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Posted
26 minutes ago, alittleinsane said:

yeah ok but sometimes anger feels more like determination and it's all warm and it smells like a vibrant shade of pink (dunno where that one came from but it's what came to mind lol), and i feel like a friggin shonen protagonist, and then spring hits me like a truck and suddenly it's less like it's keeping me warm, and more like it's burning through me and it hurts

like normally i have fun little not-so-fun hateful thoughts towards myself and they feel like they're coming from someone else because i don't feel loathing towards myself to go along with it, so i can brush them aside. and i never have bad thoughts that are in the kys/sh area. and then it's liek "surprise girlie guess what time it is??? happy birthday!!!" and suddenly i'm just so mad at myself for nothing, and so tired, and i can't trust my thoughts, and it's less of a i'm-tired-living and more of a i-shouldn't-be-living and i hate it so much ugh like i don't want these thoughts or urges they aren't fun

this concludes tedtalk

*HUGS HUGS HUGS HUGS* DONT YOU DARE STOMRING JDIEJTM

your stuck here. *tight hug* no leaving. Your perfect and safe and i belive your the bestest

34 minutes ago, Just-A-Stick said:

buuuuuutttttttttt living is annoying 

ALSO SINCE WHEN DO YOU MAKE POTTERY?!?!?!

hehe tank youuuu

uhahahaha yeah he's mentally emotionally and sometimes physically abusive... uhm he's the reason I really don't remember my childhood at all and the cause of about 80% of my panic episodes/attacks (all the worse ones) uhmmmmm he smokes/vapes and drinks and does nicotine things and always asks if I wanna join him... he made some........ comments after some of my suicide episodes... uhm I don't remember if he ever sexually hurt me (yay repressed trauma) but he might have to other people and lately he's been into selling nicotine products to underage kids at church, to name several of his offenses...

mmhe scares me

*grabs hatchet* need a murder

*hugs hugs* *pats pats* 

Posted
Just now, Hawks said:

*HUGS HUGS HUGS HUGS* DONT YOU DARE STOMRING JDIEJTM

your stuck here. *tight hug* no leaving. Your perfect and safe and i belive your the bestest

*grabs hatchet* need a murder

*hugs hugs* *pats pats* 

HAWKS. What did we say about murdering people? 🤨

Posted
1 minute ago, Hawks said:

*HUGS HUGS HUGS HUGS* DONT YOU DARE STOMRING JDIEJTM

your stuck here. *tight hug* no leaving. Your perfect and safe and i belive your the bestest

HUFGS HUFS HUGS thank youuuuUUUUUUUEUEPUEWOUFPIHNRWEDCpRCJd

Posted
Just now, Hoid Slayer said:

HAWKS. What did we say about murdering people? 🤨

OH COME ON! 🥺 one personnn

Just now, alittleinsane said:

HUFGS HUFS HUGS thank youuuuUUUUUUUEUEPUEWOUFPIHNRWEDCpRCJd

*pats pats* we w(L)ove you

Posted
18 minutes ago, Hawks said:

grabs hatchet* need a murder

*hugs hugs* *pats pats* 

hmmmmmm no i dont think that'd help anything :( 

Posted
1 minute ago, Just-A-Stick said:

hmmmmmm no i dont think that'd help anything :( 

Awwww 😟

Posted
5 hours ago, Just-A-Stick said:

I do!! I make bowls, mugs, vases... MINIATURE STUFF!!! THE SMALLER THE BETTER!!! I'VE MADE BOWLS THE SIZE OF MY FINGER TIP!! :D 

Food... I make the BEST quesidilla in the world!! I make good eggs, pancakes, crepes, soup... you name is xD

*more huggggsss*

Sure, I'd love pics!! I've been doing it for... holy crap 9 months now??!?! Thats crazy its been that long already

 

 

 

unrelated... i really really really don't wanna eat food and keep tryna tell myself I'm not hungry but its not working very well -_- 

Yay!! big brother!!! *hugs much*

you can't be worse than my biological older brother, that's for sure 🙃

Sure thing next time I have time I will post something with them

Posted
1 hour ago, Just-A-Stick said:

buuuuuutttttttttt living is annoying 

ALSO SINCE WHEN DO YOU MAKE POTTERY?!?!?!

hehe tank youuuu

uhahahaha yeah he's mentally emotionally and sometimes physically abusive... uhm he's the reason I really don't remember my childhood at all and the cause of about 80% of my panic episodes/attacks (all the worse ones) uhmmmmm he smokes/vapes and drinks and does nicotine things and always asks if I wanna join him... he made some........ comments after some of my suicide episodes... uhm I don't remember if he ever sexually hurt me (yay repressed trauma) but he might have to other people and lately he's been into selling nicotine products to underage kids at church, to name several of his offenses...

mmhe scares me

*huuuuuuuuuuuugs*

1 hour ago, alittleinsane said:

yeah ok but sometimes anger feels more like determination and it's all warm and it smells like a vibrant shade of pink (dunno where that one came from but it's what came to mind lol), and i feel like a friggin shonen protagonist, and then spring hits me like a truck and suddenly it's less like it's keeping me warm, and more like it's burning through me and it hurts

like normally i have fun little not-so-fun hateful thoughts towards myself and they feel like they're coming from someone else because i don't feel loathing towards myself to go along with it, so i can brush them aside. and i never have bad thoughts that are in the kys/sh area. and then it's liek "surprise girlie guess what time it is??? happy birthday!!!" and suddenly i'm just so mad at myself for nothing, and so tired, and i can't trust my thoughts, and it's less of a i'm-tired-living and more of a i-shouldn't-be-living and i hate it so much ugh like i don't want these thoughts or urges they aren't fun

this concludes tedtalk

I really get this…

been there a lot recently, *hugs*

Posted
3 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*squeeze*

okie soon :)

*squeeze*

On 3/6/2025 at 11:38 PM, Boftrhand said:

Good evening! I'm new and wanted to introduce myself with a story about something that happened today. 

Today I had an emotional response to something Kaladin said to Teft.

"We lift the bridge together,Teft. And we carry it."

I finally understood Bridge Four in that moment. It hit me hard and I'm not ashamed to say that I pulled my car over and I wept a little.

Years ago I left my home to make a new one in the military. What they didn't tell us is death follows you home in ways you can't know about until you're drowning in alcohol while your best friend suck starts a shotgun or your brother puts a rope around his own neck. 

I'm grown now. Retired from all that. I deliver baked goods now. Pastries and coffee. I put down alcohol. I watch my daughter play soccer. And I think about the five gaps under the bridge where my friends used to stand. And how I wasn't there for them when they decided to die. 

And I cry. 

When I'm done crying I call my friends. I'm lucky to still have three friends willing to lift this bridge with me. And I'm thankful that Sanderson has given me a framework for understanding this kind of pain. Bridge Four has a profound new meaning to me today. 

 

I'm also thankful for this platform and this forum for mental health. I've struggled with suicidal ideation for 29 years and I am still here. If anyone else is out there wanting to die, let's talk about it and see if we can't lift this bridge together. 

Thank you so much for your service, and for sharing your story.

The world needs people like you ❤️ 

Posted
22 hours ago, Kaladin Stormcursed said:

*hugs for everyone*

 

To add to the stuff we do in this thread…occasional violence!

(In a fun and loving way)

VIOLENCE YAY!
But no really, play-violence is so stress-relieving! It's fun and active and burns stress and adrenaline and fun and I MISS PLAYFIGHTINGGGGG (my ankle is still in the healing process and I have been unable to spar or playfight and I miss ittttt)

 

18 hours ago, Wittles said:

It's good for mental health to learn how to pick locks right?

Oh sure, totally! (I mean, having a puzzle to focus on, something mentally engaging that gets your brain active in a non-stressful way is legitimately good, sooo...)
I learned how to pick locks from a construction worker, when I was walking a neighbor's dog while she was away on vacation and accidentally locked myself and the dog out of her house, and there were construction guys working nearby and one of them noticed my problem and came over and not only picked the lock, but showed me how to do it too. I haven't practiced in a while tho, I really should practice.

 

9 hours ago, Just A Silvereye said:

The very last exam is scary

Like

This scary

AUGH SILVER LYNEL
VERY SCARY

9 hours ago, Bird Furious said:

EW SCARY

I HAVEN'T EVEN FOUGHT ONE YET 

I GOT TOO CLOSE ONCE WHEN I DIDNT HAVE A WEAPON AND I TELEPORTED WHEN HE CHARGED ME. I WAS SCARED. 

omg YES mE TOO! The first time I encountered one I tried to sneak around it, but they're super alert and he noticed me and lit everything on fire and I panicked and teleported like half a world away.

7 hours ago, Through The Living Glass said:

 

B) they're so much worse in totk

WHAT

NO

I haven't fought one in totk yetttttt why would you tell me thaaaaat??? noooooo they were already tough in BotW...*cries*

 

7 hours ago, Just-A-Stick said:

I do!! I make bowls, mugs, vases... MINIATURE STUFF!!! THE SMALLER THE BETTER!!! I'VE MADE BOWLS THE SIZE OF MY FINGER TIP!! :D 

Food... I make the BEST quesidilla in the world!! I make good eggs, pancakes, crepes, soup... you name is xD

TINY pottery?! That's amazing!! 

ooooooh quesadillas are delicious. I'll trade you the best brownies ever for the best quesadillas ever! 

 

3 hours ago, Just-A-Stick said:

uhahahaha yeah he's mentally emotionally and sometimes physically abusive... uhm he's the reason I really don't remember my childhood at all and the cause of about 80% of my panic episodes/attacks (all the worse ones) uhmmmmm he smokes/vapes and drinks and does nicotine things and always asks if I wanna join him... he made some........ comments after some of my suicide episodes... uhm I don't remember if he ever sexually hurt me (yay repressed trauma) but he might have to other people and lately he's been into selling nicotine products to underage kids at church, to name several of his offenses...

mmhe scares me

*hug*

 

3 hours ago, alittleinsane said:

yeah ok but sometimes anger feels more like determination and it's all warm and it smells like a vibrant shade of pink (dunno where that one came from but it's what came to mind lol), and i feel like a friggin shonen protagonist, and then spring hits me like a truck and suddenly it's less like it's keeping me warm, and more like it's burning through me and it hurts

like normally i have fun little not-so-fun hateful thoughts towards myself and they feel like they're coming from someone else because i don't feel loathing towards myself to go along with it, so i can brush them aside. and i never have bad thoughts that are in the kys/sh area. and then it's liek "surprise girlie guess what time it is??? happy birthday!!!" and suddenly i'm just so mad at myself for nothing, and so tired, and i can't trust my thoughts, and it's less of a i'm-tired-living and more of a i-shouldn't-be-living and i hate it so much ugh like i don't want these thoughts or urges they aren't fun

this concludes tedtalk

*hug*

1 hour ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

*huuuuuuuuuuuugs*

I really get this…

been there a lot recently, *hugs*

*hug* for you too.

Posted
4 hours ago, alittleinsane said:

yeah ok but sometimes anger feels more like determination and it's all warm and it smells like a vibrant shade of pink (dunno where that one came from but it's what came to mind lol), and i feel like a friggin shonen protagonist, and then spring hits me like a truck and suddenly it's less like it's keeping me warm, and more like it's burning through me and it hurts

like normally i have fun little not-so-fun hateful thoughts towards myself and they feel like they're coming from someone else because i don't feel loathing towards myself to go along with it, so i can brush them aside. and i never have bad thoughts that are in the kys/sh area. and then it's liek "surprise girlie guess what time it is??? happy birthday!!!" and suddenly i'm just so mad at myself for nothing, and so tired, and i can't trust my thoughts, and it's less of a i'm-tired-living and more of a i-shouldn't-be-living and i hate it so much ugh like i don't want these thoughts or urges they aren't fun

this concludes tedtalk

*hugs*

1 hour ago, MirkerLurker said:

VIOLENCE YAY!
But no really, play-violence is so stress-relieving! It's fun and active and burns stress and adrenaline and fun and I MISS PLAYFIGHTINGGGGG (my ankle is still in the healing process and I have been unable to spar or playfight and I miss ittttt)

You already seem to be doing this but I’m’a emphasize this anyway ‘cause it needs to be emphasized ‘cuz for some reason people (totally not me) ignore this:

DON’T USE A HURT JOINT UNTIL IT’S HEALED *coughcough*notspeakingfromexperienceayearlater

Posted
1 hour ago, MirkerLurker said:

VIOLENCE YAY!
But no really, play-violence is so stress-relieving! It's fun and active and burns stress and adrenaline and fun and I MISS PLAYFIGHTINGGGGG (my ankle is still in the healing process and I have been unable to spar or playfight and I miss ittttt)

 

Oh sure, totally! (I mean, having a puzzle to focus on, something mentally engaging that gets your brain active in a non-stressful way is legitimately good, sooo...)
I learned how to pick locks from a construction worker, when I was walking a neighbor's dog while she was away on vacation and accidentally locked myself and the dog out of her house, and there were construction guys working nearby and one of them noticed my problem and came over and not only picked the lock, but showed me how to do it too. I haven't practiced in a while tho, I really should practice.

 

AUGH SILVER LYNEL
VERY SCARY

omg YES mE TOO! The first time I encountered one I tried to sneak around it, but they're super alert and he noticed me and lit everything on fire and I panicked and teleported like half a world away.

WHAT

NO

I haven't fought one in totk yetttttt why would you tell me thaaaaat??? noooooo they were already tough in BotW...*cries*

 

TINY pottery?! That's amazing!! 

ooooooh quesadillas are delicious. I'll trade you the best brownies ever for the best quesadillas ever! 

 

*hug*

 

*hug*

*hug* for you too.

Hehe I got the stasis upgrade, tho, so hopefully I’ll live 🤞 

Posted
2 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

. . . maybe once I finish learning about black holes 

They'll still be there tmrw, I promise

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