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Kobold King

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Everything posted by Kobold King

  1. Kobold King
    Hogwarts' doxie infestation has really gotten out of hand.
  2. Kobold King
    Would we kid about something this serious?
  3. Kobold King
    It sounds almost... condescending. How do you manage to sound condescending towards underwear? How? What? Why?
  4. Kobold King
    Imagine a world where you reincarnate as whatever killed you. If you die of old age or otherwise don't have a specific killer, you don't reincarnate at all. There are an awful lot of elderly people trying to get eaten by dragons in this world. The dragons are annoyed.
  5. Kobold King
    A brother to The Honor Spren is a brother to me! Welcome to to the Shard, Steelborn.
  6. Kobold King
    I'm really behind on Corvallis events--but then, so would Backtrack. He'll be heading to The Dalles soon according to our plans, but I think it'd be really fun to cart him over to Corvallis for a plot line!
  7. Kobold King
    If I recall correctly he was actually talking about an OC Epic named Skinnydipper, but thank you for that lovely mental image and new recurring nightmare.
  8. Kobold King
    Sometimes I wonder what things I do every day that the future, wiser me would cringe at. Mainly so I can annoy the heck out of him if I ever get a timey-wimey chance to meet him.
  9. Kobold King
    Shh, you'll make Chouta start shipping it.
  10. Kobold King
    That's why (spoiler alert) I really want Vondra to go down fighting. Not keen on writing the broken exile Vondra.
  11. Kobold King
    I'm still pretty sure all the pugs, ponies, and glitter are meant to help us cope with just how ridiculously dark this RP is.
  12. Kobold King
    Can you see it now?
  13. Kobold King
    Shut up and take my upvote!
  14. Kobold King
    Don't worry, I'm pretty sure New Orleans is in the Coven's territory. Shouldn't have to worry about Oregon-level Epic madness.
  15. Kobold King

    Howdy!

    1. Slowswift

      Slowswift

      yo

    2. Edgedancer

      Edgedancer

      I never expected Howdy! to become such a scary word.

  16. Kobold King
    Where's your entrepreneurial spirit?
  17. Kobold King
    RAFO.
  18. Kobold King
    Engineer a formula that turns people into undead cannibals. Use it as a food additive. No one will ever believe the fringe groups that claim artificial flavors can turn you into a zombie. Hide out in my bunker until society is close to the breaking point but not quite there yet. Market the only cure. Reap all the profit. Buy a bigger bunker defended by killer robots and populated with all my favorite writers. Muahahaha! The cure is only temporary! Sucks to be you, society! Watch the world burn. Watch a private screening of the Steelheart movie, seeing as Brandon Sanderson and all my favorite movie creators are in my private underground utopia now. Take time out of my day everyday to view an oversized computer monitor that shows me a real-life version of The Walking Dead played out by survivors of the zombie apocalypse above that I'm stalking. It should make for one heck of a series finale if they ever actually find my bunker. ??? Usually I'd say "Profit" here, but I'm already the happiest human being left on the planet in this scenario. So I guess I already did!
  19. Kobold King
    What if, hypothetically, your crime was stealing eighteen ocelots from a big cat sanctuary? Would they still let you in then?
  20. Kobold King
    If this were a sitcom, you'd be chased home by all the stray cats in the neighborhood. On another note--you can volunteer at big cat sanctuaries?
  21. Kobold King
    An accurate representation of the average gas station architect:
  22. Kobold King
    Eesh. Hope you're able to get that taken care of without too much of a headache. Stupid pole.
  23. Kobold King
    Excellent. I shall inform the mother.
  24. Kobold King
    Epic Name: Foxtrot Power: Full nervous control over people's legs. Not their entire bodies; just their legs. Uses this power to make people tap dance, mostly, but occasionally works as an enforcer for more powerful Epics by making them kneel. Surprisingly useful in combat; it's hard to aim a rifle or a blast of pyrokinesis when your legs want to swivel your body around in the other direction. Appearance: A very short, frail-looking person with glasses and an inhaler. The last person you'd expect to become a sadistic serial tap-dance enforcer. (Granted there probably aren't a lot of people you would expect to become sadistic serial tap-dance enforcers, but I'm sure they're out there.) Weakness: Unbeknownst to most people, Foxtrot was paralyzed from the waist down before Calamity. He walks now only by the use of his powers; he's actually gotten so good at it by this point he doesn't even have to think about it. Handicap signs remind him, however, and cancel out his abilities. I can't resist coming up with characters around the powers.
  25. Kobold King
    Hey Chouta, in case you wind up missing it.
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