Kobold King

Media isn't about "why." It's about "why not?"

I now have almost as many upvotes as there are years between now and the last major Ice Age. Thanks, Voidus! ...Oh wait. I'm not supposed to sound gleeful about that. Ahem, * sigh *. I guess now I have almost as many upvotes as there are years between now and the last major Ice Age. Bummer. Thanks a lot, Voidus. I vote Mistwraith. She's nicer.

There is a legend, told by some, that Kobold and Twi split away from the rest of the Reckoners that day. Camping out in the ingeniously hidden lair that is in no way located in Kobold's RV, they plot the day when they can bring cream-filled justice to the world...

Someone needs to put a dot over the "L" so it's spelled properly. Xaladin? We're counting on you.

"I can't believe you forgot an Epic despot's weakness!" "Well Kobold, it doesn't look like you remember it either." "I can't be blamed for that! Someone put a shiny object on my desk the day Mailliw sent it to me. It distracted me." "Fine. But what are we supposed to do now? He's almost got the doors broken down. We need to do something to fight him!" "Hold on. I think I'm remembering it..." And that is how Altermind was pelted with Oreo cookies during an assault on a Reckoners base.

Sure thing. I have it all typed up in another PM. I'll find it and send it to you. Also, it turns out that I already have Nighthound's weakness. Somehow I forgot about it. #whykoboldkingwouldmakeaterriblereckoner

Right away ma'am. Would you like that delivered with or without the multi-paragraph explanation for it?

Granted. You lose the ability to understand the metric system and your car explodes in a blazing ball of fire. I wish for a gritty reboot of Barney the Dinosaur with guns, explosions, and hitmen.

There already is.

I'm pretty much an open market where weaknesses are concerned. Especially for Nighthound's. I'll trade the weakness of any character I have in exchange for Nighthound's.

I'll trade you one of mine for Red's. I'm curious about hers.

* raises hand * What about asexual alien races or matriarchal societies? (Great prompt! )

Also, I can tell quite clearly that you guys are PMing back and forth right now. It's maddening.

You came up with one too? Which one, if I might ask without Lady Darthina redacting the topic, banning me from the board, and salting my fields to make them barren for the next three decades?

How many? I know four, counting the one that I came up with. ...Pity upvote. His backstory would be the most ridiculously awesome in the history of backstories.

Turnips are rotten. Not being a GM, I have no secrets. Well, that's not entirely true. I know most of Twi's characters' weaknesses.

Ye of little faith. There's always a way if you're crazy lonely enough.

Now Edgedancer is going to start his own PM conversation with a bucket, a bag of flour, and a turnip.

Absolutely. Also, one last test of Funtimes' cuteness: Funtimes in four mismatched shoes. Taken from an image I made this morning, for reasons I am not at liberty to discuss.

I'm measuring a spike in kilo'dawws... huh. She actually made it up to seventeen with that outfit. Requesting senior researcher's permission to post a ":wub:" smiley. Test No. 5 and 6: Funtimes in Remington and Generic Evil Overlord outfits:

Hmm... twelve kilod'awws, compared to Sam's fourteen. Still good, especially considering Koschei himself scores in the negative range of kilod'awws when he's tested in anything. Test No. 3: Funtimes in Fortuity's vest and fedora.

Hmm... I'm still reading thirteen kilod'awws from that image. Let's try putting her in Slaughterhouse's labcoat:

Well I'm giggling uncontrollably now. Funtimes looks cute in whatever costume you put her in, oddly enough.

Something like that, I suppose. Introductory posts are hard. Can't wait. ...that's it. David needs a fedora.