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Posted

Granted. You are now afraid of your shadow and are constantly running to avoid it.

I wish for a girlfriend!!! Preferably Female if it's not too much to ask.

Posted (edited)

Granted. For a curse, you Must eat your least favorite food.(not all curses have to be awful)

I wish to still have my super laser and lifeless squirrel armies when I go back in time and I also want a pizza.

Edited by jasonpenguin
Posted

Granted. Your lifeless squirrel armies eat you pizza and get a food poisoning. It drives them so crazy that they use your laser to burn your head off, so they can eat your brain fried (zombie squirrels? ; P).

 

I wish to remember every word I read, so I can get A's on every test, and listen to my favourite novels in my mind.

Posted

Granted. For a curse, you Must eat your least favorite food.(not all curses have to be awful)

 

You, sir, clearly don't know what my least favorite food is...

 

@Pestis

 

Granted.  You get an 'A' on the SAT, but nobody takes the score because it's not on the 2400-point scale.

 

I wish I had a fancy hat to wear.

Posted

@Pestis

 

Granted.  You get an 'A' on the SAT, but nobody takes the score because it's not on the 2400-point scale.

Well, that's fine with me, as SAT is kind of useless in Europe. : D

 

Granted. But your fancy hat is magical, and when you wear it you turn into a rhino. Rhino in a fancy hat.

 

I wish for my rats to turn into cats, but only for me to see it, so that my landlord (who doesn't like cats) still thinks they're rats, and allows me to keep them.

Posted

Well, that's fine with me, as SAT is kind of useless in Europe. : D

Granted. But your fancy hat is magical, and when you wear it you turn into a rhino. Rhino in a fancy hat.

Giraffe, actually.

Posted

I wish for my rats to turn into cats, but only for me to see it, so that my landlord (who doesn't like cats) still thinks they're rats, and allows me to keep them.

 

Granted. The rats do not survive their transformation, and your landlord thinks you are a psychopath who collects dead rats.

 

I wish for a high-quality Steelheart movie to be produced.

Posted (edited)

Granted. You have 'Mary had a little lamb' stuck in your head until you die.(including when you watch the movie)

I wish for my previous curse to be undone.

Edited by jasonpenguin
Posted (edited)

Giraffe, actually.

 

Haha, nice one! But I actually think that her "apology to rhinos" is really insulting to actual giraffes. 

 

 

Granted. You have 'Mary had a little lamb' stuck in your head until you die.(including when you watch the movie)

I wish for my previous curse to be undone.

Granted. Your curse is undone for exactly 10 seconds.
 
I wish my rats killed by the previos curse to be alive again.
 
 
Edited by Pestis the Spider
Posted

Granted, but they are all vegetables, interpret that however you want.

 

I wish for a 5 day weekend (Not forever, just this week).

Posted

Granted. You will develop a complete and debilitating fear of all light sources, which will drive you to live your life in pitch darkness. You will take up residence in a deep subterranean cavern, eating strange fungi and luminescent cave fish for sustenance. Over the years, your skin and hair will be bleached white as snow from your environment; your eyes will atrophy into nothingness, and your hands and feet will develop strange suckers allowing you to scale cave walls like a gecko. On the bright side, your senses of smell, taste, and hearing will be almost exponentially increased.

 

I wish for a box of chocolates.

Posted

Granted.  It explodes when you open it.

 

I wish that Fallout 4 would be released already.  For that matter, Elder Scrolls 6 as well.  And that Elder Scrolls Online didn't exist.

Posted

Granted.  You aren't afraid of light because you can't see it.  You're blind.

 

I wish I was back in the present day.  Ancient Egypt is getting a bit boring.

Posted (edited)

Granted. Your actions in Ancient Egypt have caused the world as we know it to be radically altered. Conspiracy theories regarding a modern human in Ancient Egypt have run rampant, kindling a new cultlike fascination with their culture. Upon arrival, you are immediately recognized by fanatics and sacrificed to Ra atop the pyramid that was once your home.

I wish my iPad had 32 gigabytes rather than the measly 16 I am stuck with.

 

How?

 

Anyways Granted.  Your ipad has 32 gigs... of cache.  Because of this stone-headed design flaw, there wasn't enough room on the CPU die to put, well, pretty much anything else.  Your ipad is now the slowest computer in the world.

 

I wish that I had been given money or cars or something, rather than being executed.

Edited by Patrick Star
Posted

How?

Anyways Granted. Your ipad has 32 gigs... of cache. Because of this stone-headed design flaw, there wasn't enough room on the CPU die to put, well, pretty much anything else. Your ipad is now the slowest computer in the world.

I wish that I had been given money or cars or something, rather than being executed.

Granted. You now live on the moon.

I wish... my friend would have less trouble holding onto his money?

Posted

@natc

 

Do I at least get a futuristic moon base?

 

@Chouta

 

Granted.  However, you can't share them because they're so spoilery, and when you do, people hate you for revealing all of the plot twists.

 

I wish that I had a better TV.

Posted

I wish that I had a better TV.

 

Granted. Vultures spontaneously appear and tear out your kidneys every time you turn it on. Your kidneys will regenerate, only to be continuously plucked out again with jagged vulture beaks for as long as you have the television on.

 

I wish for a phoenix as a pet.

Posted

Granted. Vultures spontaneously appear and tear out your kidneys every time you turn it on. Your kidneys will regenerate, only to be continuously plucked out again with jagged vulture beaks for as long as you have the television on.

 

I wish for a phoenix as a pet.

 

WHAT KID OF BANE IS THAT?!?!  I mean, I can understand getting sunburn from how bright it is, or going blind, or going colorblind, or SOMETHING related to a TV, but THAT?!  I mean, seriously!

 

Anyways, Granted.  Every day, it tears out your kidneys, which will then regenerate in 12 hours, only to be plucked out again.

Posted

Granted.  You think yourself fabulous, but to everyone else you're seen as self-centered and not seen as fabulous at all.  

I wish for every wish ever granted in this forum!

Posted (edited)

The nightwatcher is old. Her hearing isn't what it once was. She misheard 'boon' as 'bane' and instead gave you every curse. But as a curse.to balance it out she gives you invincibility.

Ninja'd

Granted. It is physicAlly larger, but worth the same. And for a curse you have to eat a bug.

I wish that my curse of having my laser and squirrel armies go awry went away forever.

Edited by jasonpenguin
Posted

The nightwatcher is old. Her hearing isn't what it once was. She misheard 'boon' as 'bane' and instead gave you every curse. But as a curse.to balance it out she gives you invincibility.

Ninja'd

Granted. It is physicAlly larger, but worth the same. And for a curse you have to eat a bug.

I wish that my curse of having my laser and squirrel armies go awry went away forever.

Granted. You are now free of the laser and squirrel armies. The IRS show up at your door, glaring hard at you. The only way you can get them to leave is by baking them 6 dozen fat-free, gluten free, sugar-free, delicious cookies. If you give them ones they don't like, they won't leave.

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