Darkness Ascendant

Haha HGTTG FTW. ---------------------------------------------- Darkness descended into the Dark Alley, a long winding alley that would put Knockturn alley to shame, if it existed. As he descended, he illuminated the alley, leaving bare all the deformed, twisted beings that resided there. They withered in the radiance and cowered, bowing before the Darkness. Darkness grinned, it never got old. Slowly he strode down the alley, windows on the sides of the alley opened, letting the light shine in. A cleansing was always welcome. As he strolled he saw his colleague Fatebreaker lecturing people on the Impossibility of pseudo-cognitive implementation in SoulGolems, his audience looking bored. A few gargoyles stood guard over the Alley, glaring at Darkness, they always hated his Dark Light. He saw his friend Straw interrupting Fatebreaker's lecture to hand in his thesis on time. Darkness walked over to check it out. "Interesting" Darkness said, looking over Fatebreaker's shoulder,"You have appeared to have mistaken Time with me. I assure you ol' Father Time is nothing like me. For one thing he's not quite as devilishly handsome as yours truly" Straw rolled his eyes,"Shut up Darkness, noone asked you". Darkness chuckled, "Your right, noone asked me to suck their souls out and Ruin their lives. I for one, have been upholding Dark Alley's tradition, and continuing what we came together to do" Fatebreaker looked up, having read Straw's thesis. "I'm afraid your wrong on multiple accounts here. Darkness is right, you have appeared to have mistaken Time with multiple other things. Time isn't darkness, nor is it the blood of the universe. Time is definitely not eternal, for it doesn't exist. I'm afraid time cannot pierce the fabric of reality, if that is what you mean by the dark veil of dimensions. Indeed it is unmeasurable, relatively, besides, how can time hold light??" he appeared to be thinking,"It can be considered the devourer seeing as many have falled prey to it. How exactly is it the doom of light?? If anything is eternal it is Darkness and Light ("Thanks" said Darkness). Interlocked and Interweaving in the Ying and Yang of the universe. Time can herald doom, it can occasionally be the doom, but I am afraid that is again relative. Sorry, Time isn't a void either. Sorry Straw, I'm afraid I cannot accept this. There are too many holes, and I think you need to learn a thing or two about time. Here's something for your troubles. Straw, Time is relative, it is a concept borne in the minds of men to bring some order to their chaotic lives, to be able to chronicle, mark, and record what we call "history". Time is a subjective reality. Nice try Straw, but I'm sorry, go have another try" Straw looked a bit peeved, and walked away, grumbling something about how noone knows what time is. "Aaaanyway, have you seen Voidus? Fatebreaker?" Darkness asked. "'Fraid not Darkness, maybe Gary knows, oi Gary get down here!" Fatebreaker answered, yelling out to Gary the Gargoyle. "What is it Fate? I was having a good time contemplating life up there" Gary grumbled. "Y'know were Voidus is?" "Yea, actually, he's brooding at his mansion at the end of the alley again, something about that game he created" "Thank you," Darkness said, striding away, "See you all" "See you Darkness," Fatebreaker called after. It took a few minutes to make his way to the other side, nodding to who he knew on his way. Finally he reached the mansion and knocked with the brass Slowpoke head shaped doorknocker. Voidus' servant Alvrid answered the door. "Ah, Master Ascendant, have you come to see Master Voidus?" "It's just Darkness scoot, how many times have I told you? And yes, I am would be much obliged if you did indeed got Voidus for me" Alfrid smiled and beckoned Darkness in, "come in, have a seat, I'll get Voidus in a minute" Darkness obliged and sat down on a dusty old sofa in Voidus' scarcely used living room. A minute later Alfrid returned, a Slowbro trailing down the stairs behind him. "Aye, Darkness, good to see you mate, what brings you here?" "Darkness stood and embraced his friend" said the narrator. Oops wasn't supposed to say that out loud. Darkness and Voidus separated. "'oo said that?" Voidus wondered, Darkness merely shrugged. "Eh my old da Slowking must still be haunting this mansion, eh, hadn't noticed, little fag". Darkness merely looked confused, "Eh, don't worry pal, sit down and tell me, why are you here?" "Oh, I just came to report that I've spiked another one, one of the newcomers, @lastofus is his name I think" "Niice, it's been a while since anyone's been spiked aye?" "Indeed it has, last one I spiked was around the middle of last month!" Darkness chuckled, "The other DA members should pick up their slack aye, those pesky Assassins in Technicolour have made things helluva hard around here. Stupid Bleeder, messing things up in our scientific endevours" "Yer right, maybe we should get everyone to work harder. I GOT IT. Whenever one of our member spikes somone, they get a cookie!" "Err, I don't think that will work Void, maybe an upvote? People are dying for those nowadays" "Perfect!" "Great, I'll make an announcement, see ya Void" With that, Darkness got up, high fived his friend and left the mansion darker than when he entered it. Voidus shuddered. Darkness moved to the announcement board where Fatebreaker's competition took up most of the space. "Greedy bastard," Darkness said, ripping it off, and putting his own announcement on the board. From here on forward Those who spike Will get an upvote! Cookies are optional! Smiling, Darkness left the alley, feeling a sense of accomplishment.

Yeah, I just gizoogled it. I think I will get it maybe next month. This month's reading roster is full.

aren't we...aren't we all *laughs manically*

Arre, me needs to read this right now. EDIT- XD one of the books is called Darkness Descending

May it be the best of days to yee as well me hearty

On another hand, Mafia III came out today. Psyched to play it.

Gizoogle me happy. Gizoogle 17th Shard, then check the letter sent from Frost to Hoid.

They straight up don't have it. It's scandalous.

I tried getting Red Rising at the library today. They only have the second and third books. what the hell?

and may it be happy day to you too young lass.

Ah ok On the other hand today be the day of yer's truly's birth!

*hands cake over to @lastofus* Enjoy

Aided by me!

WHAT? How are cake and cookies related? besides being baked???

Stress indeed. My parents somehow seem to overlook whenever I get straight A/Bs and focus on the one subject I'm bad at (relatively), which is maths.

Congratulations! Also, did you have time to prepare for it?

Now isn't that the question of all ages. If he keeps flirting with you even after you "send him the memo", then I reckon you should distance yourself from him.

And now I'm a Vanisher. I must be the last of our group. Why is this so high in the rep levels? It should at least be below Ghostbloods and Envisagers.

They never said anything about the cake, I assure you it's great, and it's been invested with some Bio-Chromatic Breath, so consuming it will give you one extra breath. If my mah checks out.

What's wrong with the cookies? Seriously, if you guys don't like my baking skills, then say it to my face next time. I do have some cake however @lastofus

Burnt. Why were you and Lopen removed from the Roshar cycle 6 pm

But....mushroom head....and laughter.....

Haha, I remember that now

Well done. I completely forgot about that.

eh