Kobold King

An epic space opera RP, centered in a distant galaxy where the creation of new alien species is encouraged? An opportunity to play as one of the million extraterrestrial concepts rolling around in my head? Once again, I'm torn between realizing I realistically don't have enough time for this, and wanting desperately to be a part of it.

"Explaining what I'm doing to you."

The word "wench" was similarly a term of endearment, as I learned in a very sweet scene in Shakespeare's The Tempest where Prospero gently asks his daughter "Will you bring us some kindling, wench?" I have been advised not to imitate Shakespeare's language when speaking to the women in my life.

"But Danielle, don't you want to move to Spokane with us?" "Sorry mom... but I Spocan't." Is that how your conversation with them about it is gonna go?

The word "gadzooks" was once an extremely severe curse word. It's etymology descends from the phrase "God's wounds," referring to the wounds Jesus Christ suffered on the cross.

Well the thing about Deathwish is that--OK, fine, I won't answer that question.

And that's even with a downvote I got for it. People around seem to like twisty spoiler tag mazes, for the most part.

This Ewok is also an otter.

Oooookay. That's enough internet for today.

Warning: Massive spoilers for that thing you haven't read yet.

Why do I even need to write RP posts when you summarize them so neatly and concisely, Twi?

Though I've never read it, I'm going to guess Discworld for some reason? Whatever it is, I kind of want to read it now.

Raptors and a few other assorted dinosaurs found their way to Lightwards' side, fixing him with obedient stares as he heard the lesser Epic's begging. A smile tugged at his lips as the man dropped to one knee, head bowed and shoulders shaking in fear. So this is what respect feels like, Lightwards thought with satisfaction. It's a treatment that's evaded of me for a long time now. "3 others, down below," the old man explained quickly. "One has explosive capabilities, she may try to blow up even part of the museum if she's not stopped." Lightwards' expression switched from one of pleasure to anger in a second, as his fingers whitened around the grip of his gun. "Already?" he spat, casting a glance in the direction the Epic had indicated. "Already they strive to take what I've earned away from me?" He looked back to his captive, only to find that the man was missing. Now thoroughly surprised, he walked through the entrance way, peering off the edge of the floating fortress and into the dark plummet below. Sure enough, the small form of the Epic could be seen hurtling through the darkness, growing smaller and smaller until a parachute that had certainly not been on his person a minute ago activated and slowed his descent. "Of course," Lightwards grumbled. He beckoned the enormous allosaur forward, and it approached the edge of the Museum with booming steps. He pointed off the edge of the abyss, and uttered a single word. "Kill." Without a moment's hesitation, the massive carnivore thundered off the edge of the Museum, roaring as it went down. It hurtled through the air, contorting itself closer to its as it became a grey dot that blended in with the darkness. Perhaps it was wishful thinking, but Lightwards thought he saw the speck of the white parachute disappear completely as the grey dot passed it by. Satisfied, Lightwards stood on the edge and whistled, summoning forth a couple of large Pteranodons that swooped and glided around him. They seemed to be having difficulty staying airborne in the cold Oregon air, but they had enough lift to fulfill the purpose he had in mind for them. "I saw a platform on the sides of the Museum," he said to the pterosaurs, holding out his arms wide. "You will take me and deposit me to its surface." Understanding his orders, even with a brain too small to comprehend them, one of the enormous pterodactyls swooped to the edge of the Museum and seized its Emperor by the shoulders and began flying him lower. It was thus that, letting out a yell of pain as his arms felt like they were being wrenched violently from their sockets, Lightwards was dropped at high speed onto the hard diamond floor. He hissed out several choice curses as he shoved himself up, rubbing his bruised face and trying to determine whether his nose was broken. I will never attempt to travel that way again, he thought furiously, casting a glare at the now triumphantly squawking pterodactyl. Painful and undignified... Blinking in the dim light, he then realized he was standing just before Lucentia, who was smirking at him from the top of her diamond throne. Of course. Lightwards casually brushed himself off and gave no indication he'd just been dropped painfully on his face, instead casting a look around the platform with a scowl. Aside from Lucentia and himself, the platform was empty save for Nighthound and the battered woman he was currently groping. As attempting to pry Nighthound from his current occupation would likely prove fruitless, Lightwards instead turned to Lucentia and gave her a stiff nod. "I had the fortune to face two of the attackers by the entrance," he informed her curtly. "How many have you succeeded in killing or--" He cast another look at the terrified Epic whose dress Nighthound was threatening to rip off, and glanced back to the diamond queen with a disgusted grimace. "--neutralizing?"

How do you think your participation on this site would be different if you'd read a Cosmere book like Mistborn or Warbreaker before reading Steelheart? Would there be a Cosmere RP instead of What Happened in Oregon?

As always, it's flattering that you actually take the time to read this crazy game of ours. Also, your saying you like Backtrack is the best thing to happen to him in a while.

That is adorable. One of my cats likes to sleep in people's sandals, but a pug that fetches people's shoes and other assorted gifts is priceless.

Thanks for the sympathy, guys. Especially for Pinkie Pie and the ocelot. And I'd love to hear about those shoes, Twi.

STORM IT I finally got around to writing an RP post, or at least a sizable part of one, when I accidentally closed the tab I was writing it in. On the one day I'd forgotten to back up my work. The auto-save only saved about half of my Backtrack post, and I lost what I'd written entirely for Glamour. Coupled with my left over grumpiness and bad mood, all I really want to do now is shove my face in a pillow and scream.

Say hi to the 20th century for me.

The game is set exclusively in the state of Oregon--though he could have been a researcher in the Antarctic before Calamity rose and he made his way to the Pacific Northwest.

Thanks, but I've got it covered. On that note, am I the only one who thinks "Brain Bleach" could make a decent pony OC who works in a mental institution?

Hijack? I haven't greeted Jack in weeks! ... That... sounded funnier in my head.

What you really need is a hobby, Mary. One that doesn't involve flesh-eating centipedes.