Archer

*gasp* I thought he was just really into Mitsubishi... Yes, I knew.

It is with great sadness that I make this announcement. Remember TFA? That guy from the LA? *dramtic pause* Turns out he was a traitor. *audience gasps* Shocking, I know. I've heard from a credible source that he is not the cookie-loving LA baker that we all thought he was, and is in fact the leader of the Ghostbloods! I have no choice but to add him to the traitor list. TUBA will exact vengeance on him and that tricksy guild of his. Eventually. Once we get those nukes online. (So we can email them to him.) Until then, nobody touch his baking, I think I saw one of his cookies moving. And you thought I'd forgotten. Mwa ha ha.

At the moment, Klasten is poorly armed, mourning the loss of his horse, and his only special power is spotting tropes and clichés. I'm pretty sure even a Tineye could beat him in a fight. But I'm sure he could teach you some... rope tricks? Campfire songs? Maybe some defensive horse riding techniques? If you're looking to get combat training, whatever the Craftsmen are offering is probably more useful. But if you want, we can do a training montage sometime. Klasten poofed into existence, having teleported from the Canton. "I can smell a developing quest a mile away," he announced. "It seemed prudent to pop by to make sure no wizards try to interfere. I can't stand wizards." He pulled a wollaping stick from his bag and looked around for wizards.

Here's the thread to chat about Alleyverse stuff in. Enjoy! (Outdated) OP: If you have any questions, please feel free to ask them here!

Who, me? I'd be a terrible target. Never been involved in politics in my life. No sir. Not me. *realizes TFA still has the link to election in his sig* On a totally unrelated note, I'll be hiding in my concrete bunker for the next few decades. For, um, tax purposes.

Yeah, that's why the Political Assassinations Division of the Ghostbloods hasn't been very active lately. They suffer from a severe lack of potential targets.

*follows the thread, but appreciates your thinking of me* Just be aware that in practice, killing people's characters tends to be harder than that. It's the nature of the RP. Go ahead and blast all the NPC's you want to though. And I'm sorry, but this character is OP for Era 2. The stormlight thing is fine (in practice, other people carry an endless supply of it, which has the same effect as what you've proposed). We use the Nightwatcher-helped-me-break-the-rules excuse a lot, so it's okay. I would like to see it better explained though. And the time travel thing could cause issues. Time travel is a dangerous element to introduce to an RP (yes, I know we've used it before, but that had little impact). Especially as it's non-cannon, so it has very few restrictions. The impression I got was that Anna can use her powers relatively easily, which gives her way too much power. As cool as this character is, it pushes the limit of plausibility too much, and is significantly more powerful than other characters, so I'd like to see it reworked. Welcome to the Alleyverse, by the way. I look forward to RPing with you in the future.

My headcanon was that they work using magnets. No one really knows how magnets work. They tap into that magical ambiguity. Either that or they use a version of an FTL communication network to signal an information-center with a database of locations that sends back the appropriate distance and direction, allowing the onboard micro-stylus to draw the appropriate modifier to complete the aon. Only if they caught.

^ WHY WOULD YOU EVEN THINK TO ASK THAT? Klasten (the real one) watched her cook. He picked up a bottle of hot sauce and absentmindedly poured it on half the tacos. He liked food with a kick. "Why did we choose the hardest building to break into? You're a Ghostblood, you could have easily waltzed into their vault and found their stone. I could have found the TUBA one with ease, but no, we had to pick the Canton." He stared out the window. "If we hit those to spots next, it should be easy. No resistance, just a simple in and out. We could have three rocks by sundown. Could. But at what cost?" He raised the bottle to make a toast. "Here's to Kicker, a no-good, rotten traitor, terrible dancer, awful singer, and my best friend. Rest in peace." He grabbed a half-cooked taco from the pan. "I can't tell if my heart is in this or not. I'm not even sure if we're going about this the right way. I need to take some time to think." Klasten raised the bottle to his lips, then in one fluid motion, chugged it down. He needed an excuse to cry.

Well, that was unexpected. I'm okay with it, but I'd like you to stick a link to that post in your sig so people can find/reference it easily. You've covered all the bases that could case trouble. If people abuse this, we can do a polite intervention. In practice, this could be really useful. One can write lengthy dialogues with an important character without having to split it into multiple posts. It's an intriguing prospect. I look forward to seeing how it plays out.

You know you're a sanderfan when you you notice an Aon Aeo disguised as some wall art.

And so, Tarsaan died. His last thought was OH-EE-OH-EE-OH-EE-AW-EE-AW! Klasten looked on. When he was convinced that his double was no longer a threat, he called out to the Blood Angels. "You can cease fire! We got him." "He is definitely deceased. Tena's pulled out all his spikes." "And now's she's counting them to make sure she got all of them. Good work Tena." "Well done everyone. Now, let's all agree to not tell Kestraal what happened, and hope he doesn't notice the damage."

Nights! The world needs to hear my banter! thought Tarsaan. He groped around on the ground to find his head. He couldn't, but he did find Kicker's body, so he decided to make do. He tore Kicker's head off, and affixed it where his head used to be. Huh. So that's why we don't mix skeletons, he thought to himself as nothing useful happened. Time to enact my special defensive maneuver: the Harlem Shake! The kandra began to shake, moving erratically. His movements caused Tena to miss his chest, hitting him in the leg instead. It cleaved it right off. I can work with this, he thought. Fortunately, the leg wasn't the one he kept his brain in. In an incredible display of acrobatics, he kicked his leg into the middle of the hallway. Guesting towards it with the universal hand sign for save the rock from being destroyed by the barrage of gunfire, or catch me? Which will it be, hero? he indicated that Tena should choose between two options, thus revealing her true character. Without waiting to see what she chose, he started hopping away. Klasten, who was still very confused, stuck out his leg and tripped him. He then started beating the kandra mercilessly with his broom.

Tarsaan had a really witty response prepared. He just couldn't say it because he was headless. So instead, he stood up and raised his fists defensively. Then Klasten hit him in the back with a silver catapult wheel. "I love Tia cards!" he said happily. "Sorry for the delay, I had to go off-world to hide a bag of... nevermind what. Where's the-" He cut off as Tarsaan kicked him in the gut. Tarsaan then grabbed his throat and began to squeeze. If he could talk, he would have made demands that Tena surrender, but he couldn't, so he just held Klasten between the two of them to block any oncoming attacks.

Klasten worked diligently. There was no clear pattern to what he stole. Some things he put in the bag, others he didn't. Pile of gold coins? Yup. Harsmway? Nope. Silver-plated catapult? Wouldn't fit, but he did take the wheels. Eventually, he'd pillaged all the shiny things he could find. The vault was now noticeably more empty. "That should be enough," he said to himself. Lithely, he climbed up the tree and out of the vault. Pulling a Tia card from his pocket, he teleported away. Meanwhile, Tarsaan was having a worse day than Tena. The walls continued to explode around him, blowing chunks of plaster everywhere. And there was the small matter of the ax in his chest. Fortunately, he kept all of his valuable organs in his leg. With great effort, he regrew an eye so he could glare at Tena. Then he hugged her. It was more of a death-grip attempting to squeeze the life out of her, but it looked a bit like a hug.

Tena's foot connected with Tarsaan's chin. His head snapped back with an unpleasant noise reminiscent of a whip. It hit the ground, still attached to his neck by a few threads of sinew. In response, Tarsaan grabbed Kicker's body and hurled it at Tena (which was quite impressive, given Kicker's weight). Meanwhile, Klasten got bored and decided to go exploring. He found a stairwell and took it to the floor above them. There, he discovered the hole Tena's tree had made. Curious, he slid down the tree and into the vault. "YOOOO HOOOO! ANYBODY HOME?" he called. No one answered. "Can I take all your valuables?" Klasten whispered. "Say nothing if the answer is yes." No one replied, not even the shades, for they'd been slain by Tena. "Awesome!" Klasten looked around, and found Tarsaan's bag lying on the floor near the old entrance. "Oooh. Nice use of Expander's Glass," he noted. He then proceeded to shovel all the gold coins, shiny objects, and colourful rocks he could find in the vault into the bag.

Tena's voice was lost in the din of the artillery fire. From Klasten's position next to one of the soldiers, he caught glimpses of her in the muzzle flashes. He quickly lost track of her though, as the total darkness made it difficult to see. "SLAY THEM ALL!" Klasten commanded, waving his broom like a sword, relishing the taste of battle. Meanwhile, Tarsaan was thrown from his saddle when Kicker collapsed from the Shardax and gunshot wounds. As he fell, he snatched the aluminum rifle from Kicker's saddlebags. Using the horse's body as cover, he fired a few shots back down the hall. His head was blasted off as he did so, but he quickly regrew it. "You knaves! You shall pay for this insult!" he called to his attackers. It was unclear if anyone heard him in all the confusion.

As soon as the first sparks from the welder began to fly, the Shades took notice. One of the Simple Rules had been violated. Instantly, their eyes burst alight, blazing red. Moving with unnatural speed, they charged towards Tena. When Tena offered him her hand, Klasten leveled his crossbow at her and fired it. The bolt released with a twang, flying directly towards her heart. Kicker, recognizing Klasten’s signal, lashed out at Tena as well. His teeth ripped off a large chuck of her pants, including the pocket where she had placed the rock. Prize in mouth, Kicker jumped back over the silver barrier and ran out of the room. Klasten wasn’t far behind him. He’d thrown aside his crossbow and had drawn his aluminum handgun from a hidden holster in his thigh. He dashed out the door, firing blindly behind him as he went to discourage anyone from following him. As soon as he’d exited, the horse kicked the vault door shut. Klasten skidded to a halt. “CLEAR!” he shouted. As he did, he threw his gun at the switch he’d affixed to the side wall. It flicked it, activating the trap he’d been preparing earlier. Simultaneously, the three explosives he’d placed on the roof, and the two on either side of the vault door, exploded. A shower of dust and bricks and rock rained down from every direction. In seconds, the room was filled with rubble from the collapsed roof. Klasten couldn’t even see the vault door for it was buried under tonnes of debris. As he and Kicker stood in the hallway, a stray brick clipped Klasten in the side of the head. It peeled off a swathe of skin, and crushed his eye. Klasten just smiled. As he stood there, watching in triumph, his face began to grow back. In moments, it had completely healed. “Kicker, good sir, I am indebted. You shall be rewarded for your actions,” Klasten said appreciatively. Kicker spit the rock out, and Klasten picked it up. Then his leg opened up, revealing an aluminum compartment. He placed it there, then resealed himself. “Undoubtedly the lass is now realizing that she has been duped. By me, Tarsaan, the world’s greatest kandra!” He tore his eyes away from the destruction he had wrought. “Strangely, I have no interest in remaining here to ensure my foe has been fully dispatched. I am confident that my elaborate scheme has worked perfectly. Come Kicker, let us go celebrate our victory!” ******* Klasten had spent an entire day looking for the vault, but he had yet to find it. Suddenly, an intense pain flared in his head. A strong feeling, indicating something cliché was happening. Breaking into a run, he travelled through the twisting hallways of the Canton, following the feeling to its source. After a minute, he opened a door and ran straight into... himself. Well, Tarsaan, who looked exactly like him. “Who the- what the- Kicker, what’s going on?” he babbled. “Time to go!” Tarsaan announced, backhanding Klasten to the ground. He jumped on Kicker (who looked a little guilty but went along with it). “Away! Away!” he shouted and rode down the hall. Rubbing his face as he sat on the ground, Klasten was stunned. “I have no idea what’s going on,” he said. While Klasten wandered about the Canton, hopelessly lost, Tarsaan prepared his trap. He wanted the rock, and he knew that one of Klasten’s friends was likely to come to assist him. So, he planted some explosives: then went along with Tena, allowing her to do all the hard work to acquire the prize, all the while planning to stab her in the back in the end. He was hoping she’d just give it to him, but his backup plan worked just as well. Now he’s got what he came for, and intends to flee the area so he study the rock and its powers in his secret underground lair. Typical evil villainy behavior.

"Oh," Klasten said. "Okay." He backed away like a dejected puppy. His lips softened into a pout. Kicker glared at Tena as if to say, What the Hoid, girl!? See what you did to him? "Let's get this over with then," Klasten said, a hint of sadness creeping into his voice. He reached into his bag and pulled out a ten-foot silver beam. When Tena looked surprised by this feat, he mumbled something about glass purses. He also pulled out an acetylene torch and a welding mask. "Here," he said, passing her the tools. He had no trouble trusting others to hold his things. "I'm going to hold this end of the pole in place." He demonstrated by shoving one one end of the pole into the wall, then swinging the other end so it pressed into the other wall at a bit of an angle, then maintaining pressure on it so it stayed in place. It created a barrier at waist-height. "Just spot weld that end into place to stop it from moving. It should be easy enough to hop over - Kicker, if you wouldn't mind demonstrating!" Kicker leaped over the barrier and landed next to Tena. He nudged her with his snout to indicate she should applaud. "However," Klasten continued, "those Shades shouldn't be able to get past. I'd hate to be the guy who unleashed a hoard of angry ghosts on the Canton." He gestured at the girl with his crossbow. "Once you finish that, we can deal with her. I'd like to know if she can tell us how to use that rock. Surely it has magic powers."

Welcome @Tglassy! Would you mind saying 'something' for me? I'm just kidding. What's our favourite audiobook to listen to? Any good narrators you like?

"Good idea," Klasten said. "Give me the rock. I'll hold onto it. You're the better fighter, if that girl comes at us you don't want to be holding a heavy dead-weight." He held out his hand for Tena to pass him the rock. His tapped his foot furiously. Meanwhile, Kicker got bored of standing around, so he decided to practice his tap dancing. Clip, clop, clip, clop, tapped the horse's hooves, echoing in the large chamber.

Klasten winked at Kicker and slipped him a sugar cube. He was used to working with horses. Well, this horse anyway. "C'mon boy. Come over here, out of the way." He Kicker back towards the entrance. As the two of them stood in the doorway, he petted Kicker's mane.

Klasten let his mind wander. Are there bugs in here? That itch just won't go away. I should have checked with a local to see if the insects are poisonous around here. I wonder what Mace would be doing right now? Probably saving the world or something. He was always so altruistic. That’s what made him a good mentor. That and he had a killer right hook. I need to practice punching. I haven’t done much of that recently. The calluses on my knuckles have faded. When I get back to the Waystop I’ll spar with Kicker. Where is Kicker? I haven’t seen him since that cosmerenaut shot him. I hope he’s okay. Can balance a spoon on my nose? That seems like something I should be able to do. Maybe I learned how to do it during my childhood. I really wish I remembered my childhood. Do I have soup? Yes, the can’s in my pocket. Or is it? Klasten checked his pocket. Apparently I’ve lost my soup. Or was it stolen? Tena took it. But she doesn’t look like a pickpocket. She’s more of a highwayman kind of thief. Trock! I gave it to him. Three weeks ago. Strange, he never gave it back. I should ask him for it. Hey, that’s some nice brickwork. I love a good wall.

Klasten raised with crossbow and prepared to fire it at the girl if she took any offensive action.