Having a Bad Day?: Get 'yer Hugs here!!

[Draginon he/him]

7 hours ago, Blightsong said:

Today I got called a n***** and an abomination (I'm mixed race) by a white supremicist. I haven't really had to deal with these people before in real life but recent events seem to have gotten them out of hiding. Feels pretty bad to be seen as nothing more than an animal.

I just don't get racists and bigots at all. It's not like we can control our skin color like we're Kandra for the Lord Ruler's sake!

I got a racist treatment as well almost a year back, the only difference being that I'm white and the racist was black. Pretty much it was at the Texas State Fair and this guy was working the chevy test drive area. I don't really care that much for the whole thing but my mom likes doing it. I decided to do one of the trucks and that's where this guy was stationed. Almost immediately he was giving me the stinkeye and a look of 'is this white kid really coming over here?' (I was 25 at the time) and he kept talking down to me like I didn't even know what a car was. Then when it came to the actual drive he gave me the signal to go, I get my foot off the brake and he yells "I didn't tell you to go!" and it scared me when he did that. I put my foot back on the brake and then he immediately tells me to go. I get through the first obstacle, a simple s curve/ dodging the flags but before the second obstacle he made me get out of the truck so that he could drive the whole obstacle course because "I don't feel safe with you driving the rest." Lots of white people talk about being 'discriminated' against but that was truly discriminating because his attitude just made it feel like he didn't trust a white person to drive anything.

[Orlion Blight he/him]

@Draginon Sooo, that was racist because he was black and you are white? There appears to be no support for your claim except "he was black" which is very problematic. 

That's an example of white privilege, when you can say, "That black man was less than cordial to me! He was racist!" and expect to be taken seriously. 

[Calderis he/him]

@Draginon I have to agree with @Orlion On a Cob here. 

What he did could be fully explained by him being in a bad mood. 

There is a pretty big difference between your assigning motivation to a man's actions, and to someone openly harassing another person and using racial slurs. 

Edited August 16, 2017 by Calderis

[Draginon he/him]

1 hour ago, Orlion On a Cob said:

@Draginon Sooo, that was racist because he was black and you are white? There appears to be no support for your claim except "he was black" which is very problematic. 

That's an example of white privilege, when you can say, "That black man was less than cordial to me! He was racist!" and expect to be taken seriously. 

But if the color was reversed people would claim it's racist but because it's not it isn't??? What kind of troll logic is that??? Also it's not about 'white privilege', I don't expect to be treated better because of my skin color just an equal, it's about common human decency. When people don't take racist actions against whites as serious as racist actions against every other race then that's a huge problem.

59 minutes ago, Calderis said:

@Draginon I have to agree with @Orlion On a Cob here. 

What he did could be fully explained by him being in a bad mood. 

There is a pretty big difference between your assigning motivation to a man's actions, and to someone openly harassing another person and using racial slurs. 

Except I watched him after that and he definitely wasn't in a bad mood. Also racism isn't just about slurs and open harassment but also attitude towards towards those of a different race, such as purposely excluding someone because of their skin color, ethnicity or nationality.

 

Edit: Also to both of you, I only put the cliffnotes version, like they do on the news when they do those racism reports, because I felt just like how black people say they feel when they've been discriminated against so I'm not comfortable putting down the whole thing here. I have told the whole thing to my girlfriend, she's a minority by the way so she's definitely been discriminated against, and she couldn't believe how that guy treated me when I had told her.

Edited August 16, 2017 by Draginon

[Calderis he/him]

8 minutes ago, Draginon said:

Except I watched him after that and he definitely wasn't in a bad mood. Also racism isn't just about slurs and open harassment but also attitude towards towards those of a different race, such as purposely excluding someone because of their skin color, ethnicity or nationality.

I don't disagree with you, but your original post definitely didn't make that clear, and in contrast to what you were responding too comes across as presumptuous and insensitive to the post you replied to. 

Edited August 16, 2017 by Calderis

[Draginon he/him]

5 minutes ago, Calderis said:

I don't disagree with you, but your original post definitely didn't make that clear, and in contrast to what you were responding too comes across as presumptuous and insensitive to the post you replied to. 

And how is sharing one story of discrimination insensitive exactly?

[Calderis he/him]

3 minutes ago, Draginon said:

And how is sharing one story of discrimination insensitive exactly?

Because as I already said, it came across as you proscribing motivations to someone elses actions as racist, without context to make it clear, in contrast to an overt racial slur.

It didn’t come across as you sharing a story of descrimination. It came across as you deciding someone was racist because you felt slighted. 

As I already said, I don't think racism has to be something overt, but your original anecdote didn't include enough context to appear to be anything more than someone having a bad day and you inserting motivations for their actions. 

Does that make sense? 

[Draginon he/him]

11 minutes ago, Calderis said:

Because as I already said, it came across as you proscribing motivations to someone elses actions as racist, without context to make it clear, in contrast to an overt racial slur.

It didn’t come across as you sharing a story of descrimination. It came across as you deciding someone was racist because you felt slighted. 

As I already said, I don't think racism has to be something overt, but your original anecdote didn't include enough context to appear to be anything more than someone having a bad day and you inserting motivations for their actions. 

Does that make sense? 

If you go back to my first reply to you I added an edit there explaining my story just a tad better. I just didn't put the full story because it was something personal I put and was not comfortable saying the whole thing which is why I only put the simple version up and clarified for you in your response.

Also if it was a mere slight I wouldn't put it down as racist, I deal with rude people all the time at work so I know the difference, and I would've complained to the people in charge.

[Calderis he/him]

Just now, Draginon said:

If you go back to my first reply to you I added an edit there explaining my story just a tad better. I just didn't put the full story because it was something personal I put and was not comfortable saying the whole thing which is why I only put the simple version up and clarified for you in your response.

Also if it was a mere slight I wouldn't put it down as racist, I deal with rude people all the time at work so I know the difference, and I would've complained to the people in charge.

And with your clarification it makes more sense. My issue was all in the lack of context in the initial anecdote as it was written. 

I didn't mean this to be a personal attack. I'm just commenting on how it appeared in the given context. 

[Draginon he/him]

5 minutes ago, Calderis said:

And with your clarification it makes more sense. My issue was all in the lack of context in the initial anecdote as it was written. 

I didn't mean this to be a personal attack. I'm just commenting on how it appeared in the given context. 

I understand. Do you want me to go back and edit it with the context or leave as is? 

Your response wasn't quite an attack as much as On The Cob's was with his 'white privilege' comment making it seem like I'm whining for whining sakes and yours just happened to be after his so I might've come off a little stronger than I intended.

Edited August 16, 2017 by Draginon

[Orlion Blight he/him]

54 minutes ago, Draginon said:

But if the color was reversed people would claim it's racist but because it's not it isn't??? What kind of troll logic is that??? Also it's not about 'white privilege', I don't expect to be treated better because of my skin color just an equal, it's about common human decency. When people don't take racist actions against whites as serious as racist actions against every other race then that's a huge problem.

Except I watched him after that and he definitely wasn't in a bad mood. Also racism isn't just about slurs and open harassment but also attitude towards towards those of a different race, such as purposely excluding someone because of their skin color, ethnicity or nationality.

 

Edit: Also to both of you, I only put the cliffnotes version, like they do on the news when they do those racism reports, because I felt just like how black people say they feel when they've been discriminated against so I'm not comfortable putting down the whole thing here. I have told the whole thing to my girlfriend, she's a minority by the way so she's definitely been discriminated against, and she couldn't believe how that guy treated me when I had told her.

You have absolutely not proven in any way that it was a racist action. Bad customer service does not equate racism just because the other person is black. You are not a victim. You are not terrorized or threatened with physical harm because you are thought less then human. Your "woe is me, I know what racism feels like because someone gave me the stink eye and made me sad" story is not anything close to the real deal. 

[Kaymyth she/her]

OK, guys. The car dude was a chullbrain. On this we can all agree.

As for the rest, let's save the "topic spirals out of control until everybody is yelling at each other and nobody is happy" for Facebook, shall we?

[Draginon he/him]

41 minutes ago, Orlion On a Cob said:

You have absolutely not proven in any way that it was a racist action. Bad customer service does not equate racism just because the other person is black. You are not a victim. You are not terrorized or threatened with physical harm because you are thought less then human. Your "woe is me, I know what racism feels like because someone gave me the stink eye and made me sad" story is not anything close to the real deal. 

Let me just leave you with this, if I did everything single thing he did to me instead I'd be the one getting into legal action. It was more than a stink eye, but that's the best way to describe how it looked without saying he looked at me like I was rust on his shoes.

Now I'm going to take Kaymyth's advice and end this discussion right here.

[Kaymyth she/her]

9 minutes ago, Draginon said:

Let me just leave you with this, if I did everything single thing he did to me instead I'd be the one getting into legal action. It was more than a stink eye, but that's the best way to describe how it looked without saying he looked at me like I was rust on his shoes.

Now I'm going to take Kaymyth's advice and end this discussion right here.

It was less "advice" and more "putting on my Moderator hat."

[Draginon he/him]

40 minutes ago, Kaymyth said:

It was less "advice" and more "putting on my Moderator hat."

It just felt politer to call it advice than that if he decided to continue.

[Chaos he/him]

28 minutes ago, Draginon said:

It just felt politer to call it advice than that if he decided to continue.

Okay, but to be clear, our job is to make sure things don't spiral out of control. Please respect this. 

Let's move onto other matters. 

[Draginon he/him]

7 minutes ago, Chaos said:

Okay, but to be clear, our job is to make sure things don't spiral out of control. Please respect this. 

Let's move onto other matters. 

Crystal clear. I'm someone who does respect mods so if a mod says stop I'll stop.

[Chaos he/him]

3 minutes ago, Draginon said:

Crystal clear. I'm someone who does respect mods so if a mod says stop I'll stop.

Thank you! 

[Sparkrunner he/him]

First day of school was awful

[Silverblade5 he/him]

Due to an unexpected weight lifting session, practice ran late, and I ended up showing up an hour late for work. And it's my second shift for the day. 

Edited August 17, 2017 by Silverblade5

[Orlion Blight he/him]

5 hours ago, Roadwalker said:

First day of school was awful

 What grade did you start? 

1 hour ago, Silverblade5 said:

Due to an unexpected weight lifting session, practice ran late, and I ended up showing up an hour late for work. And it's my second shift for the day. 

Ugh. 

Shouldn't be a problem, I hope! You should have built up quite a bit of good will with all the extra hours you've been working. 

[Silverblade5 he/him]

1 hour ago, Orlion On a Cob said:

 What grade did you start? 

Ugh. 

Shouldn't be a problem, I hope! You should have built up quite a bit of good will with all the extra hours you've been working. 

Those nights, when a weekday close takes as long as a weekend close (we close an hour later on weekends). Silver lining: I had an excuse to buy everyone Wendy's. I do this whenever we stay past 10:00. 

Edited August 17, 2017 by Silverblade5

[A Budgie she/her]

So...there was a maths test today, and I got pretty stressed about it...
I mean, I prepared well for it, so I didn't think I had anything to worry about, but when I was doing it I just got really stressed. There wasn't much time, either, so I felt pretty constricted and didn't get much of an opportunity to take my time and work through the questions. Plus, on the last question I did a whole load of working out, before realising I had counted something wrong and that I had to redo the entire thing from the beginning.
Add this to the fact that I have high expectations of myself and hold myself in comparison to everyone else...
It got to the point where I actually cried (I cry easily. Really easily, whenever I get stressed).
I know it's stupid to be upset over this, but there you go.

[Darkness Ascendant he/him]

1 hour ago, A Budgie said:

So...there was a maths test today, and I got pretty stressed about it...
I mean, I prepared well for it, so I didn't think I had anything to worry about, but when I was doing it I just got really stressed. There wasn't much time, either, so I felt pretty constricted and didn't get much of an opportunity to take my time and work through the questions. Plus, on the last question I did a whole load of working out, before realising I had counted something wrong and that I had to redo the entire thing from the beginning.
Add this to the fact that I have high expectations of myself and hold myself in comparison to everyone else...
It got to the point where I actually cried (I cry easily. Really easily, whenever I get stressed).
I know it's stupid to be upset over this, but there you go.

*ruffles hair, I'm sure you did fine  

It's not stupid at all, I do that all the time in math tests...like, only math tests...
And man, I was in shock after a few of of those.

I hate it when they put constricting time limits on the math questions, I prefer to work through them at my own pace, but the environment and the fact that I've become a failure accepting student when it comes to math and simply don't prepare/study for the exams, so I just sit there doing whatever comes to my mind, then I look at my results and shrug, "Its not like I tried, so its ok that I barely passed" etc

See, you, you tried, you worked hard and you put in the effort, you got stressed over it, you put it all in. You will be fine   I believe in you

[Sparkrunner he/him]

2 hours ago, Darkness Ascendant said:

*ruffles hair, I'm sure you did fine  

It's not stupid at all, I do that all the time in math tests...like, only math tests...
And man, I was in shock after a few of of those.

I hate it when they put constricting time limits on the math questions, I prefer to work through them at my own pace, but the environment and the fact that I've become a failure accepting student when it comes to math and simply don't prepare/study for the exams, so I just sit there doing whatever comes to my mind, then I look at my results and shrug, "Its not like I tried, so its ok that I barely passed" etc

See, you, you tried, you worked hard and you put in the effort, you got stressed over it, you put it all in. You will be fine   I believe in you

I can do most other stuff but math makes me cry.