 5, I had a special spoon, just for eating creamy Peter Pan peanut butter straight out of the jar . . . Or at least that's what I used it for. 2
Blaze1616 he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 *dons hipster glasses* My snack of choice happens to be dry-roasted and salted pumpkin seeds, mixed with a handful of dried cherries. Then it sounds like we're approaching the perfect time of year for your snacking habits!
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Then it sounds like we're approaching the perfect time of year for your snacking habits! Indeed. 2
Kestrel she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 (edited) I'm starting high school tomorrow, and I am so glad I never had to go through this stuff. I have been homeschooled for almost 7 years now, and will hopefully stay that way through high school, thank you very much. (Even though I still will have early morning seminary. . . ) Possibly a new discussion topic: Have you ever eaten peanut butter with a spoon? Okay so tips in high school- stay in your lane - do not hang out in the halls please dont it blocks them. Get to where you're going as fast as possible - pack your lunch even if it means getting up earlier like seriously you'll thank me - have a cut-off time for homework. I normally do 7 or 8 in the evening. Get plenty of sleep. - do not wait until last minute to do your work holy crap get your stuff together - be involved in extra-curriculars like band, sports, clubs, orchestra, etc. you'll make tons of friends who are interested in the same things! - if teacher says read textbook or watch video you get home and DO IT. - have an hour or so between when you get home to when you start your school work. - try to take more advanced classes. You can always drop down. Do not be ashamed to drop down. - be nice to your teachers it won't make you a teacher's pet really - try to take interesting classes - you don't need a ton of friends to make it through. Even if you aren't popular you can still have a small and tight group. - if you see a fight happen KEEP WALKING FOR THE LOVE OF GOD BC IF THE ADMINISTRATORS SEE YOU YOULL GET DRAGGED just avoid it Edited August 11, 2015 by LarkoftheRiver 3
Silverblade5 he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Okay so tips in high school - stay in your lane - do not hang out in the halls please dont it blocks them. Get to where you're going as fast as possible - pack your lunch even if it means getting up earlier like seriously you'll thank me - have a cut-off time for homework. I normally do 7 or 8 in the evening. Get plenty of sleep. - do not wait until last minute to do your work holy crap get your stuff together - be involved in extra-curriculars like band, sports, clubs, orchestra, etc. you'll make tons of friends who are interested in the same things! - if teacher says read textbook or watch video you get home and DO IT. - have an hour or so between when you get home to when you start your school work. - try to take more advanced classes. You can always drop down. Do not be ashamed to drop down. - be nice to your teachers it won't make you a teacher's pet really - try to take interesting classes - you don't need a ton of friends to make it through. Even if you aren't popular you can still have a small and tight group. - if you see a fight happen KEEP WALKING FOR THE LOVE OF GOD BC IF THE ADMINISTRATORS SEE YOU YOULL GET DRAGGED just avoid it Lark, I agree with you, on all but that last one. If I see a fight, or if I see any kind of bullying, I'm damnation well going to do something about it. Especially if it's one of my friends. To me, standing by doing nothing would feel much worse than any consequence. 2
Kestrel she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Lark, I agree with you, on all but that last one. If I see a fight, or if I see any kind of bullying, I'm damnation well going to do something about it. Especially if it's one of my friends. To me, standing by doing nothing would feel much worse than any consequence. fighting=/=bullying.If there's people throwing punches then honestly stay out of it. Because that's the only form of violence that the administration seems to care about. They don't do anything about bullying. But if its a fight then they will intervene. 2
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 Let it be known that I have decided to decorate my bathroom with a Harry Potter theme. I will buy towels in House colors and will attempt to find a good HP themed shower curtain. I already have blue things for my kitchen, so I'm thinking that'll be easy to work into a Doctor Who theme. 3
Curious Anamaximder he/him Posted August 11, 2015 Posted August 11, 2015 (edited) Where do you live, Honorspren? You are starting school tomorrow? Edited August 11, 2015 by Venture Mistborn
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