Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Granted, but the master is your greatest enemy who hates your guts.

I wish for A Nice Book to be enchanted so it will write creative new stories each time I open the book with unlimited pages

[Longshot97 he/him]

Granted. You are doomed to forever have people reading over your shoulder the moment you open said book.

I wish to possess biomechanical augmentations, á la The Frugal Wizard's Handbook For Surviving Medieval England.

Edited August 9, 2024 by Longshot97

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Granted, but an evil mafia group paid for them and now you are stuck repaying them for the rest of your life.

I wish to read A Nice Book in peace

[Unintelligenius he/him]

Granted. All life in the universe except your own ends to grant you eternal peace and quiet.

I wish for control over time.

[Vyzkel He/Him]

Granted, you now can choose how long a minute is.

I wish for a sandwich.

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Granted. It's the best type of sandwich in the world, a mud sandwich that is.

I wish for control over time too

[Unintelligenius he/him]

Granted. You now have all power of thyme. 

I wish for time slow down just for me, but only when I want it to.

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Time will slow, but so will you

I wish to know what thyme is

[Unintelligenius he/him]

Granted. It's an herb. You are unable to eat any herbs the rest of your life.

I wish to be able to slow everything else around me and not myself when I wish.

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Granted. Next time you ask a genie in a bottle to grant you a wish, everything around you within a 1 foot radius will slow for a minute. After that, you will slow for a minute.

I wish to know how to pronounce sliver

[Vyzkel He/Him]

Granted, you now have a lisp.

I wish to know perfect French.

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Sure, Perfect French is a pretty nice person, glad you wanted to be friends!

I wish to undo my bane.

[Vyzkel He/Him]

Granted, you now have rhotacisme instead(look it up).

I wish to give Doomslug Doomslug Doomslug her lisp back.

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Oh, I didn't even realize you had stolen my processing, why, thank you! Now I can get back to creating AI!

I wish to speak normally

[Unintelligenius he/him]

Granted. You can only say the word normally no matter what you try to say.

I wish for good luck.

[Longshot97 he/him]

51 minutes ago, Unintelligenius said:

 

Granted. You are also given bad luck. Nothing's changed.

I wish for the steel-ified skull of my mortal enemy.

[Doomslug the Arcane she/her]

Yeah sure, but before I do that, I'm changing your mortal enemy to yourself.

ALSO, I JUST SPOKE 17 WORDS THAT AREN'T NORMAL. HAH!

[Vyzkel He/Him]

You are now cursed once again with a lisp and rhotacisme.

I wish for three very loyal friends.

[Unintelligenius he/him]

Granted. They are so loyal to you that they are suspicious of the other two and they all end up assassinating each other.

I wish for a flamethrower.

[Vyzkel He/Him]

Granted, you get a guy that throws flames at you.

I wish a very friendly friend group.

[Longshot97 he/him]

Granted. You also have a very hostile enemy group. Will the Power of Friendship™ prevail?

I wish for another wish.

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

Granted. You have to redo every Fitness Gram™ Pacer Test you ever went through in school.

I wish for an apple.

[Vyzkel He/Him]

Granted, you are now not allowed in hospitals because all the doctors are afraid of you.

I wish to have an amazing endurance.

[Kansas Stormcursed he/him]

Granted; however, you must consume $1,000 of food per day.

I wish to know ALL.

[Longshot97 he/him]

Granted. Meet my dear friend Alejandro Lucia-Lorena. Guess what we call him

I wish to be able to comprehensively speak every language in existence.