Trans Hangout Thread

[Hmmm lies she/her]

4 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

"Anyway, I honestly dealt with this by simply never using bathrooms at school. Even now, I don't really like to."

That's not good. Did they have gender-neutral ones?

They do, but to clarify, the reason that I don't go to the bathroom isn't because I'm worried about not passing or anything, but because I just hate school bathrooms.

5 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

...may I ask why you've said this a few times? Is it just one of those disclaimers that u like to put?

I mean my parents handled a lot of it, so I just don't really know exactly what was going on behind the scenes.

6 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

Ah, thx u

tbh i didnt even know informed consent was a thing until recently; i thought i had to, like, get diagnosed from the DSM-5 or WPATH or whatever and get a letter from a therapist person and stuff before getting hrt. informed consent is great.

Yeah, it's pretty great.

[Akimikoisthecutest]

1 hour ago, Usseewa said:

especially since i started using the women's restroom.

Holy cow, you're brave. I will likely never pass, and so I just won't use public restrooms

[Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾]

3 minutes ago, Akimikoisthecutest said:

Holy cow, you're brave. I will likely never pass, and so I just won't use public restrooms

I don't rlly think u needa pass, but idk

also never say never

maybe not with that mindset 

[Akimikoisthecutest]

Just now, Usseewa said:

I don't rlly think u needa pass, but idk

also never say never

maybe not with that mindset 

I really want to pass, but I don't think it's going to be possible. It's really nice that you feel comfortable using the woman's bathrooms.

[Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾]

Just now, Akimikoisthecutest said:

I really want to pass, but I don't think it's going to be possible. It's really nice that you feel comfortable using the woman's bathrooms.

i don't feel comfortable in either bathroom tbh.

have u tried more fem clothing? even if not overt

[Akimikoisthecutest]

1 minute ago, Usseewa said:

have u tried more fem clothing? even if not overt

I can't. I can't get any without my parents knowing. They're pretty much helicopter parents

[Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾]

1 minute ago, Akimikoisthecutest said:

I can't. I can't get any without my parents knowing. They're pretty much helicopter parents

come out maybe

or dont they think ur genderfluid?

 

[Akimikoisthecutest]

12 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

or dont they think ur genderfluid?

 

Yeah they do

[Honors Spectral Image She/her]

32 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

I don't rlly think u needa pass, but idk

also never say never

maybe not with that mindset 

Ha, u obviously don’t live in the south, if I went in to the women’s restroom looking like how I do rn, I would come out beat up and with a lawsuit filed against me

[Akimikoisthecutest]

4 minutes ago, Honors Ghost said:

Ha, u obviously don’t live in the south, if I went in to the women’s restroom looking like how I do rn, I would come out beat up and with a lawsuit filed against me

Real.

[Aeoryi she/her]

2 hours ago, Usseewa said:

like, should i try voice training? i probably should.

I can give you resources to help you if you'd like. 

It often takes quite a long time to perfect voice training stuff and it also takes a lot of practice, often times going "full time" with your chosen voice

2 hours ago, Usseewa said:

tbh i didnt even know informed consent was a thing until recently; i thought i had to, like, get diagnosed from the DSM-5 or WPATH or whatever and get a letter from a therapist person and stuff before getting hrt. informed consent is great.

Often times these clinics do the diagnosis part for you (or something like that) just to simplify the process

49 minutes ago, Akimikoisthecutest said:

I really want to pass, but I don't think it's going to be possible. It's really nice that you feel comfortable using the woman's bathrooms.

47 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

i don't feel comfortable in either bathroom tbh.

have u tried more fem clothing? even if not overt

Tbh I kinda treat public washrooms as somewhat similar to like, a long car ride. Just assume they won't be available and plan to never need them. That's what I do. 

[Aeoryi she/her]

16 hours ago, Usseewa said:

dont think ur a loser for that

tbh i feel like, irl, the binary pronouns he/him or she/her dont really sound all that well, maybe just cuz i dont feel like i pass. I mean, i use she/they to the ppl i came out to

I have been using any pronouns but they pronouns fit much better internally even though she/her pronouns fit better externally. 

16 hours ago, Usseewa said:

ye, it's much easier online. sometimes i wish i had just listened to my desire and used she/her in the past few years when i really wanted to. i always ended up using no pronouns/ they/them. tho ppl ofc used he/him sigh...

I started using it as a joke and never changed it back 

16 hours ago, Usseewa said:

oh

i shave upwards but only cuz i read to lol

but apparently downwards is better?

 

i think ur supposed to put stuff on after or it gets itchy or irritated or uncomfortable or something. it only takes a few min...tho legs are big lol

I tried upwards last night and it worked much better ty

16 hours ago, Usseewa said:

u know i used to take pride in being tall (or at least tall-ish) for some reason - maybe because i was taught it was cool - but now i hate it. like most women are shorter than me, and by quite  bit sometimes. and when i walk past them, i feel almost disgusting. maybenot that, but i wanna hunch down and, like, lose a foot (of height). Well, idk if that much but u get it. And hunching doesn't even help that much.well, actually it does. i naturally hunch and ive been told its bad for me but like everything else i still do it cuz, well, its not affecting me now

I have a moderate amount of pride about my height and weight being relatively average if not on the shorter end for guys yet still not being taller than tall girls

But realistically doesn't matter

 

[Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾]

1 hour ago, Akimikoisthecutest said:

Yeah they do

Then wouldn't that make it easier? Because, like, you could use that as a reason for getting some fem clothes?

47 minutes ago, Honors Ghost said:

Ha, u obviously don’t live in the south, if I went in to the women’s restroom looking like how I do rn, I would come out beat up and with a lawsuit filed against me

Ok, I would probably get weird looks but currently I look kinda like a woman. But also i've only encoutnered one person somehwaat so idk.

33 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

Tbh I kinda treat public washrooms as somewhat similar to like, a long car ride. Just assume they won't be available and plan to never need them. That's what I do.

That don't seem too healthy. i still use 'em. gender-neutral ones are amazing tho, even just cuz they're bigger (relatively) and private. when i used the men's restroom, i basiclaly try to get it done with and kinda hope i dont encounter anyone. like if i see someone go in, i often wait.

Spoiler

i also never use urinals, and they only have like 1 or 2 stalls so ya.

 

21 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

I tried upwards last night and it worked much better ty

yw :3

 

21 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

I started using it as a joke and never changed it back 

i was too scared to, i think

 

41 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

I can give you resources to help you if you'd like.

Oui, merci

[Aeoryi she/her]

1 minute ago, Usseewa said:

That don't seem too healthy. i still use 'em. gender-neutral ones are amazing tho, even just cuz they're bigger (relatively) and private. when i used the men's restroom, i basiclaly try to get it done with and kinda hope i dont encounter anyone. like if i see someone go in, i often wait.

It's not amazing but like at the end of the day those places are disgusting and relying on them is an icky idea

Spoiler

I also never use urinals

4 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

was too scared to, i think

I wasn't really because I kinda just knew that it was fake almost and that it meant nothing 

 

5 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

Oui, merci

FairyPrincessLucy has some good voice tutorials if you want to start there. I can give more stuff if needed

[Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾]

6 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

It's not amazing but like at the end of the day those places are disgusting and relying on them is an icky idea

I hate the ones where my shoes stick to the floor....

The ones where the seats are horrid...

Or the stalls are so cramped and the door opens inward...

And...the gaps in the stall doors...like wth. I went to the women's restroom and they have, like, no gap between the door and stall wall, but in men's they have like an inch or two. At minimum.

Spoiler

 I actually used urinals... once, maybe twice? I think. In my life. But i've never used them, they suckkkk

 

6 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

I wasn't really because I kinda just knew that it was fake almost and that it meant nothing

i felt like i would be tricking ppl and... being a creep maybe.

Spoiler

or, like, catfishing maybe.

so i just didnt specify my pronouns most of the time. pronouns are kinda weird and i didnt give them much thought cuz i didnt want to.

6 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

FairyPrincessLucy has some good voice tutorials if you want to start there. I can give more stuff if needed

uh, anyone else?

[Aeoryi she/her]

21 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

felt like i would be tricking ppl and... being a creep maybe

I've never thought of it that way tbh. Yes, it might've been deceiving people but it's not to anyone's benefit in that situation and it really doesn't make a big difference.

22 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

so i just didnt specify my pronouns most of the time. pronouns are kinda weird and i didnt give them much thought cuz i didnt want to.

I never correct people when it comes to my pronouns it's simply not worth my time

23 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

uh, anyone else?

https://buymeacoffee.com/alyssavt/how-i-start-voice-training-start-here

This is a well respected guide for voice training. 

[Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾]

5 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

https://buymeacoffee.com/alyssavt/how-i-start-voice-training-start-here

This is a well respected guide for voice training. 

thx, ill chekc it out

5 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

I've never thought of it that way tbh. Yes, it might've been deceiving people but it's not to anyone's benefit in that situation and it really doesn't make a big difference.

true, I suppose 

6 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

I never correct people when it comes to my pronouns it's simply not worth my time

sometimes i used to online, i think. just to tell tehm to use they/them or whatever.

most times i dont. cuz..like.. when they used he/him i wanted to correct them and be like "don't assume ppl's pronouns/genders!" but..at the time i was also going by he/him, at least irl, so technically they were right, so it would've been odd. (also i didnt tell anyone my pronouns but most assumed he/him unfortunately.)

[Aeoryi she/her]

14 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

true, I suppose 

Like do you think I've been lying to you or like, betraying you or someone by using she/her pronouns

15 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

sometimes i used to online, i think. just to tell tehm to use they/them or whatever.

most times i dont. cuz..like.. when they used he/him i wanted to correct them and be like "don't assume ppl's pronouns/genders!" but..at the time i was also going by he/him, at least irl, so technically they were right, so it would've been odd. (also i didnt tell anyone my pronouns but most assumed he/him unfortunately.)

I've gotten to the point where if someone uses he for me I won't even be able to tell if it's referring to me, therefore I don't really encounter situations where I correct others

But irl I have a handy dandy pronoun pin which helps sometimes it's not like I'm openly trans tho

[Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾]

8 minutes ago, Aeoryi said:

Like do you think I've been lying to you or like, betraying you or someone by using she/her pronouns

I mean, no, ofc not. But ur also trans. Idk lol. I was in the mindset i was a cisman, so saying i was a woman felt/would be like lying.

Edit: ig i wasn't aware of the concept of exploring ur identity, perhaps. or that it was okay to? or something i'd actually do? i've always been like, yep...i'm just a cishet (tho i didn't know that term, so it was just, like, not queer.) Like, yep im not queer so why would i explore my gender identity or why would i do queer stuff? cuz im not?

i still thought i might be gay a few times

i also didnt rlly know the concept of being trans, or  at least not rlly, until pretty recently.

Edited February 20 by Usseewa

[Aeoryi she/her]

55 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

mean, no, ofc not. But ur also trans. Idk lol. I was in the mindset i was a cisman, so saying i was a woman felt/would be like lying.

I used she/her pronouns online for three years before being trans. Does that mean that I lied to everyone I knew during that time?

56 minutes ago, Usseewa said:

Edit: ig i wasn't aware of the concept of exploring ur identity, perhaps. or that it was okay to? or something i'd actually do? i've always been like, yep...i'm just a cishet (tho i didn't know that term, so it was just, like, not queer.) Like, yep im not queer so why would i explore my gender identity or why would i do queer stuff? cuz im not?

i still thought i might be gay a few times

i also didnt rlly know the concept of being trans, or  at least not rlly, until pretty recently.

Despite knowing that trans people existed and having been around them for a while I never actually considered that I could be trans. I was just a cis guy who happened to be female online and I presumed it was normal 

[Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾]

1 hour ago, Aeoryi said:

I used she/her pronouns online for three years before being trans. Does that mean that I lied to everyone I knew during that time?

sigh idk

if u went by she/her - even in ur head - or were trying it out, then no. even if you were "lying," i'd say it's fine.

idk whatvr.

i stil didnt use the pronions. missed my chance.

1 hour ago, Aeoryi said:

Despite knowing that trans people existed and having been around them for a while I never actually considered that I could be trans. I was just a cis guy who happened to be female online and I presumed it was normal 

ye idk, i was kinda the same, tho not, like, overtly female online. sometimes i tried to appear female, like tried to make ppl think i was without me saying i was, and it kinda worked a few times. or at least once or twice idk. but yeah.

 

Spoiler

is this dysphoria or just the coffee?

 

edit: srry for the late response, i saw ur post but im writing an essay

edit2: also, any tips on how to...smell better? Or different? Like, I like how it smells when a girl is near me. It smells good, cuz of whatever stuff she uses? idk it sounds weird maybe. also, not that i smell bad. i dont think i do. but, like do i use a differnt deorderant? get scented shower products? use, like, perfume or smth?

Edited February 20 by Usseewa

[Aeoryi she/her]

1 hour ago, Usseewa said:

ye idk, i was kinda the same, tho not, like, overtly female online. sometimes i tried to appear female, like tried to make ppl think i was without me saying i was, and it kinda worked a few times. or at least once or twice idk. but yeah.

For me it was just the setting of my gender marker on the websites I went to. That was it. I didn't need to bring up that I was female, it was just the way I was.

I used to think I was enby, but that kinda fell away as I realized actual enby people in real life are very much not like me

[Aeoryi she/her]

2 hours ago, Usseewa said:

edit2: also, any tips on how to...smell better? Or different? Like, I like how it smells when a girl is near me. It smells good, cuz of whatever stuff she uses? idk it sounds weird maybe. also, not that i smell bad. i dont think i do. but, like do i use a differnt deorderant? get scented shower products? use, like, perfume or smth?

get girl deodorant for some reason guy deodorant is like, wildly different 

[Aeoryi she/her]

Is it normal to get gender envy from genderswap yuri

[Hmmm lies she/her]

1 minute ago, Aeoryi said:

Is it normal to get gender envy from genderswap yuri

Totally normal. 

I also remember as an egg, I thought mtf genderswaps were super cool, but being grossed out at ftm genderswaps