Through the Living Hopper

Riddikulus!

Professor Lupin

Ehem. Where am I?

I'm a 6th year

This is the longest section so far, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. I'll be interested to hear your feedback. Also, if it refers to the Students as "we" anywhere, point it out to me. I tried to find all of them, but some might have slipped through. @Through The Living Coder@Through The Living Grass@Rynturning_Light@Through The Living Ash@Through The Living Star

I'll join as Jarry Motter, a high-achieving, even higher-dueling 6th year.

I don't think that it's that bad, but you should read PHM and see what you think. Edit: Aurora Rising Fun, I guess Review: okay, as long as the reader doesn't like Halo.

The Scorpion King (2002)

I agree with Schizoposting, 1st person needs to have a reason. Almost always I'll like 3rd person more, because I think it has better prose almost always. But PHM was first person, and I think that was the best way it could have been written, so I don't really know.

Yeah, I am. I dislike the Hunter Games writing. I think it was a good idea that was pretty much ruined.

Finished: Tailored Realities Excellent. Project Hail Mary What. Did. I. Just. Read. I'm actually excited for the movie. Let's see how it turns out! Review: worth a read, no matter what you like. Fun story, interesting science, and actually low swearing. Highly recommend! The Testing - Book Club Hunger Games rip-off, same awful writing, but I actually liked more than the Hunger Games, weirdly. Review: pretty good. Like I said, better than the Hunger Games. Worth a read, especially if you liked the Hunger Games or you like dystopian.

See, that's one of my problems. They get names at the end of the next section, but I don't want it to feel like a cheap reveal that they're not Òhrreri. I just can't figure out how to do that, because it does seem like Òhrreri is the man in the ditch.

I decided to do this earlier, because I am bored. THIS IS THE LAST OF THE FINISHED SECTIONS, SO YOU WILL HAVE TO WAIT FOR NUMBER 4. Feedback is still okay on the earlier sections. I like a lot of the future narrative in this section, but the past is still really clunky. Any suggestions on how to fix this would be appreciated. Again, I want honest feedback about what isn't working, and (hopefully) what is.

You have the prize for the best welcome thread title. Welcome to the Shard! You've arrived at the best place on the Internet, filled with the best people, the best desserts, and the best murderous animals! Here are a couple of tips to help you settle in to your new place as a cog in the Grand Apparatus that is the Shard: 1. Join S(anderson) E(limination). 2. Familiarize yourself with the most important forums: SE, Cosmere Q&A, and SE. 3. Tell us which books you have and haven't read (this helps us avoid spoilers) 4. HAVE FUN! Make friends! 5.

I code a little bit. I'm trying to figure it out without showing that I know nothing about this, though. I'll join the discussion for the next one.

That's fine. I just added the mentions because I forgot to last night. I'm glad you liked it! Òhrreri is not the man in the ditch, which I do need to make clearer. I'm not sure how, though. After all, they don't have names yet (which is one of the biggest narrative hurdles in the next few sections).

We're still working through what I've already written, so this one comes early. I need the perspective shift here, but I don't know if it's confusing. Also, post here or the sign-up thread if you want me to send my writing to you. @Through The Living Coder@Rynturning_Light@Through The Living Ash@Through The Living Grass@Through the Living Ink

Valor ran. He was weakened, but not much. Enough to flee. The power hated him, though his explanation had shown it something. He knew that Virtuosity was dangerous. He would like low on a planet, regain his power, then join the others. He was soon able to find a suitable system. The humans there were resilient! Some had been underground when the energy hit. Their planet was destroyed, but they still had life. Well, little beings, no matter. For I will make you anew. And thus was it born.

Division and Gravitation. I put Division, but it is a tough question. Now that I think about it, I'd probably change to Gravitation. But Skybreaker is great either way.

Òhrreri - Oh–rare–ee (I often use a throat sound on the i, but that's not necessary ÆreÏn - Ah–ray–een ÆreÏnã - Ah–ray–eenyā Buckle up.

The Breaking Talent

Give feedback here! Be honest! However, the main point of this is for me to basically spit out crap so that I have something on the page, so don't expect the same wonderful writing you get from every one of my posts. Shoot me a PM or post in the thread if you want me to send it to you! Have fun!

The basic plot is that a civilization is about to be destroyed because of its corruption, so one of the people is writing what is essentially a memoir, to warn people not to make the same mistakes that they did. Great! I'll send the prologue! I'll open up a new topic to discuss.