The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

[Jaywalk he/him]

Illogic was the lifeblood of TLT, however.

[NameIess]

Which is why The Champion was made partially immune to it. in order to be a legitimate threat to the narrators.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

All of a sudden, TVG realized how sad she was at the current state of TLT. The once-beautiful thread of randomness had been turned into an odd wasteland of demented plot-like weirdness. She regretfully sighed, realizing that some of this was partially her fault. But she hoped she might be able to help to reverse the damage that had been done. 

[NameIess]

4 minutes ago, Shard of Thought said:

All of a sudden, TVG realized how sad she was at the current state of TLT. The once-beautiful thread of randomness had been turned into an odd wasteland of demented plot-like weirdness. She regretfully sighed, realizing that some of this was partially her fault. But she hoped she might be able to help to reverse the damage that had been done. 

PLOT-LIKE WEIRDNESS!?! I call that plot. (Unless you're talking about this battle.)

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

I speak of the so-called battle, TVG said flatly. If you wish for plot, then do it correctly. 

[Jaywalk he/him]

We now return to our regularly scheduled—but often delayed—randomness.

There was once an old man who lived by the ocean.

[NameIess]

5 minutes ago, Shard of Thought said:

I speak of the so-called battle, TVG said flatly. If you wish for plot, then do it correctly. 

"What? They insulted my power, attacked me with my own magic system. What did you want me to do? Summoning The Champion was the natural course of action." Nameless continued eating his popcorn.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

TVG summoned the great Butt Venture. A warrior from times of old. 

[NameIess]

Nameless looked at Butt Venture disinterestedly. "Why'd you summon him?" He looked back to the champion. "HEY BUDDY! THANKS FOR THE HELP! YOU CAN GO NOW." The Champion disappeared back to the land of candy.

[Jaywalk he/him]

One day, a boat landed on the old man’s shore.

[The Awakened Salad they/them]

Yes, randomness is back!

It was a goat boat. 

[NameIess]

Which meant that the boat was piloted by goats. It was actually a warship.

[The Awakened Salad they/them]

They were seeking refuge from the old man. 

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

They had committed war crimes on the goat boat, and the sheep were now after them.

[xinoehp512 he/him]

On 3/26/2020 at 5:46 PM, xinoehp512 said:

Jacob felt his heart accelerate.

"Why..." he whispered. "Why...?"

The mime complimented Lunamor on her cake, although he generally preferred other genres mixed in to the flavor.

The Witherlord moved with the darkness, melting into the shadow of the clouds. His voice hissed forth from all around Jacob, eerie and dissonant.

"Fate has decreed it..."

And at that, Jacob felt a chill deep in his soul.

[BringerofShadows she/her]

 

So the old man said he take the goats in as long as he got to eat one of them. 

[NameIess]

The goats stared at the old man. One of them spoke up: "Well, we were running low on rations anyways."

 

That night, the goats feasted. The old man's house provided an excellent place to lay low, and if his neighbors came by to ask where he was... Well... Rations were still a little low.

[Jaywalk he/him]

The old man sighed. “Well, I was going into town to get groceries anyway.”

[xinoehp512 he/him]

While he was out, the goats ate all his neighbors groceries as well.

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

As the old man left the grocery store, he saw a massive herd of people running towards the store. All were coming because their groceries had been eaten.

[Jaywalk he/him]

There was one goat who ruled o’er all the rest.

[Truthless of Shinovar he/him]

His name was...

[Lunamor she/her]

Bonk Bonk.

[The Awakened Salad they/them]

And there was his second in command, Honk Honk. 

[xinoehp512 he/him]

He was dreadfully jealous of the first in command.