TwiLyghtSansSparkles

*is eating a salad from Chipotle and browsing on her phone*

Cool. I'll post soonish, then.

So should I go first, or Voidus?

I like it. So she'd probably approach with a recording device and clipboard and gently ask what happened in there?

Maybe there would be another checkpoint sort of thing--another group of soldiers who screen the twins to see if they're really as worthy of execution as Reader seemed to think? He seems like the kind of guy who'd kill someone over one too many olives on his pizza, so there might be a check and balance system in place. If for no other reason than to ensure Reader isn't calling all the shots.

Fun fact: Wanting to know how many people wanted Nighthound dead, Nathan organized the Club of People Who Want Nighthound Dead. The membership numbers exceeded the population of Oregon.

I was going to say we need Doofenshmirtz to make a Day-in-the-life-inator to show Backtrack who he's complaining to, but then I realized his powers make him a walking, whining Day-in-the-life-inator. Is Vondra's motto "If it seems too good to be true, shoot it just in case?"

"Oh, you got shot in the arm? Cute." --Nathan and Sam, after having Backtrack sob about his "near-death experience"

"Wow. That guy sucks." --everyone who has ever met Reader

Posted by proxy for Mailliw: Sure, I've been trying to come up with something for Chi to do. Just post that when you want and I'll go from there.

I don't know how much help I'd be, since I'm not big on mythological creatures. I could give you a few names of books on Native American folklore, though.

"I need to know a few things for sure: Funtimes and Lightwards abilities? And what he's capable of. I've seen how you look at him, I've seen the way he acts, and I would feel alot better about the world if he no longer lived in it. Tell me what I need to know, and I could help you be rid of him. Permanently." Nathan was accustomed to giving Epics what they wanted, but Fade's question posed a conundrum. He wanted information on Lightwards and Funtimes. Abilities, limitations, what they were likely to do. In return, he offered to assist in removing Nighthound from the world, undoubtably making it a better place. It was a generous offer, but the answer he sought was taboo. Don't ever tell one Epic about another's abilities, even if they ask you. Hedge. Tell them to ask. Say only what you've seen for yourself. If you answer that question, you're allying yourself with the one who asked, and if they lose, you lose. This wasn't Newcago. He wasn't a servant. He could answer. If they lose, you lose. The bruise in his side ached. He couldn't form an alliance with Lightwards if he wanted to. And the way Nighthound looked at him…. "Lightwards is a necromancer, able to raise the dead as his slaves and cure himself of fatal wounds." He gave a wry smile, ignoring the twisting in his gut. "Had you asked him, the explanation would have been much longer, but that's all it is. Nighthound can heal himself, kill and enslave others for a time. As for Funtimes, I'm sure she'd be delighted to give you a demonstration, if you asked." She had threatened to kill Lightwards. Repeatedly, over a single punch. Most other Epics would have waited until Lightwards put a gun to his head. If he had to throw his lot in with someone, she was the only one for it. Timeport was an idiot. He marched on in, no escort, no nothing, claimed to be a former Reckoner, and acted like he expected CorpseMaker to pat him on the back. Part of Quota had to admire his gall, but another, larger part wanted to sit in the corner and mock him silently. "Do not Teleport around me like that again little Epic, Or I will destroy you completely. The only reason I haven't yet, is because you've laimed to know the weakness of Sightline." He tossed him to the floor. "If you're lying to me about that, You'd better wish you never came here." Fear swept into the room, invited by CorpseMaker and embraced by the other Epics. Quota closed his eyes and soaked it in. A smile spread across his face. He wasn't afraid. How could he be, when all these powerful Epics were doing it for him? Any one of them could take a lair on their own, probably, but here they were, standing straight and looking tough, while inside they were all cowering like little girls. Hilarious. Instead of laughing, Quota reached out toward their other emotions. Relief—oh, it's not me, thank Calamity it's not me. Satisfaction—stupid arrogant slontze, serves him right. Hope, his personal favorite—he's distracted, he won't see me, he hasn't seen me. Quota identified them all and took them into his hands as CorpseMaker crouched beside Timeport. He stomped them all down. Like a bonfire doused in lighter fluid, the fear in the room flared a little higher. As CorpseMaker lifted Timeport by the collar once more and posed another question, Quota basked in the fear of his fellow Epics.

What, making Koschei BFFs with Nighthound wasn't dark enough for you?

In that case, I can make the post a bit longer. And I just realized Nathan needs to reply to Fade, so I'll get on that.

I'd post for Quota, but using an entire post to say "Everyone else looked ready to bolt, but Quota stood there grinning like a madman" seems superfluous.

Remington shrugged. "You can have mine. I'll have Vondra scrub the face off, change it to yours." "So it'd be you, with a tiny version of Sam's face?" Nathan looked at the statue, as though picturing it. "That would be really creepy." "Yeah. Creepy enough to scare off any High Epic slontze who..." Remington brightened. "Hey! Vondra! I got an idea!"

Well, he hasn't been to The Dalles in two years, so if Vondra built it while he was gone, it could exist. He'd just have to brace himself for plenty of discomfort and disapproval, should Remington ever see it.

I did. There's not a lot of hero worship of Remington, at least not to the extreme that it might set Paladin off. Most everyone in The Dalles knew going up against Koschei was really hard on Remington, and while they're exceedingly grateful to him for killing Koschei, they treat him with the same sort of respect they'd show a veteran. Plus, Remington wouldn't tolerate being treated like a celebrity. Sorry about that downvote, Voidus. Someday, I'll learn my phone is in league with Quota.

Only if you promise the new Thor-like Lightwards can have an argument with Funtimes at some point. "Verily, my good Doctor, behold it, for it is the instrument of thy DOOM!" "And now it's a toilet plunger." "DOCTOR! Hast thou any idea what thou hast done?" "I turned your weapon thingy into something you'll REALLY need, now that Nighthound found a Taco Bell."

No. Lightwards is not allowed to talk like Thor and that is FINAL.

I hope you mean "throw" in the figurative sense….though knowing Lightwards, I wouldn't put it past him to aim a giant catapult at Altermind and fling idiots his way…..

Now I'm curious: What does he think Funtimes' weakness is?

I don't think you failed the Evil Overlord test so much as got out-tested by your brother. He's going to make one fine super villain one day, is what I'm saying.

And then Autumn can unwittingly cause him to continue his inner weeping. Also, I think I have another crack ship to rival Aldo/Wes.

Portland, Mrs. Voidus and I are waiting on Wraith, though I could post for Remington, and in The Dalles it's either Kobold or mail-mi.