Cryptic Previews

[ChocolateRob]

Well the release date is just over a month away now but we've run out of free previews and so the only solution is to honor the noble cryptics and create our own.

 

I've been posting a few of my own in the comments under the 'official' previews on Tor.com but I've also noticed a few being added on the chatbox here over the last few days. These poor orphaned snippets of dubious canonicity need an official home and here it shall be.

 

Warning - Outrageously suspect spoilers lie within

 

----------------------------------

 

How about that assassination attempt with the spandagger fabrial in chapter 26, there Kaladin was inspecting knives in the armory when one of them leapt off the rack straight for his eye. Luckily he was saved by a nearby (hidden) King's Wit who managed to steel push it off course, the assassin hidden at the back of the room getting yanked into the open by his conjoined weapon.

 

--------

 

Also try not to get too attached to Teft cause that bit where he dies at the end is heartbreaking -

 

"Teft!" Jasnah screamed, holding his bloody body in her arms "Why?"
He didn't respond. He just stared into the air, eyes glazed over, his spirit gone. She shivered, pulling him close as his body cooled.
"You can't die, you can't. Please."
It was no use. Teft was dead. Really dead. As dead as a corpse with burnt out eyes. So very, very dead.
"But you had so much more to teach me about the Radiants"
She felt at his pulse, just in case. There was nothing.
"Oh cruel world" she said sobbing.
She poked him in the ribs, it could have been a bad joke. But there was no reaction, seeing as how Teft was completely and utterly dead.

[Lorna]

Well the release date is just over a month away now but we've run out of free previews and so the only solution is to honor the noble cryptics and create our own.

 

I've been posting a few of my own in the comments under the 'official' previews on Tor.com but I've also noticed a few being added on the chatbox here over the last few days. These poor orphaned snippets of dubious canonicity need an official home and here it shall be.

 

Warning - Outrageously suspect spoilers lie within

 

----------------------------------

 

How about that assassination attempt with the spandagger fabrial in chapter 26, there Kaladin was inspecting knives in the armory when one of them leapt off the rack straight for his eye. Luckily he was saved by a nearby (hidden) King's Wit who managed to steel push it off course, the assassin hidden at the back of the room getting yanked into the open by his conjoined weapon.

 

--------

 

Also try not to get too attached to Teft cause that bit where he dies at the end is heartbreaking -

 

"Teft!" Jasnah screamed, holding his bloody body in her arms "Why?"

He didn't respond. He just stared into the air, eyes glazed over, his spirit gone. She shivered, pulling him close as his body cooled.

"You can't die, you can't. Please."

It was no use. Teft was dead. Really dead. As dead as a corpse with burnt out eyes. So very, very dead.

"But you had so much more to teach me about the Radiants"

She felt at his pulse, just in case. There was nothing.

"Oh cruel world" she said sobbing.

She poked him in the ribs, it could have been a bad joke. But there was no reaction, seeing as how Teft was completely and utterly dead.

 

He he! outrageously suspect indeed.

[Aleksiel]

Sorry, but this Jasnah here is nothing like the Jasnah in WoK. Screaming? Sobbing? Pulling a dead body of someone she barely knows closer? Pocking? Come on.

Edit: Oh, I thought you were serious. 

Edited February 5, 2014 by Aleksiel

[Lorna]

Could we get some more of these? I find them ridiculously entertaining.

[+eveorjoy]

Adolin ran into his family's compound. It couldn’t be true. Shallan had only been here one day and she was already kissing someone else. This had to be fastest one of his relationships had fallen apart.
 
Well there was Liss, but that had only lasted ten minutes.
 
Rumors flew claiming Renarin had stolen her. Some people even seemed to prefer the pairing, calling them Shallarin.  Shippers were an odd bunch indeed. And Shadolin sounded better.
 
As he turned down the hall to Renarin’s sleeping quarters, he saw his brother standing outside his room alone. “How could you do this to me?”
 
Renarin blinked. “Do what?”
 
“I only just met her today.”
 
“What are you talking about?”
 
“I know about you and my Brightlady.”
 
Renarin blushed. “Feather is your Brightlady? What about Shallan?”
 
Feather?  “Who is Feather?”
 
Renarin’s blush deepened. “Never mind. What about Shallan?”
 
“I heard she ran off here to your room with you.”
 
Renarin shrugged. “I haven’t even met the girl. Have you lost another one already?”
 
Adolin groaned. “Well if she didn’t come here with you then where is she?”
 
A giggle came from behind Renarin’s door. The brothers looked at each other.
 
“After you,” Adolin said.
 
Renarin opened the door and Shallan was in the room with a one armed Herdazian. The two grinned sheepishly. Shallah’s free hand partly covered her mouth, while her safe hand scandalously touched his stump of a shoulder.
 
“Sorry, Gancho,” the Herdazian said, “But a one armed Herdazian is twice as good a kisser as a two armed, thin lipped Alethi.”
 
“Truth!” Pattern said as he rolled over Shallan’s head.

Edited February 16, 2014 by eveorjoy

[Scriptorian]

"Teft!" Jasnah screamed, holding his bloody body in her arms "Why?"

He didn't respond. He just stared into the air, eyes glazed over, his spirit gone. She shivered, pulling him close as his body cooled.

"You can't die, you can't. Please."

It was no use. Teft was dead. Really dead. As dead as a corpse with burnt out eyes. So very, very dead.

"But you had so much more to teach me about the Radiants"

She felt at his pulse, just in case. There was nothing.

"Oh cruel world" she said sobbing.

She poked him in the ribs, it could have been a bad joke. But there was no reaction, seeing as how Teft was completely and utterly dead.

So much face palm. But I up-vote you anyway. 

 

For those unfortunate souls who don't know, this is almost a direct quote from Alcatraz. By the way, Bastille dies.

[Delightful]

Adolin ran into his family compound. It couldn’t be true. Shallan had only been here one day and she was already kissing someone else. This had to be fastest one of his relationships had fallen apart.

 

Well there was Liss, but that had only lasted ten minutes.

 

Rumors flew claiming Renarin had stolen her. Some people even seemed to prefer the pairing, calling them Shallarin.  Shippers were an odd bunch indeed. And Shadolin sounded better.

 

As he turned down the hall to Renarin’s sleeping quarters, he saw his brother standing outside his room alone. “How could you do this to me?”

 

Renarin blinked. “Do what?”

 

“I only just met her today.”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“I know about you and my Brightlady?”

 

Renarin blushed. “Feather is your Brightlady? What about Shallan?”

 

Feather?  “Who is Feather?”

 

Renarin’s blush deepened. “Never mind. What about Shallan?”

 

“I heard she ran off here to your room with you.”

 

Renarin shrugged. “I haven’t even met the girl. Have you lost another one already?”

 

Adolin groaned. “Well if she didn’t come here with you then where is she?”

 

A giggle came from behind Renarin’s door. The brothers looked at each other.

 

“After you,” Adolin said.

 

Renarin opened the door and Shallan was in the room with a one armed Herdazian. The two grinned sheepishly. Shallah’s free hand partly covered her mouth, while her safe hand scandalously touched his stump of a shoulder.

 

“Sorry, Gancho,” the Herdazian said, “But a one armed Herdazian is twice as good a kisser as a two armed, thin lipped Alethi.”

 

“Truth!” Pattern said as he rolled over Shallan’s head.

Brilliant

Awww, Renarin blushed at mention of Feather.....what shall we call this ship? Featherin?

 

Wait, what? Liss? Jasnah's assassin?

Edited February 3, 2014 by Delightful

[+eveorjoy]

Well Adolin gets around, and it was only for ten minutes.(Just kidding. I love Adolin, even if he gives the stinkeye to Kaladin.)

 

I hope others do more of these.

Edited February 3, 2014 by eveorjoy

[ChocolateRob]

Well I didn't want to ruin it but there was that chapter where Kaladin is invited to one of the Lighteye feasts and he invites Syl as his official date.

 

Sure it was awkward that he asked for a place to be set for her on the men's table next to him even though he stated that there was not to be any food served there (even though Syl is her usual size for this first part). After some time of having half a conversation with someone who isn't there (as it seems to the other guests) he gets up and asks Syl to dance

 

A sudden quiet hangs in the air as everyone sees a madman dancing around in circles on his own, but every few moments there are random gasps of surprise as different people momentarily see a glowing young woman mirroring his every move. Those who see her don't want to speak of it and just keep watching while those who don't see are mystified at the strange reactions of those around them.

 

----------

 

It's a very heartwarming chapter as Kaladin truly expresses his thanks to the one who kept his hope alive in his darkest days, but I've given away far too much now.

[Lorna]

I wish I could up-vote more than once. My kids wonder what all my laughing and awww-ing is about.

 

These are great for helping pass the time 'till March.

 

@ everjoy

That bit about Feather was golden.

[Scriptorian]

I created these from mad libs. They turned out rather well.

 

"Taravangian has just written a book called "The Ward in the Secret Soulcaster ." The main character in this Dying story is a (an) Lying girl named Shallan who can't decide between a career in Scholars or marriage to Bald boy who promised her a Storming Shardblade . The author has many conflicts to resolve, but finds that a Soulcast marriage is the answer. This book is written Suddenly and filled with Alethi language. It proves the old saying: "A woman's place is in the Highstorm ."

 

"Shallan and her ex-husband Kabsal, were seen last night at the Twenty-Three Club holding Ardents. Could it be reconciliation? The international heartthrow, Kaladin, and the glamorous top model, Jasnah, are expecting their first baby in November. Jasnah is denying stork rumors, but yesterday she was seen buying a maternity Soulcaster."

[Stoneward]

My uncle's cousin's neighbor's friend works at a certain publishing house (not telling you which one!) and they passed along this little tidbit. Warning, this might contain some pretty significant spoilers!
 

---

Gentle raindrops rolled down Szeth's head and pooled with the blood expanding from his shoulder and side.
 
"Kaladin," he said, softly, wheezing. "I... I never told you."
 
Kaladin rose from his crouch, the last of his Stormlight fading, and extended his spear towards the dying Shin's throat.
 
"I don't want to hear it." Kaladin said. "Not after what you did to my friends. To my own father!"
 
"But Kaladin... I" Szeth's chest heaved and then stilled. A whisper. "I... am your father."
 
A thin shardblade, simple, beautiful, clattered to the stones.
 
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"
 
Gentle raindrops rolled down Kaladin's upturned face and pooled with blood.

Edited February 4, 2014 by Stoneward

[Elbereth]

That is hilarious!!

How about when Kaladin is offered a Shardblade and refuses it again?

I only saw that little bit, so I'm not sure, but I think he got it from dueling Amaram. I'm guessing that Kaladin gives it to Teft or Rock.

[ChocolateRob]

As we will be getting snippets Emailed to us from Tor.com every day starting Tuesday It seem like the perfect opportunity to get a bit... creative... in expanding them into full 'spoilers'.

 

Who can give the best show of deliberately subverting a snippet with an imaginative twist?

 

On your marks...

 

Get set...

 

EDIT

 

GO!

Edited February 13, 2014 by ChocolateRob

[Scriptorian]

"What am I?" Shallan whispered. "I....am a SHARDBEARER!"

The tenth beat of her heart sounded and the massive silver blade sprang into existence.

"WOO-HOO!" She cried, lunging forward as she swung the shardblade downward, chopping the table in half and causing poor Jasnah to fall backward in her chair from shock.

"Let's go eat some PEOPLE!" Shallan ran from the room, waving both her arms above her head, shardblade and all.

[Scriptorian]

"I flinched, when I should have scurried!"

Collected on the third day of the week Palah of the month Shash of the year 1171, twenty-five seconds before death. Subject was an aged meerkat. Sample highly significant.

[Everstorm]

Major spoilers guys, I got this chapter from Brandons own computer while he was out buying eggs. Read on at your own risk.

************************

"What is this man doing here?" Amaram asked, his voice trembling, his face red with emotion.

"Kaladin? You are looking at the captain of my personal guard."

Dalinar looked from one man to the other as they stood silently, regarding each other. One shaking like a tree in a high storm, the other unmoving as the Horneater peaks.

"Captain? A _dark eyes_?" Yelped Amaram.

Dalinar walked towards Kaladin, placing a hand on his shoulder. "I owe him a life debt. Of all the people in the world I would have expected at least you to be able to look beyond the color of his eyes. And if you must know, this man is worth 10, nay a 100 light eyed soldiers in combat."

"I do, oh god, I do. "Amaram said, his head bowed, as he walked towards Kaladin.

"How dare you?" Kaldin hissed, his face livid with rage. The whole room seemed to grow darker as Kaladin spoke, his eyes blazing.

Amaram approached. "Kaladin, I cannot begin to express how sorry I am for everything I've done to you. "

"Sorry? You think a storming sorry will do the trick? After what you did to me? After you killed my friends? My brother?"

"Captain! You overreach your station!" Dalinar exclaimed. "Brightlord Amaram is an honorable man and a guest. How dare you speak to him like that?"

"No Dalinar, let him speak. He has every right. Not a day goes by when I do not regret my actions. If only I had not been blinded thus." Aramam took a step towards Kaladin now barely standing an arm's length away. " If only I had been as courageous as you, to see beyond the color of his eyes." Amaram leaned forward, "To follow my heart instead of my eyes" and kissed him.

Syl zipped around them as they locked lips. "The words! The words, Kaladin, you must say them!"

Kaladin looked shell shocked as they broke apart and yet the words leapt unbidden into his mouth. "Amaram," he said, "Will you be my waifu?"

**********************

Sorry for the terrible formatting. Took me half an hour to type on my phone.

Edited February 8, 2014 by Darkeye

[ChocolateRob]

"Thirty-eight days," Renarin read. "The end of all nations"

"Well it's certainly a bold statement father but I doubt you'll convince the rest of Roshar to join the Euro"

 

-----

 

She felt and heard the storm approach. The ground shook, the air roared. Bits of leaves swept across her in a chill gust, like scouts before an oncoming army that charged behind, the howling wind its battle cry.

"My God" Shallan whispered "We should never have offered to host the BieberLlama festival, there are too few of us to hold back the crowds"

[Heir of the Void]

"Thirty-eight days," Renarin read. "The end of all nations"

 

He brought his fist down on the table, his shardplate making a deep impression in the wood. He had taken to wearing it whenever he coud, to make up for his natural weakness. Only 38 days before every nation left the  council?

 

Aunt Navanni's new "FabrilCom" game needed some work.

[Delightful]

My Szeth/Kaladin fight prediction in the form of a Frozen song. (Please don't ask what I should have been doing instead )

 

 

A highstorm approaches on the winds tonight,

Not an axehound to be seen,

A world of isolation,

Gotta stay inside, feel the fear.

Windspren play like the crashing storm outside

Szeth’s coming, now I can’t hide.

 

Can’t let them in

Can’t let them see

Or they’ll somehow take it all from me,

Conceal, don’t breathe

Don’t let it show,

Well now they know,
 

 

Let it glow

Let it glow

Can’t hold it in anymore

Let it glow,

Let it glow,

Turn away and Lash the door,

I don’t care if they know I can,

I must save Dalinar,

The storm always Invested me anyway.

 

It’s funny how perspective,

Like a man running up the wall,

Changes your priorities

When you  know he can’t fall,

It’s time to show what I can do,

To break the limits and fight through,

I can’t hold back, I have to win,

To defend!

 

Let it glow

Let it glow

Like part of stormlight itself,

Let it glow

Let it glow

I can’t fear no more,

Hear I run

Like a Knight Radiant,

I must save Dalinar

The storm always Invested me anyway

 

My power rushes through my skin into the air

My, stormlight creating stickiness everywhere,

And when I hold my spear everything comes clear

I must defeat Szeth, he threatens

Everything I hold dear!

 

Let it glow!

Let it glow!

I can fly from the Origin of Storms,

Let it glow!

Let it glow!

My secret is now gone,

Here I fight

As the storm passes,

The storm always Invested me anyway

 

 

 

[Heir of the Void]

"He thinks you're a god. You shouldn't encourage him." Teft said.

 

"Why not? I am a god." Kaladin cackled, "Or I will be soon enough! Leyten, is everything in position?"

 

"Yes, sir, the device is operating properly."

 

"Good. The highstorm approaches, and soon, I'll show them! I'll show them all!"

 

"How could you do this, Kaladin?" Jasneth gasped, bursting into the Inner Scantum of Bridge Four. "I thought you loved me!"

 

"We should have seen." Dalinar said. "His first love was always honor."

 

"The Highstorm is in position!" Sigzil shouted.

 

"Good! Rock, Raise the lighting rod!"

"This thing, I will do for you." The Horneater said, cranking the massive, emerald-tipped conductor into position.

 

Then the heart of the highstorm passed overhead, and a single bolt of lightning lanced downwards, splitting the heavens as all the Stormlight of the tempest was drawn down out of the sky.

 

"Kaladin?" Syl said, prying herself off of the cold metal slab. "What happened.”?

"HAHAHAH! I HAVE CREACTED LIFE!"

 

 

 

As you can see, a lot happened in today's preview from Tor, and a lot of it is pretty weird.

[TheArcanist]

In reference to that version of the Kaladin vs. Szeth fight as "Let it Go" it probably would've been better as this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgHrCIJXL2M&list=PL-XZ3I0ADX14Gh2jOkiNbuJLvt66oNyEv

 

Makes more sense to me.