Sami she/her Posted November 18, 2018 Author Posted November 18, 2018 (edited) Spoiler Edited November 18, 2018 by Sami resized 13
Mistrunner Posted December 5, 2018 Posted December 5, 2018 Why couldn't Beethoven find his music teacher? Because he was Haydn! 9
Ashspren Posted January 20, 2019 Posted January 20, 2019 (edited) Near or far, wherEEEEEEver you are, I do know that this thread must live on... Edit: Should I put the images in a spoiler tag? Yes, yes I should. Spoiler Edited January 20, 2019 by Ashspren 10
Showman he/him Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 Why did the percussionist play the crash cymbals? He couldn't handle the suspense! 8
Ink he/him Posted February 3, 2019 Posted February 3, 2019 (edited) Oh man, that’s surprisingly accurate. I’m probably the 2nd on T-bone, but most of the others are the first edit: to this one beneath me. It got moved Edited February 4, 2019 by Ink
Vogelsang he/him Posted February 3, 2019 Posted February 3, 2019 My previous post was deleted because I was an idiot and had language not allowed on forums in it. Yeah, I really should of known the rules regarding language in pictures. Anyway, I did my best to edit the language into an understandable and viewer friendly form. 9
Jaywalk he/him Posted February 4, 2019 Posted February 4, 2019 On 2/3/2019 at 11:49 AM, Daybone said: My previous post was deleted because I was an idiot and had language not allowed on forums in it. Yeah, I really should of known the rules regarding language in pictures. Anyway, I did my best to edit the language into an understandable and viewer friendly form. This is so true...
Vogelsang he/him Posted February 5, 2019 Posted February 5, 2019 This beauty has been hanging up in my school’s band room all year, so I figured I’d show it to you. 6
Kureshi Ironclaw Posted February 6, 2019 Posted February 6, 2019 On 2/4/2019 at 5:49 AM, Daybone said: My previous post was deleted because I was an idiot and had language not allowed on forums in it. Yeah, I really should of known the rules regarding language in pictures. Anyway, I did my best to edit the language into an understandable and viewer friendly form. Every Bari sax player I've met is female. Am I doing this wrong?
Zephrun’s Imperium they/he Posted February 7, 2019 Posted February 7, 2019 Alright, funny story. In our band we only have two percussionists, so a lot of times we have other players fill in for different parts. Anyway, our teacher asked if our percussionists could fit the triangle into the song we're playing. Immediately one of the tubas raised their hand and our teacher said, "Not a chance, tubas, you guys didn't pass the test in 5th grade." 4
Sunbird she/her Posted February 18, 2019 Posted February 18, 2019 On 2/15/2019 at 9:17 PM, Sami said: Alternatively: "Gotta go to marching band practice." 5
Kelsier'sGodComplex she/her Posted February 26, 2019 Posted February 26, 2019 Why couldn't the string orchestra find their conductor? He was Haydn. What is Beethoven's favorite food? BANANA-NAAAA 4
Kelsier'sGodComplex she/her Posted February 26, 2019 Posted February 26, 2019 Middle C, E flat, and G walk into a bar. "Sorry, we don't serve minors." 2
Kelsier'sGodComplex she/her Posted February 26, 2019 Posted February 26, 2019 My sister, @Mailnaise plays viola, so I'm allowed to do this one. What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed. 4
Kidpen he/him Posted February 26, 2019 Posted February 26, 2019 Hey, fyi God Complex, the moderators frown on posting multiple times in a row. If you have more to say, just edit your original post. The jokes are very good though!
Mailnaise she/her Posted February 27, 2019 Posted February 27, 2019 22 hours ago, Kelsier'sGodComplex said: My sister, @Mailnaise plays viola, so I'm allowed to do this one. What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed. Correction, it means you aren't allowed, okay? What about cello jokes, @Kelsier'sGodComplex, huh? I play in better tune than you do... (jkjk)
Kelsier'sGodComplex she/her Posted February 27, 2019 Posted February 27, 2019 1 hour ago, Mailnaise said: Correction, it means you aren't allowed, okay? What about cello jokes, @Kelsier'sGodComplex, huh? I play in better tune than you do... (jkjk) Cellos aren't the butt of any jokes that I know of. Of course you could change any music joke to make a cello joke, but there is no original ones.
Mailnaise she/her Posted February 27, 2019 Posted February 27, 2019 1 hour ago, Kelsier'sGodComplex said: Cellos aren't the butt of any jokes that I know of. Of course you could change any music joke to make a cello joke, but there is no original ones. How convenient...I bet there are cello jokes if you looked for them
Kelsier'sGodComplex she/her Posted February 27, 2019 Posted February 27, 2019 I'd rather remain ignorant of them, if there is any.
Sami she/her Posted March 3, 2019 Author Posted March 3, 2019 On 28/02/2019 at 2:48 AM, Kelsier'sGodComplex said: Cellos aren't the butt of any jokes that I know of. Of course you could change any music joke to make a cello joke, but there is no original ones. A violinist noticed at the end of each rehearsal break, one of the cellists would look at the inside flap of his jacket before he sat down to resume rehearsal. This continued for several decades, and the violinist became quite curious about it. One day, during hot weather, the cellist took off his jacket and went off on break. The violinist waited until everyone was off the platform, looked around, and sneaked over to the jacket. He pulled back the flap and saw a little note pinned on the inside. It read: "Cello left hand, bow right." yeah I looked it up. who knows if it's original or not. 1
Kelsier'sGodComplex she/her Posted March 3, 2019 Posted March 3, 2019 13 hours ago, Sami said: A violinist noticed at the end of each rehearsal break, one of the cellists would look at the inside flap of his jacket before he sat down to resume rehearsal. This continued for several decades, and the violinist became quite curious about it. One day, during hot weather, the cellist took off his jacket and went off on break. The violinist waited until everyone was off the platform, looked around, and sneaked over to the jacket. He pulled back the flap and saw a little note pinned on the inside. It read: "Cello left hand, bow right." yeah I looked it up. who knows if it's original or not. That's just mean, but some the cellists in my orchestra need that. One of them stopped in the middle of a preformance to BRUSH HIS HAIR! When I talked to him about it later, he accused me of doing it. I do not like that cellist.
Showman he/him Posted March 6, 2019 Posted March 6, 2019 (edited) *spoilers didn't work out as planned, just open everything* Here's a couple: First, I got this song in band. It's not supposed to be a joke (it's a very serious song), but it's hard not to laugh at it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eb-efaaygH4 These are the pictures of the music. The first page is mostly resting. (poor flutes on oboe parts play 21 notes total) The back is just ridiculous. I think the song should be summarized like this: Lastly, a band joke my science teacher told me: A Russian, a Cuban, a Band Director, and a Trumpet player are on a train. The Russian takes out some vodka, takes a sip, and throws the bottle out the window. The others are aghast. "Why would you do that?" they asked. "That's authentic, expensive vodka!". The Russian waves them away. "I've got plenty where I live. It's common. I don't need it." Next, the Cuban pulls out a cigar, takes a smoke, and throws the cigar out the window. The others, once again, are astonished. "Why would you do that?" they asked. "That's an authentic, expensive cigar!". The Cuban waves them away. "I've got plenty where I live, almost too many. They're too common. I don't need any more." Then, the band director picks up the trumpet player and throws him out the window. Edited March 6, 2019 by Showman Spoilers didn't work out 7
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