Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[xinoehp512 he/him]

Granted.

Your bane is that your hands will never feel clean again.

I wish for a favorite number.

[Lunamor she/her]

Just now, xinoehp512 said:

Granted.

Your bane is that your hands will never feel clean again.

I wish for a favorite number.

*shudders*

Granted. It’s 309182747585920.20938474759703081, and you feel highly compelled to tell it to anyone and everyone you meet. 

I wish for a dollar.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

36 minutes ago, Cadmium Compounder said:

Granted. A cheezit falls from the sky directly in front of you at the rate of one cheezit every two minutes. Af first you believe that this is the bane, that you are only able to receive on cheezit every two minutes. However, by the end of the day, you find that you've had about 150 cheezits, and are satisfied. As you lay down to rest though, you get hit by a falling cheezit every two minutes. This keeps you awake for over an hour before you're finally able to ignore the falling and fall asleep. After a good night's rest, and 8 hours of sleep, you wake up to discover you've been covered in over 200 cheezits. 

Throughout the remainder of your 8 hour work day, and 8 hours of extra time, you are bombarded by almost 500 more cheezits. Your family and colleagues love you, and you begin to see how this can be good. You start collecting containers to hand out your extra cheezits, as you are not able to handle that many in a day, day after day. 

A week passes. Soon your family and friends lose interest, only coming periodically for more cheezits. You've found that you've run out of tupperware and other containers for your cheezits. After a month, no one is interested in your cheezits any more, and your skin has begun to turn orange. You realize that this orange tint is not good, and determine that you need to cut down on your cheezit diet. Unfortunately, every 2 minutes, another cheezit falls from the sky, tempting you, luring you to just eat one more. 

One year later, you find that your diet consists of cheezits with every meal, your skin has turned full orange, and you've gained over 50 pounds in a year. Yet the cheezits continue falling. Once. Every. Two. Minutes.  Crunchy. Delicious. Demonic. Cheezits. 

Crunch

I have no regrets.

 

4 minutes ago, xinoehp512 said:

Granted.

Your bane is that your hands will never feel clean again.

I wish for a favorite number.

Granted, but it’s 2047392937382982737382929294947483902033738392920938373838392036367465181993873729937382937747010^3627747382836647383828737473893939939393838383883, and since that’s takes so impossibly long to say, you just forget about it. 

Edit: GOSH DARNIT LUNA YOU’VE NINJAD ME YET AGAIN AHHHHHHHHHHHH

You get your dollar, but you’re cursed to be ninja’d forever more.

I wish for wings sprouting out of my back that allow me to fly within the laws of physics

Edited September 24, 2019 by Truthless of Shinovar

[xinoehp512 he/him]

Just now, Truthless of Shinovar said:

I have no regrets.

 

Granted, but it’s 2047392937382982737382929294947483902033738392920938373838392036367465181993873729937382937747010^3627747382836647383828737473893939939393838383883, and since that’s takes so impossibly long to say, you just forget about it. 

I wish for wings

Edit: GOSH DARNIT LUNA YOU’VE NINJAD ME YET AGAIN AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Granted. You are now a handerfle.

1 minute ago, Lunamor said:

*shudders*

Granted. It’s 309182747585920.20938474759703081, and you feel highly compelled to tell it to anyone and everyone you meet. 

I wish for a dollar.

Granted.

Your bane is that you can no longer see the color blue

I wish for a photographic memory.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

3 minutes ago, xinoehp512 said:

Granted. You are now a handerfle.

Granted.

Your bane is that you can no longer see the color blue

I wish for a photographic memory.

Granted, your brain literallly turns into a camera. On the bright side, it’s a really nice camera!

I wish for some waffles

[Lunamor she/her]

8 minutes ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Edit: GOSH DARNIT LUNA YOU’VE NINJAD ME YET AGAIN AHHHHHHHHHHHH

Mwahahahahaha

[xinoehp512 he/him]

4 minutes ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Granted, your brain literallly turns into a camera. On the bright side, it’s a really nice camera!

I wish for some waffles

Granted.

You no longer have a sense of humor.

I wish I could create art.

[+Doomstick he/him]

13 minutes ago, xinoehp512 said:

Granted.

You no longer have a sense of humor.

I wish I could create art.

The nightwatcher gives up

[CadCom he/him]

1 hour ago, xinoehp512 said:

Granted.

You no longer have a sense of humor.

I wish I could create art.

Granted. You are now paint.

I wish for omniscience 

[overlord stick]

Granted. Thanks to your infinite knowledge, you realize life is an illusion, and you live in a computer simulation.

[Mushroom Catalog he/him]

The computer simulation becomes sentient and asks the nightwatcher to make it unsentient so it doesn't have to sit here and run humans and furrets in circles for all eternity.

[Brightness Warrior she/her]

I wish that I had some clones to do my homework faster.

Edited September 25, 2019 by Brightness Warrior

[+Doomstick he/him]

2 minutes ago, Brightness Warrior said:

Granted! You are immediately shunned by society as a human-avian hybrid and the government has you captured for study. Enjoy life!

I wish that I had some clones to do my homework faster.

granted, but the equation to find out how many times as much homework you get is 2^x

i wish for something random

[overlord stick]

Granted, you get disemboweled heads. Your bane, is that they're not cooked.

[Lunamor she/her]

7 minutes ago, Lord Furret said:

Granted, you get disemboweled heads. Your bane, is that they're not cooked.

WHAT THE HECK PER

Also you gonna wish? 

[AonEne he/him]

1 hour ago, Lunamor said:

WHAT THE HECK PER

I think we’ve learned that Per is a cannibal. A gentleman, though. He cooks his food, thank you very much. 

[Lunamor she/her]

1 hour ago, AonEne said:

I think we’ve learned that Per is a cannibal. A gentleman, though. He cooks his food, thank you very much. 

Unless “donating” it to others, apparently.

[overlord stick]

11 hours ago, AonEne said:

I think we’ve learned that Per is a cannibal. A gentleman, though. He cooks his food, thank you very much. 

Well of course, raw heads are just gross 

12 hours ago, Lunamor said:

WHAT THE HECK PER

Also you gonna wish? 

Oh yeah, I wish for cooked eyeballs.

 

[CadCom he/him]

3 hours ago, Lord Furret said:

Well of course, raw heads are just gross 

Oh yeah, I wish for cooked eyeballs.

 

Granted. You are handed a platter, with your own eyeballs, which have been steamed, then roasted. Too bad you're blind now. 

I wish for neither a boon or a bane. 

[+Ed Venture]

Granted. But also not granted. But then granted. But then un-granted. But then granted... This continues for some time until Cultivation appears to break the loop. Then they both disappear. Therefore, you get nothing. Also, now you’re lost in the crazy forest with no way out.

I wish for the sole ownership of Antarctica.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

33 minutes ago, Butt Ad Venture said:

Granted. But also not granted. But then granted. But then un-granted. But then granted... This continues for some time until Cultivation appears to break the loop. Then they both disappear. Therefore, you get nothing. Also, now you’re lost in the crazy forest with no way out.

I wish for the sole ownership of Antarctica.

Granted, but the penguins rebel and deploy their infamous Penguin Armada to dispose of you promptly.

I wish for some more spell slots

[Rosharan A.C. he/him]

3 hours ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Granted, but the penguins rebel and deploy their infamous Penguin Armada to dispose of you promptly.

I wish for some more spell slots

Granted. Due to the fact that the nightwatcher didn't get this reference, you are given a four-cubbied shelf, with one spell book for each shelf. And your bane is that you're now lactose intolerant.

 

I wish that I could unlock dry bones in Mario Cart World Tour.

[+Doomstick he/him]

5 hours ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Granted, but the penguins rebel and deploy their infamous Penguin Armada to dispose of you promptly.

I wish for some more spell slots

Granted, you have 8hours of free time, you are now level 1

i wish to roll on the wild magic table

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

54 minutes ago, The Last Post said:

Granted, you have 8hours of free time, you are now level 1

i wish to roll on the wild magic table

Granted, but there’s a gelatinous cube you’re not aware of that surrounds the table. 

I wish for some donuts

[+Doomstick he/him]

12 minutes ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Granted, but there’s a gelatinous cube you’re not aware of that surrounds the table. 

I wish for some donuts

 Got a fifty, not on a table!