The Knights Awkward

[I Am Witless she/her]

I Am Witless enters the room awkwardly.

I Am Witless isn't good at roleplaying.

"Books before friends, 17th Shard before the real world, Release days before birthdays." She mutters, avoiding eye contact. "I will read that which has not been read, I will stay silent amongst many words, I will enjoy without being upvoted." She looks around, but ends up back at her feet. "I also came here for a spiked cookie. If anyone has one. Y'know....."

 

 

[MacThorstenson he/him]

I am Witless hears a whisper from a shadowy hallway, "Hey kid, you wanna cookie? Come to the dark alley, we have plenty."

[Darjeeling he/him]

Darjeeling entered the stronghold of the Knights Awkward somewhat awkwardly. He had everything he needed with him in order to join the illustrious order: a bag of dice, spare character sheets, a full pencil case, and more notebooks than he knew what to do with.

"Hello there," he announced to the room at large. "I'm here to join the Knights and pledge myself to being a Rolesmith."

All he had to do now, it seemed, was take the oaths.

"Books before friends.

17th Shard before the real world.

Release dates before birthdays.

 

I will bind others together with fictional narratives.

I will battle on, even if my fictional characters fall around me.

I shall raise my strength stat to defend those without, even at the cost of my resources."

[Allomancy she/her]

Ally is very confused how she isn't dead yet, since she seems to have a problem with staying present. 

"I'M NOT DEAD YET!" she yells "TIS BUT A FLESH WOUND!". She also looks around and sees many new people. "Oh, why hello..." she suddenly becomes very self-conscious and looks around. "Are bookies still a thing? I think I might need one now..." 

[CarolaDavar she/her]

"I got bookies!" Carola yells, running through the room, "I tried to back an Oathbringer batch, but it got spoiled. So, alas, this batch may have a Sadeas bookie somewhere."

She proffers the tray to the newcomers, "take one! They're great!"

[T8* he/him]

T8* stumbles into the fortress of the knights awkward and sets down the stack of 20 books he was carrying. He (somewhat awkwardly) says "Great MIstrunner, I wish to join the ranks of the knights awkward as a Convertshaper

"Books before friends.

17th Shard before the real world.

Release dates before birthdays."

He pauses to readjust his books so they don't fall over.

"I will convert those who are not

I will convince those without to buy two copies

I will loan my extras to anyone without"

As he lifts his head, he sees that he is not pointed towards Mistrunner's throne, but at the wall right next to it. He quickly readjust's his position ans bows his head again, waiting for a reply.

[Nohadon he/him]

Noha walks into the room. Hey there? Nice fake beard! Oh, thats real? Could've fooled me! Anyway, what was i doing here? Ah, yes. I remember now! 

Books before friends.

17th Shard before the real world.

Release dates before birthdays.

I will make fun of the unmakefunnable
I shall be frustrating when people hate me for it
I will not reuse jokes on pain of being dunked in a highstorm

There we go! Out of curiousity, what order are you @Mistrunner? Do we have fellow quipsmith among us? Although some semblance of Wit is required for this order, a semblance you seem to be lacking...

 

Noha sits down mumbling about how flawed everyone else's Awkwardspren are.

[LopenTheTwoArmedHerdazian]

As he enters the room, Lopen notices a servant, walks up to them and says " Have you ever heard about how I swore my first ideal of the Knights Awkward? Of course not, you probably don't even know what it is. Here:

Books before friends.

17th Shard before the real world.

Release dates before birthdays."

A cold chill rose through him, and Ashe, the spren who had been stalking him for days, gave a Hoidesque smile. Lopen scowled, " I was saving it for a more dramatic moment. Bah! No matter. The Lopen would like to join your guild, great Mistrunner, the second most attractive person on Roshar! I believe that the Herald Hoid himself wants me to join his order, so I will oblige!" Looks to Mistrunner with a smile seen only on the lips of Quipsmiths,  but his eyes betray how unsure he is. How will his brazen attitude fair with one so powerful? His heart is as scrambled as a mind seeing High Imperial for the first time. He then trips over an Awkwardspren, earning a respectful glance from some members of the court, before they returned back to their books. But Mistrunner does not flinch, she simply keeps mumbling to herself about the 25th anniversary edition of Elantris, only the top of her head poking out above a copy of WOR. What will she decide? Meanwhile, he seems to have attracted so many shamespren that his figure is completely obscured, with some fearspren in there to mix it up.

Edited February 3, 2018 by LopenTheTwoArmedHerdazian

[Le Sigh]

The room suddenly became dark. Through the stained-glass windows depicting various scenes from Sanderson fanfic, ominous looking clouds covered the sky, occasionally crackling with red lightning. Shadows grew longer; spheres, usually bright with Booklight, suddenly grew dark; a chill swept through the room, and everyone got the vague sense that something was wrong. However, if one were a true expert of the Surges of the Knights Awkward, one might recognize the work of a Surgebinder here.

Specifically, one using the Surge of Dramatic Tension.

Like many others had before, the doors were banged open, and a strange figure strode in. He was covered in a strange lilac crystal armor, which covered the entire body and included a purple cloak and crystalline helm which shadowed the face, but from which golden locks could be seen flowing. They also carried an Awkwardblade in the form of a feathered pen, but somehow they seemed to use it relatively elegantly, unlike most.

The figure stopped before the assembled Knights Awkward. There was silence for a moment, and then the figure let out a low chuckle.  "So," he said in a smooth yet dangerous voice. "You probably assume me to be some random fop, showing up here with a horrible grasp on RP mechanics and making some lame Mistborn references.

"Unfortunately, that is not my reason for coming here. Lord Forium has decided this rebellion has gone on long enough. You humans have enslaved the Fanshendi long enough. It is time that we took back this kingdom.

"My name is Le Sigh, and I shall be the doom of the Knights Awkward."

Edited October 11, 2018 by Le Sigh
fix for lore

[Grey Knight]

9 minutes ago, Le Sigh said:

The room suddenly became dark. Through the stained-glass windows depicting various scenes from Sanderson fanfic, ominous looking clouds covered the sky, occasionally crackling with red lightning. Shadows grew longer; spheres, usually bright with Oddlight, suddenly grew dark; a chill swept through the room, and everyone got the vague sense that something was wrong. However, if one were a true expert of the Surges of the Knights Awkward, one might recognize the work of a Surgebinder here.

Specifically, one using the Surge of Dramatic Tension.

Like many others had before, the doors were banged open, and a strange figure strode in. He (or was it a she?) was covered in a strange lilac crystal armor, which covered the entire body and included a purple cloak and crystalline helm which enshadowed the face, but from which golden locks could be seen flowing. They also carried an Awkwardblade in the form of a feathered pen, but somehow they seemed to use it relatively elegantly, unlike most.

The figure stopped before the assembled Knights Awkward. There was silence for a moment, and then the figure let out a low chuckle.  "So," they said in a smooth yet dangerous voice. "You probably assume me to be some random fop, showing up here with a horrible grasp on RP mechanics and making some lame Mistborn references.

"Unfortunately, that is not my reason for coming here. Lord Forium has decided this rebellion has gone on long enough. You humans have enslaved the Fanshendi long enough. It is time that we took back this kingdom.

"My name is Le Sigh, and I shall be the doom of the Knights Awkward."

Quote

Have an upvote, you magnificent cremling 

Also, welcome to the forum!

 

 

[Le Sigh]

35 minutes ago, Grey Knight said:

 

Wow I joined an hour ago nad already I'm famous

Also thanks Grey Knight

 

[Dustbringer12 he/him]

". . . I shall be the doom of the Knights Awkward."

Jeirid looked up, "Doom? I thought we ordered waffles!  Also, if I choose to be here, is it really enslavement. . ."

Then, pondering the nature his own question, he walks into the blazing fireplace on accident.  His hair proceeds to combust awkwardly, as he ponders the nature of doom.

Edit: He himself seems to be fireproof

Edited September 20, 2018 by RubiksCube

[Le Sigh]

Le Sigh stood with mouth slightly agape as nothing happened around him. Nobody stepped up to stop him. The only guy doing anything was standing in the fireplace, mumbling about enslavement and waffles.

As a matter of fact, where was everyone? Le Sigh looked around. The Fanshendi leaders had told him there were a bunch of humans running around here. However, the place seemed empty. It was... well, awkward. For all that effort he'd put into that dramatic speech, nobody was there to hear it.

At least, nobody who might appreciate it, the warrior thought, scowling at the man on fire. Better go interrogate him.

Le Sigh walked up to the man standing in the fireplace, grabbing him by his shirt and lifting him up so their faces were level. "Where are the other Knights Awkward? Where have they gone?"

Edited October 11, 2018 by Le Sigh

[Edgerunner]

 

"Even though he hadn't yet sworn an Ideal, Edgerunner glowed with Stormlight (would it still be Stormlight for a Knight Awkward?). Power rippling through him, he spoke:

Books before friends.

17th Shard before the real world.

Release dates before birthdays.

His faint glow sparked into a bonfire of Light."

Do I have to swear an Ideal and join an Order now, or can I do that later?

[Dustbringer12 he/him]

Jeirid looked up at Le Sigh's question.  "It has something to do with the night's special meditation form called Awkward Pause. We -- " 

He cuts off as Edgerunner spoke the ideal of awkwardness filling with Booklight (see pg. 23 for a refrence.  Yes, I read through the first 23 pages [for the second time] before posting. . . ).

"There's another knight awkward there," he said, pointing at edgerunner.  Then, he notices he is in the fireplace, and yelps, jumping out of the flame, stumbling into Le Sigh.  

"Sorry," he mumbles.

[Ink he/him]

Inklingspren walks in, confused at the place he had encountered. people were gathered, saying words of power. "What the heck is this place?" Ink asks.

[Le Sigh]

Le Sigh swiftly turned to look towards the two new people - one who, completely disregarding his obvious dangerousness and awesomeness, had spoken the Ideals of a Knight Awkward right in front of him - and the other person didn't look like he was a Knight at all, or that he wanted to be one.

Le Sigh pointed a gauntletted finger at the one who had spoken the Ideals. "YOU!!!" he boomed. "How dare you speak those vile oaths in this place of- GAH!!!"

This last word came from when the man who had been standing in the fireplace noticed that he was on fire, and crashed into Le Sigh in an attempt to escape. The large warrior soon found himself lying on the ground under the Knight.

"Get. Off," Le Sigh said through gritted teeth. "NOW."

[Dustbringer12 he/him]

"Sorry," Jeirid says again, mortified.  He climbs off, and proceeds to hide in the corner with his third copy of Way of Kings and a random bookie.

[Silva]

Silva awkwardly trailed in. Initially she'd assumed this had been simply a necro that would fall dead again, though that had yet to happen. 

How strange. She thought, taking in the room's inhabitants.

[Le Sigh]

Le Sigh stood up, dusting himself off. So far, he was rather unimpressed with - as well as seriously pissed off at - the Knights Awkward. From Forium's descriptions, he'd imagined a bunch of strong and honorable warriors, not a bunch of weak, clumsy weebs who couldn't even be bothered to acknowledge a major villain when they saw one.

He walked over to Edgerunner (OOC: Not bothering to tag him as he is currently a dead user), who had just spoken the Oaths and then asked him a question about how Surgebinding works. As if he'd ever be allied with these bumbling fools.

"You," he said imposingly, pointing a finger at the Knight like every anime villain ever. "You want to become a Knight Awkward? Then you will have to go through me!"

He waited for a tense minute. Then another. And another. Edgerunner continued to stare at him.

"Hey, uh, you there?" Le Sigh asked. He waved a hand over the Knight's face. "Hold on a sec."

Le Sigh used the Surge of Meta-tation. Immediately, he gained insight to everything about Edgerunner; his reputation, his followers, his content count... and the time he last visited.

"Ah, hell. He's a dead user." Le Sigh lowered his arm. "Figures, it could've been a great battle scene. I've always wanted to try out the Surge of Adherence and see how it could work in combat..."

The giant warrior turned to the other three people in the room - @RubiksCube, @Inklingspren, and @Silva - who were presumably still alive. Well, not for long, at least, he thought. One Knight and two others; he suspected this would be rather easy.

"Very well, then," Le Sigh said. "Your doom is neigh. The Knights Awkward shall fall once and for all."

[Silva]

"Well technically I never swore any oaths to make me one of the Knights Awkward," Silva says innocently. "So is my doom also nigh?"

[Le Sigh]

Le Sigh shot Silva a suffering look. "No, of course not. I only hate humans who happen to be YES OF COURSE YOU WILL DIE!!!" the warrior snapped.

Then he suddenly became serene. Raising his Awkwardblade, he spoke. "Pray I make this swift, all of you. Come at me. Show me what the Knights Awkward (and whatever you two represent) are made of." Le Sigh assumed Wordstance. The combat had begun.

[Silva]

Silva threw up her hands. "Um, couldn't we talk about this or something?" She knew it was hopeless, but being pacifist at heart there was no way she wouldn't try. Either way, she moved closer to the door just to be safe. Since, you know, being pacifist and all, Silva had no clue how to fight.

[Ink he/him]

Ink groaned. "I never did anything to you, man," he said. "I'm not even one of these... whadda ya call em? Knights awkward? Also, how do you become one? Cause I want superpowers."

[Dustbringer12 he/him]

Jeirid stands up, taking an offensive stance and summoning his awkwardblade.  "That name . . . Rubikscube . . . is not the name I go by, because it makes no sense in this reality.  For bringing up that dichotomy I will not show you what I'm made of!"

He hesitates.  "Though it's mostly water, if you're curious."