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Messing up Cosmere Magic Names


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So I was talking to my friend a while ago, and he was trying to guess what biochromatic breath was actually called from a description I gave deliberately horribly:

'you use breath to make things move'

He gave me a bunch of random names like oxyglurgy, aerokinesis, etc etc

Got me thinking. What are some other names everyone is else can come up with for cosmere magic systems? They cannot be correct, they have to be horribly put together. Be funny!

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Karate go boom / karate go brrrrrr (ChayShan) 

[pocket sand vine] (sand mastery) 

Stab people or suffer unspecified health consequences (Hemalurgy) 

Keeping promises and getting rewarded for it (Radiance) 

Hemalurgy (tricked you, it's referring to the blood magic on Sel!) 

Argentum Momentum (silver) 

The Magic of Being Composed of Five Hundred Crabs In a Trenchcoat: *googles crab in latin* Cancer Mastery (Dysian Aimians) 

Stigmatancy: Being able to instantly tattoo yourself (lookin' at you, Axies/Siah Aimians) 

And some non-cosmere: 


Scopaesthesia + SWORDS FROM YOUR BRAIN (cytonics) 

Cretachemy (Rithmatics) 

Ophthalmology (Oculation) 

Being So Bad At Stuff You're Good At It (Talents) 


Edited by AonEne
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New vape flavor: dead gods! [Stormlight]

I get knocked down, but I get up again - ain't nothing gonna keep me down [Gold feruchemy]

"It's not flying, it's falling with style!" [Lashings]

Hacked the source code, hope no one notices [Forgery]

Basically a mood ring [Royal Locks]

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