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Posted
10 hours ago, Emperor Stick said:

Granted, they offer spiked meat and vegetables instead.

I wish to live in the cosmere.

Granted. you are a skaa who is sent to the pits of hathsin, and you die immediately.

I wish to be a shard. 

Posted
57 minutes ago, ShardShaper said:

Granted. you are a skaa who is sent to the pits of hathsin, and you die immediately.

I wish to be a shard. 

Granted, you become the shard of Stupidity. You control a planet where people have the ability to do incredibly stupid things using investiture. They all die within minutes, and then you offer yourself to be splintered by Odium.

I wish to be able to write a good essay

Posted

Granted, but it only comes out in Old English.

 

 

 

I wish for a genie (specifically a blue one that looks like Will Smith) to grant me more wishes.

Posted

Granted, an appropriate amount of money is deducted from your bank account

I wish that Brandon Sanderson could write at several times his current pace without it effecting the writing quality.

Posted
6 minutes ago, Emperor Stick said:

Granted, but he dies before he can publish any more books.

I wish I was rich.

Granted. Then you get arrested for money laundering.

 

I wish people would shut up.

Posted (edited)

Wow that was unexpected

I wish to bond a cryptic

Sorry about the double post

 

Granted you are now deafened

I wish that Brandon Sanderson will publish all the books in the Cosmere in record time.

Edited by Karger
Posted
5 hours ago, Emperor Stick said:

Granted, you cannot hear or see anymore.

I wish Moash would burn,

Granted, absolutely NO curse, for this wish transcends all other possible wishes

 

I wish that I could think of a good thing to wish for

Posted
5 hours ago, Karger said:

I wish to bond a cryptic

I wish that Brandon Sanderson will publish all the books in the Cosmere in record time.

Granted, but Moash is now alive and fine, and granted, but Moash is now immortal.

2 minutes ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Granted, absolutely NO curse, for this wish transcends all other possible wishes

I wish that I could think of a good thing to wish for

The Nightwatcher whispers a good thing to wish for in your ear: "Wish for a bane only, that the balance may be set right."

I wish for @Truthless of Shinovar to do the above.

Posted
Just now, AonEne said:

Granted, but Moash is now alive and fine, and granted, but Moash is now immortal.

The Nightwatcher whispers a good thing to wish for in your ear: "Wish for a bane only, that the balance may be set right."

I wish for @Truthless of Shinovar to do the above.

Ooh, granted, but now you are forced to read a separate 10 book series about Moash, which Brandon spends the rest of his life writing, thus never finishing all his other cosmere works.

I wish for a bane only

Posted
2 minutes ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

...you are forced to read a separate 10 book series about Moash, which Brandon spends the rest of his life writing, thus never finishing all his other cosmere works.

RIP. Enjoy a ten-book series about yourself, according to Per :P

2 minutes ago, Emperor Stick said:

I wish Shaladin was canon.

The Nightwatcher informs you that Ene will murder you once you leave the Valley. Shaladin is canon...but now you either have to stay there forever, or I avenge Shadolin by killing you.

I wish Shadolin was canon again so I didn't have to fight you.

Posted (edited)

Granted, but Adolin dies a horrible and gruesome death and never becomes radiant and shallan hooks with kaladin anyway. get shreked.

I wish to not be murdered by Ene once she reads this.

 

Edited by Emperor Stick
Posted (edited)
1 minute ago, Emperor Stick said:

Granted, but Adolin dies a horrible and gruesome death and never becomes radiant.

I wish to not be murdered by Ene once she reads this.

 

Granted, but Ene comes in the valley to murder you anyway

I wish not to be Moash

Edited by Truthless of Shinovar
Posted

One. Two. Three. I smile as I move forward. Never have I dueled an invulnerable human before. Flickering from character to character, my mind is not my own, nor is my appearance. Another step. Another. I'm in the Valley now, raising a weapon that shifts from one thing to another. Closer. Closer.

Posted

Closer. Closer. Per tries to run, but he's lost in the Valley's vines. The Nightwatcher lives up to her name, watching my advance impassively. Closer. Closer with each step.

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