Mental health club!

[Vielence She/Her]

6 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

i am not okay

and the worst part is

I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY

#repressedtrauma4ever!!!

 

*stabbies to make a leak so no repression so there*
*then hugs*

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

6 minutes ago, echo74 said:

*HUG*

NO REPRESSING

TAKE HUGS INSTEAD

IF YOU DONT KNOW WHY, WE CAN FIGURE IT OUT

NO REPRESSING

IT ALREADY HAPPENED T^T

5 minutes ago, VieB13 said:

*stabbies to make a leak so no repression so there*
*then hugs*

oh my blood is leaking

[Vielence She/Her]

1 minute ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

IT ALREADY HAPPENED T^T

oh my blood is leaking

No ‘‘twas a special stab so only repression leaks. 

[echo74 she/her]

7 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

IT ALREADY HAPPENED T^T

oh my blood is leaking

NO IT DIDN'T

WHAT HAPPENED? WHY SAD?

DID YOU DRINK WATER? DID YOU EAT FOOD? DID YOU SLEEP? DID YOU SHOWER? DID YOU GO OUTSIDE TODAY?

*HUG*

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF I DEMAND IT

[Vielence She/Her]

3 minutes ago, echo74 said:

NO IT DIDN'T

WHAT HAPPENED? WHY SAD?

DID YOU DRINK WATER? DID YOU EAT FOOD? DID YOU SLEEP? DID YOU SHOWER? DID YOU GO OUTSIDE TODAY?

*HUG*

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF I DEMAND IT

This is an excellent friend response just pointing that out

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

1 hour ago, VieB13 said:

*HUGS* I also have trust issues. I get it. *hugsss more*

Growing up DOES suck 

This is true 

*hugs back* thanks

1 hour ago, echo74 said:

*hugs*

hey, it's not your responsibility to take care of everyone

and it's not your fault that you struggle with trusting others

but there are ways out of it, yk?

just start small, okay?

you're being way too hard on yourself

no yeah and the crush thing i get

like you want them but you cant have them

and your brain doesnt understand why you cant have them so you blame yourself

your pain is totally valid, and if you want to talk abt it more, my pms are always open

*HUGS*

sorry if that was too much

*hugs back*

I know, it just perfectly lines up with my trauma like two waves of the same frequency.

59 minutes ago, VieB13 said:

No, no I don’t either everybody on here I know has been repping all my stuff

Yes I know. I WAS FINALLY KINGS WIT AND NOW IM NOT. 

-no I will never be over this I can hold a grudge for a long time. 

NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FELT

51 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

i am not okay

and the worst part is

I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY

#repressedtrauma4ever!!!

 

*hugs*

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

2 hours ago, VieB13 said:

No ‘‘twas a special stab so only repression leaks. 

oh ok *wound magically heals* all better now

2 hours ago, echo74 said:

NO IT DIDN'T

WHAT HAPPENED? WHY SAD?

DID YOU DRINK WATER? DID YOU EAT FOOD? DID YOU SLEEP? DID YOU SHOWER? DID YOU GO OUTSIDE TODAY?

*HUG*

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF I DEMAND IT

I DONT KNOW

THATS WHY ITS REPRESSED

CAUSE I DONT KNOW

i think just life thou

and school

2 hours ago, Kansas Stormcursed said:

*hugs back* thanks

*hugs back*

I know, it just perfectly lines up with my trauma like two waves of the same frequency.

NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FELT

*hugs*

*hugs*

[echo74 she/her]

4 hours ago, Kansas Stormcursed said:

*hugs back* thanks

*hugs back*

I know, it just perfectly lines up with my trauma like two waves of the same frequency.

NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FELT

*hugs*

*HUGS again*

thats actually a really cool way of putting it and yeah that makes sense

just know that you're not stuck

and that you're freaking awesome

and i know that doesn't fix anything but just know that we care about you and that you are not broken

not even a little bit

2 hours ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

oh ok *wound magically heals* all better now

I DONT KNOW

THATS WHY ITS REPRESSED

CAUSE I DONT KNOW

i think just life thou

and school

*hugs*

sounds like burnout

*HUG*

it could be from a wide variety of things but that stuff is really tough and it doesn't just "go away"

and like sometimes you're doing fine and then you're just hit with that wave of exhaustion

is it like that?

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

1 hour ago, echo74 said:

*HUGS again*

thats actually a really cool way of putting it and yeah that makes sense

just know that you're not stuck

and that you're freaking awesome

and i know that doesn't fix anything but just know that we care about you and that you are not broken

not even a little bit

sounds like burnout

*HUG*

it could be from a wide variety of things but that stuff is really tough and it doesn't just "go away"

and like sometimes you're doing fine and then you're just hit with that wave of exhaustion

is it like that?

Thank you

Very much

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

1 hour ago, echo74 said:

*HUGS again*

thats actually a really cool way of putting it and yeah that makes sense

just know that you're not stuck

and that you're freaking awesome

and i know that doesn't fix anything but just know that we care about you and that you are not broken

not even a little bit

sounds like burnout

*HUG*

it could be from a wide variety of things but that stuff is really tough and it doesn't just "go away"

and like sometimes you're doing fine and then you're just hit with that wave of exhaustion

is it like that?

Not really

its like sadness

and probably a bit of burnout too

[NerdSandwich she/her]

idk whats wrong with me but i don't rly get burnout

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

19 hours ago, Kansas Stormcursed said:

*hugs back* thanks

*hugs back*

I know, it just perfectly lines up with my trauma like two waves of the same frequency.

NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FELT

*hugs*

*hugs*

12 hours ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Not really

its like sadness

and probably a bit of burnout too

*hugs*

[MirkerLurker she/her]

 

On 10/29/2025 at 8:29 PM, KnightSkye Reforged said:

Hey guys.

I have a little bit of a rant.

Please note that the shard auto corrects the four letter word to storm whenever it is typed. I would ask that you read it as such.

Sorry.

  Reveal hidden contents

I mentioned a few months ago, and a few weeks ago, that through various reasons I lost contact with a friend so close I called her my sister.

I finally learned that the reason for this was that she and her husband were having communication issues in their marriage, and the way that our church session decided to deal.with fixing that,was too remove anyone super close to either of them so they would be forced to focus on each other more.

Unfortunately for me, I was really close to both of them, though closer to her. 

I am not the only person that was cut out, just the first, and the one who asked the most questions about it.

That was the first reason I was cut off from her. The second –and according to all involved lesser– reason was that a bunch of people thought we were, "getting closer than anyone not married should be." I was also told that I had to remember I was, "not really her sister."

Not only were these statements false and hurtful, they are frankly slander against both myself and her.

To be clear, what sparked these concerns was the fact that we had a lot of physical contact (hugs, and I would lean against her shoulder a lot) and that we talked a lot about things other people there weren't familiar with (the cosmere). 

She was also the person who first got me to talk about my depression, and more importantly, my self harm. 

 

I am going to be honest,and I'm sick of being nice about it.

Her husband stormed up when he told us all (and thought to himself) that he didn't really need people all that much and that he was fine.

My sister stormed up when she didn't tell me ahead of time that she was a mandated reporter, especially since she shared the same information about herself with me and I kept it a secret like she asked.

She stormed up when she knew God was asking her to change and she didn't tell me anything or invite me to pray with her. 

She stormed up when she chose to go along with this after having sworn to me to stick with me even when things got hard. To be there for me when I needed her.

They both stormed up big time and I am especially angry with them because I am barely an adult and have been being forced to do this same growth and fix the same type of mistakes for the past year, and now they can't even get it together enough to keep there word.

And I am not allowed to talk about this with either of them. No resolution is allowed.

My youth pastor stormed up by saying those statements about how close we were. He still believes that, and I don't know if that makes me hate him or pity him.

My pastor stormed up in the way he told her she wasn't allowed to talk to me anymore. He told her, and not me, after church, after my parents had left and I was going to go hang out at her house for the rest of the day, that we weren't allowed to talk to each other, touch in any way, And I was banned from her house. 

My parents were both busy, so neither of them could come pick me up and she wasn't allowed to drive me back to my house. I ended up staying at the church the rest of the day.

He told her all this, then left. She had to deal with tears and pain and shock ALONE, NOT ALLOWED TO SEEK HELP FROM ME, HER stormING BROTHER AND A GODDAMN WINDRUNNER. SHE HAD TO DEAL WITH ALL OF IT, THEN TELL IT TO MY FACE.

and I do hate him for that cowardice and disgrace.

The session has said they will "reevaluate the situation" at the end of the school year.

 

That was three months ago.

I am going to collage next year. I had hopped I would be making this new change in life with people I could trust and depend upon behind me.

My mom told me yesterday that I need to stop moping and get a move on. That I am not growing enough and need to get better. That I needed to figure where I was going to collage or get kicked out.

 

I'm still avoiding thinking about life, though that won't work forever. I'm sad cause my family is already planning for Christmas, and at the same time my mum is telling me to keep researching colleges, and get dates for tours. The girl I have a crush on asked me to write her a letter three months ago and I did, and she hasn't responded (which I know might be fine but still feel bad). I am spending about half my energy every day and night on controlling the pent up explosive burning rage and desire to protect my family, sister, and reputation. I am exhausted all the time cause when I do finally get to sleep, most of the time I have nightmares, and when I wake up I am quite literally in a nightmare. That of having lost some of my family. I'm tired of feeling that everything I love is slowly slipping away and I will wake up one morning a few months from now and not recognize myself. 

I liked the man I had become. I liked him. He was honest, and bold, and noble. He did things that he was scared of. He really looked like a knight radiant. 

I'm sad and scared I'm losing that man. That I'm slipping back to the broken angry boy who couldn't cry cause he ran out of tears. Who didn't care what others thought of him because he hated himself and everyone else by extension. The boy who is bitter and selfish.

I'm scared that in the end I will disappoint everyone else and end up scared and alone, and live by myself and have no one I love and can trust.

 

I am going to collage next year. My sister had promised me she would still talk to me online, and call. She had sworn that a couple weeks in, when the homesickness really kicked in, that she would visit in person, no matter where I was.

It feels that no one will keep their promises. The world doesn't give a storm about a man's word. Hell, even the church doesn't seem to care.

I had finally started enjoying life. I had started liking my life, even though there were a bunch of hard days. 

Now every day is hard.

@Tam Tucker, I feel your advice about this might be helpful.

Other people who commented:

Spoiler

On 10/30/2025 at 8:24 AM, Just A Silvereye said:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

  Reveal hidden contents

Sidenote: I am religiously agnostic so my perspective might be biased

But am I the only one absolutely terrified by what your church is doing here? Forcibly cutting people from each other - how are they even allowed to do that? Or to enforce this ? I have genuinely never heard of religious organizations with such a level of control on attendants' private lives

And lets not even get into the notion that cutting people off most of their closest friends helps them somehow

This is insane

 

 

On 10/30/2025 at 8:54 AM, Hoid Slayer said:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

  Reveal hidden contents

No, you are not the only one

 

 

On 10/30/2025 at 9:03 AM, Kansas Stormcursed said:

  Reveal hidden contents

  Reveal hidden contents

You are definitely not the only one

 

 

On 10/30/2025 at 10:00 AM, SpartanBrigade said:

  Hide contents

Yeah I'm not agnostic, I'm also Christian and that's genuinely horrifying 

*hugs*

 

On 10/30/2025 at 10:44 AM, Hawks said:

 

  Hide contents

  Hide contents

You’re not the only one. Even as a somewhat Christian this whole situation is bull.

 

 

 

 

Hey guys, Mirker here. It’s been a while. 

Sorry to drag up an older post. If I tagged you, it's because you commented on what I'm addressing, but you can skip this, and anybody else can skip this too. I'll spoiler it for length and to not drag the whole thread into this.

Spoiler

I would like to add a little bit of info to this, and to do that, I need to first identify myself:
I am the friend Skye is talking about here.

There’s a lot here and I’m not trying to turn a public forum into a platform for an argument and drama, but I also recognize that Skye’s comments spotlight some of the mistakes of a church trying to help its members, and I’d like to add a little bit of info about that, perspective I have that Skye doesn’t, so that those of you looking at and judging the church have more info to judge by. I’m not here to defend myself, just my church.

Firstly, the “Please stop having contact for a while” that was put on myself and Skye came after over a year of conversation and smaller requests. Poor communication and lack of understanding between myself, my husband, my pastor, and my youth pastor yielded continued conversation, continued frustration, and finally culminated here. Telling us to separate wasn’t a sudden spur-of-the-moment action, nor was it the first go-to action. It was more of a last resort action.
Secondly, our pastor and youth pastor also don’t like this. They believe it’s necessary for where we are now; but they are grieved and upset over this. That might seem contradictory, but as a parent, I can empathize with finding yourself in a place where you feel your best course of action is still one that causes pain. A course that could have been avoided if things had been different earlier, but now, with where we are, it becomes necessary.

That connects to my third point: There is acknowledgement on all sides that this should have been handled better, by all parties. I’ve had numerous conversations with our pastor and youth pastor in the wake of this, sorting through my anger and hurt over it. The youth pastor is struggling with guilt over things he misunderstood (not the things that Skye mentioned, but other connected things), things he said in past conversations that he now looks at and sees was wrong advice, actively unhelpful counsel. Our pastor said to me that looking back at how this issue has been handled over the past year, he would do almost all of it differently if he could.

The church, the elders involved, noticed that something was unhealthy. Without close knowledge of the people involved, it took time and mistakes and misunderstandings to better identify what, but guys?
They were right.
I was screwing up, and I didn’t realize it. There’s multifold reasons for that, some on me, some not on me, but at the end of the day, I was failing to love my husband and my kids, and also failing to love Skye well, even though he hadn’t seen it yet. There was unhealthiness that I didn’t tell Skye about because I thought it was normal; there was discomfort and loneliness in my husband that I didn’t notice; and there was loneliness and struggles in my kids that I wasn’t dealing with.

The church noticed something wrong, and made attempts to help. Were they the right attempts? No. Did those fumbled attempts hurt a lot? Yes.
But in the end, they’ve also shone light on issues I have that I haven’t been handling well and need to work on more. And since that’s happened, that work has been happening, and it’s been incredibly good. Painful, humbling, and good.
And Skye, being close to me, is affected by my screw-ups, and is suffering for it.
So TLDR, I’m a flawed person, and the people around me got caught up in it.
Welcome to being human. I messed up, and it wasn’t just me that got hurt for it, it was everyone around me too. Skye, my husband, my kids, my pastor, my youth pastor. I hate that.

A smaller note, with an example of poor communication resulting in pain:
No one meant for Skye to end up abandoned at the church after that conversation. When I left him there, it was after a phone call with his parents where they said “Yes, we’re coming to pick him up.” I don’t know what caused them to not be able to. If they’d said ‘no we can’t come get him’, my husband would have driven Skye home. We weren’t banned from that; strongly discouraged from spending time with him, yes. But I would never have left him there, and our pastor would never have insisted we leave him there; that was never intended.
The only reason I left him alone at all, rather than staying with him until his parents got him, was that I didn’t want to make him sit in painful silence with me *there*, but unable to talk about it. I could at least give him space away from me to process. That was probably also a mistake.

 

So anyway. The church gets a bad reputation; I’d like it to at least have an honest one. The mistakes are made with good intent. What conclusion you draw from that is up to you.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

*hugs*

religion is complicated.
While I don't agree with all the decisions made in this situation, I feel bad for all of you. Both of you please just remember that everyone is imperfect-maybe your pastor, maybe your friends, and maybe even yourself. The important thing is that I think that most people are TRYING to be good. I do not believe that it is our responsibility to judge others and point out their misdeeds. I think that our job is to love first.

This is a tricky situation, and my only real advice (as a really old freshman  ) is to keep trying. Maybe it will be hard at some points.

But someday, somewhere, no matter what your religion is (or lack of one thereof), I do believe that you will be warm again.

Remember that you are already amazing-and just keep trying.

@KnightSkye Reforged

@MirkerLurker

Edit: If I said something offensive, please let me know.

Edited November 17, 2025 by YouCantHaveMySandwich

[Keke They/he]

33 minutes ago, MirkerLurker said:

Hey guys, Mirker here. It’s been a while. 

Haiii welcome back

 

33 minutes ago, MirkerLurker said:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

I would like to add a little bit of info to this, and to do that, I need to first identify myself:
I am the friend Skye is talking about here.

There’s a lot here and I’m not trying to turn a public forum into a platform for an argument and drama, but I also recognize that Skye’s comments spotlight some of the mistakes of a church trying to help its members, and I’d like to add a little bit of info about that, perspective I have that Skye doesn’t, so that those of you looking at and judging the church have more info to judge by. I’m not here to defend myself, just my church.

Firstly, the “Please stop having contact for a while” that was put on myself and Skye came after over a year of conversation and smaller requests. Poor communication and lack of understanding between myself, my husband, my pastor, and my youth pastor yielded continued conversation, continued frustration, and finally culminated here. Telling us to separate wasn’t a sudden spur-of-the-moment action, nor was it the first go-to action. It was more of a last resort action.
Secondly, our pastor and youth pastor also don’t like this. They believe it’s necessary for where we are now; but they are grieved and upset over this. That might seem contradictory, but as a parent, I can empathize with finding yourself in a place where you feel your best course of action is still one that causes pain. A course that could have been avoided if things had been different earlier, but now, with where we are, it becomes necessary.

That connects to my third point: There is acknowledgement on all sides that this should have been handled better, by all parties. I’ve had numerous conversations with our pastor and youth pastor in the wake of this, sorting through my anger and hurt over it. The youth pastor is struggling with guilt over things he misunderstood (not the things that Skye mentioned, but other connected things), things he said in past conversations that he now looks at and sees was wrong advice, actively unhelpful counsel. Our pastor said to me that looking back at how this issue has been handled over the past year, he would do almost all of it differently if he could.

The church, the elders involved, noticed that something was unhealthy. Without close knowledge of the people involved, it took time and mistakes and misunderstandings to better identify what, but guys?
They were right.
I was screwing up, and I didn’t realize it. There’s multifold reasons for that, some on me, some not on me, but at the end of the day, I was failing to love my husband and my kids, and also failing to love Skye well, even though he hadn’t seen it yet. There was unhealthiness that I didn’t tell Skye about because I thought it was normal; there was discomfort and loneliness in my husband that I didn’t notice; and there was loneliness and struggles in my kids that I wasn’t dealing with.

The church noticed something wrong, and made attempts to help. Were they the right attempts? No. Did those fumbled attempts hurt a lot? Yes.
But in the end, they’ve also shone light on issues I have that I haven’t been handling well and need to work on more. And since that’s happened, that work has been happening, and it’s been incredibly good. Painful, humbling, and good.
And Skye, being close to me, is affected by my screw-ups, and is suffering for it.
So TLDR, I’m a flawed person, and the people around me got caught up in it.
Welcome to being human. I messed up, and it wasn’t just me that got hurt for it, it was everyone around me too. Skye, my husband, my kids, my pastor, my youth pastor. I hate that.

A smaller note, with an example of poor communication resulting in pain:
No one meant for Skye to end up abandoned at the church after that conversation. When I left him there, it was after a phone call with his parents where they said “Yes, we’re coming to pick him up.” I don’t know what caused them to not be able to. If they’d said ‘no we can’t come get him’, my husband would have driven Skye home. We weren’t banned from that; strongly discouraged from spending time with him, yes. But I would never have left him there, and our pastor would never have insisted we leave him there; that was never intended.
The only reason I left him alone at all, rather than staying with him until his parents got him, was that I didn’t want to make him sit in painful silence with me *there*, but unable to talk about it. I could at least give him space away from me to process. That was probably also a mistake.

 

So anyway. The church gets a bad reputation; I’d like it to at least have an honest one. The mistakes are made with good intent. What conclusion you draw from that is up to you.

Before i reply to everything first i will give *Hugs* And say that im bad at phrasing and anything written here is not meant to sound targeted or angry. Also these are my opinions, remember im not a professional just an empathetic friend.

Spoiler

While i understand where it came from. Is this permanent? Will you never be able to talk again? Cause, well i think this has just caused to much pain. Even if it’s just small talk and nothing more i think just talking should be allowed. having to cut someone out of your life even with warning when they are an important person will hurt like someone cutting out your heart. Is there any ANY way to help with the emotional pain others felt in this? I dont wanna see anyone hurt, you and your husbands relationship included. Even if it’s just like online interactions. Is there a compromise or something? Cause i think like you cant take unplug a dam and expect the person at the bottom to be able to swim. 

I dont hold any anger towards anyone in this situation, we are humans and make mistakes or lapse in judgment. 

 

[Vielence She/Her]

20 hours ago, Kansas Stormcursed said:

*hugs back* thanks

*hugs back*

I know, it just perfectly lines up with my trauma like two waves of the same frequency.

NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FELT

*hugs*

You’re welcome. 
Trauma waves are real. 
 

I do. Kinda. 

18 hours ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

oh ok *wound magically heals* all better now

I DONT KNOW

THATS WHY ITS REPRESSED

CAUSE I DONT KNOW

i think just life thou

and school

*hugs*

*hugssssss*

55 minutes ago, MirkerLurker said:

 

Other people who commented:

  Hide contents

 

 

Hey guys, Mirker here. It’s been a while. 

Sorry to drag up an older post. If I tagged you, it's because you commented on what I'm addressing, but you can skip this, and anybody else can skip this too. I'll spoiler it for length and to not drag the whole thread into this.

  Hide contents

I would like to add a little bit of info to this, and to do that, I need to first identify myself:
I am the friend Skye is talking about here.

There’s a lot here and I’m not trying to turn a public forum into a platform for an argument and drama, but I also recognize that Skye’s comments spotlight some of the mistakes of a church trying to help its members, and I’d like to add a little bit of info about that, perspective I have that Skye doesn’t, so that those of you looking at and judging the church have more info to judge by. I’m not here to defend myself, just my church.

Firstly, the “Please stop having contact for a while” that was put on myself and Skye came after over a year of conversation and smaller requests. Poor communication and lack of understanding between myself, my husband, my pastor, and my youth pastor yielded continued conversation, continued frustration, and finally culminated here. Telling us to separate wasn’t a sudden spur-of-the-moment action, nor was it the first go-to action. It was more of a last resort action.
Secondly, our pastor and youth pastor also don’t like this. They believe it’s necessary for where we are now; but they are grieved and upset over this. That might seem contradictory, but as a parent, I can empathize with finding yourself in a place where you feel your best course of action is still one that causes pain. A course that could have been avoided if things had been different earlier, but now, with where we are, it becomes necessary.

That connects to my third point: There is acknowledgement on all sides that this should have been handled better, by all parties. I’ve had numerous conversations with our pastor and youth pastor in the wake of this, sorting through my anger and hurt over it. The youth pastor is struggling with guilt over things he misunderstood (not the things that Skye mentioned, but other connected things), things he said in past conversations that he now looks at and sees was wrong advice, actively unhelpful counsel. Our pastor said to me that looking back at how this issue has been handled over the past year, he would do almost all of it differently if he could.

The church, the elders involved, noticed that something was unhealthy. Without close knowledge of the people involved, it took time and mistakes and misunderstandings to better identify what, but guys?
They were right.
I was screwing up, and I didn’t realize it. There’s multifold reasons for that, some on me, some not on me, but at the end of the day, I was failing to love my husband and my kids, and also failing to love Skye well, even though he hadn’t seen it yet. There was unhealthiness that I didn’t tell Skye about because I thought it was normal; there was discomfort and loneliness in my husband that I didn’t notice; and there was loneliness and struggles in my kids that I wasn’t dealing with.

The church noticed something wrong, and made attempts to help. Were they the right attempts? No. Did those fumbled attempts hurt a lot? Yes.
But in the end, they’ve also shone light on issues I have that I haven’t been handling well and need to work on more. And since that’s happened, that work has been happening, and it’s been incredibly good. Painful, humbling, and good.
And Skye, being close to me, is affected by my screw-ups, and is suffering for it.
So TLDR, I’m a flawed person, and the people around me got caught up in it.
Welcome to being human. I messed up, and it wasn’t just me that got hurt for it, it was everyone around me too. Skye, my husband, my kids, my pastor, my youth pastor. I hate that.

A smaller note, with an example of poor communication resulting in pain:
No one meant for Skye to end up abandoned at the church after that conversation. When I left him there, it was after a phone call with his parents where they said “Yes, we’re coming to pick him up.” I don’t know what caused them to not be able to. If they’d said ‘no we can’t come get him’, my husband would have driven Skye home. We weren’t banned from that; strongly discouraged from spending time with him, yes. But I would never have left him there, and our pastor would never have insisted we leave him there; that was never intended.
The only reason I left him alone at all, rather than staying with him until his parents got him, was that I didn’t want to make him sit in painful silence with me *there*, but unable to talk about it. I could at least give him space away from me to process. That was probably also a mistake.

 

So anyway. The church gets a bad reputation; I’d like it to at least have an honest one. The mistakes are made with good intent. What conclusion you draw from that is up to you.

*HUGSSSSSSSS SO MUCH*
Let us know if you need anything

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

2 hours ago, MirkerLurker said:

 

Other people who commented:

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

Hey guys, Mirker here. It’s been a while. 

Sorry to drag up an older post. If I tagged you, it's because you commented on what I'm addressing, but you can skip this, and anybody else can skip this too. I'll spoiler it for length and to not drag the whole thread into this.

  Reveal hidden contents

I would like to add a little bit of info to this, and to do that, I need to first identify myself:
I am the friend Skye is talking about here.

There’s a lot here and I’m not trying to turn a public forum into a platform for an argument and drama, but I also recognize that Skye’s comments spotlight some of the mistakes of a church trying to help its members, and I’d like to add a little bit of info about that, perspective I have that Skye doesn’t, so that those of you looking at and judging the church have more info to judge by. I’m not here to defend myself, just my church.

Firstly, the “Please stop having contact for a while” that was put on myself and Skye came after over a year of conversation and smaller requests. Poor communication and lack of understanding between myself, my husband, my pastor, and my youth pastor yielded continued conversation, continued frustration, and finally culminated here. Telling us to separate wasn’t a sudden spur-of-the-moment action, nor was it the first go-to action. It was more of a last resort action.
Secondly, our pastor and youth pastor also don’t like this. They believe it’s necessary for where we are now; but they are grieved and upset over this. That might seem contradictory, but as a parent, I can empathize with finding yourself in a place where you feel your best course of action is still one that causes pain. A course that could have been avoided if things had been different earlier, but now, with where we are, it becomes necessary.

That connects to my third point: There is acknowledgement on all sides that this should have been handled better, by all parties. I’ve had numerous conversations with our pastor and youth pastor in the wake of this, sorting through my anger and hurt over it. The youth pastor is struggling with guilt over things he misunderstood (not the things that Skye mentioned, but other connected things), things he said in past conversations that he now looks at and sees was wrong advice, actively unhelpful counsel. Our pastor said to me that looking back at how this issue has been handled over the past year, he would do almost all of it differently if he could.

The church, the elders involved, noticed that something was unhealthy. Without close knowledge of the people involved, it took time and mistakes and misunderstandings to better identify what, but guys?
They were right.
I was screwing up, and I didn’t realize it. There’s multifold reasons for that, some on me, some not on me, but at the end of the day, I was failing to love my husband and my kids, and also failing to love Skye well, even though he hadn’t seen it yet. There was unhealthiness that I didn’t tell Skye about because I thought it was normal; there was discomfort and loneliness in my husband that I didn’t notice; and there was loneliness and struggles in my kids that I wasn’t dealing with.

The church noticed something wrong, and made attempts to help. Were they the right attempts? No. Did those fumbled attempts hurt a lot? Yes.
But in the end, they’ve also shone light on issues I have that I haven’t been handling well and need to work on more. And since that’s happened, that work has been happening, and it’s been incredibly good. Painful, humbling, and good.
And Skye, being close to me, is affected by my screw-ups, and is suffering for it.
So TLDR, I’m a flawed person, and the people around me got caught up in it.
Welcome to being human. I messed up, and it wasn’t just me that got hurt for it, it was everyone around me too. Skye, my husband, my kids, my pastor, my youth pastor. I hate that.

A smaller note, with an example of poor communication resulting in pain:
No one meant for Skye to end up abandoned at the church after that conversation. When I left him there, it was after a phone call with his parents where they said “Yes, we’re coming to pick him up.” I don’t know what caused them to not be able to. If they’d said ‘no we can’t come get him’, my husband would have driven Skye home. We weren’t banned from that; strongly discouraged from spending time with him, yes. But I would never have left him there, and our pastor would never have insisted we leave him there; that was never intended.
The only reason I left him alone at all, rather than staying with him until his parents got him, was that I didn’t want to make him sit in painful silence with me *there*, but unable to talk about it. I could at least give him space away from me to process. That was probably also a mistake.

 

So anyway. The church gets a bad reputation; I’d like it to at least have an honest one. The mistakes are made with good intent. What conclusion you draw from that is up to you.

OMG YOUR BACK OMG I PHYSICALLY REACTED TO THIS IRL LOL MY FRIENDS WERE ASKING ME WHAT WAS WRONG HI YOUR BACK

[MirkerLurker she/her]

1 hour ago, Honors ghost said:

OMG YOUR BACK OMG I PHYSICALLY REACTED TO THIS IRL LOL MY FRIENDS WERE ASKING ME WHAT WAS WRONG HI YOUR BACK

that's really sweet, thank you. Hi!

I probably won't be on often, but yeah, I'm back!

3 hours ago, Hawks said:

Haiii welcome back

 

Before i reply to everything first i will give *Hugs* And say that im bad at phrasing and anything written here is not meant to sound targeted or angry. Also these are my opinions, remember im not a professional just an empathetic friend.

  Reveal hidden contents

While i understand where it came from. Is this permanent? Will you never be able to talk again? Cause, well i think this has just caused to much pain. Even if it’s just small talk and nothing more i think just talking should be allowed. having to cut someone out of your life even with warning when they are an important person will hurt like someone cutting out your heart. Is there any ANY way to help with the emotional pain others felt in this? I dont wanna see anyone hurt, you and your husbands relationship included. Even if it’s just like online interactions. Is there a compromise or something? Cause i think like you cant take unplug a dam and expect the person at the bottom to be able to swim. 

I dont hold any anger towards anyone in this situation, we are humans and make mistakes or lapse in judgment. 

 

I appreciate that you want to ask questions and help. But in this case, I'm going to keep working it out with just the people involved - talking to too many people and getting mixed messages and mixed opinions caused some of the poor communication that started all this  That's not a reflection on you though - thanks for asking!
No, not permanent, and yes, we can talk a little.

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

21 minutes ago, MirkerLurker said:

that's really sweet, thank you. Hi!

I probably won't be on often, but yeah, I'm back!

I appreciate that you want to ask questions and help. But in this case, I'm going to keep working it out with just the people involved - talking to too many people and getting mixed messages and mixed opinions caused some of the poor communication that started all this  That's not a reflection on you though - thanks for asking!
No, not permanent, and yes, we can talk a little.

aw man but still YAYAYAY

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

8 hours ago, MirkerLurker said:

 

Other people who commented:

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

Hey guys, Mirker here. It’s been a while. 

Sorry to drag up an older post. If I tagged you, it's because you commented on what I'm addressing, but you can skip this, and anybody else can skip this too. I'll spoiler it for length and to not drag the whole thread into this.

  Reveal hidden contents

I would like to add a little bit of info to this, and to do that, I need to first identify myself:
I am the friend Skye is talking about here.

There’s a lot here and I’m not trying to turn a public forum into a platform for an argument and drama, but I also recognize that Skye’s comments spotlight some of the mistakes of a church trying to help its members, and I’d like to add a little bit of info about that, perspective I have that Skye doesn’t, so that those of you looking at and judging the church have more info to judge by. I’m not here to defend myself, just my church.

Firstly, the “Please stop having contact for a while” that was put on myself and Skye came after over a year of conversation and smaller requests. Poor communication and lack of understanding between myself, my husband, my pastor, and my youth pastor yielded continued conversation, continued frustration, and finally culminated here. Telling us to separate wasn’t a sudden spur-of-the-moment action, nor was it the first go-to action. It was more of a last resort action.
Secondly, our pastor and youth pastor also don’t like this. They believe it’s necessary for where we are now; but they are grieved and upset over this. That might seem contradictory, but as a parent, I can empathize with finding yourself in a place where you feel your best course of action is still one that causes pain. A course that could have been avoided if things had been different earlier, but now, with where we are, it becomes necessary.

That connects to my third point: There is acknowledgement on all sides that this should have been handled better, by all parties. I’ve had numerous conversations with our pastor and youth pastor in the wake of this, sorting through my anger and hurt over it. The youth pastor is struggling with guilt over things he misunderstood (not the things that Skye mentioned, but other connected things), things he said in past conversations that he now looks at and sees was wrong advice, actively unhelpful counsel. Our pastor said to me that looking back at how this issue has been handled over the past year, he would do almost all of it differently if he could.

The church, the elders involved, noticed that something was unhealthy. Without close knowledge of the people involved, it took time and mistakes and misunderstandings to better identify what, but guys?
They were right.
I was screwing up, and I didn’t realize it. There’s multifold reasons for that, some on me, some not on me, but at the end of the day, I was failing to love my husband and my kids, and also failing to love Skye well, even though he hadn’t seen it yet. There was unhealthiness that I didn’t tell Skye about because I thought it was normal; there was discomfort and loneliness in my husband that I didn’t notice; and there was loneliness and struggles in my kids that I wasn’t dealing with.

The church noticed something wrong, and made attempts to help. Were they the right attempts? No. Did those fumbled attempts hurt a lot? Yes.
But in the end, they’ve also shone light on issues I have that I haven’t been handling well and need to work on more. And since that’s happened, that work has been happening, and it’s been incredibly good. Painful, humbling, and good.
And Skye, being close to me, is affected by my screw-ups, and is suffering for it.
So TLDR, I’m a flawed person, and the people around me got caught up in it.
Welcome to being human. I messed up, and it wasn’t just me that got hurt for it, it was everyone around me too. Skye, my husband, my kids, my pastor, my youth pastor. I hate that.

A smaller note, with an example of poor communication resulting in pain:
No one meant for Skye to end up abandoned at the church after that conversation. When I left him there, it was after a phone call with his parents where they said “Yes, we’re coming to pick him up.” I don’t know what caused them to not be able to. If they’d said ‘no we can’t come get him’, my husband would have driven Skye home. We weren’t banned from that; strongly discouraged from spending time with him, yes. But I would never have left him there, and our pastor would never have insisted we leave him there; that was never intended.
The only reason I left him alone at all, rather than staying with him until his parents got him, was that I didn’t want to make him sit in painful silence with me *there*, but unable to talk about it. I could at least give him space away from me to process. That was probably also a mistake.

 

So anyway. The church gets a bad reputation; I’d like it to at least have an honest one. The mistakes are made with good intent. What conclusion you draw from that is up to you.

*hugs*

[Throw TheLiving Silverware he/him/il/lui]

On 11/17/2025 at 7:39 PM, MirkerLurker said:

 

Other people who commented:

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

Hey guys, Mirker here. It’s been a while. 

Sorry to drag up an older post. If I tagged you, it's because you commented on what I'm addressing, but you can skip this, and anybody else can skip this too. I'll spoiler it for length and to not drag the whole thread into this.

  Hide contents

I would like to add a little bit of info to this, and to do that, I need to first identify myself:
I am the friend Skye is talking about here.

There’s a lot here and I’m not trying to turn a public forum into a platform for an argument and drama, but I also recognize that Skye’s comments spotlight some of the mistakes of a church trying to help its members, and I’d like to add a little bit of info about that, perspective I have that Skye doesn’t, so that those of you looking at and judging the church have more info to judge by. I’m not here to defend myself, just my church.

Firstly, the “Please stop having contact for a while” that was put on myself and Skye came after over a year of conversation and smaller requests. Poor communication and lack of understanding between myself, my husband, my pastor, and my youth pastor yielded continued conversation, continued frustration, and finally culminated here. Telling us to separate wasn’t a sudden spur-of-the-moment action, nor was it the first go-to action. It was more of a last resort action.
Secondly, our pastor and youth pastor also don’t like this. They believe it’s necessary for where we are now; but they are grieved and upset over this. That might seem contradictory, but as a parent, I can empathize with finding yourself in a place where you feel your best course of action is still one that causes pain. A course that could have been avoided if things had been different earlier, but now, with where we are, it becomes necessary.

That connects to my third point: There is acknowledgement on all sides that this should have been handled better, by all parties. I’ve had numerous conversations with our pastor and youth pastor in the wake of this, sorting through my anger and hurt over it. The youth pastor is struggling with guilt over things he misunderstood (not the things that Skye mentioned, but other connected things), things he said in past conversations that he now looks at and sees was wrong advice, actively unhelpful counsel. Our pastor said to me that looking back at how this issue has been handled over the past year, he would do almost all of it differently if he could.

The church, the elders involved, noticed that something was unhealthy. Without close knowledge of the people involved, it took time and mistakes and misunderstandings to better identify what, but guys?
They were right.
I was screwing up, and I didn’t realize it. There’s multifold reasons for that, some on me, some not on me, but at the end of the day, I was failing to love my husband and my kids, and also failing to love Skye well, even though he hadn’t seen it yet. There was unhealthiness that I didn’t tell Skye about because I thought it was normal; there was discomfort and loneliness in my husband that I didn’t notice; and there was loneliness and struggles in my kids that I wasn’t dealing with.

The church noticed something wrong, and made attempts to help. Were they the right attempts? No. Did those fumbled attempts hurt a lot? Yes.
But in the end, they’ve also shone light on issues I have that I haven’t been handling well and need to work on more. And since that’s happened, that work has been happening, and it’s been incredibly good. Painful, humbling, and good.
And Skye, being close to me, is affected by my screw-ups, and is suffering for it.
So TLDR, I’m a flawed person, and the people around me got caught up in it.
Welcome to being human. I messed up, and it wasn’t just me that got hurt for it, it was everyone around me too. Skye, my husband, my kids, my pastor, my youth pastor. I hate that.

A smaller note, with an example of poor communication resulting in pain:
No one meant for Skye to end up abandoned at the church after that conversation. When I left him there, it was after a phone call with his parents where they said “Yes, we’re coming to pick him up.” I don’t know what caused them to not be able to. If they’d said ‘no we can’t come get him’, my husband would have driven Skye home. We weren’t banned from that; strongly discouraged from spending time with him, yes. But I would never have left him there, and our pastor would never have insisted we leave him there; that was never intended.
The only reason I left him alone at all, rather than staying with him until his parents got him, was that I didn’t want to make him sit in painful silence with me *there*, but unable to talk about it. I could at least give him space away from me to process. That was probably also a mistake.

 

So anyway. The church gets a bad reputation; I’d like it to at least have an honest one. The mistakes are made with good intent. What conclusion you draw from that is up to you.

*huuuuuuugs*

I understand

I'm not sure if I agree, but I understand

 

And I really really really hope for all of you that you can sort this out

 

 

 

 

...okay I need to vent

and shout

Spoiler

I'm just so freaking tired of this school

they can't coordinate anything ever and can't pass any kind of useful info to anyone and just keep being so dumb every time

like, teachers can share a freaking teaching unit without being made aware of each other's existence

and this keeps coming back to bite us

and they all just keep giving us work and work and more work like they all had complete monopoly on our time

NO

I have only 24 hours a day and 7 days a week I can't do everything at once

Please stop

These days I have a massive project to return every other day

(not exaggerating, I had 2 finals last Saturday, a big project to return on Monday, another one on tomorrow Wednesday, another one on Friday, and another one due on Friday but which has been just moved to Sunday, and another final on Saturday)

Oh yeah, they also had this brilliant idea of Saturday classes, so we get even less time to work on all that and get even more tired

And today the teacher didn't understand why we didn't start working on his project that's due in 3 weeks

WELL GUESS WHY YOU MORON

IF I HAVE A WORK DUE FOR TOMORROW IT WILL TAKE PRIORITY OVER THE ONE FOR IN THREE WEEKS

AND WITH EVERYTHING YOU ARE GIVING US THERE IS ALWAYS A WORK DUE FOR TOMORROW

WE'LL GET TO THAT ONE WHEN ITS DUE FOR THE NEXT DAY BECAUSE THERES NO WAY WE CAN AFFORD THE TIME TO DO IT BEFORE

 

AND THEN WHEN IVE BEEN THROUGH MONTHS OF THIS AND IM A COMPLETE WRECK YOU COME ALL WORRIED AND YOURE LIKE "well what could we do to help" WELL IDK STOP BEING DUMB FOR ONCE THAT WOULD BE A GREAT START "ah no that won't be possible"

 

and look maybe i'm kinda biased on this because i've been burnt out for so long that i can't even remember what it's like to have a consistent work output

(that started before i came here but they certainly did their best to make it go worse all the time)

but at this point idk what to do

well i know

just tank it for some time

in 30 days i get my very last final ever

after that, a big project (yes another one) to do through january

(technically we're supposed to have been preparing it since september already but uuuh)

then some minimal administrative contacts to validate my internship and get my diploma

(though i wouldn't be surprised if even that turns into a nightmare, they're absolutely capable of this)

(at this point i just assume everything admin-related in here will turn into a mess both hilarious and excruciating)

(and i get pleasantly surprised when it works)

and after that i'm done

 

but i'm getting so tired

and i can't even get myself to work on the project for tomorrow

and then there will be the one after and another one and aother one and aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

 

i'm not sure how i'll be in 30 days tbh

but i'm getting really tired of needing 4 months of holidays for every 3 months of classes just to recover from it

 

... oh wow there's much less shouting than i expected

maybe i just don't have it in me to be so angry all the time

too tired

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

3 minutes ago, Just A Silvereye said:

*huuuuuuugs*

I understand

I'm not sure if I agree, but I understand

 

And I really really really hope for all of you that you can sort this out

 

 

 

 

...okay I need to vent

and shout

  Hide contents

I'm just so freaking tired of this school

they can't coordinate anything ever and can't pass any kind of useful info to anyone and just keep being so dumb every time

like, teachers can share a freaking teaching unit without being made aware of each other's existence

and this keeps coming back to bite us

and they all just keep giving us work and work and more work like they all had complete monopoly on our time

NO

I have only 24 hours a day and 7 days a week I can't do everything at once

Please stop

These days I have a massive project to return every other day

(not exaggerating, I had 2 finals last Saturday, a big project to return on Monday, another one on tomorrow Wednesday, another one on Friday, and another one due on Friday but which has been just moved to Sunday, and another final on Saturday)

Oh yeah, they also had this brilliant idea of Saturday classes, so we get even less time to work on all that and get even more tired

And today the teacher didn't understand why we didn't start working on his project that's due in 3 weeks

WELL GUESS WHY YOU MORON

IF I HAVE A WORK DUE FOR TOMORROW IT WILL TAKE PRIORITY OVER THE ONE FOR IN THREE WEEKS

AND WITH EVERYTHING YOU ARE GIVING US THERE IS ALWAYS A WORK DUE FOR TOMORROW

WE'LL GET TO THAT ONE WHEN ITS DUE FOR THE NEXT DAY BECAUSE THERES NO WAY WE CAN AFFORD THE TIME TO DO IT BEFORE

 

AND THEN WHEN IVE BEEN THROUGH MONTHS OF THIS AND IM A COMPLETE WRECK YOU COME ALL WORRIED AND YOURE LIKE "well what could we do to help" WELL IDK STOP BEING DUMB FOR ONCE THAT WOULD BE A GREAT START "ah no that won't be possible"

 

and look maybe i'm kinda biased on this because i've been burnt out for so long that i can't even remember what it's like to have a consistent work output

(that started before i came here but they certainly did their best to make it go worse all the time)

but at this point idk what to do

well i know

just tank it for some time

in 30 days i get my very last final ever

after that, a big project (yes another one) to do through january

(technically we're supposed to have been preparing it since september already but uuuh)

then some minimal administrative contacts to validate my internship and get my diploma

(though i wouldn't be surprised if even that turns into a nightmare, they're absolutely capable of this)

(at this point i just assume everything admin-related in here will turn into a mess both hilarious and excruciating)

(and i get pleasantly surprised when it works)

and after that i'm done

 

but i'm getting so tired

and i can't even get myself to work on the project for tomorrow

and then there will be the one after and another one and aother one and aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

 

i'm not sure how i'll be in 30 days tbh

but i'm getting really tired of needing 4 months of holidays for every 3 months of classes just to recover from it

 

... oh wow there's much less shouting than i expected

maybe i just don't have it in me to be so angry all the time

too tired

*hugs*

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

4 minutes ago, Just A Silvereye said:

*huuuuuuugs*

I understand

I'm not sure if I agree, but I understand

 

And I really really really hope for all of you that you can sort this out

 

 

 

 

...okay I need to vent

and shout

  Hide contents

I'm just so freaking tired of this school

they can't coordinate anything ever and can't pass any kind of useful info to anyone and just keep being so dumb every time

like, teachers can share a freaking teaching unit without being made aware of each other's existence

and this keeps coming back to bite us

and they all just keep giving us work and work and more work like they all had complete monopoly on our time

NO

I have only 24 hours a day and 7 days a week I can't do everything at once

Please stop

These days I have a massive project to return every other day

(not exaggerating, I had 2 finals last Saturday, a big project to return on Monday, another one on tomorrow Wednesday, another one on Friday, and another one due on Friday but which has been just moved to Sunday, and another final on Saturday)

Oh yeah, they also had this brilliant idea of Saturday classes, so we get even less time to work on all that and get even more tired

And today the teacher didn't understand why we didn't start working on his project that's due in 3 weeks

WELL GUESS WHY YOU MORON

IF I HAVE A WORK DUE FOR TOMORROW IT WILL TAKE PRIORITY OVER THE ONE FOR IN THREE WEEKS

AND WITH EVERYTHING YOU ARE GIVING US THERE IS ALWAYS A WORK DUE FOR TOMORROW

WE'LL GET TO THAT ONE WHEN ITS DUE FOR THE NEXT DAY BECAUSE THERES NO WAY WE CAN AFFORD THE TIME TO DO IT BEFORE

 

AND THEN WHEN IVE BEEN THROUGH MONTHS OF THIS AND IM A COMPLETE WRECK YOU COME ALL WORRIED AND YOURE LIKE "well what could we do to help" WELL IDK STOP BEING DUMB FOR ONCE THAT WOULD BE A GREAT START "ah no that won't be possible"

 

and look maybe i'm kinda biased on this because i've been burnt out for so long that i can't even remember what it's like to have a consistent work output

(that started before i came here but they certainly did their best to make it go worse all the time)

but at this point idk what to do

well i know

just tank it for some time

in 30 days i get my very last final ever

after that, a big project (yes another one) to do through january

(technically we're supposed to have been preparing it since september already but uuuh)

then some minimal administrative contacts to validate my internship and get my diploma

(though i wouldn't be surprised if even that turns into a nightmare, they're absolutely capable of this)

(at this point i just assume everything admin-related in here will turn into a mess both hilarious and excruciating)

(and i get pleasantly surprised when it works)

and after that i'm done

 

but i'm getting so tired

and i can't even get myself to work on the project for tomorrow

and then there will be the one after and another one and aother one and aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

 

i'm not sure how i'll be in 30 days tbh

but i'm getting really tired of needing 4 months of holidays for every 3 months of classes just to recover from it

 

... oh wow there's much less shouting than i expected

maybe i just don't have it in me to be so angry all the time

too tired

*hugs*

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

2 hours ago, Just A Silvereye said:

*huuuuuuugs*

I understand

I'm not sure if I agree, but I understand

 

And I really really really hope for all of you that you can sort this out

 

 

 

 

...okay I need to vent

and shout

  Hide contents

I'm just so freaking tired of this school

they can't coordinate anything ever and can't pass any kind of useful info to anyone and just keep being so dumb every time

like, teachers can share a freaking teaching unit without being made aware of each other's existence

and this keeps coming back to bite us

and they all just keep giving us work and work and more work like they all had complete monopoly on our time

NO

I have only 24 hours a day and 7 days a week I can't do everything at once

Please stop

These days I have a massive project to return every other day

(not exaggerating, I had 2 finals last Saturday, a big project to return on Monday, another one on tomorrow Wednesday, another one on Friday, and another one due on Friday but which has been just moved to Sunday, and another final on Saturday)

Oh yeah, they also had this brilliant idea of Saturday classes, so we get even less time to work on all that and get even more tired

And today the teacher didn't understand why we didn't start working on his project that's due in 3 weeks

WELL GUESS WHY YOU MORON

IF I HAVE A WORK DUE FOR TOMORROW IT WILL TAKE PRIORITY OVER THE ONE FOR IN THREE WEEKS

AND WITH EVERYTHING YOU ARE GIVING US THERE IS ALWAYS A WORK DUE FOR TOMORROW

WE'LL GET TO THAT ONE WHEN ITS DUE FOR THE NEXT DAY BECAUSE THERES NO WAY WE CAN AFFORD THE TIME TO DO IT BEFORE

 

AND THEN WHEN IVE BEEN THROUGH MONTHS OF THIS AND IM A COMPLETE WRECK YOU COME ALL WORRIED AND YOURE LIKE "well what could we do to help" WELL IDK STOP BEING DUMB FOR ONCE THAT WOULD BE A GREAT START "ah no that won't be possible"

 

and look maybe i'm kinda biased on this because i've been burnt out for so long that i can't even remember what it's like to have a consistent work output

(that started before i came here but they certainly did their best to make it go worse all the time)

but at this point idk what to do

well i know

just tank it for some time

in 30 days i get my very last final ever

after that, a big project (yes another one) to do through january

(technically we're supposed to have been preparing it since september already but uuuh)

then some minimal administrative contacts to validate my internship and get my diploma

(though i wouldn't be surprised if even that turns into a nightmare, they're absolutely capable of this)

(at this point i just assume everything admin-related in here will turn into a mess both hilarious and excruciating)

(and i get pleasantly surprised when it works)

and after that i'm done

 

but i'm getting so tired

and i can't even get myself to work on the project for tomorrow

and then there will be the one after and another one and aother one and aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

 

i'm not sure how i'll be in 30 days tbh

but i'm getting really tired of needing 4 months of holidays for every 3 months of classes just to recover from it

 

... oh wow there's much less shouting than i expected

maybe i just don't have it in me to be so angry all the time

too tired

*hugs* dumb teachers are dumb

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

guys

remember when i was getting kinda-bullied?

well i came up with a solution

stab them to death with friendship