A self destructive mindset is difficult. That’s probably what i am, not suicidal, but self destructive.
but from the kind of language I am seeing you start to use, you seem to be trying to be more aware of it and resisting it, which is really encouraging. Glad to see you’re starting to make progress.
do you think that the shard harms you mentally? Because if I am a part of that then I would encourage you to number one, continue stepping back every other week or so, and number two, taking that step of faith and having that conversation with your irl friends when you need to. Hierarchy of mental health help is from least helpful to most: (online friends, real friends/family, therapist) in my experience.
great to hear your intrusive thoughts are fading. Yours sound like they were much worse than mine, although mine are pretty much omnipresent if not less dangerous. Tangent but very good to hear.
Yeah idk i can definitely tell that a long day sitting in the back of a van with my phone or just straight up driving has mentally weighed on me, but the moment i went outside that kind of slipped away. You already know that that kind of thing is effective, though.
glad to hear you’re making some progress, though. I hope it continues well!