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Posted

Granted, but 99% percent if the money you earn is a form of Ancient currency, that is worth nothing and is useless today.  

I wish to have to have the same abilities as The Nightwatcher.

Posted

Granted, but using them even once will shatter your soul into a billion fragments, utterly annihilating your consciousness. (Attempting to use your Nightwatcher abilities to alter your own bane will cause the universe to implode, so don't get any funny ideas.)

 

I wish for the ability to alter people's emotional states.

Posted (edited)

Granted. A rock TV falls on your foot. Like a giant rock carved to look like a TV.

I wish to not be blind.

Edited by Windreader
Posted

Granted. A rock TV falls on your foot. Like a giant rock carved to look like a TV.

I wish to not be blind.

Granted. You become totally sober, and can never become intoxicated again.

 

I want the skills and motivation to become one of the Mars One colonists.

Posted

I'm gonna to break protocol and deny that one. If you went to mars, we'd miss you here. If you absolutely want it, you can have it, but all the other colonists die, leaving you alone until you die.

On an unrelated note, one of my friends is a finalist for the mars one program... not sure how I feel about that...

Posted

I'm gonna to break protocol and deny that one. If you went to mars, we'd miss you here. If you absolutely want it, you can have it, but all the other colonists die, leaving you alone until you die.

On an unrelated note, one of my friends is a finalist for the mars one program... not sure how I feel about that...

Aw, that's sweet. To be fair, there'll eventually be internet access. It'd be like that time I stopped coming here for a while, only when I come back I'm on MARS! As for your friend... wow, I'm so jealous! Wish her or him the best for me.

 

I'll see if they're taking applicants again once I've finished my PhD.

 

Anyway, back to watching the Night ;)

Posted

Won't Mars internet have, like, massive lag?

WHAT KID OF BANE IS THAT?!?! I mean, I can understand getting sunburn from how bright it is, or going blind, or going colorblind, or SOMETHING related to a TV, but THAT?! I mean, seriously!

Anyways, Granted. Every day, it tears out your kidneys, which will then regenerate in 12 hours, only to be plucked out again.

I think it's just some reference to Prometheus or whatever his name is. Could've sworn it was a thing.

Posted

Granted, although you do not get any snacks or drinks, and you do not get a nice place to sit.

 

I wish that daylight savings time was no more!

Posted

Granted. You are home sick, and no-one tells you until after he's gone.

 

I wish Brandon Sanderson would visit Christchurch, New Zealand and I could attend.

 

Granted. The entire south island of New Zealand is torn apart by earthquakes and volcanic eruptions. Like Atlantis of old, it sinks to the depths of the ocean with you, Brandon Sanderson, and the rest of south New Zealand's population.

 

I wish for a copy of the Necronomicon.

Posted

Granted. The entire south island of New Zealand is torn apart by earthquakes and volcanic eruptions. Like Atlantis of old, it sinks to the depths of the ocean with you, Brandon Sanderson, and the rest of south New Zealand's population.

 

I wish for a copy of the Necronomicon.

Granted. You're driven mad by the revelation. Also, please watch this instructional video, if you haven't already.

 

I wish to retrieve Brandon Sanderson from the sunken ruins of New Zealand.

Posted

Granted. You become totally sober, and can never become intoxicated again.

 

I want the skills and motivation to become one of the Mars One colonists.

That's not much of a curse for someone under 21.

Anyway, granted. You take Brandon's place.

Posted

That's not much of a curse for someone under 21.

Anyway, granted. You take Brandon's place.

Storms, man. You're supposed to ask for something!

You can sink with New Zealand too.

Posted

Storms, man. You're supposed to ask for something!

You can sink with New Zealand too.

Well, you didn't wish either... So do I get the curse or you?

I wish everyone would convert to Zucchini-ism, including Brandon . Join the Zucchini-born!

Granted. Only real zucchinis join.

I wish to not be blind. Or sunken with New Zealand.

Posted

You now reside in a prison in the center of the sun. You are shielded by a powerful magic, but if you were to open your eyes, you would be blinded. There is no escaping. You are out of wishes.

I wish for the ability to create art. I always wanted to be able to sculpt or draw or paint or all of them.

Posted

Granted. You compulsively destroy it after you make it. If someone else has it, you track it down and then destroy it.

I wish to not reside in the center of the sun.

Posted

I wish for the ability to create art. I always wanted to be able to sculpt or draw or paint or all of them.

Granted

Your art is so beautiful and majestic that anyone who sees it melts. You are put under arrest, and spend the rest of your life in prison. Finally you draw one last illustration, killing your gaurds as your mind snaps. Uou conquer the known world, until no one contests you. You end up never being able to satisfy your broken mind, and lock yourself away until you rot and turn to dust.

I wish I had the Shard of Pizzas. ( totally real )

Posted

Granted... but no one has ANYTHING to talk about.

 

I wish for another series to read since I'm done with all Cosmere novels and the WoT.

Posted (edited)

Granted. Try the Kingkiller Chronicles. You can never read another Cosmere book.

I wish to not reside in the sun's corona.

Edited by Windreader
Posted

Granted. Unfortunately, you have to get an enema.

I wish for Kobold to post here.

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