Poor Kaladin

[Enigma]

Do you think it is due in part to his harsh criticism of himself?

[S. Stormy]

I feel like it's probably because a.) I don't think he knows how to relationship and b.) because he didn't pay enough attention to the relationship, he was too focused on fighting and protecting. Typical Kaladin stuff. Wow. Your profile pic changed.

Edited December 9, 2022 by Ookla the Pencil Taxi
oh storms I said intention instead of attention I'm SO ASHAMED (no this is not sarcasm)

[The_Milkgod]

On 10/9/2022 at 10:18 PM, Ookla the Frustrated. said:

No its fine.

Do you want to read the sample chapter about him from book 5 Brandon put out?

The whaat?

[Frustration]

10 minutes ago, The_Milkgod said:

The whaat?

Yeah, Brandon has read the prologue the first chapter and the first two flashbacks, you can find them in the arcanum, if you click discover and go to readings.

Edited December 9, 2022 by Ookla the Frustrated.

[The_Milkgod]

4 hours ago, Ookla the Frustrated. said:

Yeah, Brandon has read the prologue the first chapter and the first two flashbacks, you can find them in the arcanum, if you click discover and go to readings.

Thank you brotha.

[Tglassy]

I struggle with Depression.  I Identify with Dalinar quite a bit, being a tad older than Kaladin and the idea of taking responsibility for my actions, but I FEEL Kaladin.  I've been there.  So many times.  When it feels like someone hitched an anvil to my heart and it's dragging everything down.  When it has NO REASON.  When life is fine, but still I feel like the world is somehow darker and there isn't anything I can do to stop it.  I did a lot of soul searching when i was younger, and I realized that Depression doesn't NEED a reason to happen, but it will LATCH ON to whatever is around.  Kal's depression has latched on to his percieved failures.  It makes him see them as failures.  It makes him see everything as a failure.  It makes his successes into failures.  And I feel that.  I know that.  I am there right now.  

I've listened to these books half a dozen times in the last few years.  Partially to hear Dalinar's conquering of his past.  And partially to hear Kaladin push on.  To move forward anyway.  To drag that anvil through the dirt behind me.  I mean him.  This last book broke me.  I hated, HATED, Kaladin being taken off duty, but I felt so RELIEVED when it happened.  Isn't that weird?  I felt Kaladin's feelings of betrayal, but I was relieved.  It was like...can I finally rest, now?  Can I have a breather?  But there's so much more to do...And when he was fighting at the end.  When he figured he could "be Kaladin Stormblessed one more time."  God, I've been there.  I can be Tony Glass one more time.  Just one more time.  Every day is just one more time.

I think someone close to me struggles with it, as well, only they haven't faced what it is.  They still think there's an external reason for what they're feeling.  That it's happening TO them, instead of something inside warping their perspective.  So they continue to blame and spiral down.  And I see it.  I see what's happening.  And I just want to tell them that it'll be ok. It's not their fault.  It's not the fault of whatever they're blaming, either.  It just is.  And they just have to ride through it, because there is light on the other side.  

But they won't listen.  Because that's what Depression does.  It makes you think that there never were any light.  You were always in this darkness.  I can fight the Depression sometimes by ignoring the voices in my head.  By recognizing it for what it is and riding it out.  But if they won't do that, if they refuse to believe the problem is likely a chemical imbalance or whawtever Depression is...there's nothing I can do.  I just don't want them to go to the edge of the chasm and not have a Sil to give them a leaf...