ostrichofevil

alleyverse
Dark Alley - Non-Hemalurgic Research Division

88 posts in this topic

It has come to my attention that the other Denizens' and my creation, sale, and use of Hemalurgic cookies has upset many people, including the Anti-Bakery, Light Alley, and Mediocrely Lit Alleys. Also, I believe that we (the Dark Alley) need to broaden our horizons. For those reasons, I am starting the Non-Hemalurgic Research Division (NHRD) of the Dark Alley, which will specialize in, well, non-Hemalurgic Research. We will no longer just bake cookies; we will rise up and bake Metalmind Muffins, Stormlight Soufflé, and other tasty Investiture delights!

 

Since this is a sub-group of the Dark Alley, all NHRD members must be Dark Alley members. (Which means that if you want to join, ask in the main DA thread.) However, non Dark Alley members may also help out with our Research, and need not fear spontaneous use of Cookies. In fact, we will limit ourselves to ethical Research in this thread, so morality advocates are welcome.

 

Member List:

Ostrichofevil - Maleril Ostrir Chalev Tekel - Head Non-Metallic/non-Hemalurgic Researcher, and lowly Denizen of the Dark Alley.

Morzathoth - Biochroma Specialist

Screwloose - Research Assistant

IrulelikeSTIK - Research Assistant

Kipper - Resident Forger

Glossary:

Feruchemical Unit (FU) - The NHRD's unit of Feruchemical charge.  One FU is the amount of Feruchemy needed to double a quality for one minute.

 

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Bakery

 

Here you can find information on our bakery. You may order items from the menu on this thread. We also take custom orders, which will probably be added to the menu.

 

Menu:

Metalmind Muffins - (57.34 + 24i) per 2400

Stormlight Souffle -10.95

BioChromatic Breath-mint- 1.8 cents per Breath-mint

BioChromatic Brioche - 40.25

Allomantic Aioli - 0x3.243F6 per pound

Metalmind Mints - 1.23 per .2 FU mint

Compounding Cake - 423.45

Investiture Ice Cream - 2.37 + 2.57i for one scoop.

Sygaldry Sorbet - Five talents

Sympathy Soup - Twelve talents

Forgery Frappe - Four pounds of soulstone

True Source Tiramisu - 8.12

Payment Methods:

  • Cash
  • Filled Metalminds
  • Credit/Debit
  • Investiture
  • Shardblades
  • Bitcoin
  • Your Eternal Soul
  • Upvotes

Note that upvotes are the preferred method of payment.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Note: This sub-group is approved by Voidus, effective leader of the Dark Alley, and is an official division of the Alley.

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As Eldritch Horror of Research of general Investiture I figure this is where I belong.

 

 

Lets begin with Biochroma! Also if anyone has any interests in the magic on Sel (which I really dont) that would be great.

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Oh, other investiture delights, eh? Wonderful! I'll have a double feruchemy/stormlight cake, please! And a BioChromatic Breathmint on the side, please!

Edited by ChullRider
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Oh, other investiture delights, eh? Wonderful! I'll have a double feruchemy/stormlight cake, please! And a BioChromatic Breathmint on the side, please!

 

Coming right up.  In your cake, would you like Chocolate (Copper), Vanilla (Steel), or another flavor?  And how many Breaths would you like in your Breathmint?

 

Also, would you like to join as a Research Helper?

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I'm going to join this as the resident Forger.

I'll also share my favorite recipe for BioChromatic Brioche.

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Non-Hemalurgic research? I'm not sure I quite understand, but I'll trust you lot to carry on.

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I'm going to join this as the resident Forger.

I'll also share my favorite recipe for BioChromatic Brioche.

You have been added.

 

Non-Hemalurgic research? I'm not sure I quite understand, but I'll trust you lot to carry on.

 

Will a taste of Allomantic Aioli help?

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Coming right up.  In your cake, would you like Chocolate (Copper), Vanilla (Steel), or another flavor?  And how many Breaths would you like in your Breathmint?

 

Also, would you like to join as a Research Helper?

Hmm.... Let's see. Copper seems good, and i'd like about 500 breaths in that Breathmint, please.

 

And as for the Research Helper offer, I'll have to consider that.

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Hmm.... Let's see. Copper seems good, and i'd like about 500 breaths in that Breathmint, please.

 

Let's see…  Your total is $27.75.  We have several payment options including:

  • Cash
  • Filled Metalminds
  • Credit/Debit
  • Investiture
  • Shardblades
  • Bitcoin
  • Your Eternal Soul
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I'm rather curious how many Shardblades are required for a $27.75 purchase :P

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Will a taste of Allomantic Aioli help?

 

Not if there aren't any spikes in it. But I appreciate the effort. In the mean time I'm gonna go spike some random people to see if you can spike hiccups.

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Let's see…  Your total is $27.75.  We have several payment options including:

  • Cash
  • Filled Metalminds
  • Credit/Debit
  • Investiture
  • Shardblades
  • Bitcoin
  • Your Eternal Soul

 

Hmm... Can I pay in upvotes?

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I'm rather curious how many Shardblades are required for a $27.75 purchase :P

Four and a half.  On the other hand, it costs 23 Shardblades to make a $14.81 purchase.

 

Hmm... Can I pay in upvotes?

You may.

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Can I have several hundred dozen Metalmind Muffins? I'm starting to run low on food.

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Can I have several hundred dozen Metalmind Muffins? I'm starting to run low on food.

 

Sure!  That'll be $57.34 + 24i.  Payment methods are listed above, and upvotes are also an accepted payment method.

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Will there be any Metalmind Mints? With the slow release of the investiture in a metalmind rather than the sudden burst of taste that one would get from a muffin?

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Man.

I must not have been eating the right muffins.

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Well metalminds do empty quicker than they fill up :P

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Well, CadmiumMuffins just leave you hungry for more.

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Also, I feel as though people often want something more with their food, so a StormlightSalad would do wonders for the business.

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That would be good; nobody really likes salad. Everyone's happy to eat salad as long as it doesn't taste like salad. I've never heard anyone say, "I love eating lettuce!" Same goes for fish. We should make FeruFish

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FeruFish and MetalMeat? Feruchemy gets all the best food at the moment :P

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Will there be any Metalmind Mints? With the slow release of the investiture in a metalmind rather than the sudden burst of taste that one would get from a muffin?

Good idea.  It would be nice to eat a speed-mint before an athletic competition…

 

Well metalminds do empty quicker than they fill up :P

No they don't; it's equal.  If you spend five minutes halving your weight, then you can spend five minutes doubling your weight.

 

Well, CadmiumMuffins just leave you hungry for more.

 

:lol:

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May I be on the research helper list?

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