Kobold King

Is it wrong that I want to see an Epic!Aquaman vanquish Nighthound by summoning the sea ponies?

I'm still not sure what incident you imagined, which is probably for the best. It sounds pretty traumatizing. (I wonder what the next redeemed Epic story will be. )

I think you shouldn't put too much stock into what the wacky people on the Random Stuff thread say about your life choices. Rice flour cookies sound good. We usually use almond flour, but I bet rice would work too. :ph3r:

You monster! There were entire halves of those cookies that weren't singed! Do you have any idea how badly I wanted to eat one of those things!?! Ahem. Your choice, I suppose.

Environmentalist joke for y'all. A logging tycoon is meeting with a world-famous lumberjack, hoping to recruit him for their new operation. They chat for a while, with the tycoon finally steering the conversation back to the lumber industry. "So," the tycoon says casually, "You've done a lot of work in the logging business?" "That I have," the lumberjack grunts. "I've worked on every continent." "Fascinating," the tycoon replies. "Where, would you say, have you done your best work?" "Down in the Sahara Forest," the woodcutter answers. "I got a lot of good timber down there." The tycoon raises an eyebrow, confused. "Don't you mean the Sahara Desert?" he asks finally. The lumberjack takes a long gulp of coffee, and then nods his head sagely. "Yep," he explains, "That's what they call it these days." ... HAHAHAHA! It's funny because the logging industry alters the environment on a large and usually destructive level.

"Ms Lockser? Ms Runes?" "Yes Commander Vondra?" "You have one minute to explain to me why you've sprinkled instant guacamole powder in a giant circle around HQ."

What is your favorite book?

Would you rather fight a hundred six-inch tall Timeports, or a single six-hundred-foot tall Timeport?

And from then on out, Arsenal's catchphrase for dealing with rowdy Guards would be "Holy guacamole, you sure are a handful!"

Probably the funniest part of this comic was the smudge on my computer screen that made it look like Arsenal's brow was beaded with sweat. Consider it canon now that avocados are Arsenal's weakness.

Do you believe in life on other planets? If you could send one message to an interstellar alien civilization, what would it be?

"Oh no, not again."

I don't believe in performance-enhancing drugs.

Your blood. If you're going to drain my blood and force me into some horrifying decision, I'm taking you out with me. Alternate answer: anything with garlic, to give a vampire a nasty shock some day.

Maybe she's already playing right into their nefarious plans without even realizing it. Um, I... I don't know what to say to that possibility.

"Become" sentient? For all you know I've intended for them to be sentient and manipulating Backtrack's actions this whole time. Though Shiny teleporting Backtrack and MV to Portland would definitely help move things along.

Excalibur. Why would I pick some dumb sword that has to be reforged by magical elf smiths before I can even wield it? Talk about high maintenance, am I right? I'll go with the old classic, Ms. Lady of the Lake. Butter pecan, and pistachio gelato if it counts. They're both saltier than the average ice cream flavor, and I adore the interplay between the salty and sweet flavors. Also, when my mom makes the latter I get to sneak a few pistachios while we're de-shelling them, making pistachio gelato a win-win kind of treat. My favorite Harry Potter book... that's a tough question, but I'd have to go with The Prisoner of Azkaban as my favorite. It's short, like all the first three, but it's packed with amazing twists and turns, awesome scenes, stupendous reveals, and tantalizing worldbuilding. From Goblet of Fire onwards the series starts getting darker; still amazing, but darker and slightly less appealing to me. For that reason, The Deathly Hallows is my least favorite. Spoilers below: As for your last question... I'm sorry, is that even a question? A TARDIS. Obviously. I'd escape the island in a jiffy, and have a means of traversing time and space permanently at my disposal. If I can just figure out to fly the blasted thing... No. At first I was like: And then I was like: And finally I was like: In all honesty or earnestness, I couldn't be more delighted. Perhaps it's arrogant of me to say it, but every upvote is a symbol of a laugh, smile, or thoughtful nod of the head I managed to inspire from someone over a distance of thousands of miles with nothing but a computer screen at my disposal. And not only am I successful at entertaining people, but I've also became forum-famous for it? That is quite genuinely a dream come true for my small ambitions. Well, for one thing, those six AMAs were all made by different members. If you started posting random pony threads, you'd eventually make enough for a new sub-forum... but the sub-forum would be devoted to you, not just ponies. You may think on that and see it as awesome. But if you created enough off-topic pony discussions to necessitate it, the Quiver Board wouldn't be your own personal playground; it would be a prison. You'd be prohibited from posting outside of it. You would wander its closed confines like a caged whitespine, longing to be free so you could once again stalk the main boards with your pony-ness. Your longing for freedom would turn to bitterness. In time, your hatred for all other forms of life would become legend. Even your friends would shun the Quiver Board out of fear of the dark monster you've become. Trapped in isolation, your rage would sour into a cold and unremovable odium for all things 17th Shard or pony. Years would go by. New members would come and go, warned upon their entrance two things: Don't accept cookies from strangers, and avoid the Quiver Board at all costs. Some would ignore the warnings, to be found months later posting gibbering rants about Rarity on the Mistborn discussion board, their minds frayed by contact with your twisted intellect. Eventually Chaos and the other admins would overcome the primordial fear you'd come to inspire in them long enough to ban you and hide your forum. To their dismay, it doesn't work. The banning fails. The hiding of the board doesn't take. Their attempt only opens a rift in the Quiver Board, allowing you to once again break free of your binds and roar in triumph over the forum. The new members will stare at you quizzically, before mashing their keyboards in sudden terror at your madness-inducing visage. The older members will be long gone, safe in sealed bunkers across the country where they've waited for this day. You will swivel your many eyes around the forum. You will smile with one of your ten mouths. You will open a beak and sing the song that destroys first the 17th Shard, and then shakes the very universe to its foundations. "My little pony, my little pony. Aah, aah, aaaah..."

Can you give an example of one of the random thoughts your member title boasts of?

Actually, that's something Backtrack could do, considering he can peer into people's heads at past points in their lives and objectively see what they were feeling at a certain time. Of course, he'd be too squeamish to actually peer back at a woman giving birth, and if you kicked him in the groin he'd be too busy sobbing and groaning in pain to report his judgment, so that question will have to remain unanswered.

Or maybe you just need to do some more... For what it's worth, I would eat those. If I didn't have gluten intolerance.

I'm not sure whether you're my hero, or a lighthouse of failure whose example I should avoid following at all costs.

They won't. The only reason anyone keeps secrets on the Reckoners RPG is for the sake of entertaining each other with plot twists. There's no emphasis on tricking or outmaneuvering each other, and there are no winners. In fact, people often plan out how their characters will die long in advance. Point is, the Reckoners RPG isn't so much a game as it is a collaborative freewritten fanfiction. There's no scheming or backstabbing, and by the power invested in me as a deputy GM I will make sure there never is any.

I like a lot of different musicians and songs, with no real pattern to the things I like. I enjoy Ponchielli's "Dance of the Hours" as much as I enjoy Imagine Dragons' "Radioactive." With that said, here lately I've become increasingly fond of some of the fan music created by the brony community, such as "Nightmare Night," "Lullaby for a Princess," and "I am Octavia." I'll be honest with you, I haven't listened to much of Owl City. The only song I've listened to from them is "When Can I See You Again," because it played at the end of Wreck-It Ralph, which I enjoyed. Though to be honest, I've listened to this voice-modified PMV more than I've listened to the original song.

You should come join the Reckoners RPG. Everyone there is friendly, open, and more concerned with telling a good collaborative story than with any idea of "winning."

This is exactly the reason why you'll never, ever see me in the Sanderson Elimination games.