Mental health club!

[Hoid Slayer He/Him]

8 hours ago, Hawks said:

Okookim here when I wanna be sleeping but my mind is akwjowodjrhwhw and im trying not to cry  and I wish I had someone who I was comfortable hugging to give me a hug and just yeah  

Basically

Yesterday I had to miss some school for softball and I was like whatever im doing good in the class

Sprout: where r u??? Your missing a huge research project that's like die in ten days

Me: storm THIS ATUPID stormING WORLD

ok sooooo context

English class. I have a huge research project my dumbass teacher didn't give any info on in canvas. AND IM GONNA BE GONE FOR TWO OF THE TWN DAYS = 8 DAYS AND MY DUMBASS CANT DO THAT MUCH

AND stormING MORONS IN COMPUTWR ART MADE A LILE 300 POINT ASSIGMNENT DUE AT THE END OF THE YEAR GET BUMBED TO TODAY AND I ALSO HAVE THIS OTHER ASSIGMNENT I JAVE TO DO THATS TAKING ALL MY stormING TIME BECAUSE PEOPLE JUDGE MY ART AND WOW MAYBE THATS WHY IM A PERFECTTIONIST YOU DUMBASS LEAVE ME ALONE ITS A stormING HAND OK?

AND I CANT MATH FOR THE LIFE OF ME 4 different ways later AND I STILL CANT GET IT I swear im abouta ask chaos of he can mentor me bc I'm to dumb for this im missing ALL MY WORK FROM LAST UNIT BC IM stormING SPED

*screams*

I CANT DO THIS I . CANT. DO. THIS. IM NOT AS SMART AS I SEEMED LAST YEAR 

Everyone says oh your smart NUH UH O CANT EVEN FIGURE OUR WHATS WRONG WITH ME!?!?

HOW IS THAT SMART!!!!!

I feel depressed when I shouldn't be i feel overwhelmed but others are doing more and aren't as stressed and so then I'm being dramatic and I WANNA BREAK DOWN BUT I CANT

im trying to hold it together. Be happy have a good attitude. Ya know? But im so close to snapping. Like go non joke crazy. I swear im not ok. I'm not ok im not ok im not ok. I'm going imcrazy. I swear im not joking I see my storming sanity disappearing. I. I m. I cant I cant I cant I cant. Who do I tell? Everyone says oh your handling it well NO IM NOahah im pretending I am. Bc I cant trust you with my emotions mom. It's not your fault. Actually it is. Past you. Sure I know you changed but traummaaa. And you say why won't you get over it I try o try I try I try I try I CANT. sure I'd like to have a sane relationship but I cant bc you'd hate the real me and so would dad. Even my sister would. I see her judge me when I talk to my friends. I dont know I dont know I dont know I DONT KNOW I swear in lauging like a crazy person right now.

I cant i cant I cant . I m gonna break. I need advice

I need help 

There's so much in here to break down but if you could pls do bc I'm

Actually i dont even care anymore

Why should I

It's useless

To care. I try to care about People. And they hurt me. But I take it. I forgive them. I apologize apologize apologize and people get annoyed at that but if I dont apologize they think im a jerk and I rely on others opinions to fuel myself bc my self esteem is so low I cant even see it. 

Im pretty sure im having a mental breakdown. Im trying trying trying I can't cant cant. 

*hugs hard*

*still hugging*

*and now too*

I’m sorry I’m a little late.I understand what you’re saying. A little. I won’t tell you you’re doing great, because clearly, you won’t believe that. But… just because you aren’t doing great doesn’t mean you aren’t great. And you are great. You’re in the top ten greatest people I know. Maybe higher.

And it feels a little crazy to respond to you so calmly when you’re in such a volatile state, but I don’t really know what’s crazy anymore so I’ll just go with what is.

Maybe you do need help. Honestly. Stop fighting this alone. If you already have a therapist and don’t feel like they’re working, maybe try to get another. Explain to your parents that you need more help without telling them exactly why.

Just don’t suffer alone. That is the hardest hell to crawl out of.

Maybe I can even help you with some of your work (assuming I understand it, I don’t know if I will).

And finally, I wouldn’t hate the real you. Would you hate the real me? I know my sister probably would. So would some of my friends. Honestly, so do I sometimes. But I doubt you guys would. That’s why I feel safe posting here (that and anonymity, but that’s something different). So yeah. You can talk to people. Don’t fight alone.

[#1 Taln Fan he/him]

9 hours ago, Hawks said:

Im pretty sure im having a mental breakdown. Im trying trying trying I can't cant cant. 

*hugs*

 

9 hours ago, Hawks said:

I feel depressed when I shouldn't be i feel overwhelmed but others are doing more and aren't as stressed and so then I'm being dramatic and I WANNA BREAK DOWN BUT I CANT

 

*hugs*

There's no "shouldn't be", and you shouldn't feel guilty for feeling overwhelmed. It's not dramatic to have feelings, and to be overwhelmed and depressed. It alr sucks enough to be depressed, don't add guilt on top of that 
Ik school can be hella stressful, but my best advice is to just do what you can. Don't worry about all the worst case scenarios, just get as much done today as you can, and focus on what you can do. Then at least when everything's done, you can know you at least tried your best, and there's some solace in that. Also, oftentimes the workload isn't as bad as it seems once you just buckle down and grind it out. (And I get that's easier said than done when you can't focus, ik)

I might elaborate more in a bit, but I got a test in 2 mins xD
But things *will* get better, I promise. Hang in there 

[Keke They/he]

8 hours ago, Kaladin Stormcursed said:

*rubs back and offers cookie*

*accepts*

8 hours ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*hugs*

wish I could help more

love ya' dude

*hugs*

3 hours ago, alittleinsane said:

SHJFDOABHSDLNFJKA:LBSDGJNF thank youfufufuf

yea lol I’ve watched up to the star plasma arc, and read up to the culling games

megumi is my son, so i don’t want to read much furthur

leave him alone gegeeeeee

 

SHUSH I HAVENT READ THE MANGA!!!!!! Shhhhhhh

2 hours ago, Spark of Hope said:

*biiiiiiiiig hug*

*hugs*

36 minutes ago, Hoid Slayer said:

*hugs hard*

*still hugging*

*and now too*

I’m sorry I’m a little late.I understand what you’re saying. A little. I won’t tell you you’re doing great, because clearly, you won’t believe that. But… just because you aren’t doing great doesn’t mean you aren’t great. And you are great. You’re in the top ten greatest people I know. Maybe higher.

And it feels a little crazy to respond to you so calmly when you’re in such a volatile state, but I don’t really know what’s crazy anymore so I’ll just go with what is.

Maybe you do need help. Honestly. Stop fighting this alone. If you already have a therapist and don’t feel like they’re working, maybe try to get another. Explain to your parents that you need more help without telling them exactly why.

Just don’t suffer alone. That is the hardest hell to crawl out of.

Maybe I can even help you with some of your work (assuming I understand it, I don’t know if I will).

And finally, I wouldn’t hate the real you. Would you hate the real me? I know my sister probably would. So would some of my friends. Honestly, so do I sometimes. But I doubt you guys would. That’s why I feel safe posting here (that and anonymity, but that’s something different). So yeah. You can talk to people. Don’t fight alone.

You’re not late Dw. Still feel like crap today. I talked to my therapist and thats how it surfaced. Then the appointment ended before we could do anything so i got left without anything. 

I wouldn’t hate the real you. 

4 minutes ago, #1 Taln Fan said:

*hugs*

 

*hugs*

There's no "shouldn't be", and you shouldn't feel guilty for feeling overwhelmed. It's not dramatic to have feelings, and to be overwhelmed and depressed. It alr sucks enough to be depressed, don't add guilt on top of that 
Ik school can be hella stressful, but my best advice is to just do what you can. Don't worry about all the worst case scenarios, just get as much done today as you can, and focus on what you can do. Then at least when everything's done, you can know you at least tried your best, and there's some solace in that. Also, oftentimes the workload isn't as bad as it seems once you just buckle down and grind it out. (And I get that's easier said than done when you can't focus, ik)

I might elaborate more in a bit, but I got a test in 2 mins xD
But things *will* get better, I promise. Hang in there 

Ik i shouldnt feel guilty but when i go to practice barely able to keep my crap together after the day there’s the slontzees there is hate who will look at me with hate and disgust for trying to not break. I’ve already had three all out panic attacks at practice before and i dont want to have more.

ill try to get it done. I just dont wanna fail bc you fail two classes you retake that grade and i cant because ill be behind my friends and they are the only lifeline. And in order to go to college i gotta do good. And i shouldnt be thinking about that im only 14 years old but my parents are like oh yeah college college. What are you gonna do. You could drop out at 16 and take the hisec and get a job and go to college early. And i say yeah i wanna stay in school bc normally i like it bc im a nerd.  IM A FRESHMAN i should be focusing on other stuff. And my teacher in computer art  makes everything worth so many points. If i miss one assignment my grade goes from an a to f. And i English i have a c and missing a 100point assignment would drop it to a d or f. My math grade is a low d. So…. God im ranting again. Sorry my brain is just whirling and im storming happy i dont have to do anything in this class. But i cant do my English work or my math work or any other work bc i can only do those in class and today we have this bs thing and im happy for it bc we get to hang out with kindergarteners and I love kids bc they are so innocent and pure and happy, but all my other classes are short, 

ok i swear im dont talking now. Sorry  

[Through the Living Hope]

2 minutes ago, Hawks said:

*accepts*

*hugs*

SHUSH I HAVENT READ THE MANGA!!!!!! Shhhhhhh

*hugs*

You’re not late Dw. Still feel like crap today. I talked to my therapist and thats how it surfaced. Then the appointment ended before we could do anything so i got left without anything. 

I wouldn’t hate the real you. 

Ik i shouldnt feel guilty but when i go to practice barely able to keep my crap together after the day there’s the slontzees there is hate who will look at me with hate and disgust for trying to not break. I’ve already had three all out panic attacks at practice before and i dont want to have more.

ill try to get it done. I just dont wanna fail bc you fail two classes you retake that grade and i cant because ill be behind my friends and they are the only lifeline. And in order to go to college i gotta do good. And i shouldnt be thinking about that im only 14 years old but my parents are like oh yeah college college. What are you gonna do. You could drop out at 16 and take the hisec and get a job and go to college early. And i say yeah i wanna stay in school bc normally i like it bc im a nerd.  IM A FRESHMAN i should be focusing on other stuff. And my teacher in computer art  makes everything worth so many points. If i miss one assignment my grade goes from an a to f. And i English i have a c and missing a 100point assignment would drop it to a d or f. My math grade is a low d. So…. God im ranting again. Sorry my brain is just whirling and im storming happy i dont have to do anything in this class. But i cant do my English work or my math work or any other work bc i can only do those in class and today we have this bs thing and im happy for it bc we get to hang out with kindergarteners and I love kids bc they are so innocent and pure and happy, but all my other classes are short, 

ok i swear im dont talking now. Sorry  

*bigger hug*

I know time is a major restriction, but low key getting that surfaced and then running out of time for the appointment is bull shrimp.

And you're right. You shouldn't have to be worrying about any of that, you should be having fun and enjoying school and learning.

[Mags she/they]

me every time my English teacher gives us an assignment: >:|

[Through the Living Hope]

2 minutes ago, Mag said:

me every time my English teacher gives us an assignment: >:|

Yikes

[Mags she/they]

6 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

Yikes

THEY'RE ALL SO POINTLESS TOO GRRR

[Through the Living Hope]

Just now, Mag said:

THEY'RE ALL SO POINTLESS TOO GRRR

What are the assignments?

[Mags she/they]

1 minute ago, Spark of Hope said:

What are the assignments?

read an article

write a thing about

read another article

write a thing about it

read another thing

write something similar

KLAJ:LKSDJ:LKFJ:LKF okay I'm overreacting it's just frustrating

[Through the Living Hope]

Just now, Mag said:

read an article

write a thing about

read another article

write a thing about it

read another thing

write something similar

KLAJ:LKSDJ:LKFJ:LKF okay I'm overreacting it's just frustrating

My sociology class has something similar

Over the course of the semester we have to analyze

- 4 articles/podcasts

- 2 documentaries (I hate documentaries)

- 1 book. This one finally gave me an excuse to read 1984

[Mags she/they]

3 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

My sociology class has something similar

Over the course of the semester we have to analyze

- 4 articles/podcasts

- 2 documentaries (I hate documentaries)

- 1 book. This one finally gave me an excuse to read 1984

I wish it was that diverse, every class period is sooo monotonous. And I LIKE writing essays, I can't imagine awful it would be if I didn't . . . 

[Keke They/he]

1 hour ago, Spark of Hope said:

*bigger hug*

I know time is a major restriction, but low key getting that surfaced and then running out of time for the appointment is bull shrimp.

And you're right. You shouldn't have to be worrying about any of that, you should be having fun and enjoying school and learning.

Thank you

35 minutes ago, Mag said:

me every time my English teacher gives us an assignment: >:|

Real

26 minutes ago, Mag said:

THEY'RE ALL SO POINTLESS TOO GRRR

REAL

23 minutes ago, Mag said:

read an article

write a thing about

read another article

write a thing about it

read another thing

write something similar

KLAJ:LKSDJ:LKFJ:LKF okay I'm overreacting it's just frustrating

DO WE HAVE THE SAME TEACHER OR SMTHNG

[Mags she/they]

10 minutes ago, Hawks said:

Thank you

Real

REAL

DO WE HAVE THE SAME TEACHER OR SMTHNG

MAYBE

Idk about this teacher man . . . I try really hard to like her because she seems nice and a lot of other students love her. But she has such a weird vibe and acts very strangely sometimes (this is separate from the assignments btw, which are out of her control). It doesn't help that I have a super hard time reading her facial expressions for some reason (attack of the suspected neurodivergence)

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

2 hours ago, Hawks said:

*accepts*

*hugs*

SHUSH I HAVENT READ THE MANGA!!!!!! Shhhhhhh

*hugs*

You’re not late Dw. Still feel like crap today. I talked to my therapist and thats how it surfaced. Then the appointment ended before we could do anything so i got left without anything. 

I wouldn’t hate the real you. 

Ik i shouldnt feel guilty but when i go to practice barely able to keep my crap together after the day there’s the slontzees there is hate who will look at me with hate and disgust for trying to not break. I’ve already had three all out panic attacks at practice before and i dont want to have more.

ill try to get it done. I just dont wanna fail bc you fail two classes you retake that grade and i cant because ill be behind my friends and they are the only lifeline. And in order to go to college i gotta do good. And i shouldnt be thinking about that im only 14 years old but my parents are like oh yeah college college. What are you gonna do. You could drop out at 16 and take the hisec and get a job and go to college early. And i say yeah i wanna stay in school bc normally i like it bc im a nerd.  IM A FRESHMAN i should be focusing on other stuff. And my teacher in computer art  makes everything worth so many points. If i miss one assignment my grade goes from an a to f. And i English i have a c and missing a 100point assignment would drop it to a d or f. My math grade is a low d. So…. God im ranting again. Sorry my brain is just whirling and im storming happy i dont have to do anything in this class. But i cant do my English work or my math work or any other work bc i can only do those in class and today we have this bs thing and im happy for it bc we get to hang out with kindergarteners and I love kids bc they are so innocent and pure and happy, but all my other classes are short, 

ok i swear im dont talking now. Sorry  

*SQUEEZE*

No, it's okay. You don't have to stop if you feel like you need to talk more

59 minutes ago, Mag said:

me every time my English teacher gives us an assignment: >:|

real

47 minutes ago, Mag said:

read an article

write a thing about

read another article

write a thing about it

read another thing

write something similar

KLAJ:LKSDJ:LKFJ:LKF okay I'm overreacting it's just frustrating

. . .

@Dabi

11 minutes ago, Mag said:

MAYBE

Idk about this teacher man . . . I try really hard to like her because she seems nice and a lot of other students love her. But she has such a weird vibe and acts very strangely sometimes (this is separate from the assignments btw, which are out of her control). It doesn't help that I have a super hard time reading her facial expressions for some reason (attack of the suspected neurodivergence)

*SQUEEZE*

[IcedOutPenguin He/Him]

1 hour ago, Spark of Hope said:

My sociology class has something similar

Over the course of the semester we have to analyze

- 4 articles/podcasts

- 2 documentaries (I hate documentaries)

- 1 book. This one finally gave me an excuse to read 1984

Thanks for telling me not to take sociology

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

1 minute ago, IcedOutPenguin said:

Thanks for telling me not to take sociology

Bruh that's not even bad

[Through the Living Hope]

3 minutes ago, IcedOutPenguin said:

Thanks for telling me not to take sociology

Don’t take differentiated sociology at my school. Unless you want free college credits 

[IcedOutPenguin He/Him]

3 minutes ago, Spark of Hope said:

Don’t take differentiated sociology at my school. Unless you want free college credits 

I will get all my credits through calculus!

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

3 minutes ago, IcedOutPenguin said:

I will get all my credits through calculus!

All of them?

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

*hmm-ing intensifies*

[IcedOutPenguin He/Him]

Just now, Through The Living Glass said:

All of them?

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

*hmm-ing intensifies*

Calc is easy

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

9 minutes ago, IcedOutPenguin said:

Calc is easy

mmmmm depending on your mental state I agree

[Existential]

17 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

mmmmm depending on your mental state I agree

*hugs *

[ANHlittleinsane girl but gendern't mostly]

5 hours ago, Hawks said:

*accepts*

*hugs*

SHUSH I HAVENT READ THE MANGA!!!!!! Shhhhhhh

*hugs*

You’re not late Dw. Still feel like crap today. I talked to my therapist and thats how it surfaced. Then the appointment ended before we could do anything so i got left without anything. 

I wouldn’t hate the real you. 

Ik i shouldnt feel guilty but when i go to practice barely able to keep my crap together after the day there’s the slontzees there is hate who will look at me with hate and disgust for trying to not break. I’ve already had three all out panic attacks at practice before and i dont want to have more.

ill try to get it done. I just dont wanna fail bc you fail two classes you retake that grade and i cant because ill be behind my friends and they are the only lifeline. And in order to go to college i gotta do good. And i shouldnt be thinking about that im only 14 years old but my parents are like oh yeah college college. What are you gonna do. You could drop out at 16 and take the hisec and get a job and go to college early. And i say yeah i wanna stay in school bc normally i like it bc im a nerd.  IM A FRESHMAN i should be focusing on other stuff. And my teacher in computer art  makes everything worth so many points. If i miss one assignment my grade goes from an a to f. And i English i have a c and missing a 100point assignment would drop it to a d or f. My math grade is a low d. So…. God im ranting again. Sorry my brain is just whirling and im storming happy i dont have to do anything in this class. But i cant do my English work or my math work or any other work bc i can only do those in class and today we have this bs thing and im happy for it bc we get to hang out with kindergarteners and I love kids bc they are so innocent and pure and happy, but all my other classes are short, 

ok i swear im dont talking now. Sorry  

*hugsHugshugshugshugd*
the curse of the highschooler

don’t apologize for ranting, this is a space just for that!

[Keke They/he]

3 hours ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*SQUEEZE*

No, it's okay. You don't have to stop if you feel like you need to talk more

real

. . .

@Dabi

*SQUEEZE*

*hugs* thanks. Im a bit better.

Story time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We had kindergarten day whete kindies came to school and we did things for them

Fun events of the day

"When I grow up I wanna work at Walmart. And own it!!!"

"Im gonna work at McDonald's cause its my favorite. And get happy meals daily."

*kid smacks me 10+times with shaving cream and now my clothes are dirty. Coats my arms all up and down*

*kid rolls on the cream filled table. Teacher yanks hik off and smacks him (legal in my state but not practiced)*

*had a lil autistic girl who was adorable*

*anxiety filled lil boy adoravleeeeer*

*highschooler play fights with kid and coats the floor themselves and the kid is shaving cream.*

*slightly alot of overstimulated.*

*has alot of fun bc kids and shaving cream and i have the maturity of a kindergartener*

3 hours ago, IcedOutPenguin said:

Calc is easy

*bombastic side eye*

3 hours ago, Through The Living Glass said:

mmmmm depending on your mental state I agree

*side eyes harder*

1 hour ago, alittleinsane said:

*hugsHugshugshugshugd*
the curse of the highschooler

don’t apologize for ranting, this is a space just for that!

Storming highschool. Can't wait for summer. 

*hugs*

I want milk and popcorn

When i get home im getting milk popcorn and curling in a blankie to watch helluva boss. 

 

Side note: it's so windy that I get blown back when I jump. xD welcome to Wyoming. 

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

2 minutes ago, Hawks said:

*hugs* thanks. Im a bit better.

Story time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We had kindergarten day whete kindies came to school and we did things for them

Fun events of the day

"When I grow up I wanna work at Walmart. And own it!!!"

"Im gonna work at McDonald's cause its my favorite. And get happy meals daily."

*kid smacks me 10+times with shaving cream and now my clothes are dirty. Coats my arms all up and down*

*kid rolls on the cream filled table. Teacher yanks hik off and smacks him (legal in my state but not practiced)*

*had a lil autistic girl who was adorable*

*anxiety filled lil boy adoravleeeeer*

*highschooler play fights with kid and coats the floor themselves and the kid is shaving cream.*

*slightly alot of overstimulated.*

*has alot of fun bc kids and shaving cream and i have the maturity of a kindergartener*

*bombastic side eye*

*side eyes harder*

Storming highschool. Can't wait for summer. 

*hugs*

I want milk and popcorn

When i get home im getting milk popcorn and curling in a blankie to watch helluva boss. 

 

Side note: it's so windy that I get blown back when I jump. xD welcome to Wyoming. 

*squeeze*

huh

Lol you live in Wyoming by choice?