Brightness Warrior she/her Posted December 25, 2018 Posted December 25, 2018 Not granted! Your bane is that you bleed from the ears every time you see any kind of dog. Not a dangerous amount, just enough to be uncomfortable and provoke numerous explanations. My boon is to never be bothered when I'm reading or listening to an audiobook.
AonEne he/him Posted December 25, 2018 Posted December 25, 2018 What?! Is the Nightwatcher even allowed to do that? I thought we had to grant everything, unless it's specifically something that ACTUALLY can't be granted, like sanity! And why am I getting a bane if I have no boon? Can I sue? Granted. However, I just noticed your profile picture, so the Nightwatcher delivers upon you this bane: William Afton starts hunting you down. Disregard the giant bloody anthropomorphic rabbit; he's not going to kill you at all... I wish for my previous wish, because I got GYPPED, I'm telling you. (I also wish everyone a Merry Christmas, but only the second one when I'm out of the Valley.) (By the way, @Brightness Warrior, the mods prefer if we don't double-post. You're fine because you didn't know, but in the future, there's an edit button you can use! Welcome to the Shard! ) 1
Brightness Warrior she/her Posted December 25, 2018 Posted December 25, 2018 2 hours ago, AonEne said: William Afton starts hunting you down. Disregard the giant bloody anthropomorphic rabbit; he's not going to kill you at all... Yah'no, if my buddy Nightmare actually wanted me dead, I can accept that I don't stand a chance. He is, after all, an 8-something foot demon bear with 10-inch claws and wicked teeth, not to mention the 'fear factor.' (What kind of teleportation abilities does our red-eyed voidbringer pal here possess? Who knows? Who cares?)
StormblessedSurvivor he/him Posted December 29, 2018 Posted December 29, 2018 (edited) On 12/24/2018 at 7:11 PM, AonEne said: I wish for my previous wish, because I got GYPPED, I'm telling you. (I also wish everyone a Merry Christmas, but only the second one when I'm out of the Valley.) Granted! But you can tell nobody what you know, and whenever you think of what you were told you feel an overwhelming urge to run around screaming at the top of your lungs while also square dancing. With yourself. I wish for everyone to have a positive outlook on everything. Edited December 29, 2018 by StormblessedSurvivor 1
+Hoiditthroughthegrapevine he/him Posted December 29, 2018 Posted December 29, 2018 10 hours ago, StormblessedSurvivor said: I wish for everyone to have a positive outlook on everything. The Nightwatcher shakes her head in disgust before she, with a pitying look, whispers the baneful word "granted" that hangs in the air in a luminous green puff of mist until it slowly swirls and dissipates. The next thing you know, the nightwatcher's powerful tail swings in and slaps you right across the face as she slithers back into the woods, leaving one more final luminous whispered message hanging in the air "you're welcome". You think how wondrous it is to be suddenly warmed in the chill night air by the involuntary voiding of your bowels from instinctual terror due to your recent brush with death. You also think how great it is that you'll get to drink all your solid food as smoothies as you spit out a mouthful of bloody teeth that thankfully were liberated from the prison of your jaw from the salutary impact of the nightwatcher's tail. All across the land, similar tragedies are likewise perceived as powerfully uplifting strokes of good luck. Also, with everything being looked on as positively as possible, all work towards human progress stops. All tv stations play the same episode of Dora the Explorer on infinite repeat, because, gall darn it, that's good enough. Drivers of buses no longer feel constrained to avoid hitting pedestrians, pedestrians no longer feel constrained to wear clothing, in short you have unleashed an Apocalypse of unprecedented stupidity. The critical faculty is necessary for the proper functioning of society. If people have a positive outlook on everything, irrespective of the merits of that thing, then there is no incentive to improve things. Everyone eats dirt, poops on their kitchen table, and then as they are covered in feces they join hands with their fellow doltish humans and sing twinkle twinkle little star until the cockroaches take over the world. They at least are somewhat discriminating... I wish the world really was as grand as it sounds like it is in Andy Williams version of "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year". 3
Lunamor she/her Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 First Post! Granted, but you can never receive Christmas presents. I wish to be a Truthwatcher with an unlimited amount of Stormlight. 2
Dalakaar he/him Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 21 minutes ago, Lunamor said: I wish to be a Truthwatcher with an unlimited amount of Stormlight. Granted, but the only Truth you get to Watch are daytime soap operas from the 80's/90's narrated by Mike the TV. I would like to have every Cosmere work that will ever be published or unpublished in my hands by the end of today! 3
Lunamor she/her Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted, but your hands have to grow to a ridicuous size to accomodate all of the books (and no stacking). I wish for my phone to never run out of battery. 1
Xavier Iriarte he/him Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted, but you have to actively use it 14 hours a day or else it stops working I wish i knew the exact pathway to my succes in life 1
Lunamor she/her Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted, but the pathway leads you off the edge of a cliff (there was a very valuable treasure chest at the bottom). I wish for a pencil that always stays sharp.
DrakeMarshall he/him Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted. The Nightwatcher hands you a good quality mechanical pencil, and then steals one of your shoes to make it a fair trade. I wish for an interesting book to read, with preference given to reading materials that will not alter my current degree of sanity or lack thereof. 1
supersmith Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted. The book is a cliffhanger with no chance of a sequel. i wish for the ability to always have a enough money for whatever I want.
Xavier Iriarte he/him Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted, but you will have a very difficult time deciding what you want for the rest of your life. I wish to be the smartest person ever 1
Lunamor she/her Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted, but no one believes anything that you say. I wish for an unlimited supply of cheese (don’t judge me). 2
AonEne he/him Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 18 minutes ago, Lunamor said: I wish for an unlimited supply of cheese (don’t judge me). I never judge cheese. (Despite not liking it.) Granted, but you fell an unavoidable urge to scream "I WANNA TALK ABOUT CHEESE" whenever you think about romance, Studio C, or the Nightwatcher. Welcome to the Shard, by the way! I wish for a puppy. It's been too long since I wished for a puppy. 3
Lunamor she/her Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted, but it is impossible to potty train. I wish for Stormlight 4 to already be finished and published in all of its glory. 1
Atium he/him Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 8 minutes ago, Lunamor said: I wish for Stormlight 4 to already be finished and published in all of its glory. Granted, but you can't read it I wish for infinite free cake 1
Lunamor she/her Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted, but the cake has no sugar in it. I wish for wi fi that never goes down.
+Ed Venture Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted but, it only works if you post some hate talk on the Shard about SA I wish for the ability to access the Weave from D&D 5e 1
StormblessedSurvivor he/him Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Granted, but it transforms you into a level one half-orc wizard who unfortunately has an even lower Intelligence score than possible (-2) giving you a -6 Intelligence, and in the case that you somehow manage to access the Weave, the REAL demogorgon comes with a bunch of Mind Flayers and Storm Giants if you ever do more than the power of a cantrip. Also a couple tarrasques intent on killing you (I don't know, isn't there only one known of? Maybe some came from a different dimension) but the Nightwatcher feels bad for you so you can't take any damage from the tarrasques. I wish to be a level 20 human bard. 1
+Ed Venture Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Well then... did not see that coming. You thoroughly got me @StormblessedSurvivor You deserve all the up votes Question, What sub-class? Cause it matters!
StormblessedSurvivor he/him Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 Uhhh...let's go College of Glamour - from Xanathar's Guide to Everything, I think? 1
Lunamor she/her Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 2 hours ago, The Forumlurker said: Granted but, it only works if you post some hate talk on the Shard about SA Never!!! 1
+Ed Venture Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 OK then! Too bad Lunamor no high speed, never going down, perfect WiFi! Granted! You would make a wonderful Lv 20 human bard! Worldbringer perhaps??? However, your magic works only if its focus is the sharing of the deadest of memes. VIEW THE REST AT YOUR OWN RISK:
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