The Knights Awkward

[Le Sigh]

(OOC to @RubiksCube: Le Sigh wasn't actually saying your username, but I just put it there so you guys know I'm talking about you. Though, since he can channel the Surge of Meta-tation, I guess...)

@Silva @Inklingspren

"No," he replied to Silva. "You humans have plagued my- have plagued our home long enough. It is time that you left this place, whether you like it or not. This world belongs to the Fanshendi, which you humans took from us. And yes, you did do something to me, Inklingspren. Your entire race did."

Then, as RubiksCube - or, as he apparently went, "Jeirid" - made a speech that would've been inspiring and rousing if it's actual content hadn't been meaningless, Le Sigh smiled. "Then you shall die, and Forium shall reign." He lunged at the man with his Blade.

[Silva]

But Le Sigh bumped backwards. There appeared to be an invisible wall preventing him from harming Jeirid or as he'd soon find out, anybody. Silva didn't feel bad doing a little god-modding - she wanted to see how things would play out if violence wasn't an option.

@Le Sigh

[Dustbringer12 he/him]

Jeirid throws a sodium bookie

[Ink he/him]

Ink watches, wondering why the heck he is here. He takes a sip of dihydrogen monoxide, wondering why mister sigh was so angry. "I don't represent 'my race,' I'm just a lone person. I don't know what my people did or why they did it, but I'm sorry for... whatever they did to you."

Edited October 14, 2018 by Inklingspren

[Vogelsang he/him]

So wait, what if a release date happens on my birthday? I mean Skywards release just happens to fall on the day of my birth so it can't really be before. Either way, happy birthday to me I guess, I mean, its not everyday that you get a birthday present like that...and I'm rambling. This is awkward. Can't wait for Skyward!

[Le Sigh]

@Silva @Ladrian

@RubiksCube @Inklingspren

Le Sigh charged right at Jeirid - and then found himself flying in the opposite direction. He landed hard on his Awkward-plated bottom. "Ugh! What... the hell?!" Le Sigh squinted, channeling a bit of Meta, and could sort of make out the structure of a sort of force that would normally be intangible to the human eye. "Clever," the warrior appraised grudgingly.

At that moment, a sodium bookie clanked against Le Sigh's feet.

The huge explosion shook the room, knocking over many books and destroying countless others. The fires were not only limited to the fireplace. Soot and ash was everywhere. And where Le Sigh had formerly been was a large crater in the stone floor.

A crater in which Le Sigh currently sat, Booklight streaming from the countless cracks in his armor.

"That," he said, "Hurt."

At that moment, Inklingspren began apologizing to Le Sigh, some sort of speech about "his race" having nothing to do with the Fanshendi, but that he was . "Hmm... now that you mention it, you do look different from the humans I and my people have encountered. I accept your apology, so long as you stand down."

Then, some random guy walked through the doors and started talking about how the release date for some book was on the same day as his birthday. Not only did it break the tension, it was fairly Out-Of-Context and cheesed Le Sigh off a bit (despite the fact that he had already channeled the Surge of Metagaming twice now). "Does this look like a chatroom to you?!" the Fanshendi warrior snapped.

[Furamirionind They/Any/All]

Fura was minding his own business on the shard, when he suddenly heard a bunch of noise as if a battle was happening to his left.  Instead of turning away and running, he turned towards the noise.  What was happening? He walked over to the wall, and felt around, and found a secret door.  He pulled on the handle and saw a fancy door behind the secret one.  This door was engraved with the words:

Books before friends.
17th Shard before the real world.
Release dates before birthdays.

These words looked strangely familiar to Fura, but he wasn't sure why.
As he opened the door, he was greeted by an explosion.  Before he knew what he was saying, Fura spoke the words, "I will read all Brandon, even if it is not Cosmere".

A bunch of books on the walls sprang to life and shielded Fura from the explosion.

Quote

I spoke the first ideal when I read my first Brandon Sanderson book. : )

 

[Dustbringer12 he/him]

" *Sodium bookies explode?  I thought Sadeas and Odium would get along because they deserve each other."  Jeiried then remembers that he was going to reread WoR, and activates a secret passage on one of the bookshelf walls, entering a reading room, and leaving Le Sigh hanging in his quest to disembowel Jeirid and see what he is made of inside (or so Jeirid thinks).

* - Goto this page, and this page for the birth of bookies and of sodium bookies

 

[Silva]

But the explosion wouldn't have hurt Fura anyways because of Silva's previously instituted no violence policy. 

[Furamirionind They/Any/All]

But Fura didn't realize that.  Similar to the "rubber hand illusion" psychology experiment.  If you feel like you will be hurt, regardless to whether you will or not, you will still respond as is you will be.

(Plus, I didn't read all 33 pages of this thread before posting... Shame on me... : )   )

[Le Sigh]

@Furamirionind @Silva @RubiksCube

As Le Sigh was getting to his feet, Jeirid opened a secret passageway and left the room.

"No! Don't you dare leave this battle!" the warrior shouted. He began to run, vaulting out of the crater, though he had a little bit of trouble because his armor was so damaged. "Screw this!" he cried, and sharply inhaled. Immediately, Booklight streamed from the countless books lying around into Le Sigh, fueling him and repairing his armor. Most of the books disintegrated into dust shortly afterwards. "There! Now I am ready!"

Just then, some random guy said the Oath of the Knights Awkward. Le Sigh whirled on him. "NO!!! You will never do all those things, because I will kill you first! I WILL KILL ALL OF YOU!!!" The warrior paused for a few seconds, then added "EXCLUDING INKLINGSPREN, AS HE IS NOT A HUMAN OF THIS WORLD!!!"

Le Sigh then charged right at Furamirionind, slashing through the books with his Awkwardblade and preparing to strike the fool down.

[Silva]

Silva shook her head in exasperation. How long would it take before @Le Sigh realized that he wouldn't be able to kill anyone so long as the anti-violence field was in place. It was time for a little more god-modding, things were getting repetitive. Silva chuckled softly and made the Fanshendi's sword turn into a stick the size of a piece of kindling.

"Awkwardblades are weapons of the Knights Awkward," she said in explanation, though she doubted anyone was listening. "Why would he want to wield the weapon of his enemies?"

[MacThorstenson he/him]

I has been retconned. Ignore this. :/

 

 

Edited December 4, 2018 by Ookla the [REDACTED]

[Snipexe he/him]

Edited for Le Sigh

Edited December 4, 2018 by Ookla the Skeptical

[BitBitio he/him]

Nothing happened.

Edited December 5, 2018 by Ookla

[Ink he/him]

 

Ink was utterly confused. So he blew bubbles.

Edited December 4, 2018 by Ookla the Fluffy Boi
Noncanon and everything for all posts of mine here. because stuffs

[MacThorstenson he/him]

Another stickquisitor smashed through the wall. Right next to the other hole. He then knelt down next to the books, to try to kindle a fire.

[Furamirionind They/Any/All]

Fura had just entered the room, and bookshelves were being torn from the walls while people smashed their way in.

No, this wasn't right.  There was something morally wrong with destroying books and bookshelves.  Fura raced towards the door and shouted at the stickquisitors still outside, "There is a door over here! no need to smash your way in, this way is much easier!!!"

Then a stickquisitor grabbed Fura's shoulder and tossed him to the side.  Mid air, Fura saw someone rushing towards him from inside the room. As Fura lost his grasp on the door, it slammed shut, and there was a loud BANG as something hit the door.  The stickquisitor opened the door to find one Le Sigh right there.

[Silva]

Quote

Now we have a plot hole. There's something here preventing violence, remember?

 

[MacThorstenson he/him]

Quote

You were the ones who used violence and desecrated the corpses of our dead brethren.

 

[+ElephantEarwax he/him]

I AM GROOT. 

Groot starts to grow at the celieng of the room, supporting it as he weakens the walls.

[Gancho Libre he/him]

George ran around in circles, barking excitedly.

[Silva]

Oh no. thought Silva, what have I done?

Quote

That wasn't me. I brought one of your brethren into existence.

 

[Le Sigh]

Le Sigh just stared in complete and utter confusion as the world went to hell. A bunch of people waving around wooden dowels, burning books and screaming filth. It was all too much.

Suddenly, the warrior let out a scream of agony as his Awkwardblade turned into a dowel. "VOIDY! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" There was a giant explosion of Booklight, and soon the rest of them would see the Awkward-plated warrior lying in tears, all of his Surgebinding (OOC: Would it be Bookbinding?) abilities gone.

"M-my spren... gone!" he weeped. "V-voidy...!"

[Snipexe he/him]

Edited for Le Sigh

Edited December 4, 2018 by Ookla the Skeptical